r/relationships: he's just soggy moldy baby carrot

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: he's just soggy moldy baby carrot

Samovar: Jun 4, 2011; When I want to relax, I read an essay by Engels. When I want something more serious, I read Corto Maltese.

Wicked Them Beats posted:

The "our racism was entirely the result of a wicked third party playing evil mind tricks on us!" claim is a load of horseshit, but if they're going to keep their dumb opinions to themselves and Yang is satisfied with the state of things then it's about as good an outcome as you're going to get.

Won't be surprised by a follow up post five years from now when his relatives are saying racist poo poo about his kids.

Yeah... Similar thoughts were percolating in my brain, too. I hope it is as good as they are representing it, but... Yeah.

# ? May 8, 2024 07:27

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 01:44

Troublemaker: Mar 12, 2007

Here's one with a nice lil update

AITA for wearing white to a wedding?

quote:

I (27F) have a friend (25F) that just got married last Saturday. My friend is South Asian (not Indian) and she decided to wear a red traditional dress for her wedding. I asked what the dress code were, and she said that she genuinely just wanted her guests to look at their best. She also said that there isn�t a forbidden/frowned upon colour to wear as in Christian wedding in Europe. So I decided to go with a white cream dress (see in the link).

Anyways, I went to her wedding and had a good time. My friend said she really liked my dress. But while I was there, her other friends that are not south Asian, i.e. they are white, black and Hispanic and all Christian. They went up to me and started with small talk and one of the girls spilled pop all over me. I asked her what she just did and she said that I shouldn�t have come to a wedding with a white dress. AITA?

AITA for wearing white to a wedding?- UPDATE

quote:

UPDATE
Hi everyone!

So, time for an update. I told my friend about the situation after I posted because I didn�t want her to be angry right after/during her special day. But first let me explain what happened after she spilled soda on my dress. I went to the bride�s sister and explained everything and told her not to tell the bride. The sister and I went to the home of the bride and groom (she has the bride�s key and they live near the reception building) because my luggage was there and I changed. Luckly I had a dress, unfortunately it wasn�t a long gown but a short knee length dress. The bride noticed when I went back, and I lied and told her that the other dress wasn�t comfortable, and we went on with the party.

Then I sat down with the bride. I told her and she became so pissed and told me she never wanted to see those people again. We messaged the girl and the bride told her to pay up for the cleaning and the girl surprisingly paid the full amount. She had thought the bride wanted to stay friends but after she sent the money to the bride via venmo my friend blocked her and the others. She apologized and I told her it wasn�t her fault. I�m staying another week here and it feels a lot better with having told her everything. Thank you all for the replies on my other story.

# ? May 8, 2024 07:39

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

Malachite_Dragon posted:

Keep the son, set fire to the husband and MiL.

yes, once they are cooked you can eat them, solving several problems at once

# ? May 8, 2024 08:01

Nebrilos: Oct 9, 2012

Cool Dad posted:

She misheard, they were calling her Tony Pizza

That would make her even more angry. She hates being Tony Pizza.

Chewbecca posted:

Both MIL and husband can get hosed. How are they not even accounting for wife/DIL in the equation when eating? Where did they think the food came from?

Sounds like son is a good egg trying to make up for lovely family members

Of course they are accounting for OP in the equation when eating. There's no way that both of them would simply forget that she would need to eat too. This is probably their way of "helping her lose the pregnancy weight". Honestly, she should get a divorce.

Nebrilos fucked around with this message at 09:20 on May 8, 2024

# ? May 8, 2024 09:14

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

Nebrilos posted:

That would make her even more angry. She hates being Tony Pizza.

it's a real marinara flag

# ? May 8, 2024 09:21

Technocrat: Jan 30, 2011; I always finish what I sta

Troublemaker posted:

Here's one with a nice lil update

AITA for wearing white to a wedding?

AITA for wearing white to a wedding?- UPDATE

I know for Sri Lankan weddings one doesn't go for white since it's a funeral colour

# ? May 8, 2024 09:31

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Technocrat posted:

I know for Sri Lankan weddings one doesn't go for white since it's a funeral colour

I will wear white to a Sri Lankan wedding and sing My Way in a karaoke bar in the Philippines.

# ? May 8, 2024 09:34

kru: Oct 5, 2003

'Mound out of a molehill' made me lol

# ? May 8, 2024 09:40

datajugend: Jan 15, 2010; Cat Army

Hughlander posted:

Urge To Kill...Rising...

AITA for flipping out on my MIL and husband for eating all the food before I had eaten?

They ate FOUR pizzas?? Grandma glutton

# ? May 8, 2024 11:42

The Alchemist: Dec 12, 2010

MagusofStars posted:

OP apparently operates under the rules of mythical creatures, where she will answer a question honestly, but only the exact question asked.

Talk to stupid Sphinx, win stupid prizes

# ? May 8, 2024 11:43

Malachite_Dragon: Mar 31, 2010; Weaving Merry Christmas magic

The Alchemist posted:

Talk to stupid Sphinx,

"What is married in the morning, opens the relationship at midday, and single in the evening?"

# ? May 8, 2024 12:43

Jack-Off Lantern: Mar 2, 2012

You know the Sphinx just ate all the dumb people.

We need the Sphinx back

# ? May 8, 2024 12:46

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

My (29F) Husband (27M) allowed his Brother (30M) to propose to his Girlfriend (23F) at our wedding after I said No. Is our marriage salvageable?

quote:

Throwaway because my handle is a recognizable one. Names have been changed.

I married my sweet husband Liam last Saturday. It was perfect...except for one major hiccup during the reception.

Liam has an older brother, Ben and they're very close so it was no surprise when Liam asked Ben to be his best man. While I like most of my new in-laws, Ben has always rubbed me the wrong way with his behavior. He would crack all of these jokes that aren't really funny and tries way too hard to be the cool and popular guy. Think Screech from Saved by the Bell. Only ten times more annoying.

To be honest, I feel somewhat sorry for Ben. Liam was diagnosed with high functioning autism when he and Ben were kids. As a result, their parents lavished more time and attention on Liam. This led to Ben being emotionally neglected and as a result, he acted out big time in their teens. He got into trouble and this led to their parents swinging the pendulum in the opposite direction, lavishing attention on Ben. Liam kept his head down and didn't say anything. To this day, their parents are more likely to side with Ben than Liam.

Liam is a sweet guy, as I mentioned. Unfortunately, he is a bit of a people pleaser and doesn't really understand social etiquette and cues very well. It has caused some problems but I don't regret knowing him or even marrying him.

4 weeks ago, Liam and I were having dinner with his parents and Ben. Everything was fun and we were all talking about plans outside the wedding.

That's when Ben revealed that he had plans to ask his girlfriend of 5 years, Melody, to marry him. Of course we were all excited and asked about his plans for the proposal. That's when Ben turned to Liam and said "I was hoping to do it at the reception!"

I laughed nervously, knowing his tendency to make bad jokes and told him "You do that any my brothers will throw you out of the venue!" But Ben got offended that I laughed...and I realized he was being serious!

Instead of asking me what I thought (which he's pretty good about doing), Liam said "Of course you can! Melody will love it!"

I touched Liam's arm and said "We'll talk about it later." He didn't understand why I was so upset. I just wanted to get out of there as my MIL and FIL were too busy congratulating Ben and wouldn't be able to tell Liam why it was a bad idea.

Liam and I moved to a different room and I explained to him about how another person proposing or making a major announcement was in bad taste as it takes away from the bride and groom. Liam nodded, crestfallen. Feeling sorry for him, I said "How about this, we organize a party with Ben for him to propose to Melody at? It would be far more memorable." Liam liked the idea and we both went out.

I told Ben that we were willing to help organize a special party so he can propose to Melody there. But he was not to propose at our wedding. Ben nodded and I thought that was the end of that.

Saturday rolls around and the day goes off without a hitch. We get everything done and it's time for the reception. Ben, as best man, has a speech prepared for us. It was full of bad jokes and weird attempts at puns but it was overall very nice. Part of Ben's speech was to move around the tables, which should've been a red flag but I decided to not say anything.

At the end of the speech. Ben stopped at Melody and proposed!

I was so mad that I stormed out. Liam and my mom came to comfort me. Liam apologized over and over, saying "They told me it'd be fine. They told me it'd be fine."

I was just done at that point. Mom offered to drive me home. Liam kept begging for forgiveness but I told him "Don't call me. I'll call you." and left.

Needless to say, Liam and I haven't seen each other since. My side of the family is angry at Liam and his family. His family, on the other hand are congratulating Ben and Melody. Most of their Facebook feed are pictures of Ben's proposal.

I was prepared to file for annulment and move on. That's until Liam sent me an email. I learned that Ben and their parents applied the pressure over and over on Liam until he finally caved the night before the wedding. I asked him why he didn't come to me and he said "You were so stressed and I didn't want to worry you!" Liam concluded with "I want another chance. Please give me another chance!"

Now I'm really torn. I don't like that Liam went behind my back thanks to family pressure. That's not a good sign for a marriage. On the other hand? I still love him and since he's a horrible liar, I know he's telling the truth.

I still haven't made up my mind about what I want to do. Is our marriage salvageable? Can we rebuild? Liam is genuine but can I persuade him that a family should never do that to a member?

TLDR: My husband was pressured into letting his brother propose to his girlfriend at our wedding reception after I said no. Said husband is begging for another chance. What do I do?

# ? May 8, 2024 13:18

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

I feel like �I didn�t want to stress you out� is the most common excuse men use when lying to their partners or withholding information.

# ? May 8, 2024 13:30

mystes: May 31, 2006

It makes sense since people don't usually get at all stressed out when someone goes behind their back to do something they explicitly said they weren't okay with during something that's already one of the most stressful days of their life

# ? May 8, 2024 13:32

AceClown: Sep 11, 2005

AITA for refusing to give my stepdaughter a graduation present?

quote:

I (48M) have been married to my wife (43F) for 6 years. She has a daughter (18F) from a previous relationship who I'll call Amy. Amy just graduated high school last week.

For months, my wife kept asking me what I planned to give Amy for a graduation gift. I told her I didn't plan on getting Amy anything since she's not my biological daughter and we've never been particularly close.

Amy has made it clear over the years that she doesn't really see me as a father figure, which is fine. But it has meant we've never built much of a bond beyond basic politeness when living under the same roof.
Well, my wife was furious when I said I wouldn't be getting a gift. She accused me of never making an effort with Amy and playing favorites since I gave my own daughter (22F) a nice graduation gift a few years ago. I tried explaining that's different since my daughter is, well, my actual daughter who I raised from birth.

Amy overheard the argument and started crying, saying I obviously don't care about her at all. My wife doubled down that not giving her daughter a gift for this milestone was unbelievably hurtful and disrespectful.

In my view, I'm not obligated to give gifts to kids who frankly don't want me involved in that role. But now I've got my wife and stepdaughter thinking I'm being massively insensitive.

So reddit, AITA here?

have a guy who is getting roasted to gently caress in the comments

# ? May 8, 2024 13:38

Pantaloon Pontiff: Jun 25, 2023

Safety Dance posted:

Using my own fleshlight at work

I thought this was going to be an autocorrect posting at first, where we'd just laugh at the poor newbie who had one letter wrong in his question. I was not prepared for union-provided fleshlights.

datajugend posted:

They ate FOUR pizzas?? Grandma glutton

At first I thought these were tiny individual pizzas since she talked about them being homemade, but they also talked about cutting them into slices and you don't usually slice tiny pizzas.

# ? May 8, 2024 13:45

Steve Vader: Apr 29, 2005; Everyone's Playing!

Why can't people just explain "you don't propose at other people's weddings because you are taking someone else's celebration and making it about you, and that's rude and lovely."

# ? May 8, 2024 13:52

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Sometimes I think it's the incredulity, that you actually have to explain that to another human being in the first place.

# ? May 8, 2024 13:55

Malachite_Dragon: Mar 31, 2010; Weaving Merry Christmas magic

For the kind of person who wants to propose at someone else's wedding, the rudeness is the point.

# ? May 8, 2024 13:56

Ominous Jazz: Jun 15, 2011; Big D is chillin' over here
Wasteland style

artsy fartsy posted:

AITAH for kicking my (26F) boyfriend (31M) and his friends (27-34M) out after I overherd a conversation where they compared me to Tony Soprano?

fake sopranos fans, they would have called her a goomah :colbert:

# ? May 8, 2024 13:58

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Yeah, they don't need it to be explained because they don't care. They see it as the most logical way of saving a whole bunch of time and money because "everyone we know and love will already be at the wedding"

# ? May 8, 2024 13:59

Steve Vader: Apr 29, 2005; Everyone's Playing!

Yeah, less intentionally rude and more just completely lazy and moochful.

# ? May 8, 2024 14:01

Danger: Jan 4, 2004; all desire - the thirst for oil, war, religious salvation - needs to be understood according to what he calls 'the demonogrammatical decoding of the Earth's body'

mystes posted:

The probability distribution of a murder suicide occurring in a specific places makes no difference in terms of the expected probability of one occurring a second time given that one occurred to a first time compared to one occurring for the first time if two events of murder suicide are uncorrelated, and based on the central limit you can still get a normal distribution of the frequencies in that case, which is what I assume you actually mean by murder suicides being normally distributed.

On the other hand, if you assume that probabilities of murder suicides in areas follow a normal distribution or something in a bayesian way, I think a past murder suicide suicide would be positively correlated with future murder suicide.

It�s only takes 30 houses in the same room for the likelihood that two of them share a murder-suicide day to be over 50%

# ? May 8, 2024 14:03

Benagain: Oct 10, 2007; Can you see that I am serious?; Fun Shoe

2 houses sharing the same murder suicide?

# ? May 8, 2024 14:06

Ominous Jazz: Jun 15, 2011; Big D is chillin' over here
Wasteland style

AceClown posted:

AITA for refusing to give my stepdaughter a graduation present?

have a guy who is getting roasted to gently caress in the comments

"we aren't particularly close" bud you've been in her life for 6 years plus. obviously this is news to her.

# ? May 8, 2024 14:17

Harold Fjord: Jan 3, 2004; Can't post for 3 days!

It's weird when adults think kids are supposed to be like adults and responsible for their interpersonal relationship just like the adult is. Because obviously they don't actually treat children like they're real people in any other context

# ? May 8, 2024 14:27

Kuiperdolin: Sep 5, 2011; to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022

Benagain posted:

2 houses sharing the same murder suicide?

# ? May 8, 2024 14:31

Ominous Jazz: Jun 15, 2011; Big D is chillin' over here
Wasteland style

Harold Fjord posted:

It's weird when adults think kids are supposed to be like adults and responsible for their interpersonal relationship just like the adult is. Because obviously they don't actually treat children like they're real people in any other context

america being the only country not to ratify the UN Rights of the Child is frustrating

# ? May 8, 2024 14:36

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

Pantaloon Pontiff posted:

I thought this was going to be an autocorrect posting at first, where we'd just laugh at the poor newbie who had one letter wrong in his question. I was not prepared for union-provided fleshlights.

i also thought this, it took me a bit lol
what an incredible brain on the OP

# ? May 8, 2024 14:39

Slo-Tek: Jun 8, 2001; WINDOWS 98 BEAT HIS FRIEND WITH A SHOVEL

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Yeah, they don't need it to be explained because they don't care. They see it as the most logical way of saving a whole bunch of time and money because "everyone we know and love will already be at the wedding"

I don't think I'd have minded if the timing were right. If I'm already hitched, dances danced, and halfway to drunk and horny and on my way out of the venue, if a cousin or sibling or something wanted to have 2 whole minutes of my Special Day to announce an announcement? Seems possible to me. Obviously, it can be done badly and inconsiderately, and I'd want to talk it through first, but I'm not convinced it is a third rail faux pas that you are automatically an rear end in a top hat for thinking.

# ? May 8, 2024 14:49

deported to Canada: Jun 1, 2006

I think if you ask and are specifically told not to do it then it does in fact automatically make you an rear end in a top hat.

# ? May 8, 2024 14:58

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Slo-Tek posted:

I don't think I'd have minded if the timing were right. If I'm already hitched, dances danced, and halfway to drunk and horny and on my way out of the venue, if a cousin or sibling or something wanted to have 2 whole minutes of my Special Day to announce an announcement? Seems possible to me. Obviously, it can be done badly and inconsiderately, and I'd want to talk it through first, but I'm not convinced it is a third rail faux pas that you are automatically an rear end in a top hat for thinking.

Sure, but waiting until people have started wandering off defeats the purpose of hijacking a big event where everyone's already gathered so that's not what people are typically doing.

Then at the other extreme you get stuff like this:

WIBTA if I proposed to my girlfriend after my brother's destination wedding?

quote:

My brother and my future SIL will have a destination wedding in the Philippines. And they wanted us to fly in 2 days prior to their wedding day. However, they're not paying for any of our flights, hotel, food and etc.

My girlfriend grew up in the Philippines and moved to the USA at 13 (She's 27 now), but haven't visited her home country at all. She has told me she wanted to visit the country to pay respects to her late grandparents and to see the beaches again.

Well, since we're there, we planned to extend our stay for another week or two after my brother's wedding. And during that time, I plan to pop the question (we've talked about marriage, and she gave me to okay sign to propose).

I was dropping off some stuff to my brother and future SIL, and my brother joked about me getting married. I then mentioned to him that I plan to propose in the Philippines. I explained that we're extending our stay in the country and staying at a different island after the reception.

My brother was thrilled, and promised to not let the beans spill. However, my future SIL overheard the conversation and screamed at me to not do that. That the trip to the Philippines was all about their wedding, and I will be a major rear end in a top hat if I proposed.

My brother chimed and said I won't be an rear end in a top hat, and it's not like I'm proposing at their wedding/reception. And might as well make use of the travel.

FSIL said that it would be taking away the attention from their wedding.

IIRC there was another story from the previous thread where someone proposed privately in their hotel room after the reception was done and dusted and got told off for it, but I'm not going to spend a lot of time digging.

# ? May 8, 2024 14:58

idiotsavant: Jun 4, 2000

Mx. posted:

My (29F) Husband (27M) allowed his Brother (30M) to propose to his Girlfriend (23F) at our wedding after I said No. Is our marriage salvageable?

The immediate annulment feels weird cause like, didn�t you knowingly sign up to marry a guy with high-functioning autism? Who isn�t great in social situations? His toxic family ran over him in a social situation and you�re mad that he didn�t handle it well. Did this lady not think anything through when she decided to marry him?

# ? May 8, 2024 15:04

OneSizeFitsAll: Sep 13, 2010; Du bist mein Sofa

FSIL is an entitled moron - how can it take attention away from the wedding if it happens afterwards and in private? What, just because it happens to be in the same country (don't get me started on "destination" weddings)? FSIL can go gently caress herself.

# ? May 8, 2024 15:06

Ensign Expendable: Nov 11, 2008; Lager beer is proof that god loves us; Pillbug

the holy poopacy posted:

Sure, but waiting until people have started wandering off defeats the purpose of hijacking a big event where everyone's already gathered so that's not what people are typically doing.

Then at the other extreme you get stuff like this:

WIBTA if I proposed to my girlfriend after my brother's destination wedding?

IIRC there was another story from the previous thread where someone proposed privately in their hotel room after the reception was done and dusted and got told off for it, but I'm not going to spend a lot of time digging.

How dare you propose during my birthday month, you selfish monster?

# ? May 8, 2024 15:14

mystes: May 31, 2006

I don't have any strong feelings about family members announcing their own weddings at someone else's wedding ceremony inherently but it seems like, at least in the case of people who want to do this despite being told no, they do so specifically because it's very important that they announce their wedding in person to receive attention, and therefore they are essentially intentionally trying to hijack the attention given to the bride and groom in the wedding

However, by the same token the people who say no to this seem to also have an unhealthy attitude towards their own wedding ceremony

# ? May 8, 2024 15:15

Steve Vader: Apr 29, 2005; Everyone's Playing!

That whole DONT TAKE MY ATTENTION ITS ALL MINE PEOPLE EXIST ONLY TO LOOK AT ME TODAY vibe is unsettling, but I also get that a lot of women are poo poo upon daily by this world so they may put an inordinate amount of stock into the one day they can assume they will be treated well and as if they are important.

# ? May 8, 2024 15:16

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

My ex-wife and I wanted to get married in the summer (indoors) and my sister threw a fit because her three children were born in June, July, and August and our anniversary taking place during any of those months would render their birthdays meaningless or something.

EDIT: I think people are getting hung up on the idea of this sort of thing being done at a wedding. It would also be inappropriate to announce your engagement during your sibling's graduation party, for example.

# ? May 8, 2024 15:18

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 01:44

babypolis: Nov 4, 2009

mom and dad fight a lot posted:

Final Update: AITAH - My friend keeps on talking about my Ex in front of my fianc�e

I'm not crying, you're crying.

congrats to OP on finding a diamond tier wife, drat

# ? May 8, 2024 15:27

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