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mystes posted:I really don't know why it's somehow considered okay to tell people that they need to get married when they don't want to.
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May 9, 2024 21:40
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3D Megadoodoo posted:I don't tell people when I have my Summer holiday because if I do, they'll ask me if I'm planning on travelling and I say no, they'll do something real stupid like starting a sentence with "In that case, could you". People try and get you to do work for them on your vacation!? You need to post one of these stories on r/relationships so we can repost it here and wax on about acid vats.
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May 9, 2024 21:46
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mystes posted:I really don't know why it's somehow considered okay to tell people that they need to get married when they don't want to. Seeing somebody else ignoring social norms and being happy has to be maddening for the person who followed them and is miserable.
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May 9, 2024 21:49
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FMguru posted:Another favorite genre, someone who has finally hit their limit when it comes to putting up with crap, and fires back with full receipts. I notice the family wasn't telling the aunt to shut up, just the OP.
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May 9, 2024 21:59
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mystes posted:I really don't know why it's somehow considered okay to tell people that they need to get married when they don't want to. My favorite strain of this is people constantly demanding to think about children. My wife and I decided early that we never wanted to have children and that I would get a vasectomy. drat near every our lives outside of our immedate families were aghast by this decision and told us we would regret it etc etc. Many of these people had children and they would frequently complain about their lives.
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May 9, 2024 22:20
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mystes posted:I really don't know why it's somehow considered okay to tell people that they need to get married when they don't want to. Sometimes you really need an alliance or a claim on a specific duchy
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May 9, 2024 22:22
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Mordiceius posted:I'm the same. But I'm also a late-diagnosed autistic. SulfurMonoxideCute posted:We're in the same club then lmao Read that as "late-stage autism" and briefly hung my head solemnly.
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May 9, 2024 22:33
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3D Megadoodoo posted:I don't tell people when I have my Summer holiday because if I do, they'll ask me if I'm planning on travelling and I say no, they'll do something real stupid like starting a sentence with "In that case, could you". I have a friend who, without fail, asks me to play Pokémon Go for her. I never do, but she asks every time anyway.
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May 9, 2024 22:34
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SulfurMonoxideCute posted:I have a friend who, without fail, asks me to play Pokémon Go for her. I never do, but she asks every time anyway. Pokemon GO on vacation
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May 9, 2024 22:47
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My longtime friend [63M] who is like a father to me asked to see me [30F] naked as his dying wish.quote:My friend Charles has long been like a father to me. We worked together at my first job and he helped me get through a really tough couple of years there. I have had a history of abuse from men, especially my own father, and this guy really became a positive male role model in my life. He never had children, and for the last thirteen years has called and thought of me as an adoptive daughter.
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May 9, 2024 23:03
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SulfurMonoxideCute posted:That "work" is one of my most fun and obsessive hobbies. I go completely psychotic and overboard about planning a trip, I spend hundreds of hours researching, making multiple itineraries with numerous spreadsheets and word documents, and create custom Google Earth .kml files organized into folders by day so the pins don't get too cluttered. And then during the trip I throw half of it out the window without regret because I know what I've created is actually impossible, but I just find it so much fun. Anything that got missed then gets jotted down in the "for next time" document. .kml more like .kms if I ever travel with someone that does this
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May 9, 2024 23:08
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wheatpuppy posted:You can order and eat dessert first. There's no rule that prevents it! i like to eat it after the entrees but also i like it to come to the table when im like half done with the entrees so i can decide if im gonna be full before desert so i can switch to desert because entrees keep and deserts dont usually.
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May 9, 2024 23:08
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Cythereal posted:My longtime friend [63M] who is like a father to me asked to see me [30F] naked as his dying wish. 
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May 9, 2024 23:17
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Chewbecca posted:The catacombs were sold out. Yeah, because people are dying to get in!  Anyway, have dumb teenagers being dumb teenagers. Kid on spectrum gave edible to someone at school (it’s illegal in our state), she passed out at school. Help! quote:
Top advice is get a lawyer and follow their instructions.
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May 9, 2024 23:17
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Moon Slayer posted:Yeah, because people are dying to get in!
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May 9, 2024 23:18
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mystes posted:Not going to read that based on the title but He was just kidding. He thought they would laugh about it together, as a joke ha ha
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May 9, 2024 23:27
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Its a souvenir request
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May 9, 2024 23:53
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How about some more wedding drama - My [26F] mother-in-law [50sF] threw a tantrum after our wedding ceremony and missed the entire reception. I'm trying really hard to control my rage about it. Should I go no-contact with her? quote:Me and my new husband's wedding was this Sunday, and it was absolutely beautiful. We've been together for almost eight years, and I've known his family for that length as well. Everything was perfect except for this one horrible instance with my mother-in-law.
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May 9, 2024 23:56
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quote:six years ago while we were visiting I told my husband that I was going to grab a coffee from Starbucks and I asked if he wanted anything. I didn't remember my manners, apparently, to ask Jolene if she ALSO wanted anything from Starbucks, and she's held a grudge about it all this time, thinking that I'm a bad person and "wasn't raised right".  How does a person operate like this?
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May 10, 2024 00:04
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It sounds like your MIL is already no-contact with you so just sit back and enjoy life
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May 10, 2024 00:07
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wheatpuppy posted:You can order and eat dessert first. There's no rule that prevents it! In Italy there likely is a rule.
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May 10, 2024 00:07
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Mordiceius posted:How about some more wedding drama - as I southerner I can say with 100% certainty that these people are southern
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May 10, 2024 00:09
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Ominous Jazz posted:what sort of stuff do you do on your holiday Whatever I want, as opposed to whatever someone else wants.
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May 10, 2024 00:11
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Nerdlord Actual posted:
Mental illness.
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May 10, 2024 00:14
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Nerdlord Actual posted:
You can ask my mother. I won't do it because I was well over this poo poo years ago and am currently no-contact.
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May 10, 2024 00:31
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hawowanlawow posted:as I southerner I can say with 100% certainty that these people are southern Nobody can hold a grudge that the person it's held against doesn't even know about as long as a passive-aggressive Southerner.
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May 10, 2024 00:34
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I've known a couple of people like that in my life, they will take the most minor of conflicts or slights and just will never ever forget them to the point of still bringing them up years later. I've no idea if it's related to some kind of mental health thing or what it's called, but it must be the most exhausting poo poo ever for them and everyone they interact with.
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May 10, 2024 00:42
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AITA for using my daughter’s debit card to get a money gram order?quote:I, 54F have worked my entire life, but for the past several months I’ve fallen hard financially and have lost my job, so I am only receiving unemployement, and believe me, it is not enough. At all. I am behind on rent, but faithfully I have a really good landlord who is very good to work with, but I am now behind 2 months on payments and although I’ve paid half of it on my own, I’ve still owed the remaining balance, which is 2237$.
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May 10, 2024 00:44
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was expecting a title bait and switch but welp.
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May 10, 2024 00:56
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AceClown posted:I've known a couple of people like that in my life, they will take the most minor of conflicts or slights and just will never ever forget them to the point of still bringing them up years later. Mordiceius posted:AITA for using my daughter’s debit card to get a money gram order?
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May 10, 2024 00:56
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Cythereal posted:My longtime friend [63M] who is like a father to me asked to see me [30F] naked as his dying wish. Yeah this one just must makes me sad. The wife is probably going to be confused when this woman (rightfully) cuts contact with the dying man and doesn't know what happened  mystes posted:I think it's pretty fair to call that a mental health thing at that point (regardless of whether it's something in the DSM or not) Yeah I feel there is a lot unsaid here. My guess is daughter had no idea about the imminent eviction and that the op maybe has a tendency to play fast and loose with the truth
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May 10, 2024 01:22
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Nerdlord Actual posted:
My mom is exactly like this. I can totally see her walking out of a major important event because she took something the wrong way, and if you don't side with her on it than you're against her. She did it at more minor events growing up and it was always so embarrassing to be dragged out with her because someone made a comment that she took the wrong way, and then she'd just bitch and bitch and bitch about that person the entire way home. Even little-kid me was like, WTF? One example: I was pregnant with my second kid. She lived two hours away from the hospital I was giving birth in (my in-laws lived 20 minutes away) and refused to stay at my house unless she could bring her horrible, destructive, aggressive, unhouse-trained dogs with her. My in-laws volunteered to stay at my house or theirs and bring my oldest to see me multiple times a day. My mom not only never watched my then-2-year-old, but she showed no interest in him even when we visited (my in-laws were very close to him, babysat for him, and were very involved in his life. My mom didn't know or care a drat thing about him; she never even asked about him or paid attention to him, and for the longest time at holidays she'd give him gifts that'd obviously been picked out for a girl (my brother had 3 girls) that she'd forgotten to give them so just repurposed for my kid. I'm talking, up til he was like 10 and still getting girl toys and girl clothes like black satin pants. Not that I give a poo poo about the whole gender-norms thing, but it was the absolute lack of effort or interest that got to me). My mom is a hoarder and her house was highly unsafe for a toddler. She had her prescription bottles sitting out on the counter with the child-proof lids off so they were easier for her, and refused to put them out of reach when we visited. She also left sharp things like scissors, tacks, needles, screwdrivers, and knives just laying around, and saw no problem with my kid putting filthy stuff in his mouth that he picked up of the floor (I'm talking, like, covered in literal grime, dog spit, and probably roach and rat feces). So when she asked who'd be watching my oldest when I gave birth to my second, I said my in-laws, thinking not only, Duh, but I figured she'd be thrilled I wasn't going to ask her to do it. She said, "Fine," and hung up on me. Didn't talk to me again until I was heading to the hospital and I called to let her know and she said, "Good for you. Have a nice life." I was in pain, distraught, confused, and totally WTF trying to figure out what I'd done now to piss her off and discovered she'd been stewing about this for weeks, bad-mouthing me to anyone who'd listen. She went on a tirade about how I don't think she's good enough to watch my son and I must prefer my in-laws and I'm stuck up and selfish and a lovely daughter and horrible person . . . . I ended up having a HORRIBLE experience with my C-section and recovery, and even had a hard time bonding with my new little dude for a couple days because I was emotionally and psychologically a loving wreck. My sister finally talked her down, but it was so incredibly lovely and all I can think about when I think of my second kid's birth. She gets all pissed off about some imagined slight and then will hold a grudge, literally, forever. When my brother was little, like 5 or 6, my dad's sister who lived next door came over and told my mom he'd been digging up her flowerbeds. My mom was FURIOUS that her little angel could be accused of such a thing and didn't talk to my aunt again. She turned my brother against her and tried to get my sister and me mad at her too, but she was my favorite aunt so gently caress that. She was so kind and good to us, despite my mother absolutely hating her. My aunt died about 55 years later and my mom hadn't talked to her in all that time, and still had nothing good to say about her, even though my brother was like, yeah, I was a little poo poo, I probably WAS digging in her flowerbeds. She would pull this poo poo all the time with us, pitting us kids against each other or against my dad by blowing something completely out of proportion or flat-out reading something wrong and immediately going full-on attack mode. Once my sister and I were talking to her about my sister-in-law and she went and gave my sister-in-law a majorly hosed up version of things we'd said (we hadn't been poo poo talking her at all, just talking about our own experiences with something she was going through and my mom turned it into some kind of competition like we were bragging or poo poo-talking her. SIL got so mad at us she and my brother's entire family ghosted us for about 6 months before we figured out what had happened.). She finally did it one too many times not long after the C-section thing and I told her, literally, to gently caress off. I had two glorious years of no contact with her until my dad died, and then we reconciled. She's never pulled that poo poo with me again, and if she starts up complaining about something someone obviously did to her on purpose I just change the subject. I'm way too old to entertain that bullshit. THAT SAID ... I don't know why most people who are like this end up that way, but I can kind of see it in my mom's history. She grew up with a physically and emotionally abusive alcoholic father and was very poor. She started kindergarten at 4 when the other kids were 5 or 6 so she was always bullied, not just for being younger and smaller and immature and unprepared, but for her poverty and abusive home life. She got married at like 18 and her husband died of leukemia within a year. She grew up with a lot of hurt and pain and bitterness and trauma and never got therapy, so she turned it into a very self-centered, poor-me, take-everything-personally, attack before you're attacked kind of personality. She never really matured emotionally to the point of not seeing everything from only her own point of view and how it affects her, and she just expects everyone to not like her or be talking about her or trying to hurt her. Now that I get that I can deal with her better (also, she's in her 80s and in a nursing home), but it made the first 40 years or so of my life pretty hellish. Anyway, sorry for the trauma dump/effort post. That was cathartic.
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May 10, 2024 01:41
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Troublemaker posted:Anyway, sorry for the trauma dump/effort post. That was cathartic. NAH
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May 10, 2024 01:43
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Like when my boyfriend's mom wrote my mom a letter when I went to their farm for the weekend in 1999, she wrote "we're good people and you don't need to worry, she's safe with us" and my mom interpreted it as "we took your child away because you're dangerous and bad". 25 years later and being told numerous times by numerous people that she interpreted it wrong and she still believes her own side. I tried for YEARS to combine our holiday dinners together as one big family and it was only my mom that prevented it from happening because she still hates my now mother-in-law. She would always lie and say "oh I planned to have dinner with my friend, can't make it". I only found out the actual truth a few years ago. I couldn't believe it. Just another nail in the coffin of our dead relationship.
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May 10, 2024 02:16
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Some people just exist inside their own victim narrative, and nothing you say or do will convince them otherwise It's extraordinary really
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May 10, 2024 02:19
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Troublemaker posted:Anyway, sorry for the trauma dump/effort post. That was cathartic. Also NAHH You mind find the Rejected Parents thread of interest, https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3893726
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May 10, 2024 02:21
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Thanks peeps  SulfurMonoxideCute: That's EXACTLY how my mom is. She would misinterpret everything, I think because she was coming at it from a place of hurt and no self-confidence and just assumed everything was an attack on her. When you're used to being beat up all your life, you're just waiting for the next blow to come, and every movement around you feels like an offense. While I feel for her, it's also SO exhausting when no amount of explanation from any number of people will convince her and you're dealing with the fallout with all the people she's pissed at. Going NC is sometimes the only way to deal with it, for your own mental/physiological health. So here's a different kind of mom problem: Clogged toilet destroyed my house. Landlord says I have to pay. quote:My mom who is 67, rents at a nice senior community. She is very happy with her agangmenta. But now she might be thrown out. She had old chicken soup that spoiled. So she dumped it in the toilet and flushed it. Then went in a walk in the park. After returning couple hours later, her whole apartment was flooded from the toilet, sink, shower. It turned out she flushed a chicken bone and it got stuck in the main pipe 12 feet from her toilet. She lives on the first floor, 4 floors on top of her. And 8 bathrooms go in her main drain. The waist from the upstairs people flooded my mom's and her neighbors whole apartments.
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May 10, 2024 02:59
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Do not flush things down the toilet that do not normally go down the toilet.
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May 10, 2024 03:08
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Troublemaker posted:Thanks peeps 1) Someone pointed out that the image appears on other websites like https://www.dilagosplumbing.com/plumbing/clogged-toilet 2) The title says "my house" and the body text says that it's OP's mother's apartment
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May 10, 2024 03:11
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She absolutely shouldn't have flushed the soup. But she'd have been way better off, once making that stupid choice, shutting up about why it happened. "Bathroom looked fine when I left! No idea what happened!" How would they know which apartment flushed it?
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May 10, 2024 03:13
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