USPOL Sep: Hillary has tuberculosis

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > USPOL Sep: Hillary has tuberculosis

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Wasn't there supposed to be some FBI report about Hillary's emails coming out yesterday? Did it come out and just get buried by Trump's Trumping, or did it get pushed back for some reason?

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:10

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# ? Jun 4, 2024 22:15

Uranium 235: Oct 12, 2004

Internet Webguy posted:

Too bad the lesson that will be taken away here is "be less blatantly racist next time."

They've been honing their dog whistle racism for fifty years, but this year a complete outsider won the primary in part because of his willingness to be blatantly racist.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:11

fishmech: Jul 16, 2006; by VideoGames; Salad Prong

It's also worth remembering that media methods don't really go away, even if they stop being massively popular. 75% of the country still listens to AM/FM radio intentionally during a typical week, despite everything that's come out since. Cable TV structure isn't likely to go away at all, even when it's delivered over internet connections as it's likely to be - it'll simply be less popular than it was at its peak in the mid 2000s.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:12

Instant Sunrise: Apr 12, 2007; The manger babies don't have feelings. You said it yourself.

People still listen to AM/FM radio because people still drive to work.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:14

The Puppet Master: Apr 9, 2005; Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me. I'd fuck me hard.

Instant Sunrise posted:

People still listen to AM/FM radio because people still drive to work.

does that mean that morning djs have the greatest sway over the nation?

that is troubling

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:15

happyhippy: Feb 21, 2005; Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup; Pillbug

Internet Webguy posted:

Too bad the lesson that will be taken away here is "be less blatantly racist next time."

I've always wondered if businesses go 'No you cannot get any time off to vote. In fact I need you to do triple shift that whole day or you are fired' much to try to stop people from voting.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:16

Augus: Mar 9, 2015

The Puppet Master posted:

does that mean that morning djs have the greatest sway over the nation?

that is troubling

"As a matter of fact I am having a good commute today! Thank you for asking." and then they go vote for the morning guy in the presidential general

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:17

AlouetteNR: Jun 6, 2011

mandatory lesbian posted:

the people who say god is nature, generally speaking, don't think of god as a being or whatever, but i guess that dovetails into trying to come up with a definition of what god is or means and that's not gonna be a great convo huh

I think it really depends on who's saying it and where they're coming from. Scientists and philosophers tend to mean it as 'God is the universe which has no will outside of what happens', strong environmentalists tend to imply it as God being the will of nature, like a LoTR-style Ent God who can be angered and defied by clear-cutting a forest, and softer Christians tend to imply a sort of watchmaker theory without attaching themselves to the more Biblical aspects of wrath and hellfire or the historical events which can be disproved. I would say the last two definitely think of God as a being, with a sort of cognizance and will and opinions.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:18

Kro-Bar: Jul 24, 2004; USPOL May

Instant Sunrise posted:

People still listen to AM/FM radio because people still drive to work.

Did cars stop having tape/cd players or MP3 inputs or something? Who listens to the loving radio?

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:18

Good soup!: Nov 2, 2010

Kro-Bar posted:

Did cars stop having tape/cd players or MP3 inputs or something? Who listens to the loving radio?

NPR stations alone have something like 30 million listeners a week, so, a lot of people I guess.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:21

WeAreTheRomans: Feb 23, 2010; by R. Guyovich

Kro-Bar posted:

Did cars stop having tape/cd players or MP3 inputs or something? Who listens to the loving radio?

do you really not think people listen to the radio or are you just being obtuse?

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:22

mandatory lesbian: Dec 18, 2012

AlouetteNR posted:

I think it really depends on who's saying it and where they're coming from. Scientists and philosophers tend to mean it as 'God is the universe which has no will outside of what happens', strong environmentalists tend to imply it as God being the will of nature, like a LoTR-style Ent God who can be angered and defied by clear-cutting a forest, and softer Christians tend to imply a sort of watchmaker theory without attaching themselves to the more Biblical aspects of wrath and hellfire or the historical events which can be disproved. I would say the last two definitely think of God as a being, with a sort of cognizance and will and opinions.

the funny thing is saying god is nature and god is the universe aren't really saying different things, even if they have different meanings

Kro-Bar posted:

Did cars stop having tape/cd players or MP3 inputs or something? Who listens to the loving radio?

i do

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:22

mandatory lesbian: Dec 18, 2012

it's easier to get new stuff to listen to on the radio then looking for it myself

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:23

Daniel Bryan: May 23, 2006; GOAT

Sometimes you just want to listen to the radio because you're tired of the music you have

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:25

fits my needs: Jan 1, 2011; Grimey Drawer

Kro-Bar posted:

Did cars stop having tape/cd players or MP3 inputs or something? Who listens to the loving radio?

I have NPR on in my car except for when they do their fundraising drives or the weekend because it is the most boring and white "entertainment" programming I have ever heard in my life.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:25

fishmech: Jul 16, 2006; by VideoGames; Salad Prong

Kro-Bar posted:

Did cars stop having tape/cd players or MP3 inputs or something? Who listens to the loving radio?

Literally 245 million people a week listen to the radio in the US. It's the highest amount in raw numbers in history, although not the highest proportionally.
http://www.insideradio.com/radio-s-reach-hits-all-time-high-note/article_be3f028a-3a81-11e5-979b-f7f3a985509e.html

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:26

Crows Turn Off: Jan 7, 2008

Kro-Bar posted:

Did cars stop having tape/cd players or MP3 inputs or something? Who listens to the loving radio?

Around 90% of drivers listen to the radio.

http://www.journalism.org/2016/06/15/audio-fact-sheet/
https://www.statista.com/topics/1330/radio/

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:27

visceril: Feb 24, 2008

The only thing that could potentially kill radio is self-driving cars

And even then it wouldn't just vanish

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:29

Goatman Sacks: Apr 4, 2011; by FactsAreUseless

http://www.politico.com/story/2016/08/bill-clinton-used-tax-dollars-to-subsidize-foundation-private-email-support-teneo-227613

Look at this bullshit story. Bill Clinton got a paycheck from the government for some weird reason who knows and then spent that money on his own poo poo.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:29

hiddenriverninja: May 10, 2013; life is locomotion
keep moving
trust that you'll find your way

visceril posted:

His entire campaign is an oppo research bomb. His entire life has been televised, written about, and tweeted.

Her October surprise could just be a 30 minute loop of him mocking that disabled reporter

I'm assuming that someone leaking his tax returns would be illegal and off the table.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:30

Iron Crowned: May 6, 2003; by Hand Knit

visceril posted:

The only thing that could potentially kill radio is self-driving cars

And even then it wouldn't just vanish

Even if terrestrial broadcast radio did vanish, the word "radio" would probably become a colloquialism for the vehicle's entertainment system.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:31

Luna Was Here: Mar 21, 2013; Lipstick Apathy

I would listen to the radio except in my area there are four radio stations, two of them play country 24/7, one plays Christian rock, one plays jazz and classical in between christian shirt stories about people being saved because they prayed a bunch

Thank god for the invention of the Internet and radio broadcasts being put on it

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:33

Munkeymon: Aug 14, 2003; Motherfucker's got an
armor-piercing crowbar! Rigoddamndicu𝜆ous.

visceril posted:

The only thing that could potentially kill radio is self-driving cars

And even then it wouldn't just vanish

So radio is safe forever, then. That's cool

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:35

Pakled: Aug 6, 2011; WE ARE SMART

I listen to NPR when it's not playing classical music or A Prairie Home Companion.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:39

seiferguy: Jun 9, 2005; FLAWED
INTUITION; Toilet Rascal

My car has bluetooth and Pandora integration, but that makes like a minute to turn my phone onto bluetooth mode and then get Pandora running. For short trips I'm always listening to the radio (though HD feeds usually get priority).

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:40

Iron Crowned: May 6, 2003; by Hand Knit

Pakled posted:

I listen to NPR when it's not playing classical music or A Prairie Home Companion.

I used to listen to A Prairie Home Companion on Sundays when I needed a nap.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:41

fishmech: Jul 16, 2006; by VideoGames; Salad Prong

visceril posted:

The only thing that could potentially kill radio is self-driving cars

And even then it wouldn't just vanish

Yeah it would just get a bit smaller. Like the only sort of media that's really gone away is stuff like say, newsreels and domestic shortwave radio, which only existed because of a very limited-scope confluence of technological and logistic factors.

But even there like, newsreels were still produced for mass distribution in America up to 1967, well past the point that "everyone" could watch TV news.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:41

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

I just bought a car and listened to radio for the 2 days it took for my tape deck adapter to audio jack thing to get here so I can plug my phone in.

Radio's poo poo. How do all these stations get away with making boldface lies about "80 minutes of commercial free music!" right before a 5 minute long commercial break?

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:41

Night10194: Feb 13, 2012; We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

Pakled posted:

I listen to NPR when it's not playing classical music or A Prairie Home Companion.

Garrison Keiler is a goddamn treasure. :colbert:

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:41

Ogmius815: Aug 25, 2005; centrism is a hell of a drug

Pakled posted:

A Prairie Home Companion.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:41

Magres: Jul 14, 2011

WampaLord posted:

I just bought a car and listened to radio for the 2 days it took for my tape deck adapter to audio jack thing to get here so I can plug my phone in.

Radio's poo poo. How do all these stations get away with making boldface lies about "80 minutes of commercial free music!" right before a 5 minute long commercial break?

They're not "commercials" they're "a message from our sponsors" or some stupid horseshit

I agree, radio is bad. I just listen to stuff off my phone

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:42

Alec Bald Snatch: Sep 12, 2012; by exmarx

Night10194 posted:

Garrison Keiler is a goddamn treasure.

garrison keiller should be in a gulag

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:43

Xarthor: Nov 11, 2003; Need Ink or Toner for
Your Printer?
Check out my
Thread in SA-Mart!; Lipstick Apathy

> USPOL Sep: garrison keiller should be in a gulag

I love APHC but Keiller's whistling sound he makes when he says or sings any "s" sound make my wife soooo angry. It's great.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:44

VanSandman: Feb 16, 2011; SWAP.AVI EXCHANGER

Night10194 posted:

Garrison Keiler is a goddamn treasure.

He is highly overrated but easily mockable, I say leave him alone for the unintentional comedy of his existence.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:45

Combed Thunderclap: Jan 4, 2011

William F Cuckley posted:

garrison keiller should be in a gulag

Night10194 posted:

Garrison Keiler is a goddamn treasure.

To this contentious debate, I add Keiller's latest op-ed on Trump.

It's pretty vicious. In a Methodist kind of way. :smuggo:

quote:

The cap does not look good on you, it's a duffer's cap, and when you come to the microphone, you look like the warm-up guy, the guy who announces the license number of the car left in the parking lot, doors locked, lights on, motor running. The brim shadows your face, which gives a sinister look, as if you'd come to town to announce the closing of the pulp factory. Your eyes look dead and your scowl does not suggest American greatness so much as American indigestion. Your hair is the wrong color: People don't want a president to be that shade of blond. You know that now.

Why doesn't someone in your entourage dare to say these things? So sad. The fans in the arenas are wild about you, and Sean Hannity is as loyal as they come, but Rudy and Christie and Newt are reassuring in that stilted way of hospital visitors. And The New York Times treats you like the village idiot. This is painful for a Queens boy trying to win respect in Manhattan where the Times is the Supreme Liberal Jewish Anglican Arbiter of Who Has The Smarts and What Goes Where. When you came to Manhattan 40 years ago, you discovered that in entertainment, the press, politics, finance, everywhere you went, you ran into Jews, and they are not like you: Jews didn't go in for big yachts and a fleet of aircraft � they showed off by way of philanthropy or by raising brilliant offspring. They sympathized with the civil rights movement. In Queens, blacks were a threat to property values � they belonged in the Bronx, not down the street. To the Times, Queens is Cleveland. Bush league. You are Queens. The casinos were totally Queens, the gold faucets in your triplex, the bragging, the insults, but you wanted to be liked by Those People. You wanted Mike Bloomberg to invite you to dinner at his townhouse. You wanted the Times to run a three-part story about you, that you meditate and are a passionate kayaker and collect 14th-century Islamic mosaics. You wish you were that person but you didn't have the time.

Running for president is your last bid for the respect of Manhattan. If you were to win election, they couldn't ridicule you anymore. They could be horrified, but there is nothing ridiculous about being Leader of the Free World. You have B-52 bombers at your command. When you go places, a battalion of security guys comb the environs. You attract really really good speechwriters who give you Churchillian cadences and toss in quotes from Emerson and Aeschylus and Ecclesiastes.

Labor Day and it is not going well. You had a very bad month. You tossed out those wisecracks on Twitter and the Earth shook and your ratings among white suburban women with French cookware declined. The teleprompter is not your friend. You are in the old tradition of locker room ranting and big honkers in the steam room, sitting naked, talking man talk, griping about the goons and ginks and lousy workmanship and the uppity broads and the great lays and how you vanquished your enemies at the bank. Profanity is your natural language and vulgar words so as not to offend the Christers but the fans can still hear it and that's something they love about you. You are their guy. You are losing and so are they but they love you for it.

So what do you do this winter? Hang around one of your mansions? Hit some golf balls? Hire a ghostwriter to do a new autobiography?

What the fans don't know is that it's not much fun being a billionaire. You own a lot of big houses and you wander around in them, followed by a waiter, a bartender, a masseuse, three housekeepers, and a concierge, and they probably gossip about you behind your back. Just like nine-tenths of your campaign staff. You're losing and they know it and they're telling mean stories about you to everybody and his brother.

Meanwhile, you keep plugging away. It's the hardest work you've ever done. You walk out in the white cap and you rant for an hour about stuff that means nothing and the fans scream and wave their signs and you wish you could level with them for once and say one true thing: I love you to death and when this is over I will have nothing that I want.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:47

FactsAreUseless: Feb 16, 2011

I work at a public radio station and every single person in the office hates Prairie Home Companion. Even public radio isn't into it.

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:52

Ogmius815: Aug 25, 2005; centrism is a hell of a drug

You hate A Prairie Home Companion? Who the gently caress are you people?

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:55

Die Sexmonster!: Nov 30, 2005

mandatory lesbian posted:

it's easier to get new stuff to listen to on the radio then looking for it myself

What the gently caress is this? The radio is either playing all the same songs they've played for decades, or Top 40 trash. I don't see room for anything in between, and I've been getting new music from friends/going out and the internet. This is in Seattle. :psyduck:

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:55

DoctorWhat: Nov 18, 2011; A little privacy, please?

Someone post the Bojack horseman guy's blogpost about PHC.

EDIT:

quote:

A Prairie Home Companion is a radio show that is broadcast every weekend on public radio and is then rebroadcast seemingly whenever you turn on your car. It is hosted by an old man named Garrison Keillor and is a recording of a live show performed in his home state of Minnesota and also occasionally in other places. Nobody in history has ever listened to an entire episode front-to-back, but still we can make some educated guesses about the show based on the snippets we’ve heard, like marine biologists who study the recordings of deep distant moans to imagine the lives and loves of the elusive blue whale.

Episodes are like four hours long. That sounds crazy. Maybe they’re not four hours long, but they have to be at least three hours. Long enough that you can be on a long road trip and turn on the radio and go, “Oh man, it’s A Prairie Home Companion,” so then you put a tape in, but then when the tape ends and the radio goes back on, it’s still A Prairie Home Companion.

Every show starts with Garrison Keillor coming out and chatting for a little bit about nothing. The audience in the theater where the show is recorded LOVES this. I think for a lot of people Garrison Keillor feels like a part of the family, and therefore everything he says is adorable. I have never in my life met a person who actually feels this way about Garrison Keillor, but the laughter from the audience in the theater where the show is recorded leads me to believe that SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE must feel this way.

After he’s done chatting, Garrison Keillor sings a song, usually the melody of a pre-existing song but with new lyrics. It’s like a Weird Al song, if Weird Al only wrote parodies of songs at least thirty years old and they were all about doctors and lawyers and college professors. To give you a sense of the kind of songs I’m talking about : I don’t know if Garrison Keillor has ever sung a parody of Gilbert and Sullivan’s I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General with lyrics about contemporary American politics, but also yeah I do know, because he definitely has.

Anyway, the song is cute and fun and you start to think, “yeah, okay, you know what, maybe I do like A Prairie Home Companion,” but then he sings another song, and it’s like, “all right, guy, enough.” Then he sings like eight more songs.

After the songs, I guess there’s like some sketches? One is usually a noir parody about a grizzled private eye. There might be one of these in every show? There’s no way to know for sure. One is usually a sketch about cowboys, where most of the comedy comes from the juxtaposition of cowboy cliches with anachronistic modern life observations. Like maybe one of the cowboys is developing an app? That could be twenty minutes of showtime right there. The cowboy segment is usually brought to you by powder milk biscuits. Is that supposed to be a joke? Or is there an actual powder milk biscuit company that pays to sponsor the segment? Nobody knows. It’s a mystery.

Then there’s like ten or twelve more sketches.

Usually the show has a vaguely topical sketch, so you know that this show was recorded recently, like, this isn’t just an old show NPR had lying around, like, they’re still making this show, in the present. The vaguely topical sketch isn’t reallytopical topical though, it’s more like seasonal. Like in winter there could be a sketch about Christmas, or in the fall, there could be a sketch about going back to school. Back-to-school is a fun topic, because you can make jokes about how wacky youth culture is and also make jokes about the exorbitant price of higher education, and DON’T WORRY, A PRAIRIE HOME COMPANION WILL MAKE THOSE JOKES.

At some point, Garrison Keillor will read a letter from Lake Wobegon, or a letter to Lake Wobegon, or I don’t know, something about Lake Wobegon. If you turn on the radio and you just hear like ten minutes of an old man talking about people he saw in the supermarket, you’re probably at that part of the show.

Then Garrison Keillor reads messages for people in the audience from other people in the audience. Usually, it’s like “Happy Birthday,” or “Happy Anniversary,” but I guess if someone’s car was about to be towed or if they left their lights on, this would be the place in the show where they’d make an announcement about that. I think this segment comes from the time before Facebook or text messaging or maybe even phones, when you couldn’t just tell someone to have a happy birthday, you had to get Garrison Keillor to do it for you.

Also, the show has musical guests! Every episode has like five different bluegrass bands come out at different times and play four songs each. Every song is like eight minutes long, and between each song Garrison Keillor chats with the members of the band for at least fifteen minutes.

Then at the end of the show, another band comes out. This band is probably like three sisters who sing jazz standards together and sometimes gospel. They sing a song, and maybe even do a little sketch, and then Garrison Keillor asks them about how they’re enjoying their time in whatever city the show is recorded in that week. If it’s winter, they all sing a song together about how cold it is. Then the band plays eight more songs, then Garrison Keillor sings a song, then there’s a long story about beans, and then there’s like five more songs.

DoctorWhat fucked around with this message at 19:58 on Sep 1, 2016

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:55

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# ? Jun 4, 2024 22:15

Iron Crowned: May 6, 2003; by Hand Knit

Ogmius815 posted:

You hate A Prairie Home Companion? Who the gently caress are you people?

I don't hate it, but I don't go out of my way for it. It's perfect for Sunday afternoon chill time, or a rainy Saturday night in October

# ? Sep 1, 2016 19:56

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