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Democratic Pirate
Feb 17, 2010

“I sent a real good email, that merits a .10% raise starting next week.”

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Dik Hz
Feb 22, 2004

Fun with Science

KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:

im the 2.3% inflation per year
I really want to make a dick joke here but I can't quite make it work.

SpelledBackwards
Jan 7, 2001

I found this image on the Internet, perhaps you've heard of it? It's been around for a while I hear.

Democratic Pirate posted:

“I sent a real good email, that merits a .10% raise starting next week.”

It's quite simple, really. If you follow Brian Tracy's method of improving on yourself just 1% today over yesterday, each day for a year, then your employer will have no choice but to agree that for next year you should get a +3678% raise.

Shats Basoon
Jun 13, 2013

In January I was offered a job with a 10% pay increase which I was able to negotiate up to a 20% increase (thanks to this thread). After accepting the job at the end of January, I was given a tentative start date of 03/01 but I was required to go through a drug screen and background check which took significantly longer than I was told. It finally completed a few days ago and I was able to extend the start date to 03/08.

Today, my current organization announced our yearly bonuses which would be around 5% of my current salary and will be paid out at the end of March, probably 03/26. I have to be employed with them on the date the payment is made to receive the bonus. I'd like to try to get this bonus if possible. I think I missed the boat as far as asking the new company to cover it in the form of a hiring bonus or something. So, I think my only options are to ask to push the start date out until April and give notice after the bonus is paid or give notice this week and ask my current boss if she would allow me to work through the bonus payout day, provided the new employer is ok with it.

Is it going to piss my new employer off to ask to push the start date to be delayed that long? Trying to decide if it is worth asking

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


You're risking a 20% ongoing increase for a 5% one-time payout. I don't think it'd be *that* risky to ask but after being delayed for so long it's definitely going to raise some eyebrows. I think your situation should be filed under, 'know when you've won' and just take the L. Keep in mind that if your background/drug test went through on time you probably wouldn't have even known about this bonus.

Shats Basoon
Jun 13, 2013

PIZZA.BAT posted:

You're risking a 20% ongoing increase for a 5% one-time payout. I don't think it'd be *that* risky to ask but after being delayed for so long it's definitely going to raise some eyebrows. I think your situation should be filed under, 'know when you've won' and just take the L. Keep in mind that if your background/drug test went through on time you probably wouldn't have even known about this bonus.

yeah if everything had went timely my last day would have been today hah. I knew when the bonus would be. The current org announced across the board hiring freezes at the end of 2020 so I thought the bonus would not be fully funded if it was provided at all. I think i'm inclined to agree with you, I don't really want to stay at this job another 1.5-2 months.

Dik Hz
Feb 22, 2004

Fun with Science

Shats Basoon posted:

In January I was offered a job with a 10% pay increase which I was able to negotiate up to a 20% increase (thanks to this thread). After accepting the job at the end of January, I was given a tentative start date of 03/01 but I was required to go through a drug screen and background check which took significantly longer than I was told. It finally completed a few days ago and I was able to extend the start date to 03/08.

Today, my current organization announced our yearly bonuses which would be around 5% of my current salary and will be paid out at the end of March, probably 03/26. I have to be employed with them on the date the payment is made to receive the bonus. I'd like to try to get this bonus if possible. I think I missed the boat as far as asking the new company to cover it in the form of a hiring bonus or something. So, I think my only options are to ask to push the start date out until April and give notice after the bonus is paid or give notice this week and ask my current boss if she would allow me to work through the bonus payout day, provided the new employer is ok with it.

Is it going to piss my new employer off to ask to push the start date to be delayed that long? Trying to decide if it is worth asking
If I was the new hiring manager, I'd have extreme side-eye to the point of questioning my new hire's professionalism if they pulled this stunt on me and I found out about it. Also, your old company will have some side-eye as well and question if you were just phoning it in for the past several months.

Also, keep in mind that every day the job remains open without a body in the role is a day that an exec can look at the position and eliminate it without any fuss. Empty roles are always the first casualties in layoffs.

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


Another thing to keep in mind is your opportunity cost. Two months at 20% higher salary comes out to 3%. So in reality you're not leaving 5% of your salary behind, it's 2%. So try to focus on that number instead and ask if it'd be worth the headache you'd be setting yourself up for.

spwrozek
Sep 4, 2006

Sail when it's windy

Shats Basoon posted:

In January I was offered a job with a 10% pay increase which I was able to negotiate up to a 20% increase (thanks to this thread). After accepting the job at the end of January, I was given a tentative start date of 03/01 but I was required to go through a drug screen and background check which took significantly longer than I was told. It finally completed a few days ago and I was able to extend the start date to 03/08.

Today, my current organization announced our yearly bonuses which would be around 5% of my current salary and will be paid out at the end of March, probably 03/26. I have to be employed with them on the date the payment is made to receive the bonus. I'd like to try to get this bonus if possible. I think I missed the boat as far as asking the new company to cover it in the form of a hiring bonus or something. So, I think my only options are to ask to push the start date out until April and give notice after the bonus is paid or give notice this week and ask my current boss if she would allow me to work through the bonus payout day, provided the new employer is ok with it.

Is it going to piss my new employer off to ask to push the start date to be delayed that long? Trying to decide if it is worth asking

Enjoy starting your new job on 3/8 and move on with life.

Guinness
Sep 15, 2004

Echoing the sentiment to just take the L on the bonus and move on. It wasn't part of your decision-making process when you took the new job, and it's too risky to try to finangle the situation for only a 5% bonus. That's really just not that much money in the big picture.

With a 20% pay raise you'll forget about a 5% bonus really quickly, not to mention it sounds like you hate your current job.

fourwood
Sep 9, 2001

Damn I'll bring them to their knees.

PIZZA.BAT posted:

Another thing to keep in mind is your opportunity cost. Two months at 20% higher salary comes out to 3%. So in reality you're not leaving 5% of your salary behind, it's 2%. So try to focus on that number instead and ask if it'd be worth the headache you'd be setting yourself up for.
I feel like this math really makes it click. It’s not even a 5% bonus given the opportunity cost on straight money, not to mention the risk/hassle of delaying your start with the new employer and whatever stress you’re incurring at your current one.

Jordan7hm
Feb 17, 2011




Lipstick Apathy

Dik Hz posted:

If I was the new hiring manager, I'd have extreme side-eye to the point of questioning my new hire's professionalism if they pulled this stunt on me and I found out about it. Also, your old company will have some side-eye as well and question if you were just phoning it in for the past several months.

Also, keep in mind that every day the job remains open without a body in the role is a day that an exec can look at the position and eliminate it without any fuss. Empty roles are always the first casualties in layoffs.
who cares, leaving after your bonus gets paid is SOP

but I agree for the difference here it doesn't matter and you should leave at earliest opportunity

KYOON GRIFFEY JR
Apr 12, 2010



Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22
are there industries where people don't expect their malcontents or voluntary leavers to phone it in until bonus day?

Dik Hz
Feb 22, 2004

Fun with Science

Jordan7hm posted:

who cares, leaving after your bonus gets paid is SOP
Totally agree. That bolded comment was specific to this particular situation. An unscheduled or unexpected bonus is a little different than a planned yearly bonus in this situation, imo.

Shats Basoon
Jun 13, 2013

I went ahead and put in notice at my current job. My current manager is actually a really great lady & boss so when I told her she actually encouraged me to try to work until the bonus is paid out if I could. I was more concerned with starting off on the wrong foot at the new job. If the bonus was paid out a few weeks earlier I'd give it a shot but I think i'll just let it be. Thanks for the advice thread.

Shats Basoon fucked around with this message at 21:25 on Feb 17, 2021

Dik Hz
Feb 22, 2004

Fun with Science

Shats Basoon posted:

I went ahead and put in notice at my current job. My current manager is actually a really great lady & boss so when I told her she actually encouraged me to try to work until the bonus is paid out if I could. I was more concerned with starting off on the wrong foot at the new job. If the bonus was paid out a few weeks earlier I'd give it a shot but I think i'll just let it be.
It still goes in the win column, though. Congrats!

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


Shats Basoon posted:

I went ahead and put in notice at my current job. My current manager is actually a really great lady & boss so when I told her she actually encouraged me to try to work until the bonus is paid out if I could. I was more concerned with starting off on the wrong foot at the new job. If the bonus was paid out a few weeks earlier I'd give it a shot but I think i'll just let it be.

Grats on having a cool boss. I was in the same situation when I jumped at the end of next year but got lucky in that my bonus & 401k match fell within my window. My boss made sure my last day would put me in the window necessary to get them. However if I was in your position I would have done the same thing.

TheParadigm
Dec 10, 2009

Shats Basoon posted:

I went ahead and put in notice at my current job. My current manager is actually a really great lady & boss so when I told her she actually encouraged me to try to work until the bonus is paid out if I could. I was more concerned with starting off on the wrong foot at the new job. If the bonus was paid out a few weeks earlier I'd give it a shot but I think i'll just let it be. Thanks for the advice thread.

If your boss seems cool and open to it - try arranging your final few weeks with your saved up vacation time so that you're on the books but not at work when bonus day +1 rolls around.

Shats Basoon
Jun 13, 2013

TheParadigm posted:

If your boss seems cool and open to it - try arranging your final few weeks with your saved up vacation time so that you're on the books but not at work when bonus day +1 rolls around.

I only have 1 day banked haha. We are only allowed to rollover 5 days and I rarely did.

Ham Equity
Apr 16, 2013

The first thing we do, let's kill all the cars.
Grimey Drawer

TheParadigm posted:

If your boss seems cool and open to it - try arranging your final few weeks with your saved up vacation time so that you're on the books but not at work when bonus day +1 rolls around.

Usually bonus policies like that require you to actually be working the final day/week, not just on the payroll.

LochNessMonster
Feb 3, 2005

I need about three fitty


Take a few weeks of unpaid leave, come back for the final day (which you take off at the new job).

Or if old job is remote, don’t quit and just phone it in while focussing on your new job.

BabyFur Denny
Mar 18, 2003
That's a lot of risk of losing your new job for basically two weeks of salary

bamhand
Apr 15, 2010
My sister's boyfriend is a fresh college grad who got an offer at a consulting company. They have offices in NYC and Chicago, he asked me how to phrase a letter saying he would really, really, prefer to be in NY (where they have few openings) but would take a position in Chicago (where they have a bunch of openings). My assessment was no matter how he phrased it, they wouldn't care and would not give him any special preference for NY. His best option was to say he would accept an NYC role but would need to additional time to consider other offers if given Chicago. Am I missing anything here?

KYOON GRIFFEY JR
Apr 12, 2010



Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22
yeah, probably the fact that he's a fresh college grad at a consulting firm. where his office is located is immaterial. as soon as covid restrictions lift he's gonna be M-R in West Point GA or Dickinson ND or whatever. him spending effort on this is not useful to his career. one of the first lessons as a junior consultant is that what you want does not matter at all and if he can't comprehend that right now he is going to have a rough go of it.

edit: unless he actually thinks he's gonna decline the offer, which is fine? but he better be prepared for them to call him on that

edit2: more useful advice - what does it actually say in his offer letter about location?

bamhand
Apr 15, 2010
Yeah I told him to talk it over with my sister but his choices are mostly likely take Chicago, or ask for NYC only but be prepared for a rejection.

Not sure what his offer letter is or if he's got one. They just asked to do a quick call this afternoon because the recruiter agave him a until end of the day to respond.

Cactus Ghost
Dec 20, 2003

you can actually inflate your scrote pretty safely with sterile saline, syringes, needles, and aseptic technique. its a niche kink iirc

the saline just slowly gets absorbed into your blood but in the meantime you got a big round smooth distended nutsack

i read the entire op and it has been a powerful affirmation of my suspcion that office workers live in an entirely different world than the rest of us

Xguard86
Nov 22, 2004

"You don't understand his pain. Everywhere he goes he sees women working, wearing pants, speaking in gatherings, voting. Surely they will burn in the white hot flames of Hell"

bamhand posted:

Yeah I told him to talk it over with my sister but his choices are mostly likely take Chicago, or ask for NYC only but be prepared for a rejection.

Not sure what his offer letter is or if he's got one. They just asked to do a quick call this afternoon because the recruiter agave him a until end of the day to respond.

Often there's a list of cities and firms are ambivalent where you live in that list. Open roles are posted tied to a geo but internally it doesn't matter. Sometimes it does, but not always clear on the outside.

Just wondering if he has explicitly confirmed there's a difference between nyc and chicago or is inferring it.

+1 to the guy who said it's also not going to matter because they'll pack your rear end into a plane to wherever lol.

bamhand
Apr 15, 2010
Yeah he specifically said there are few openings and lots of candidates for NY and vice versa for Chicago. My sister lives in NY with him so they want to stay there.

Dik Hz
Feb 22, 2004

Fun with Science

OMGVBFLOL posted:

i read the entire op and it has been a powerful affirmation of my suspcion that office workers live in an entirely different world than the rest of us
Who is "the rest of us" to you? A lot of the stuff in this thread applies to any negotiation. But the group of people that post about career stuff on a dead comedy forum tend to skew towards computer touchers.

Betazoid
Aug 3, 2010

Hallo. Ik ben een leeuw.

Dik Hz posted:

Who is "the rest of us" to you? A lot of the stuff in this thread applies to any negotiation. But the group of people that post about career stuff on a dead comedy forum tend to skew towards computer touchers.

Guessing manual labor or service industry.

I'm not a computer toucher (just a garbage office drone) and I love this thread.

Ham Equity
Apr 16, 2013

The first thing we do, let's kill all the cars.
Grimey Drawer

OMGVBFLOL posted:

i read the entire op and it has been a powerful affirmation of my suspcion that office workers live in an entirely different world than the rest of us
One of my good friends moved out to where I live on a bit of a whim, and I moved into an apartment with him. He worked in food service previously, and I referred him to a job in the call center of the financial institution I work at. The first holiday season rolls around, and he asks me "so, how does this work? When do we get a chance to ask for Thanksgiving off?" I had to explain to him why they're called "bankers' holidays."

We really, really do, and it is profoundly unfair. The vast majority of people working in hospitality or doing manual labor work way harder than us.

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


bamhand posted:

My sister's boyfriend is a fresh college grad who got an offer at a consulting company. They have offices in NYC and Chicago, he asked me how to phrase a letter saying he would really, really, prefer to be in NY (where they have few openings) but would take a position in Chicago (where they have a bunch of openings). My assessment was no matter how he phrased it, they wouldn't care and would not give him any special preference for NY. His best option was to say he would accept an NYC role but would need to additional time to consider other offers if given Chicago. Am I missing anything here?

Is there an important reason he's preferring NYC over Chicago? I ask because like KYOON GRIFFEY JR noted as soon as covid is over his rear end is going to be living in hotels and airports and regularly flying into and out of Chicago will probably be WAY less of a pain in the rear end than New York. This may be something to talk about in the business travel thread though

skipdogg
Nov 29, 2004
Resident SRT-4 Expert

PIZZA.BAT posted:

Is there an important reason he's preferring NYC over Chicago? I ask because like KYOON GRIFFEY JR noted as soon as covid is over his rear end is going to be living in hotels and airports and regularly flying into and out of Chicago will probably be WAY less of a pain in the rear end than New York. This may be something to talk about in the business travel thread though

This was my thinking as well, but I'm totally ignorant about the cities, travel consulting, or pretty much anything. Chicago seems like a much better base to fly in/out of every week than the NYC area. I can see the appeal of NYC to a young 20 something just graduating college though

Thanatosian posted:

One of my good friends moved out to where I live on a bit of a whim, and I moved into an apartment with him. He worked in food service previously, and I referred him to a job in the call center of the financial institution I work at. The first holiday season rolls around, and he asks me "so, how does this work? When do we get a chance to ask for Thanksgiving off?" I had to explain to him why they're called "bankers' holidays."

We really, really do, and it is profoundly unfair. The vast majority of people working in hospitality or doing manual labor work way harder than us.

It really is. I worked food service and from 16 to 21(fast food and waiting tables/line cooking), and then a 24/7 call center for another 3 years after that before I moved to the cushy corporate side of things. It's very common for me to take the entire last 3 weeks of the year off and get paid for it. Vacation when I was younger meant loss of income. Now I get paid 33 or so days a year to not work. I worked 10 times harder line cooking at Denny's than I do right now. Obviously the skill set is different, but drat I feel fortunate as hell to be in the position I'm in these days.

Ultimate Mango
Jan 18, 2005

Just like Guateau says “anyone can cook”, “everyone can (and should) negotiate”

This thread isn’t JUST for computer touches or manual laborers or lawyers. It’s for everyone.

Eric the Mauve
May 8, 2012

Making you happy for a buck since 199X
There is no negotiating anything in retail wage slave jobs.

spwrozek
Sep 4, 2006

Sail when it's windy

PIZZA.BAT posted:

Is there an important reason he's preferring NYC over Chicago? I ask because like KYOON GRIFFEY JR noted as soon as covid is over his rear end is going to be living in hotels and airports and regularly flying into and out of Chicago will probably be WAY less of a pain in the rear end than New York. This may be something to talk about in the business travel thread though


bamhand posted:

Yeah he specifically said there are few openings and lots of candidates for NY and vice versa for Chicago. My sister lives in NY with him so they want to stay there.

Pretty good reason I think.

Moleboy
Apr 20, 2011

Looksy
-Hindsight-

Looking Back, I am sure of 2 things:
1. I should have found the thread before it finished
2. Grimper may have actually done one or two things wrong
I just wanted to pipe in to say that knowing what your skillset and job is worth is massively important.

I had been working for a company for 7 years, had moved up massively in that time (Started at 27k/year and ended up at 85k/year), but also knew that I was still being massively underpaid for my skillset and role. The company "prided" itself on "hiring for attitude, training for skill", so while they did offer a lot of training (most of it internal only, but you could sometimes finagle actual certificate programs) they did so in order to keep payroll down.

I currently work as a Scrum Master and was negotiating with my then boss looking for ~10k raise to match a headhunter offer I had gotten a few years before that I had decided not to take for various reasons, and was getting a ton of pushback, as well as heavy pushback on getting them to cover a certification I was missing.

Ultimately, I made the decision to pay for the training myself because I knew that the going rate for Scrum Masters in my area was usually 120k - 160k based on experience.

After getting the certification I was able to hire on with a consulting company as a "senior consultant" (but really still just being a scrum master with a fancier title), and they didn't bat an eye when I asked for 140k/year total compensation.

Knowing what you are worth in your market can be a massive and sticking to that when looking elsewhere can be huge, and led to me getting a 65% raise.

Also, never trust that your company, as much as they tell you that they are "taking care of you", actually are.

KYOON GRIFFEY JR
Apr 12, 2010



Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

PIZZA.BAT posted:

Is there an important reason he's preferring NYC over Chicago? I ask because like KYOON GRIFFEY JR noted as soon as covid is over his rear end is going to be living in hotels and airports and regularly flying into and out of Chicago will probably be WAY less of a pain in the rear end than New York. This may be something to talk about in the business travel thread though

on the contrary flying in and out of chicago sucks mega rear end but it's probably not worse than NY

81sidewinder
Sep 8, 2014

Buying stocks on the day of the crash

Eric the Mauve posted:

There is no negotiating anything in retail wage slave jobs.

Can't agree here. This thread still has a ton to offer for everyone who works for a living, and often goes beyond the small scope of negotiating that contains the discussion salary and benefits.

Some facets of negotiation are even more relevant to people in retail or entry level food service. Being aware of market rates, being cognizant of your BATNA and treating a job like a mercenary are arguably even more important in those jobs.

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Eric the Mauve
May 8, 2012

Making you happy for a buck since 199X
Have you ever actually worked in that sector? If you're lucky you might be able to get yourself $10 an hour instead of $9.50. That's about it. If you have personal knowledge of any negotiation success story more meaningful than that, please share.

The only things that are even slightly negotiable besides maybe a few pennies per hour are scheduling (i.e. "I can't work on Tuesdays" or "I can only work after 3PM" or "no more than 6 consecutive days without a day off" or "just a heads up, I'll be in another state over Thanksgiving so I can't work then") but you usually have to fill in your available hours when you fill out an application and if what you put on there doesn't suit them they won't call you.

Approaching your job in a mercenary frame of mind is just as important there as anywhere else, yes. But when you get a line-drone job offer in retail, warehousing, foodservice, call centers, etc., there is no room for meaningful negotiation. And management in that world is far more willing to just lie to you than they are in the white collar world, amazing as that may seem.

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