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Jakabite posted:No, 'EVERYONE' didn't cotton on. Everyone who reads a nerdy message board for fans of ASOIAF who re-read it regularly. cottoned on. I doubt Average Joe cottoned on. That's exactly what I said. That whole sentence was sarcasm.
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Nov 1, 2011 23:04
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No one brings up Bran's two chapter escapade with Benjen "Cockhands" Stark and friends because it sucked. The Bloodraven reveal is stupid as gently caress. Maybe someone cares about dunkin omelette or whatever the the gently caress it was but I don't. It also ties into the WORLDBUILDING bullshit about a couple of whores' saggy tits and I can't forgive GRRM for that one. Bran has sucked since he fell of the wall. Arya's ADWD chapters were cool though.
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Nov 1, 2011 23:45
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Edit: Sorry for the double post, my phone is apparently not optimized for jack poo poo.
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Nov 1, 2011 23:45
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bigmcgaffney posted:No one brings up Bran's two chapter escapade with Benjen "Cockhands" Stark and friends because it sucked. The Bloodraven reveal is stupid as gently caress. Maybe someone cares about dunkin omelette or whatever the the gently caress it was but I don't. It also ties into the WORLDBUILDING bullshit about a couple of whores' saggy tits and I can't forgive GRRM for that one. Bran has been consistently boring as gently caress since book 1. However, I actually liked his two chapters in ADWD because the children of the forest were pretty interesting and now we can get more explanations into what the Others are.
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Nov 1, 2011 23:50
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Dany purged herself of the Mereen cesspool by having it run down her legs mixed with copious amounts of blood. Very Shawshank-esque imho. Between that and her love of feeling Daario's gigantic moustachio stiffening against her palm the Gurm has got me all aquiver for her next segments 
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Nov 1, 2011 23:54
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Azure_Horizon posted:That's exactly what I said. That whole sentence was sarcasm. Oh loving hell. Sorry. Clearly I'm a moron.
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Nov 2, 2011 00:04
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VaultAggie posted:Bran has been consistently boring as gently caress since book 1. However, I actually liked his two chapters in ADWD because the children of the forest were pretty interesting and now we can get more explanations into what the Others are. Same here. Also, the cold realization that all that will become of him, all that he can look forward to, is basically being turned into a psychic tree for thousands of years or whatever was fairly creepy. The setting of the cavern is very atmospherically similar to GRRM's story In the House of the White Worm which he wrote in 1976 and I read several times in the early 90's (as part of the Sandkings Anthology - the whole anthology is good) because I loved the atmosphere of it so much. So yeah, ADWD definitely had some of the best Bran chapters ever, IMO. HoAssHo fucked around with this message at 00:23 on Nov 2, 2011 |
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Nov 2, 2011 00:21
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SammyWhereAreYou posted:So yeah, ADWD definitely had some of the best Bran chapters ever,
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Nov 2, 2011 00:30
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Kekekela posted:This is probably a true statement but I'd consider it damning with faint praise. The best poo poo sandwich I ever had.
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Nov 2, 2011 00:52
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:Yeah, I don't particularly like reading all the books in a series over again when a new book comes out. That's impractical as hell for something with brief books, nevermind skull-crushing tomes. I have better things to do than read the same book over and over every few years just to refresh myself. The good news is that you won't need to do another re-read for at least 5 years and that will probably be the last re-read that you'll ever have to do for this series
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Nov 2, 2011 01:04
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Maybe I just hate young Stark children but every Bran or Arya chapter in every book bores me to tears.
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Nov 2, 2011 01:07
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Kekekela posted:This is probably a true statement but I'd consider it damning with faint praise. Well, sure. It's still Bran. I wonder about how the show influences the readers though. Pretty sure the cute, competent-for-a-child-actor version of Bran has colored some of our opinions of the character.
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Nov 2, 2011 01:08
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Ross posted:Maybe I just hate young Stark children but every Bran or Arya chapter in every book bores me to tears. I like how Gurm forgot Rickon exists.
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Nov 2, 2011 01:22
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IRQ posted:I like how Gurm forgot Rickon exists. True but he never really did much when he did exist anyway.
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Nov 2, 2011 01:27
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IRQ posted:I like how Gurm forgot Rickon exists. Also the other kid... Sansa? It would have been nice to have at least one chapter so we could get more Little Finger.
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Nov 2, 2011 01:37
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smarion2 posted:Also the other kid... Sansa? It would have been nice to have at least one chapter so we could get more Little Finger. The whole "split the characters into two books" thing was such a terrible idea.
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Nov 2, 2011 01:55
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Ross posted:The whole "split the characters into two books" thing was such a terrible idea. The fact it took him so long and the quality of what came from it does concern me for the next two books. It seems that he really had no clue what he was going to write about. I really do hope this was all just a build up to an amazing ending but we'll just have to wait and see.
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Nov 2, 2011 02:11
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smarion2 posted:Seriously, if he just took the highlights of aFFC and aDwD and made it one book the size of feast it would be pretty good. You got the right idea here. These lackluster volumes are just bridges to the last two books. I mean think about it, the guy is 63 years old, he knows full well that TWOW and ADOS are going to be the LAST things he ever does that anyone will give a poo poo about. The last two books should curtail much of the things people hated about AFFC/ADWD by localizing all the characters toward each other and ending this series-long episodic POV poo poo with some semblance of a consolidated plot.
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Nov 2, 2011 02:57
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Jakabite posted:Oh loving hell. Sorry. Clearly I'm a moron. It's okay. Apparently I'm the lowest of the low for enjoying AFFC/ADWD a fuckton. So you're probably smart in comparison.
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Nov 2, 2011 03:11
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Azure_Horizon posted:It's okay. Apparently I'm the lowest of the low for enjoying AFFC/ADWD a fuckton. I was willing to believe you weren't trolling up until now.
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Nov 2, 2011 03:15
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IRQ posted:I was willing to believe you weren't trolling up until now. Here begins the echo chamber Azure_Horizon fucked around with this message at 03:21 on Nov 2, 2011 |
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Nov 2, 2011 03:16
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I don't care that you enjoyed the books. A lot of people do and for good reasons. Just don't try to derail every discussion with your  declarations.
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Nov 2, 2011 03:46
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I can't wait for Rickon to come riding Shaggydog with Lady to save the day.
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Nov 2, 2011 04:00
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Paperback Writer posted:I can't wait for Rickon to come riding Shaggydog with Lady to save the day. Is this after Davos goes to retrieve him from Skagos and Rickon's clan take his remaining fingers and makes him eat "onion soup" before he is trusted?
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Nov 2, 2011 04:21
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Paperback Writer posted:I can't wait for Rickon to come riding Shaggydog with Lady to save the day. We may joke about a lot of things here, but I think beastiality is crossing the line, sorry.
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Nov 2, 2011 05:02
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There is a low "things happening" to "page count" ratio in AFFC and ADWD. Whereas the first three novels felt very dense and exciting, the most recent two feel bloated and somewhat boring. I feel A Feast For Crows and A Dance With Dragons would be more enjoyable reads if they were edited and combined into one book called A Feast For Crows.
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Nov 2, 2011 05:13
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:We may joke about a lot of things here, but I think beastiality is crossing the line, sorry. Don't be a Jeyne. 
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Nov 2, 2011 05:15
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Paperback Writer posted:I can't wait for Rickon to come riding Shaggydog with Lady to save the day. Lady's dead.
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Nov 2, 2011 05:40
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VaultAggie posted:However, I actually liked his two chapters in ADWD because the children of the forest were pretty interesting As someone who loathes 99% of fantasy, I was really really disappointed that Gurm has decided to do a standard copy-paste High Elf race in the middle of an otherwise relatively grounded series. Wow, they're forest-dwellers with long lifespans (yet are almost gone from the world) and are aiding humans in their struggle against the Big Evil? Please do go on *yawn*.
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Nov 2, 2011 06:02
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Smiling Jack posted:Lady's dead. You just had to point out the necrophilia aspect to that statement, didn't you, you sick gently caress.
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Nov 2, 2011 07:17
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My enjoyment of the books is inversely proportional to the amount of magic and other races in it. ... although proportional to the amount of bloody poo poo coming out of characters, so I guess you could say I'm apathetic at this point.
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Nov 2, 2011 07:29
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TheSleeper posted:You just had to point out the necrophilia aspect to that statement, didn't you, you sick gently caress. ... lemoncakes?
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Nov 2, 2011 07:40
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As no character has set foot on Skagos in generations is it possibly the whole "never go there, that be cannibal country" is more a real myth and just serves to isolate Skagos as the people there are the smartest people in the entire seven kingdoms realising that by making them into being feared by all no one will loving bother them?
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Nov 2, 2011 08:39
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Lid posted:As no character has set foot on Skagos in generations is it possibly the whole "never go there, that be cannibal country" is more a real myth and just serves to isolate Skagos as the people there are the smartest people in the entire seven kingdoms realising that by making them into being feared by all no one will loving bother them? It will turn out that GURM lives on Skagos, and when we get Osha's POV where Shaggy-dog tears out his throat, the book will stop right there and the next two thirds will just be empty, blank pages. At the end will be the words 'gently caress you.' in 12 point Comic Sans MS.
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Nov 2, 2011 09:20
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Lid posted:As no character has set foot on Skagos in generations is it possibly the whole "never go there, that be cannibal country" is more a real myth and just serves to isolate Skagos as the people there are the smartest people in the entire seven kingdoms realising that by making them into being feared by all no one will loving bother them? I could see this happening, but unfortunately we won't find out any time soon! Skagos, Land of Scholars and Gentleman, where rape is completely unheard of.
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Nov 2, 2011 09:27
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bigmcgaffney posted:I could see this happening, but unfortunately we won't find out any time soon! It just seems a bit odd to be terrified of Skagos as you have the mountain clans (who will kill you and cut off your limbs smiling afterwards or vice versa) or the iron islands (who will rape like nothing else) or the Mountain or the Wildings or the... actually every single group in the entire books are monsters in one way or another. The only difference is that everyone, EVERYONE, refuses to go near Skagos because they are cannibals. That doesn't mean they are masters of war and the greatest army the world has never seen, they just supposedly eat you after they're done. It sounds like a front and a really good one at that to be the most feared area in a world where every area is death and rape.
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Nov 2, 2011 09:51
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Lid posted:It just seems a bit odd to be terrified of Skagos as you have the mountain clans (who will kill you and cut off your limbs smiling afterwards or vice versa) or the iron islands (who will rape like nothing else) or the Mountain or the Wildings or the... actually every single group in the entire books are monsters in one way or another. The only difference is that everyone, EVERYONE, refuses to go near Skagos because they are cannibals. That doesn't mean they are masters of war and the greatest army the world has never seen, they just supposedly eat you after they're done. It sounds like a front and a really good one at that to be the most feared area in a world where every area is death and rape. Oh god, don't go making me look forward to book that won't be released for at least five years.
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Nov 2, 2011 14:09
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I wonder what they'll end up doing with Nymeria and her pack of killer wolves? Arya leading a wolf army against the Others/Lannisters seems a little too obvious.
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Nov 2, 2011 14:41
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A Harry Potter Slashfic of Ice and Fire Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Lighly flour bread board and rolling pin. Roll dough to 13 x 17 inch triangle, 1/8 inch thick. Transfer to cookie sheet. Prick dough with fork. Cover with another cookie sheet. Bake for 5 minutes. Remove top sheet and continue to bake for 5 more minutes or until lightly browned. Cool on wire rack. Cut pastry into thirds, lengthwise. Mix powdered sugar and water. Stir until smooth. Turn over 1 pastry strip on rack. Pour sugar glaze over strip. Smooth with spatula. Quickly pour stripes of chocolate over glaze. Drag knife over top to make decorative design. Let stand until dry, about 30 minutes. To assemble: Place one unglazed strip on serving platter. Spread half of pastry cream on top. Top with the other unglazed strip. Top with rest of pastry cream. Top that with glazed strip. Chill until firm, about and hour. (Don't chill longer than 3 hours. It may get soggy.) For serving, rape Hermione and cut with serrated knife.
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Nov 2, 2011 16:55
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bigmcgaffney posted:I could see this happening, but unfortunately we won't find out any time soon! It's also got uuuuunicoooooorns!
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Nov 2, 2011 18:15
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