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Renegret posted:I'm still waiting on my "Yearly Compensation Meeting" where they talk about my raise. That was supposed to happen two weeks ago. I think you mean your "Whenver-they-get-to-it Compensation Lecture" where they talk about the raise you won't get because budgets are just really tight, you know? Good work this year, though. I mean you really knocked it out of the park. I think. To be honest I never actually read your yearly goals that I forced you to submit by that deadline but Carol says you looked kind of busy. You did come in 15 past 8 that one day though so you get a 4/5 with no raise. Higgy fucked around with this message at 23:15 on Mar 31, 2014 |
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Mar 31, 2014 23:13
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Higgy posted:I think you mean your "Whenver-they-get-to-it Compensation Lecture" where they talk about the raise you won't get because budgets are just really tight, you know? Good work this year, though. I mean you really knocked it out of the park. I think. To be honest I never actually read your yearly goals that I forced you to submit by that deadline but Carol says you looked kind of busy. You did come in 15 past 8 that one day though so you get a 4/5 with no raise. This is a Fortune 500 company though, so that E-Mail came out to HR with an undertone of "Hey Management, this is what you have to do or I swear to god I will go after you." The nice part about HR here is that, yes they're here to protect the company, but what that means is if my management fails to do anything by the books they release the hounds on them to cover the company's rear end as a whole. It's a relatively small department so it tends to be more lax than say, the call center or sales. I'll get my raise. I'll get something because it's been promised by HR. I don't care if I get my meeting or not, as long as I get the money. What will probably happen is that it'll just magically appear on my paycheck one day and that's how I'll find out. That's how I found out I was getting a Christmas Bonus. Checked my pay stub and woah, where'd that extra week's pay come from? Plus I already got my yearly review, great job, you knocked it out of the park, we have no complains, by the way Mr. Director said not to give anybody a score other than completely average down the board so you got rated average. HR envisioned two meetings, one for "personal development" and the other for money so that money doesn't get in the way of growth, but nobody gives a gently caress about any of that. e: And I know HR goes after our management a lot. Last week was "Hey Renegret, can you update your timesheet every day because that bitch at HR is bothering me again to make sure it gets done every day. She nags me more than my ex wife." You'd think we work in a warehouse the way we talk. Renegret fucked around with this message at 01:05 on Apr 1, 2014 |
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Apr 1, 2014 01:02
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Haha, good luck. Just had my annual review, "Outstanding" review, 2 outta 5 (virtually everyone gets a 3), you assist like 5 other loving teams full of worthless bums, you volunteered to host our boring rear end monthly department meetings so for no extra pay you get to speak in front of 300 peers and management and try to funny while presenting the most dull poo poo ever. Hell everything is perfect except watch your language, I've heard you curse a few times (cursing incompetence).....here's a 3% raise and $1500 bonus, congrats.  This is an international fortune 100 company. I need to run to one of our competitors who are hiring some of our average employees at 10K more per year. How does one jump ahead of the masses? I'm great at my job (and every past job) and everyone sees it but I'm still surrounded by people who do 1/5 as much for the same or slightly lesser pay. They'd rather me quit then for them to actually force other people to work. It breeds an environment where the good employees leave and the moochers stay forever.
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Apr 1, 2014 03:19
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tesilential posted:How does one jump ahead of the masses? I'm great at my job (and every past job) and everyone sees it but I'm still surrounded by people who do 1/5 as much for the same or slightly lesser pay. tesilential posted:They'd rather me quit then for them to actually force other people to work. It breeds an environment where the good employees leave and the moochers stay forever. So a few months back we had appraisal meetings and everyone was ranked. Last Friday, a few minutes before the weekend, the message came that in this global economy it was recommended that some regions would have no raise at all, this included the one I am in. Then a second email came with my personal compensation details. quote:We have reviewed your compensation. Based on the review, we recommend no changes to your compensation at this Sucking up to management would have made no difference, apply suction only when effective. So yeah, if I want a raise it is time change jobs so let's see who is hiring.
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Apr 1, 2014 09:58
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We're actually about to start Q1 reviews in my company. Given the way we're ranked and the months of cross-team sniping and preparation required to secure an above-average rating, these review sessions are starting to resemble a corporate version of the Hunger Games. I give it a few years before we're all literally slaughtering each other in the atrium at the end of each quarter.
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Apr 1, 2014 11:38
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I got stellar reviews too, no raise and a bonus that's less than one month's rent. (My rent is $850.) Working 12 hour days has made me extremely loving impatient in my non work life. I can't waste a half hour doing X! After commuting I only have 3.5 hours to do poo poo and that includes chores and personal hygiene. I'm thinking about letting those slide so maybe I can relax a little.
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Apr 1, 2014 13:52
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Just wrapped up a great 2013 review. "HR said to give you a 2/4 because that's what everyone gets the year after a promotion but you did awesome, 3/4". Unfortunately we had 500 layoffs a month ago, so raises are delayed until July 1 and I'm certain they will be poo poo. Good thing incentive compensation for managers got paid on time March 1st, am I right?
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Apr 1, 2014 13:53
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Xibanya posted:I got stellar reviews too, no raise and a bonus that's less than one month's rent. (My rent is $850.)
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Apr 2, 2014 00:45
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Golden Bee posted:That's...odd. Is there no way to carpool, take public transit, work from home, etc? I work for a company that processes payments. No VPN allowed. As for public transit, I live in Austin so ha ha ha.
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Apr 2, 2014 00:48
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So for the past six weeks or so I've been loaned out to a director to deal with some pressing concerns here at work. Turns out the guy is a yeller, a micromanager and changes his mind twice a day. He's the kind of guy who has the balls to yell about "not getting anything done" after all that as well. And lets just say everyone else around him (above and below) is getting really pissed off at him. Constant "check-in" meetings that go 50% longer than scheduled, constantly scrapping previously agreed to schedules, complete rejection of previously asked-for analyses (and then bringing them back, so save all of your old work!), and so on. I get into work today to find out that he's on vacation through the end of next week. The only way we know this is because his boss has a notification on her calender. Nothing on his, and no mention of it in our daily meetings or endless calls and emails. No mention of what is needed for the endless number of meetings he reports out to. This should be fun.
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Apr 2, 2014 14:19
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he's suspended or possibly fired. Same thing happened to me while I was on vacation. Checked my work email randomly one morning and my boss said he would be away for the next 3 weeks. There had been no prior announcement, no "while I'm away we're going to do X", nothing. Came back from vacation, first thing at 9am on Monday was a meeting where our VP apologized for said boss assaulting some of our team members on campus.
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Apr 2, 2014 14:49
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Renegret posted:I'm still waiting on my "Yearly Compensation Meeting" where they talk about my raise. That was supposed to happen two weeks ago. So, uh, I got this today. 1.82% yup! At least it's prorated to 9 months ago for reasons I don't understand so I'll get a nice fat check of dozens of dollars.
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Apr 2, 2014 18:56
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peter banana posted:he's suspended or possibly fired. Same thing happened to me while I was on vacation. Checked my work email randomly one morning and my boss said he would be away for the next 3 weeks. There had been no prior announcement, no "while I'm away we're going to do X", nothing. Came back from vacation, first thing at 9am on Monday was a meeting where our VP apologized for said boss assaulting some of our team members on campus. Well, it turns out his vacation starts on Monday, but you're not the first person to say something along these lines... Solkanar512 fucked around with this message at 03:11 on Apr 3, 2014 |
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Apr 3, 2014 03:07
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The same thing just happened to the director. He was 'going on a business trip' and that basically meant he was fired. A bunch of his personal belongings are still in his office, too, and he hasn't been back in a few weeks to collect any of it.  Should we just put it in a box and store it somewhere?About all of that poo poo that's going on here - they realized I was looking for another job and I got a pretty big raise as well as a surprise bonus. A bunch of the people that were loving with the payroll got fired. I knew there was something really fishy going on here. Truth is stranger than fiction. Apparently two of the managers were not only siphoning off a lot of money from the company, but at the same time they were recruiting our best consultants to other firms and then collecting a big recruitment bonus from said firms. Things have been running way better now that they're not here to gently caress everything up.
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Apr 3, 2014 14:25
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I was out sick with strep throat on Monday and the first half of Tuesday - still sick as a dog now, but was no longer contagious halfway through Tuesday so I came in then and every day since. Of course no one did any of my responsibilities while I was gone, so on Tuesday I was working like mad to get my part done on some paperwork with a Wednesday 2pm deadline. So Tuesday around 4pm I was just finishing up and my boss says, "Hey do you have any more of these for me?" I said, "Yes, I have two in my hand right here I'm just putting binder clips on them". He then just walked out the door to the warehouse where he smokes while working. Confused why he didn't want to wait 3 milliseconds, I put the two papers in his inbox and went to go finish other stuff. On Wednesday at 3pm I noticed that the paperwork was still in his inbox, untouched. I went to go talk to my other bosses to be like, "Do you remember when he asked me yesterday if I had any more for him? And he walked out while I was just binder-clipping them together?" They said "Yes, that is odd. Maybe he already submitted them." Today I come into the office and I found the two stupid things in my chair with a note that says "BANANAS, LETS DISCUSS THESE." I just know I'm going to get a lecture about getting things to him on time. I don't know how to politely say "Well sir you ignored my answer to your direct question on Tuesday. They were ready for you at 4pm the day before they were due." (4pm is nothing for him - he comes into the office around 11am and leaves around 10pm) I should have stayed home the whole week. I'm miserable, body achey, coughing constantly, and my fever hasn't gone below 100 without Advil in almost 5 days.
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Apr 3, 2014 14:30
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My company laid off half of my department in January but with an end date of December  Now, my director and manager are pissed because people are starting to use up all their sick time. How dare these peons use their rightfully and legally earned sick time! And the management is also surprised and upset productivity has gone down. 
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Apr 3, 2014 17:50
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Hand of the King posted:My company laid off half of my department in January but with an end date of December Wait - so they found out in January that at the end of the year, they will not have a job anymore?
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Apr 3, 2014 18:24
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Shadowhand00 posted:Wait - so they found out in January that at the end of the year, they will not have a job anymore? Yes. Their jobs are being relocated from CA to NJ. They were told on Jan 2nd when everyone got back from the holidays.
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Apr 3, 2014 19:13
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Hand of the King posted:My company laid off half of my department in January but with an end date of December That's pretty uh advanced notice. Are they hoping everyone bails before the end of the year so that they don't have to pay severance or what?
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Apr 3, 2014 23:56
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To further illustrate how raises are in no way linked to annual reviews (and are bullshit): A few years ago, my first year on the job, I set some great, measurable goals and delivered 100% on all of them, earning me an excellent review score and lots of nice comments from my boss. The review process is exhausting, requiring at least 4 measurable goals, plus an "overall goal". I’m in the tech industry in the Bay Area, so I expected (lol), and was led to believe during the hiring process (double lol), that I would get a competitive-level raise every year. Something in the 5+% range! Instead I got 2.5%, which turned out to be barely enough to cover the slight raise in employee health insurance costs. This despite a measurable contribution to the company, a recent huge influx of investor cash, and a huge uptick in corporate profits. The following year I half-assed my goals and either barely accomplished them or didn’t even finish them. That year I got 3%. Fellow middle-aged goons: Remember the days when 5% raises annually was practically guaranteed? I remember 15+ years ago the bare minimum that everyone got was 3%. Anything additional was based on your review/merit, so if you did an average job you could usually count on at least 4 or 5 percent. What a world we live in that I feel guilty bitching about this, as I’ve been conditioned to “just be glad I have a job” and “at least it’s better than nothing”. Really, the only way to get ahead and get better pay is to jump ship for another company and hope the slight increase in pay makes it worth the jump. Then look forward to stagnating-in-place with measly annual raises, if any, until your next move.
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Apr 4, 2014 01:19
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Caustic posted:
A friend of mine got a promotion/raise (~2%) & just found out his company is hiring someone for his old position with a base salary 15% more than he currently gets after his promotion. 
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Apr 4, 2014 02:18
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Why would he even accept a promotion with a 2% raise in the first place? Unless he just wants the title/experience so he can  after a year or so, I guess, but still, did he try to negotiate at all? The company sure did get a bargain, since I'm sure they'd have had to pay much more than +15% to hire someone who wasn't already indoctrinated into horribly below-market pay for your buddy's new position.
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Apr 4, 2014 03:51
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Armacham posted:That's pretty uh advanced notice. Are they hoping everyone bails before the end of the year so that they don't have to pay severance or what? I'm not sure, but it completely sapped the morale and nobody gives a poo poo. Now the management constantly asks the team leads (me) to come up with ways to motivate the team and get them engaged. Even if we bring up suggestions (e.g. pot luck, lunch and bowl, etc.), they fall on deaf ears. I don't know why this responsibility falls on us but god drat does it annoy the poo poo out of us because we're probably next.
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Apr 4, 2014 05:00
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Hand of the King posted:Even if we bring up suggestions (e.g. pot luck, lunch and bowl, etc.), they fall on deaf ears. I am consistently amazed at how entrenched some ideas are, like the idea that everyone bringing a casserole to work will somehow make the problem of poor management go away.
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Apr 4, 2014 06:12
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ItalicSquirrels posted:I am consistently amazed at how entrenched some ideas are, like the idea that everyone bringing a casserole to work will somehow make the problem of poor management go away. It's funny because that's what I think about all that as well. At best, these are temporary solutions. A stupid potluck will only make everyone happy for that day and it's back to the same poo poo, but apparently, and not surprisingly, that's what the soon-to-be-laid-off team wants. All I could come up with was we're all poo poo out of luck and the company screwed up by announcing it 11 months in advance. After my manager heard that, she asked me to come up with several team activities to maximize work engagement and revitalize the morale. 
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Apr 4, 2014 06:34
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Hand of the King posted:It's funny because that's what I think about all that as well. At best, these are temporary solutions. A stupid potluck will only make everyone happy for that day and it's back to the same poo poo, but apparently, and not surprisingly, that's what the soon-to-be-laid-off team wants. Job-search Fridays?
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Apr 4, 2014 07:48
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Hand of the King posted:It's funny because that's what I think about all that as well. At best, these are temporary solutions. A stupid potluck will only make everyone happy for that day and it's back to the same poo poo, but apparently, and not surprisingly, that's what the soon-to-be-laid-off team wants.
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Apr 4, 2014 13:57
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Cast_No_Shadow posted:Job-search Fridays? Company paying for premium accounts on LinkedIn, glassdoor, and other such sites?
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Apr 4, 2014 14:11
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Halloween Jack posted:I find cooking a dish to share at a potluck a lot more stressful for a lot less payoff than cooking a meal with my fiancee and enjoying the leftovers the next day, but it's me, that curmudgeonly introverted bastard in your office. I find it more stressful for that, plus all the picky eaters will hate you if you "hide" onion/pepper/etc in a thing. So glad my supervisor and boss at my new job are the "eat everything and then some" type, so I don't have to worry about pissing off anyone that matters.
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Apr 4, 2014 14:51
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Hand of the King posted:My company laid off half of my department in January but with an end date of December I can top that: how about being notified in Dec '13 that you're going to lose your job fourth quarter '14, or maybe first quarter '15. Really, just whenever we're done with you. Oh if you voluntarily leave before then though, you get no severance and eat any tuition bills we were going to pay for. Hilarious.
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Apr 4, 2014 15:46
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Genuinely curious if all management around the world are as sociopathic and incompetent as American management.
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Apr 4, 2014 15:56
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Cast_No_Shadow posted:Job-search Fridays? This actually not a crazy and pretty decent idea. An hour or two helping employees brush up their resumes, practise interviewing skills, share job openings and job search experience. They've already entirely checked out, it's not like you're losing productivity, you could even do it after hours or on lunch. But if you can't get a potluck through, good loving luck with it, I guess.
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Apr 4, 2014 16:03
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Hand of the King posted:It's funny because that's what I think about all that as well. At best, these are temporary solutions. A stupid potluck will only make everyone happy for that day and it's back to the same poo poo, but apparently, and not surprisingly, that's what the soon-to-be-laid-off team wants. Keep the fridge stocked with beer instead of soda and rotting orphaned leftovers. If I were a laid off employee, I'm not sure that there would be anything to make me happy about going to the job I've been laid off from for the next nine months/until I find another job other than free beer at work that I'm allowed to drink at my desk. It doesn't even have to be particularly good beer. Also yeah, having to make some dish to bring to work just seems like a drag. And gently caress team activities and retreats - those are just annoying, especially when they make you do dumb group activities. They always feel like grade school.
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Apr 4, 2014 16:08
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potlucks with people you don't know socially/know their level of cooking skill are weird. One time at a potluck a coworker brought in cookies she baked. It probably would have helped if she'd known that there is such a thing as unsalted butter. Everyone grimacing while eating them was pretty funny though.
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Apr 4, 2014 16:21
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Uh oh, the potluck turned into a "everyone bring $5-10 to have X place cater for lunch". Yup, that's going to go well - spend your own money on this restaurant no one likes! blarghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh edit: lol our food will be as good as how much money everyone brings in. Good god...
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Apr 4, 2014 16:51
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Hand of the King posted:Uh oh, the potluck turned into a "everyone bring $5-10 to have X place cater for lunch". Yup, that's going to go well - spend your own money on this restaurant no one likes! Hah, that's the worst. Everyone has to eat lunch with each other. Not only that but even though we're forcing you together, you have to pay for the lunch that we're going to be choosing.
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Apr 4, 2014 17:15
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Peven Stan posted:Genuinely curious if all management around the world are as sociopathic and incompetent as American management. It really is American companies are run by sociopaths that make other horrible companies in developed nations look like goddamn geniuses compared to them. April 1st is the start of our new year and to celebrate they broke all of my organizations financial software. I haven't done any more in 4 days.
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Apr 4, 2014 18:08
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ladyweapon posted:A friend of mine got a promotion/raise (~2%) & just found out his company is hiring someone for his old position with a base salary 15% more than he currently gets after his promotion. I've got a better one  My girl worked at a major bank as a teller manager earning 36k per year. She transferred to a busier branch where she managed twice as many teller (from 3 to 6) and got a little bump up to 38k. The [incompetent foreign] lady they hired to replace her at the original branch was hired on at 45k! Anyways my girl quit the job at 38K because she disliked her new boss, she also didn't get a raise (which apparently wasn't a big factor for her). She left for a year and worked out of the industry. Her most recent boss called her up and said he wanted her back and long story short she got her 38k job back and is now making 45k and the boss isn't being a jerk anymore. Corporate America is ridiculous. Companies would literally prefer you quit and then come back at a much higher salary than just give you a modest raise to begin with and avoid the hassle. It is somehow easier for them to justify the extra costs of training, hiring new people, and running a branch short handed and having to pay overtime then it is to simply offer reasonable raises.
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Apr 4, 2014 18:20
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dennyk posted:Why would he even accept a promotion with a 2% raise in the first place? Unless he just wants the title/experience so he can I should have added that he works for a non-profit, so there are concessions you make. His job has other perks that make the less-pay more bearable, but when he heard what they were offering he actively started looking for other jobs. He could probably get a 30% bump just by switching jobs.  tesilential posted:Corporate America is ridiculous. Companies would literally prefer you quit and then come back at a much higher salary than just give you a modest raise to begin with and avoid the hassle. Caustic posted:What a world we live in that I feel guilty bitching about this, as I’ve been conditioned to “just be glad I have a job” and “at least it’s better than nothing”. ladyweapon fucked around with this message at 18:52 on Apr 4, 2014 |
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Apr 4, 2014 18:49
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quote =/= edit 
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Apr 4, 2014 18:52
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