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i once masturbated to porn!!!! on the internet!!
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Jan 19, 2016 07:52
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Jeff Sichoe posted:teacher or student? Student
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Jan 19, 2016 07:54
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Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:oen time i downloaded a anarchy text file, yeah the anarchist cookbook, maybe u heard of it???? If you fill a tennis ball with matchheads you can take down a M1A1 Abraham with it, an Apache attack helicopter if you've got a good arm.
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Jan 19, 2016 07:54
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I once challenged an online stranger to fight or 'come at' me. Don't worry, I took precautions to ensure my ip address was hidden, this was badass not crazy.
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Jan 19, 2016 09:15
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Moon Atari posted:I once challenged an online stranger to fight or 'come at' me. Don't worry, I took precautions to ensure my ip address was hidden, this was badass not crazy. My friend found a literal fat 4chan otaku whod said hed beat him up on the web. He confronted him at a bus stop and the guy was like "it was just an internet thing". My friend is a funny badass
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Jan 19, 2016 10:09
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The cars they sometimes put on a stand in front of a nightclub or a casino as a prize you sort of have a chance of winning. We stole one while drunk, it almost didn't have any fuel so it only drove for about a 100 m so we pushed it down into the river and left.
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Jan 19, 2016 10:25
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i once punched a dude in the eye and he slumped
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Jan 19, 2016 10:35
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I killed a bunch of people once. *takes a deep breath*
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Jan 19, 2016 11:42
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i once took a nap wearing a gun in a holster with the safety off. i dunno why they kept insisting to leave the safety off at all times, it seemed kinda stupid to me.
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Jan 19, 2016 12:29
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i got into a fight when i was a teenager, and the cops showed up. the other guy turned to run and i just started punching the poo poo out of him in front of the cops i lost that fight but gently caress it punk rock
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Jan 19, 2016 12:33
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This is way more stupid than it is badass, but when I was 18 my roommate was a drug dealer and one of his friends woke us up at about 3-4 am to get an eightball to sell to one of his friends. He went outside and maybe two minutes later we heard yelling so I went outside to see what was going on. He was sitting in the passenger seat of a car by the edge of the driveway and two other guys were in the car yelling at him to get out. I told my roommate he was getting robbed and when I turned back around the driver had gotten out of the car and was walking toward the back of it with a pistol while looking at me. The road was probably 50 feet from the sliding glass door I came out of, the driveway was all gravel, and I wasn't wearing anything but boxers, but for some dumb reason I decided to sprint right at the fucker. His reaction was to almost poo poo himself and run up to the passenger seat and put the gun to my roomie's friend's head so I stopped. I'd made it about halfway down the driveway by that point. I watched as he tried to yank the dude out of the car but his seat belt was still on and he kept trying to reach into the floorboard while yelling that he needed his shoes. The shithead's buddy in the back moved up to the drivers seat while this was going on and he finally managed to pull my roommate's friend out of the car, shoes in hand. He jumped in the passenger seat and they took off. It was really stupid and I didn't make the situation any better but at least I didn't get shot. Also, my roommate's friend yelling that he needed his shoes while having a gun pointed at him still makes me laugh because it's loving ridiculous.
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Jan 19, 2016 12:40
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Once I almost broke my spine in a ski accident. I was p sure I was gonna die
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Jan 19, 2016 13:58
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One time I had sex with three different girls in one day and none of them knew about the others. That's right idiots, I managed to disappoint three different women with boring poorly executed sex all in one day.
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Jan 19, 2016 14:11
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Got drunk in high schools with some buddies and stole the PE parachute that the elementary school next door left out on the baseball field. We rigged the chute to a heavy duty hiking Jansport backpack and went parasailing in the boonies behind my buddy's F-150 2 days in a row before returning the (now very dirty and a little ripped) parachute to where we found it. We even took turns hitting tennisballs at each other while we were parasailing
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Jan 19, 2016 15:05
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i blew up a big rear end truck with an acetylene-oxygen rig, it was kind of rad, oorah and all, but we cannot let the terrorists win can we no we can't ok
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Jan 19, 2016 15:28
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I once got a call from one of those scammers who pretend that your computer has a virus and who get you to log on to a shady site and download an actual virus, so I pretended to go along with it, then I said I'd been redirected to my government's semi-official yet semi-vigilante-esqu crime reporting site and if I could please have her full name and physical address so she could be arrested. Then I think her supervisor hung up for her. You had to be there though, it was the best. loving scammers, they're worth a bit of fun. I was put on the spot, alright! Next time I'm putting her on to Cleverbot, with me merely translating the text to voice. I've never tried scammer versus Cleverbot before.
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Jan 19, 2016 15:40
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as a pitcher i caught a line drive with my bare hand, twice.
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Jan 19, 2016 16:43
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killed fiddy men stole Hitler's canoe, the Japanese blew off my shins
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Jan 19, 2016 16:50
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i got hit with a pool cue in a bar once, but it turned out the pool cue was really shoddy and cheap and it just broke over me without me barely even flinching. everyone was all like wtf? then the guy that hit me got yelled at and was asked to leave so i guess what i'm saying is i didn't do anything badass at all just got really lucky and people thought i was a badass.
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Jan 19, 2016 16:50
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Quote-Unquote posted:i got hit with a pool cue in a bar once, but it turned out the pool cue was really shoddy and cheap and it just broke over me without me barely even flinching. everyone was all like wtf? then the guy that hit me got yelled at and was asked to leave We all have that. I deflected a football in a high school camp and somehow people thought it was badass. I just did a reflex thing, it was nothing. Then I squandered it by being an emo dick the next day, then I got it back by making some "leap of faith" thing on a rope course. All I had to do was jump for a rope! It shouldn't be a thing! They were probably just humoring me anyway. A lot of badass things are probably just luck. At least in high school.
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Jan 19, 2016 17:01
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Quote-Unquote posted:i got hit with a pool cue in a bar once, but it turned out the pool cue was really shoddy and cheap and it just broke over me without me barely even flinching. everyone was all like wtf? then the guy that hit me got yelled at and was asked to leave Pool cues only weigh between 1 and 1 1/4 pounds and they're five feet long. The only way someone could've really hurt you is if it were one of the more expensive ones with a metal rod in it so you can screw it together. Even then, they'd probably get one good whack before it broke. Maybe if they tried to stab you after it broke? Anyway, congrats on looking like a badass to all the bar patrons.
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Jan 19, 2016 22:39
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I died while giving birth to myself, are we done here?
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Jan 19, 2016 22:43
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capital murder
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Jan 19, 2016 22:57
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http://i.imgur.com/1Gl305G.webm
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Jan 19, 2016 22:59
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i smoke weed which is pretty fucken badass
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Jan 19, 2016 23:08
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one time this bully who is a real jerk said something and my response had everyone laughing at him 
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Jan 19, 2016 23:09
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Stuck a plunger on a bathroom mirror.
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Jan 19, 2016 23:10
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Nation posted:one time this bully who is a real jerk said something and my response had everyone laughing at him what was your response?
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Jan 19, 2016 23:12
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Bare-handed swan wrestling.
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Jan 20, 2016 00:13
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i've never done anything badass
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Jan 20, 2016 00:18
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crashed my motorbike then got my dick sucked while still covered in blood and gravel
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Jan 20, 2016 00:27
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am i crazy, or was there a time when starting a thread in gbs with "sup nigs" was basically the same as a ban me tag?
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Jan 20, 2016 00:29
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www posted:what was your response? "thats what she said"
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Jan 20, 2016 00:35
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i filmed this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HuFZYfec9ww
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Jan 20, 2016 00:57
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Zzulu posted:yes, i too am american soldier. I went to Iraq and I killed many women and children. Now my life is fulfilled and my murderlust sated same, except I mostly killed mahdi army fighters, and it isn't. maybe that's why.
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Jan 20, 2016 01:09
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Picked up cottonmouth snake
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Jan 20, 2016 01:16
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EXTREME INSERTION posted:Picked up cottonmouth snake did you rape it
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Jan 20, 2016 01:19
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EXTREME INSERTION posted:Picked up cottonmouth snake did u give him some gatorade
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Jan 20, 2016 01:19
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smoked hookah with peshmerga in kurdistan.
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Jan 20, 2016 02:13
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roymorrison posted:smoked hookah with peshmerga in kurdistan. did you suck them off habibi
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Jan 20, 2016 02:19
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