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bag em and tag em posted:My buddy is in year 5 of IT having started out with literally 0 knowledge or experience. He just faked it in his interview. The thing is however stupid you think you are with conouters, everyone else is even worse. There are somehow still people who are totally baffled about even the most basic functions of the magic glow box with the Google inside. So just lie and successfully turn on a computer and you get the job then fake it until you make it. Thanks I'm gonna finish my ba and be a computer janitor. hekk yyea
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Dec 7, 2016 17:07
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Entry level programmer jobs are harder to acquire than IT. You can fake your way into a helpdesk position pretty easily. They're all brainless mutants too so you don't even have to know anything, they're just looking for some kind of experience working with computers. When I started I had a gaming buddy that was a CIO in another state. He let me put his info on my resume as a "sub contract" doing remote support for clients with an access backend. Also learn how to write a resume that isn't poo poo. Now show up to work on time and dressed impeccably. Work really really hard night and day until you get promoted in a few weeks, then show up to your sweet new IT job late, disheveled and smelling pretty bad so you fit in.
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Dec 7, 2016 17:07
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I worked in junior IT for 2 months before I decided I would rather deal with the living hell that is being a technical account manager at a marketing agency than deal with my loving IT coworkers one picosecond longer
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Dec 7, 2016 17:09
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I went from IT support to project management. I miss it terribly.
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Dec 7, 2016 17:15
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i would like to live in a world where IT pays more than minimum wage
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Dec 7, 2016 17:27
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i dunno take some comp sci classes in college and then luck into it six years later when your other things don't pan out
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Dec 7, 2016 21:41
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i work for a bank it sucks balls lol i dont know any of that computer poo poo
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Dec 7, 2016 21:56
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I work in Tech as a generalist doing engineering stuff (i.e. I solve problems that are weird and/or hard to solve) and I make 6 figgies a year.
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Dec 7, 2016 21:59
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I also don't know how to hard boil an egg or paint a shed. I am a literal retard in 95% of all things.
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Dec 7, 2016 22:00
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Learn to code enough to get an entry-level job. You'll get on the job training for the rest. It used to be you needed a comp sci degree or maybe some certs. These days things are changing to the point where if you can code, that's all companies care about.
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Dec 7, 2016 22:15
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Oh and don't go into IT unless you hate yourself.
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Dec 7, 2016 22:16
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Minimalist Program posted:I also don't know how to hard boil an egg or paint a shed. I am a literal retard in 95% of all things.
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Dec 7, 2016 22:20
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Minimalist Program posted:I work in Tech as a generalist doing engineering stuff (i.e. I solve problems that are weird and/or hard to solve) and I make 6 figgies a year. help this decade old database is returning the wrong session one in ten thousand times and it might be related to the load balancer or it might not!!!
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Dec 7, 2016 22:20
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moonlighting as a camwhore doesnt count as IT, right
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Dec 7, 2016 22:21
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Mozi posted:help this decade old database is returning the wrong session one in ten thousand times and it might be related to the load balancer or it might not!!! we can't just take it off the load balancer, you'll have to do it saturday night at 9 pm lol
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Dec 7, 2016 22:22
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Mozi posted:help this decade old database is returning the wrong session one in ten thousand times and it might be related to the load balancer or it might not!!! Have you tried polarizing the deflector dish?
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Dec 7, 2016 22:24
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i remember seeing a human interest piece a while ago on the local news where this company was hiring high-functioning autistic people to run their tier 1 technical support take that how you want to pre-emptive edit: i work from home
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Dec 7, 2016 22:26
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The "IT" jobs most people think of when they hear IT are terrible. Talking to end users or doing basic sysadmin stuff is boring and the coworkers are the worst. Teach yourself some math, get a LLC, learn haskell/lisp or some other functional language or learn ML framework stuff like tensorflow, then just fly around the world putting peoples problems into mostly the same models / solving the same ODE's and you're making all the money you could want. And most importantly, try to get business savvy. You have to know what people out there want and how to sell your services to them. Go to the trade shows CIOs/CISOs go to and learn how to pitch yourself using all the dumb buzzphrases they learn. Good luck OP!
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Dec 7, 2016 22:39
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Blockade posted:The "IT" jobs most people think of when they hear IT are terrible. Talking to end users or doing basic sysadmin stuff is boring and the coworkers are the worst. Teach yourself some math, get a LLC, learn haskell/lisp or some other functional language or learn ML framework stuff like tensorflow, then just fly around the world putting peoples problems into mostly the same models / solving the same ODE's and you're making all the money you could want. no no no I appreciate the advice but you dont understand I want to avoid hard work
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Dec 7, 2016 22:44
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Mozi posted:help this decade old database is returning the wrong session one in ten thousand times and it might be related to the load balancer or it might not!!! *in extremely gay voice* sounds like a load balancer problem to me.
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Dec 7, 2016 22:48
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buckets of buckets posted:no no no I appreciate the advice but you dont understand I want to avoid hard work learn how to operate in unix or a niche ibm environment you can be gainfully stoned for several years
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Dec 7, 2016 22:49
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I've worked for the govt since I got my underwater basket weaving ba in the mid-00s. It's been a good racket for several years but all this draining the swamp talk is sure problematic. I might have to learn how to code
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Dec 7, 2016 22:52
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Blockade posted:Teach yourself some math, get a LLC, learn haskell/lisp or some other functional language or learn ML framework stuff like tensorflow, then just fly around the world putting peoples problems into mostly the same models / solving the same ODE's and you're making all the money you could want. This man speaks the truth.
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Dec 7, 2016 22:54
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Basic IT poo poo is terrible but if you pick the right specialization it becomes interesting at least. I do network poo poo for an ISP and while it's exhausting and frequently stressful it pays pretty well and is almost never boring.
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Dec 7, 2016 23:03
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Everyone who says "Lie" is unironically 100% correct. Lie on your resume, lie to your boss about your skills, lie to their boss about your skills. Get a cool job title and ask for more money and by the time they figure out you're a hack you take that job title and get a better job. You don't owe the company you (potentially) work for anything, squeeze that lovely job for every drop you can.
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Dec 7, 2016 23:13
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do what i do and use nepotism to your advantage op!!!!
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Dec 7, 2016 23:14
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buckets of buckets posted:no no no I appreciate the advice but you dont understand I want to avoid hard work ahhhh that's called management
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Dec 7, 2016 23:14
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also helps a lot of ur white and have a dick
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Dec 7, 2016 23:15
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100 HOGS AGREE posted:Everyone who says "Lie" is unironically 100% correct. this only works if you are a brassy bullshit artist who can sweet-talk a reference from someone at each company you pull this at. if you can do this, why not go into sales? it pays better. but otherwise, yeah, go ahead and fleece some idiots into giving you employment
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Dec 7, 2016 23:15
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Chinatown posted:do what i do and use nepotism to your advantage op!!!! I would but I have no friends and my family died in the great krokodil wave of ought eight
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Dec 7, 2016 23:16
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You'll have to "work hard" for a short period of time in order to prove you're capable of doing it, and then it's just not being the slowest 6% of the workforce every two years
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Dec 7, 2016 23:16
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i got my IT job cause my boss knew about my minecraft server and said one day 'you're into that computer poo poo right? wanna work in IT'? so i said yes and now i watch twitch all day and get mad when someone puts in a ticket
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Dec 7, 2016 23:36
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google
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Dec 7, 2016 23:48
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Blockade posted:The "IT" jobs most people think of when they hear IT are terrible. Talking to end users or doing basic sysadmin stuff is boring and the coworkers are the worst. Teach yourself some math, get a LLC, learn haskell/lisp or some other functional language or learn ML framework stuff like tensorflow, then just fly around the world putting peoples problems into mostly the same models / solving the same ODE's and you're making all the money you could want. Haskell Lisp and TensorFlow look hard, is that really a good place to start for someone who has never coded?
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Dec 7, 2016 23:54
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Idk op sometimes after I eat a tray of stoffers mac and cheese I like to stick my weird, thin, misshapen, pointy nerd penis between some couch cushions and squeeze them together. My cat hates my farts but jokes on him, I live in a studio apartment because it's the only thing I can afford near work and my butt is usually near his face. Sometime I think about stopping by the titty bar on the way back from night classes at itt tech but then I remember they have a dress code and I work in acid washed spandex jeans and keds. Plus I would hate switching from regular to reading glasses every time I got a lap dance. 
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Dec 8, 2016 00:02
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Just spend 6 years getting your EE doctorate, OP. Easiest money ever.
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Dec 8, 2016 00:03
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When I was doing IT recuitment, the jobs / candidates we never seemed to touch were freelance SAP specialists. These guys just seemed to be forever in demand, charged a ton a day, got to travel pretty much all over the world and were generally very aware that they were sought after and loving exploited it to the max. Since i know poo poo all about IT, i dont know if this is still (or ever was) the case.
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Dec 8, 2016 00:24
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frytechnician posted:When I was doing IT recuitment... Since i know poo poo all about IT Accurate.
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Dec 8, 2016 02:58
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