Let's Talk About Loveline! V. 2

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > Rapidly Going Deaf > Let's Talk About Loveline! V. 2

cricket eater joe: Nov 11, 2005; by Ozmaugh

Yay! I got on Loveline tonight! It was a pretty simple call. I called in and they threw me on first and I asked Drew how he had "the sex talk" with his kids." He basically said that he never actually sat down for the talk and instead they brought him questions as they grew up and he was open with them about whatever they wanted to know. It did freak me out a little bit because I asked him when his kids first brought up sex to him and he said that his daughter did when she was five!

Getting through was honestly pretty easy. I called in about five minutes before the show and gave them my question. The screener said that I would be on first and put me on hold while I listened to Drew and Mike bullshit. A short time later the show started and I was the first caller on. Also, Anderson called me an rear end kisser because after my question I told Drew I had read his books and I listened to Loveline archives at work.

# ? May 13, 2011 06:12

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 17:24

40 OZ: May 16, 2003

Does anyone know the episode where the caller is asking if you can get STD's from your penis touching the bowl or water of a public toilet, and Drew laments that his penis goes all the way into the water? Adam goes nuts immediately after.

# ? May 13, 2011 06:56

Low Percent Lunge: Jan 29, 2007

Yeah what the hell is up with American toilets having so much water in the bowl?

Australian Toilet;

USA Toilet;

# ? May 13, 2011 08:28

TomSellek: Jan 31, 2008; Arrogant, dumb, meat headed and stubborn. Please disregard and move on.

My toilet has about as much as the "australia toilet" and I'm in the USA so I don't know what you're on about

# ? May 13, 2011 09:40

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

I'm in Korea and the toilet's full of water. The Germans are the only truly weird ones, with that water-free shelf so you can inspect your poo poo before you flush.

# ? May 13, 2011 10:07

ninjoatse.cx: Apr 9, 2005; Fun Shoe

Old toilets have lots of water, newer ones have less. Restaurants also use the less water version because they're considered more sanitary (or so I've been told).

# ? May 13, 2011 15:06

WouldDesk: Dec 26, 2009

Whitey Ford posted:

Yeah what the hell is up with American toilets having so much water in the bowl?

Australian Toilet;

USA Toilet;

You know there are more options than USA toilet or Australian toilet right :colbert:

My grandparents had one that held about half of what the Australian one does in your photo, and the seat was tiny... before people got fat I guess. That thing sucked. Even for skinny ole me.

But now you can buy just about anything here in America, as long as they don't use 90 gallons of water per flush. Enough toilet talk, let's get to the sex!

# ? May 13, 2011 16:35

CatchrNdRy: Mar 15, 2005; Receiver of the Rye.

cricket eater joe posted:

Yay! I got on Loveline tonight! It was a pretty simple call. I called in and they threw me on first and I asked Drew how he had "the sex talk" with his kids." He basically said that he never actually sat down for the talk and instead they brought him questions as they grew up and he was open with them about whatever they wanted to know. It did freak me out a little bit because I asked him when his kids first brought up sex to him and he said that his daughter did when she was five!

Getting through was honestly pretty easy. I called in about five minutes before the show and gave them my question. The screener said that I would be on first and put me on hold while I listened to Drew and Mike bullshit. A short time later the show started and I was the first caller on. Also, Anderson called me an rear end kisser because after my question I told Drew I had read his books and I listened to Loveline archives at work.

I think its great a toilet discussion has overridden your actual experience with Loveline. I will listen to it later. Did they ask your age?

I think maybe you were just lucky. Anderson has commented many times people have to try over and over to get on. Or perhaps calling before the show begins was a tactic the stoned 15 year olds didn't think of.

# ? May 13, 2011 17:05

Instrumedley: Aug 13, 2009

cricket eater joe posted:

Yay! I got on Loveline tonight! It was a pretty simple call. I called in and they threw me on first and I asked Drew how he had "the sex talk" with his kids." He basically said that he never actually sat down for the talk and instead they brought him questions as they grew up and he was open with them about whatever they wanted to know. It did freak me out a little bit because I asked him when his kids first brought up sex to him and he said that his daughter did when she was five!

Getting through was honestly pretty easy. I called in about five minutes before the show and gave them my question. The screener said that I would be on first and put me on hold while I listened to Drew and Mike bullshit. A short time later the show started and I was the first caller on. Also, Anderson called me an rear end kisser because after my question I told Drew I had read his books and I listened to Loveline archives at work.

Heard you on the show, Drew actually seemed legitimately interested in the question. I knew the call must have been from one of you guys after Loveline archives were mentioned.

# ? May 13, 2011 17:22

Hormones: May 9, 2009

CatchrNdRy posted:

I think its great a toilet discussion has overridden your actual experience with Loveline. I will listen to it later. Did they ask your age?

I think maybe you were just lucky. Anderson has commented many times people have to try over and over to get on. Or perhaps calling before the show begins was a tactic the stoned 15 year olds didn't think of.

Just lucky. I got on once in 2009 by calling around 9:30. Since then I have tried about 10 times trying at 9:30, 9:45 and in the entire 10-12 timeframe of the show. It's always the same thing, the screener answers with "Loveline, what's your question?" You tell her (always been a girl in my case), and she says "Okay hold on", you hear the hold music and about 10 seconds later she comes back with "Sorry, can't take your call tonight, *click*". And that's it.

# ? May 13, 2011 20:13

Arturo Ui: Apr 14, 2005; Forums Bosch Expert

Heh, was listening to a show from March or April of 2000 the other day (don't have the exact date) and Adam makes a reference to taking a picture of a caller's vagina with a newspaper with today's date next to it. Sure enough, Drew makes the exact same 'and a dime for scale' joke that he made several years later when Adam made such a big deal about Drew saying something funny. This time though Adam barely responds to it.

# ? May 13, 2011 20:14

pzy: Feb 20, 2004; Da Boom!

Arturo Ui posted:

Heh, was listening to a show from March or April of 2000 the other day (don't have the exact date) and Adam makes a reference to taking a picture of a caller's vagina with a newspaper with today's date next to it. Sure enough, Drew makes the exact same 'and a dime for scale' joke that he made several years later when Adam made such a big deal about Drew saying something funny. This time though Adam barely responds to it.

Haha wow, good catch. I don't take much offense to the recycling of some jokes/stories, since there's something like 5000 hours of Adam/Drew Loveline out there. I've never caught myself listening to something recycled and thinking "I am so goddamn sick of this story"

# ? May 13, 2011 21:28

CatchrNdRy: Mar 15, 2005; Receiver of the Rye.

Pzykotic posted:

Haha wow, good catch. I don't take much offense to the recycling of some jokes/stories, since there's something like 5000 hours of Adam/Drew Loveline out there. I've never caught myself listening to something recycled and thinking "I am so goddamn sick of this story"

I can never get sick of Teeem the Russian rapper.

Why don't ze girls like me? Maybee I'm goineeng to pop a cap in theese beetches!

CatchrNdRy fucked around with this message at 21:32 on May 13, 2011

# ? May 13, 2011 21:30

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

I got back khand like Jon McEnroe. The beetch steps up, I'm slapping de ho!

# ? May 14, 2011 03:23

Fork of Unknown Origins: Oct 21, 2005; Gotta Herd On?

Did Carolla ever brought up that while he was in highschool he was recruited by a D1 (albeit 1-AA at the time) school for football on Loveline? It says on here that he was, although I don't know if it is accurate: http://www.realitytvworld.com/realitytvdb/wiki/Adam_Carolla

# ? May 14, 2011 03:59

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Fork of Unknown Origins posted:

Did Carolla ever brought up that while he was in highschool he was recruited by a D1 (albeit 1-AA at the time) school for football on Loveline? It says on here that he was, although I don't know if it is accurate: http://www.realitytvworld.com/realitytvdb/wiki/Adam_Carolla

Yeah, he's talked about that before. He's said their team was awful when they tried to recruit him.

# ? May 14, 2011 04:02

frobert blamble: Feb 6, 2009; by T. Finn

Grand Fromage posted:

Yeah, he's talked about that before. He's said their team was awful when they tried to recruit him.

Yeah Carolla was supposedly a pretty talented athlete. I remember one episode of Loveline where he said the reason he didn't take the offer and go to school was because it seemed like there was a lot of paperwork involved and 18-year-old Adam just couldn't be bothered.

# ? May 14, 2011 04:49

WouldDesk: Dec 26, 2009

frobert blamble posted:

Yeah Carolla was supposedly a pretty talented athlete. I remember one episode of Loveline where he said the reason he didn't take the offer and go to school was because it seemed like there was a lot of paperwork involved and 18-year-old Adam just couldn't be bothered.

He is a great long snapper, his TLC show did a segment on it. Very impressive.

# ? May 14, 2011 04:53

ChaosMonkey: Jun 28, 2008

Fork of Unknown Origins posted:

Did Carolla ever brought up that while he was in highschool he was recruited by a D1 (albeit 1-AA at the time) school for football on Loveline? It says on here that he was, although I don't know if it is accurate: http://www.realitytvworld.com/realitytvdb/wiki/Adam_Carolla

Why would I believe an article that doesn't even mention Carolla's crippling case of Crohn's disease?

# ? May 14, 2011 05:16

CatchrNdRy: Mar 15, 2005; Receiver of the Rye.

Hey Liface, I was randomly browsing for shows in lovelinetapes and saw you had commented on EBRUARY 8, 1999, asking if you wanted the show uploaded cause it was blank. if its not a terrible amount of trouble, could you upload it? Thanks!

# ? May 16, 2011 08:04

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

human being better run

# ? May 18, 2011 11:49

Riptor: Apr 13, 2003; here's to feelin' good all the time

Grand Fromage posted:

human being better run

I love that quote because it just sounds so disjointed. Did someone edit it together from three separate clips?

# ? May 18, 2011 14:44

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Riptor posted:

I love that quote because it just sounds so disjointed. Did someone edit it together from three separate clips?

I assume so, from the sound and the fact that I can't imagine when Drew would actually say that.

But, why ain't you got no play playa?

# ? May 18, 2011 14:49

ninjoatse.cx: Apr 9, 2005; Fun Shoe

Nope, human being better run is one sentence. He's reading the lyrics from a rap album.

# ? May 18, 2011 14:57

Rack: Aug 5, 2003; I've misunderstood what a lion is.; Grimey Drawer

If you had a hizzy, you'd be out of the HOUSE.

Urban Dr Drew is a good Drew.

# ? May 18, 2011 15:22

CatchrNdRy: Mar 15, 2005; Receiver of the Rye.

That's my main man mayonnaise!

# ? May 18, 2011 17:20

Majorian: Jul 1, 2009

I was bored, so I put a spear through my penis.

# ? May 18, 2011 17:57

little munchkin: Aug 15, 2010

UltraRed posted:

Nope, human being better run is one sentence. He's reading the lyrics from a rap album.

Not rap, a song by Me'Shell Ndegeocello:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0N83NvSfk4

Adam had Drew read the lyrics to the song when she was a guest.

# ? May 18, 2011 19:40

CatchrNdRy: Mar 15, 2005; Receiver of the Rye.

Grand Fromage posted:

I got back khand like Jon McEnroe. The beetch steps up, I'm slapping de ho!

I recently heard the story about Adam driving Teem and Adam's Catholic little brother Nate back from school. Remember Teem is lardy and Nate is so skinny that his knees are the widest part of his body.

They were sullen about being ignored by girls and Adam was trying to give them a pep talk; next year the girls would be after older sophomores like them.

"Ehh who are you trying to keed? Nate is too skeeny. And I am too fet!" :smith:

And Adam didn't know how to reply.

CatchrNdRy fucked around with this message at 22:26 on May 18, 2011

# ? May 18, 2011 22:23

NIGARS: Sep 12, 2004; yeah nigars

40 OZ posted:

Does anyone know the episode where the caller is asking if you can get STD's from your penis touching the bowl or water of a public toilet, and Drew laments that his penis goes all the way into the water? Adam goes nuts immediately after.

It's 2005-04-07, call starts at about 56:00. One of the funniest segments I've heard in a long time. Just as Adam gets over it, the next caller comments that he suffers from the same affliction and sets him off again.

NIGARS fucked around with this message at 22:29 on May 18, 2011

# ? May 18, 2011 22:27

Low Percent Lunge: Jan 29, 2007

A caller just said "uh yeah I have a question for Drew and Dr Adam"

# ? May 19, 2011 02:33

WouldDesk: Dec 26, 2009

Carolla on Kimmel tonight.

# ? May 19, 2011 05:53

Hormones: May 9, 2009

Bobby Malone posted:

Not rap, a song by Me'Shell Ndegeocello:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0N83NvSfk4

Adam had Drew read the lyrics to the song when she was a guest.

Who's got a date for this?

# ? May 20, 2011 04:49

40 OZ: May 16, 2003

NIGARS posted:

It's 2005-04-07, call starts at about 56:00. One of the funniest segments I've heard in a long time. Just as Adam gets over it, the next caller comments that he suffers from the same affliction and sets him off again.

Bless you.

In the water?! IN THE WATER?

.....DREW?!!!

PASSIONATE, PASSIONATE MAN!!

40 OZ fucked around with this message at 05:06 on May 20, 2011

# ? May 20, 2011 05:01

MC_: Sep 11, 2003

Was watching the Dr Drew show on HLN and regarding one element of the Schwarzeneggar thing he said "It makes me sick!" and it sounded exactly like it does in the years (decades?) old Dr Drew boogie. :laugh:

# ? May 20, 2011 05:09

ChaosMonkey: Jun 28, 2008

MC_ posted:

Was watching the Dr Drew show on HLN and regarding one element of the Schwarzeneggar thing he said "It makes me sick!" and it sounded exactly like it does in the years (decades?) old Dr Drew boogie.

It's an attack on his family!

# ? May 20, 2011 05:56