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Midnight Voyager posted:man, in college, I had an assignment to write a paper about something our family taught us. This teacher was already dogshit, she was terrible at giving us instructions on what she wanted out of us, so I was floundering hard. I dunno, do you want to hear about how my granddad tried to teach me that the N-word was just a word? Is this a can of worms you want to open, lady?? You should really not give assignments that require a specific home life or that would cause kids with a certain kind of home life to have a hard time completing them. A kid with a lovely home life isn't going to have anything good to say on that assignment. My high school Spanish teacher was a nosy stuck-up rear end in a top hat, like 80% of the question and answer exercises in class were him trying to sniff out how much money the kids' families had. Like ¿Qué hiciste durante las vacaciones de verano? (What did you do during summer vacation) is ok if maybe not the most sensitive, ¿A qué se dedican tus padres? (What do your parents do for a living), ehh, getting dicey, ¿Cuántos coches tiene tu familia? and ¿Cuántas habitaciones hay en tu casa? (How many cars/rooms do you have), that's just straight up poor-shaming.
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May 17, 2024 09:03
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purplestuffedworm posted:My high school Spanish teacher was a nosy stuck-up rear end in a top hat, like 80% of the question and answer exercises in class were him trying to sniff out how much money the kids' families had. Like ¿Qué hiciste durante las vacaciones de verano? (What did you do during summer vacation) is ok if maybe not the most sensitive, ¿A qué se dedican tus padres? (What do your parents do for a living), ehh, getting dicey, ¿Cuántos coches tiene tu familia? and ¿Cuántas habitaciones hay en tu casa? (How many cars/rooms do you have), that's just straight up poor-shaming. Workshopping questions for Spanish class, like "Why do you have a broken home?" and "Are you your mother's least favorite child?"
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May 17, 2024 09:06
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DoubleNegative posted:AITAH for being mad that my partner just "went for a walk" in Mexico without telling me? She's going to give him the silent treatment for three days for taking a walk. Total mystery why he felt the need to get some space as soon as she had something to do by herself. ReelBigLizard fucked around with this message at 09:11 on May 17, 2024 |
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May 17, 2024 09:07
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Midnight Voyager posted:But that's lovely to do as well. Because if a kid had a break experience of "well, as usual, my mom screamed at me and locked me in a closet", they're still gonna feel loving poo poo about that assignment. It may feel even worse when to just pretend and write what a kid with a nice life might have done. I'm just saying that if they were determined to go ahead with that assignment, they should be more explicit about what the purpose is (especially if it's graded? And graded so strictly??) and what leeway the student has. Tbh I think unless you're a competent and motivated counsellor, most teachers should probably just try to stay as much out of their students home lives as possible. There's no easy way of talking about that topic without bringing up a lot of unpleasant triggers and most teachers are not capable of handling it in a healthy and constructive way.. hell, a lot of teachers aren't capable of handling school life in a healthy and constructive way full stop
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May 17, 2024 09:11
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Midnight Voyager posted:man, in college, I had an assignment to write a paper about something our family taught us. This teacher was already dogshit, she was terrible at giving us instructions on what she wanted out of us, so I was floundering hard. I dunno, do you want to hear about how my granddad tried to teach me that the N-word was just a word? Is this a can of worms you want to open, lady?? You should really not give assignments that require a specific home life or that would cause kids with a certain kind of home life to have a hard time completing them. A kid with a lovely home life isn't going to have anything good to say on that assignment. My freshman comp teacher gave us an assignment to write a paper about "an important/impactful event in your life". I did a looooot of peer review in that class, and they were almost uniformly awful events. I wrote about my moving out at eighteen and living without my parents to do things like "make sure I am waking up in time for work" and "ensuring there's toilet paper in the bathroom" and how it resulted in me moving back in with my folks. Another guy wrote about the first time he got his rear end kicked. Not in an "I was abused" kind of way, but in a "I was trying to bully this one kid to look cool and he whooped my rear end and it made me reflect on what kind of person I was being" kind of way. I read at least a dozen other papers in that class and they were all about some form of abuse or horrific incident. Dead family members, abusive parents, drunk driver hit my friend and killed them, etc etc etc. It was awful. Just paper after paper of misery. The teacher was young and it was her first year of teaching that class, and whenever I remember that class I always wonder if she ever gave out that assignment again.
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May 17, 2024 09:32
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I got a zero on an art assignment for latin class because I failed to show sufficient effort in ensuring my Spiral of Theodorus maintained proper dimensions inside the wider collage of roman artistic interpretation I had to draw. Sometimes teachers just decide, you know what, this kid can crash upon the rocks of education and be broken.
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May 17, 2024 09:35
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We just learned, you know, Latin in Latin class.
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May 17, 2024 09:40
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When my brother in law was in elementary school, the teacher told the kids to draw their way to school. He drew a straight line, because that's what his way to school was, he lived on the same street. She didn't accept this.
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May 17, 2024 09:48
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BrigadierSensible posted:Yeah? Well I am so rich I get Enrique to drink my beer with his pinky up Up where?
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May 17, 2024 10:09
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Schools have mostly stopped assigning essays on "What I did this summer" and other assignments about their own family or living situation. Because it singles out students that are poor, live in abusive homes or have other kinds of lovely situations that they don't want to be dragged out in school too.
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May 17, 2024 10:16
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Cloacamazing! posted:When my brother in law was in elementary school, the teacher told the kids to draw their way to school. He drew a straight line, because that's what his way to school was, he lived on the same street. She didn't accept this. The mandatory Occupational Safety Card exam uses standard questions. One of the questions is something like: quote:You notice an electric drill with a frayed power cord at work. What do you do: ...which means in-house maintenance electricians always fail that question. (They do it on purpose; of course they know what answer is expected unless it's their first time around.)
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May 17, 2024 10:18
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3D Megadoodoo posted:The mandatory Occupational Safety Card exam uses standard questions. One of the questions is something like: I might be missing something but that's because fixing it is their job, right?
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May 17, 2024 10:34
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Ghost Leviathan posted:I might be missing something but that's because fixing it is their job, right? Yes. But that's the wrong answer.
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May 17, 2024 10:37
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3D Megadoodoo posted:Yes. But that's the wrong answer. Funny thing is, even if they do I imagine taking it to the tool shop and recording that it's broken is the first thing they'd do, so probably technically correct.
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May 17, 2024 10:41
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windex posted:I really don't like the wife here because it seems to me that the only reason this has gone on so long is because she's not defended OP at all. I'm torn between she's the AH and ESH because the only proper way to talk about household income with civility is to not discuss it outside of the household. No to the ESH - you're falling for the trap laid by the rich folk here The thing about rich people etiquette is that it's a game to see how you can bend or even gently break it and get away with it. That puts it on the other person to have to be the one who reacts and 'makes a stink' and then people will say poo poo like this and make it an 'everyone is terrible' situation. It's the same instinct that makes people say that protestors deserve to be brutalized by cops for disturbing the peace. The answer is always: no. Your innate desire for peace is being manipulated by shitheads so that you're blaming the people they are antagonizing for reacting to being antagonized. Do not fall for it. The rich person who said the barb was the one who breached the topic of income. And the rich person was trying to abuse the fact that it's gauche to discuss income in hoping they could trap OP into letting the barb pass, because otherwise his only choice is further breaching the etiquette of discussing income. Essentially, the rich people of this group trapped OP in a situation where his only socially acceptable response is to be constantly insulted, and thought they were so clever for it. OP was finally done with that poo poo and shut it down, and if the rich person wasn't ready to be absolutely bodied at their own game they never should've played with OP in the first place. And it's important he did it because otherwise his place would remain as lowest of the pecking order and 'guy they keep around to insult', and it's hosed up his wife was ok with that if only because it made sure she wasn't in that spot. StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 11:15 on May 17, 2024 |
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May 17, 2024 11:04
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OP technically made a scene, but he did so in a way that made it clear he not only understood the nature of the game they're playing, but that he's been 'kindly' holding back this whole time. He turned the tables and trapped them in a situation where what they said is clearly embarrassing, but if they react by getting upset, it will make them look gauche, which they would never, so all they can do in response is walk away.
StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 11:27 on May 17, 2024 |
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May 17, 2024 11:24
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What StrangersintheNight said meshes perfectly with every interaction I've had with the wealthy.
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May 17, 2024 12:01
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AITB for making my fiancé drop her friends before our wedding or else I wouldn’t marry herquote:I 24F and my fiancé 24F have been planning our wedding for 2 years. Her friends never liked me in fact they have “pranked” me by stealing my car for 3 days leading me to call the police and filling it with packing peanuts and dropping it off outside mine and my fiancé’s apartment. Today my fiancé was talking about her friends and I said what about them. She told me they are planning something for the wedding that we will love but they won’t tell us what it is. Knowing them it’s insane and will ruin the whole day. I told her to tell them not to but she said they won’t budge. I said they are uninvited then because we can’t have that stress on our wedding. pranks!
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May 17, 2024 12:11
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Some people believe you need to keep assholes as friends simply because of the longevity of the relationship.
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May 17, 2024 12:43
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Mx. posted:AITA because I won’t ask the teacher to change my daughter’s grade? Being able to grasp the important goals of a task and finding ways to accomplish them when the literal reading of the assignment doesn't work is actually a very good skill to have. This isn't journalism class, the teacher isn't going to verify that Bobby actually went to Disneyland and that Space Mountain was actually his favorite ride. It's just an exercise to get kids to write something. She was understood that even if the teacher didn't.
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May 17, 2024 13:05
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Assignments should have rubrics so that learners can see the parameters they are being marked against, and how they fared in that judgement I think the teacher was just being an arsehole tbh
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May 17, 2024 13:37
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I had to do one of those assignments in middle school and that's how I ended up seeing the school social worker once a week.
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May 17, 2024 13:39
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it's gotta be intended right? it's a good way to make sure the kids are in a safe environment outside of school.
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May 17, 2024 13:57
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Ominous Jazz posted:it's gotta be intended right? it's a good way to make sure the kids are in a safe environment outside of school. it's a good way to do classroom bullying against the minors in your care, too, and sometimes THAT'S the intention
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May 17, 2024 14:07
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dang
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May 17, 2024 14:09
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The kid should have made up a plausible story instead of a time travel story, and the parent missed the opportunity to teach that lesson.
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May 17, 2024 14:29
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Wii Spawn Camper posted:The kid should have made up a plausible story instead of a time travel story, and the parent missed the opportunity to teach that lesson. All stories involve time travel. 
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May 17, 2024 14:31
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Barudak posted:I got a zero on an art assignment for latin class because I failed to show sufficient effort in ensuring my Spiral of Theodorus maintained proper dimensions inside the wider collage of roman artistic interpretation I had to draw. I had an English teacher in college who was a "Feminist" in the "Women must be given every opportunity to succeed and the way we accomplish this is by making sure men can't" way. We had an assignment to write a song lyric interpretation and I got it back with a B- and her only comment being a "You're wrong" written across the top of the cover page in red ink. She'd also berate men who asked questions in class, whereas if a woman asked the same question that became the entire topic of discussion in class that day. I called her out on this double standard and her response was "It wasn't an appropriate topic to discuss yesterday, it is an appropriate topic today." and was docked that day's attendance points. It loving sucked!
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May 17, 2024 14:37
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Mx. posted:AITA because I won’t ask the teacher to change my daughter’s grade? My god. I hate every part of this. The first thing we did in 11th grade english was just write a sampler for the teacher: an essay on whether we preferred M&Ms or Skittles. I had some trouble stretching "I like chocolate" to an entire page. In subsequent years, I've been wishing I had had the persipacity to just make something up. I wish that someone had told me in fifth grade "It's not truth-telling class, it's English class, and as long as your nonsense is in English it counts". My life would have dramatically improved. Then comes this story, and calls into question all my thoughts that life could have been better. Acid vat for both adults.
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May 17, 2024 14:38
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Khizan posted:My freshman comp teacher gave us an assignment to write a paper about "an important/impactful event in your life". I did a looooot of peer review in that class, and they were almost uniformly awful events. I wrote about my moving out at eighteen and living without my parents to do things like "make sure I am waking up in time for work" and "ensuring there's toilet paper in the bathroom" and how it resulted in me moving back in with my folks. Another guy wrote about the first time he got his rear end kicked. Not in an "I was abused" kind of way, but in a "I was trying to bully this one kid to look cool and he whooped my rear end and it made me reflect on what kind of person I was being" kind of way. Not American, but don't they do college entry essays that kind of encourage tales of overcoming adversity? Can kind of understand coming from that and just repeating the same in their first ever college writing classes.
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May 17, 2024 14:47
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S40CheckingAccount posted:My god. I hate every part of this. The first thing we did in 11th grade english was just write a sampler for the teacher: an essay on whether we preferred M&Ms or Skittles. I had some trouble stretching "I like chocolate" to an entire page. In subsequent years, I've been wishing I had had the persipacity to just make something up. I wish that someone had told me in fifth grade "It's not truth-telling class, it's English class, and as long as your nonsense is in English it counts". My life would have dramatically improved. Then comes this story, and calls into question all my thoughts that life could have been better. There's a lot people could do differently in high school if they had the knowledge and hormonal neurochemistry of full grown adults, but "magically transform a number of teachers from psychotic bullies into normal people" is absolutely not one of them
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May 17, 2024 14:48
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boofhead posted:There's a lot people could do differently in high school if they had the knowledge and hormonal neurochemistry of full grown adults, but "magically transform a number of teachers from psychotic bullies into normal people" is absolutely not one of them It's kind of shocking to look back at the hell that was Eighth grade and realize that all my teachers were awful. Like, a lot of the problem was them.
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May 17, 2024 14:52
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I had an elementary school teacher who would berate students for saying "Oh" instead of "Zero" when reciting numbers and insisted that any notes we took be only one sentence per line of our notebooks. He slapped our hands with a ruler if he caught us line-wrapping. I wish i was joking. He also pulled the "i don't know can you?" thing when people asked if they could use the bathroom.
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May 17, 2024 14:53
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Everyone complains but nobody ever thanks these teachers for hardening students against the depressing reality of real life
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May 17, 2024 14:59
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Years later I suddenly remembered a song we'd been taught in elementary school about coffee and suddenly it hit me that, holy poo poo, this song was incredibly racist. It used some antiquated language, so we kids didn't get it at the time, but I definitely went around singing it and no adult ever said anything to the teacher.
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May 17, 2024 15:03
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Fatty posted:Not American, but don't they do college entry essays that kind of encourage tales of overcoming adversity? Can kind of understand coming from that and just repeating the same in their first ever college writing classes. I've never known that to be a thing outside of movies and such, though maybe it's an Ivy thing.
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May 17, 2024 15:09
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windex posted:I really don't like the wife here because it seems to me that the only reason this has gone on so long is because she's not defended OP at all. I'm torn between she's the AH and ESH because the only proper way to talk about household income with civility is to not discuss it outside of the household. ESH but only because he's stuck around this weirdo narcissist for so long while her friends AND family dump on him about his upbringing. Genuinely curious what the hell he even sees in her. Mx. posted:AITB for making my fiancé drop her friends before our wedding or else I wouldn’t marry her Upside in the comments, at least commenter posted:Uh, she remained friends with them after this and wasn't sympathetic to you. OP posted:That is true, I hadn't thought about that. She wasn't against what they were doing. She never defended me or even tried. She has never really supported me. I have supported her though the good and the bad. She is not who I thought she was. The rose tinted glasses have been taken off and I can see her for what she is now. Thank you so, so much. commenter posted:Regardless of whether she drops her friends or not I think you should call off the wedding. Her values are not compatible with yours. OP posted:Our values definitely do not align and our goals don't either. We seem to be going in completely separate directions and it doesn't seem to be too bad of a thing anymore. Godspeed & anxiously awaiting more updates
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May 17, 2024 15:21
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boofhead posted:I feel like teachers should be more clear about the purpose of the exercise - it would have cost nothing to say "write about what you did during the summer break, and if you can't think of anything or had a bad break where nothing happened, imagine what an average kid your age might get up to. I don't want fantasy fiction or an itemised list, the point is to practise [such and such a skill]". yeah giving her a D because she wrote what sounds like a cool and fun short story instead of some boring, filler essay about your vacation is trash like if the school counselor wants to encourage her to write more maybe stop punishing her for doing so?
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May 17, 2024 15:23
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Kurieg posted:I had an English teacher in college who was a "Feminist" in the "Women must be given every opportunity to succeed and the way we accomplish this is by making sure men can't" way. We had an assignment to write a song lyric interpretation and I got it back with a B- and her only comment being a "You're wrong" written across the top of the cover page in red ink. She'd also berate men who asked questions in class, whereas if a woman asked the same question that became the entire topic of discussion in class that day. I called her out on this double standard and her response was "It wasn't an appropriate topic to discuss yesterday, it is an appropriate topic today." and was docked that day's attendance points. And here I thought that teacher from Daria was an unrealistic parody. DandyLion posted:Everyone complains but nobody ever thanks these teachers for hardening students against the depressing reality of real life In adult life I found that even lovely bosses are better to deal with than lovely teachers, because there are at least things you can do to avoid, appease or escape a lovely boss.
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May 17, 2024 15:32
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Cloacamazing! posted:Years later I suddenly remembered a song we'd been taught in elementary school about coffee and suddenly it hit me that, holy poo poo, this song was incredibly racist. It used some antiquated language, so we kids didn't get it at the time, but I definitely went around singing it and no adult ever said anything to the teacher. We were taught to sing 'The Sloop John B.' complete with faux Jamaican accents. The whole class, and indeed school, was white. We learned it off a Music and Movement tape which would have been distributed throughout the country (UK).
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May 17, 2024 15:42
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