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straight up brolic
Jan 31, 2007

After all, I was nice in ball,
Came to practice weed scented
Report card like the speed limit

:homebrew::homebrew::homebrew:

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abuse culture.
Sep 8, 2004

5

abuse culture.
Sep 8, 2004
Welsh Jesus

advanced statsman
Dec 26, 2012

ISLAM FC

Spxtz posted:

You might not have seen the current Star Wars movie. In which case I won’t ruin it by revealing any top-secret plot twists, like the imperial weapon‑shield with one small fatal flaw; the return of a bullish, roided-up Darth Vader; or the usual mawkish family stuff that can only be resolved by the violent death of a male parent.

Aside from that you’ll find all the usual things. Infomercial-level acting that doesn’t matter because there are some excellent “fffft” and “zzzzz” weapon noises going on in the background. Good bits where stormtroopers make crackly 1950s‑style small talk just before being killed. And above all the familiar organic landscape of junk, robot-men and animated machines that is the real star of these films and the most obvious reason for the films’ staggering success.

This interaction between machine world and human world is what Star Wars is really all about. Everywhere organic details intrude. The shiny new space station already has a worm in its garbage compactor. The Imperial AT-AT walkers imitate the movements of half‑speed camels and end up being capsized by a few bears with bits of string. The entire opening trilogy rests on whether Darth Vader really is more machine than man or man than machine.

The obvious comparison is with Charles Dickens, franchise juggernaut of a previous age. Dickens’ novels were also full of schmaltz and sentiment. They were also redeemed by this same astonishing imaginative landscape where buildings come alive, people turn into machines, the industrial world intrudes into the world of people, and where the real question in every story is whether the people can both survive and remain recognisably themselves.

All of which is quite a roundabout way of getting on to the glorious return of Yaya Touré.

I love this thread

blue footed boobie
Sep 14, 2012


UEFA SUPREMACY

Spxtz posted:

You might not have seen the current Star Wars movie. In which case I won’t ruin it by revealing any top-secret plot twists, like the imperial weapon‑shield with one small fatal flaw; the return of a bullish, roided-up Darth Vader; or the usual mawkish family stuff that can only be resolved by the violent death of a male parent.

Aside from that you’ll find all the usual things. Infomercial-level acting that doesn’t matter because there are some excellent “fffft” and “zzzzz” weapon noises going on in the background. Good bits where stormtroopers make crackly 1950s‑style small talk just before being killed. And above all the familiar organic landscape of junk, robot-men and animated machines that is the real star of these films and the most obvious reason for the films’ staggering success.

This interaction between machine world and human world is what Star Wars is really all about. Everywhere organic details intrude. The shiny new space station already has a worm in its garbage compactor. The Imperial AT-AT walkers imitate the movements of half‑speed camels and end up being capsized by a few bears with bits of string. The entire opening trilogy rests on whether Darth Vader really is more machine than man or man than machine.

The obvious comparison is with Charles Dickens, franchise juggernaut of a previous age. Dickens’ novels were also full of schmaltz and sentiment. They were also redeemed by this same astonishing imaginative landscape where buildings come alive, people turn into machines, the industrial world intrudes into the world of people, and where the real question in every story is whether the people can both survive and remain recognisably themselves.

All of which is quite a roundabout way of getting on to the glorious return of Yaya Touré.

I absolutely hate that this bullshit is a popular trend in sportswriting.

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

Reminder that there's a Twitter account dedicated solely to ridiculous Ronay quotes:

quote:

Like the little girl in the poem - who like the terrible Diego also has a little curl cross her forehead - Diego Costa has his own deliciously toxic edge. When he's bad he's good. But when he's horrid, he's even better."

quote:

Martin Keown looks sad and brave, like a man giving an urgent, heartfelt funeral oration for a much-loved family gerbil.

huh???

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

I believe this is the right thread for this sort of thing...

https://twitter.com/ToniKroos/status/815334139142533120

Weaponized Cum
Aug 31, 2004


This post brought to you by the finest Miami cocaine money can buy ----->
https://twitter.com/TrollFootball/status/815282611023015936

Sneaks McDevious
Jul 29, 2010

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Crazy Ted posted:

Reminder that there's a Twitter account dedicated solely to ridiculous Ronay quotes:



huh???



The first one can't be real, surely....

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

julian assflange posted:

The first one can't be real, surely....
You think I'm actually creative enough to make that poo poo up?

Sneaks McDevious
Jul 29, 2010

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Crazy Ted posted:

You think I actually made that poo poo up?

No was thinking more a Ronay Markov Chain

oliwan
Jul 20, 2005

by Nyc_Tattoo
ronay is a ridiculous sports writer, his stuff doesn't even have cult value, it's just overwrought and bad. how he keeps his job at the guardian is beyond me.

well, actually it demonstrates that sports journalism is just horrible overall.

PirateBob
Jun 14, 2003

idgi

Suqit
Apr 25, 2005

Stars Stripes Freedom Jozy
(Jozy not pictured here)

Replace the clubs with their position on the table.

advanced statsman
Dec 26, 2012

ISLAM FC
owned by troll football :troll:

R. Guyovich
Dec 25, 1991

Crazy Ted posted:

I believe this is the right thread for this sort of thing...

https://twitter.com/ToniKroos/status/815334139142533120

absolutely not

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

As if right on cue...

RONAYYYYYYYY!!! posted:

Whatever direction Girouds strangely divisive five-year Arsenal career takes from here, however the clubs hotly-contested modern history ends up remembering him, he is unlikely to have a better moment, in isolation, than the opening goal here. Olivier, old boy, well always have Palace.

What are we calling it then? A Henrikh? A studs-up, reach-back semi-scorpion? Perhaps the greatest no-look donkey-kick breakaway volley youre likely to see outside the pixelated world of early 1990s arcade machines? Certainly Henrikh Mkhitaryan does seem have been on to something with his discovery of the sole-of-the-boot, reach-around volley.

dex_sda
Oct 11, 2012


Spxtz posted:

You might not have seen the current Star Wars movie. In which case I won’t ruin it by revealing any top-secret plot twists, like the imperial weapon‑shield with one small fatal flaw; the return of a bullish, roided-up Darth Vader; or the usual mawkish family stuff that can only be resolved by the violent death of a male parent.

Aside from that you’ll find all the usual things. Infomercial-level acting that doesn’t matter because there are some excellent “fffft” and “zzzzz” weapon noises going on in the background. Good bits where stormtroopers make crackly 1950s‑style small talk just before being killed. And above all the familiar organic landscape of junk, robot-men and animated machines that is the real star of these films and the most obvious reason for the films’ staggering success.

This interaction between machine world and human world is what Star Wars is really all about. Everywhere organic details intrude. The shiny new space station already has a worm in its garbage compactor. The Imperial AT-AT walkers imitate the movements of half‑speed camels and end up being capsized by a few bears with bits of string. The entire opening trilogy rests on whether Darth Vader really is more machine than man or man than machine.

The obvious comparison is with Charles Dickens, franchise juggernaut of a previous age. Dickens’ novels were also full of schmaltz and sentiment. They were also redeemed by this same astonishing imaginative landscape where buildings come alive, people turn into machines, the industrial world intrudes into the world of people, and where the real question in every story is whether the people can both survive and remain recognisably themselves.

All of which is quite a roundabout way of getting on to the glorious return of Yaya Touré.

aahahah

Al2001
Apr 7, 2007

You've gone through at the back

Crazy Ted posted:

As if right on cue...

Olivier, old bean, thanks for the reach around

Al2001 fucked around with this message at 13:10 on Jan 2, 2017

jre
Sep 2, 2011

To the cloud ?



quote:

reach-around volley.

wtf

TheBigAristotle
Feb 8, 2007

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

Grimey Drawer
How it feels to be an American supporter
In response to a specific question raised by a fellow F365 reader several days ago regarding the personal experiences of American supporters of European football clubs, I wrote an email that was so heavily edited that roughly 40% of my original words had been removed.

What was left intact was a very reasoned and cogent if ironic point regarding the nonsense of the notion of a causational relationship between the performance of Swansea and the nationality of the manager. The problem was the email was written specifically in response to that previous prompt and thus the redactions mean that to publish that particular submission under my name without obtaining my permission (or even providing notification) is borderline plagiarism. But this isnt the New York Times, the playing field isnt level and all things being equal its not really the end of the world. (MC We do occasionally cut down long emails, just for ease of reading. Sorry if that offends/annoys, but it doesnt constitute plagiarism. Anyway, lets carry on.)

So, here is what it feels like being an American who has been a passionate dedicated and often drunken supporter of Liverpool for exactly a decade now:

I own three kits. A genuine Carlsberg sponsored red Mascherano beauty that got my rear end saved from a beating seeing the Pogues play Roseland in Manhattan. Bless the scouse heart, but my soul doesnt bleed for the posh boy who took a swing at his WAG and connected with my head instead. Ive got an Alnso. Not a typo, had to go down to the actual post office and convince them it wasntwhatever contraband equates to these days.

But last year I bought a custom one because in my heart of hearts Id like to believe that the player whose time at the club I can most identify with is Lucas. So I spent my $125 to get all the real badges and meaningless tinsel and hopefully the number doesnt fade off in the dryer but thats not what really bothers me about it.

The idea that I could be Lucas, an outsider whose original sin was in his own slightly later words not being a proper Brazilian. A player who simply refused to go away, who despite sometimes facing appalling abuse from the crowd stuck around and has finally earned the respect and the pride that comes along with being referred to as a club servant.

The reality is altogether different. If being an American supporter of Liverpool FC as passionate and dedicated as any fan anywhere has a singular right to be I feel a special closeness with Michael Owen. If I committed any sins (and Owen certainly did) it was in my early 20s and even though Ive repented publicly, the nature of xenophobia means that I also know Ill never be accepted and, in the end, I mostly walk alone.

Is that a rational way to feel? How can I be expected to feel rationally about treated as less equal than having less valid opinions than and finally often being written off as less intelligent than someone else for no other reason than the geographic location of my birth life and maybe death. The simplest most uncomfortable reality is that there is no actual defense for ANY argument thats logic is fundamentally based upon an inherently prejudiced point of view.

What is my experience of being an American supporter of an English football club? Id say that theres no singular experience that can sum it up, because in the end I still support and care about Liverpool as a club (and an ideal; surprise an American socialist) in the face all different types of idiocy. Xenophobia is just racism in blackface; its just as insidious and the emotional trauma it can cause hurts a white middle class American from Washington DC because that American is still a person.

The misogynistic treatment of a female Swede whos a mate and fellow Pool supporter (currently residing in Southhampton of all places) is just as deplorable in a different way for different reasons.
My experience is that there is no experience involving discrimination that does anything but cause feelings of pain, frustration and often times even alienation.
Matthew LFC Washington DC

e: fixed all the weird phone copy/paste nonsense

TheBigAristotle fucked around with this message at 18:53 on Jan 2, 2017

trem_two
Oct 22, 2002

it is better if you keep saying I'm fat, as I will continue to score goals
Fun Shoe

TheBigAristotle posted:

How it feels to be an American supporter

same, but also lmao

Crazy Ted
Jul 29, 2003

TheBigAristotle posted:

If I committed any sins (and Owen certainly did) it was in my early 20s and even though I’ve repented publicly, the nature of xenophobia means that I also know I’ll never be accepted and, in the end, I mostly walk alone.
haha

YOU'LL ALWAYS WALK ALONE, YANK

Lenin Riefenstahl
Sep 18, 2003

That's enough! Out of here, you tubs of beer!

TheBigAristotle posted:

Xenophobia is just racism in blackface; it’s just as insidious and the emotional trauma it can cause hurts a white middle class American from Washington DC because that “American” is still a person.

Oh boy...

straight up brolic
Jan 31, 2007

After all, I was nice in ball,
Came to practice weed scented
Report card like the speed limit

:homebrew::homebrew::homebrew:

The utter lack of self-awareness in "Xenophobia is just racism in blackface" really does it for me

blue footed boobie
Sep 14, 2012


UEFA SUPREMACY

straight up brolic posted:

The utter lack of self-awareness in "Xenophobia is just racism in blackface" really does it for me

#plasticlivesmatter

pik_d
Feb 24, 2006

follow the white dove





TRP Post of the Month October 2021
http://i.imgur.com/mdgjziC.gifv

Sneaks McDevious
Jul 29, 2010

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

I'm going to say wrong thread

Shrapnig
Jan 21, 2005

julian assflange posted:

I'm going to say wrong thread

No.

Arquebus
Feb 19, 2013

julian assflange posted:

I'm going to say wrong thread
Right thread.

PirateBob
Jun 14, 2003

Wtf is this bullshit

Brony Car
May 22, 2014

by Cyrano4747

Why is there so much property damage? That league is financially unsustainable.

jre
Sep 2, 2011

To the cloud ?



JFairfax
Oct 23, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
im the swan dinner

trem_two
Oct 22, 2002

it is better if you keep saying I'm fat, as I will continue to score goals
Fun Shoe
https://www.reddit.com/r/WholesomeGunners/

TheBigAristotle
Feb 8, 2007

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

Grimey Drawer



straight up brolic
Jan 31, 2007

After all, I was nice in ball,
Came to practice weed scented
Report card like the speed limit

:homebrew::homebrew::homebrew:

Cons: atrocious start, obviously.
Pros: we came back and salvaged a point from 3-0 down, while away. That's not something previous squads have been able to do. 2015 Arsenal would've lost this match 4-0.
Yes, we've basically lost the league at this point. But there is a mental toughness to the team that wasn't there in the past.

straight up brolic
Jan 31, 2007

After all, I was nice in ball,
Came to practice weed scented
Report card like the speed limit

:homebrew::homebrew::homebrew:

Why is this sub so negative? Why can't you see the bright side of the result?
I was extremely disappointed 65 minutes in. However i and all of you stayed watching. You believed in the team. When sanchez scored in was hopeful, when perez smashed it in i was delighted and when giroud equalised i was doing the scorpion flick with him.
All of you that are leaving negative "it could of been better" "our title hopes are gone" comments why? Its January. Would anyone of predicted arsenal and city's demise (some would say definitely!) And spurs and Leicester success?
Chelsea look like they'll run away with it. But so did Bournemouth 65 minutes in. Chelsea are good but they're not quite carling. They will slip up. We will catch up. We can do this.
Pessimism gets us no where. I know a lot of you are "realists" but at the end of the day why be like that. The players need our unwavering support. If everyone can get behind them we have a chance. Don't worry about February. We play Chelsea (we will crush them) then two more games. This year lets be positive. We're Gonna win the league We're gonna win the league! Haha maybe not that far but lets not go to extremes.
COYG

straight up brolic
Jan 31, 2007

After all, I was nice in ball,
Came to practice weed scented
Report card like the speed limit

:homebrew::homebrew::homebrew:

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Bogan Krkic
Oct 31, 2010

Swedish style? No.
Yugoslavian style? Of course not.
It has to be Zlatan-style.

straight up brolic posted:

Yes, we've basically lost the league at this point. But there is a mental toughness to the team that wasn't there in the past.

I can't process this thinking in the slightest

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