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Fauxhawk Express posted:
You undersold that. It opens with a Scaffold match featuring Steve Austin and PN F'n News. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZRg88cF9r0 Fun fact. PN News had an ECW match as that gimmick.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 13:00 |
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# ? May 30, 2024 12:56 |
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Testekill posted:Also possible homeless man Harold Howard who claims that he'd be able to beat Royce Gracie on the ground who then attempts some kinda of flippy scissor kick in the main event and just falls flat on the ground. Harold Howard is also the subject of the best tribute I've ever seen. Just watching it gets me pumped up. It features said flippy scissor kick. And a triumph of 80s songwriting. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vaw8t-wOMEA EDIT: OH MY GOD his dance 30 seconds in synchs up with the music as well. I'd forgotten all about that. Just watch this video. DOUBLE EDIT: AND! AND his manager is the biggest kiss-rear end ever, which is even evident from this short video. He copies Howard's warm-up dance for no reason. Also look out for 55 seconds or so in. A fight has been cancelled and Howard is declared the winner. His manager runs to celebrate with him, sees Howard's angry reaction, and swiftly changes his celebration into an angry air punch. It's amazing. JGKing fucked around with this message at 13:35 on Sep 3, 2014 |
# ? Sep 3, 2014 13:31 |
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What are the worst ECW ppvs (not counting WWECW)?
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 14:08 |
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I've never watched it back and was there live, but was UFC 97 as boring as I remember it? I recall being pretty disappointed by the event in general, but that may have been in comparison to the awesome UFC 83 we attended the previous year.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 14:32 |
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CopywrightMMXI posted:What are the worst ECW ppvs (not counting WWECW)? While not a PPV, House Party 1996 was one of the most dire wrestling events I have ever seen. Just so boring.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 15:09 |
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I was in attendance at Survivor Series 2006 and it was my first and only PPV so far. Maybe it was just me but the whole show was boring as sin. The matches felt bland and uninteresting and it also had the incredibly uncomfortable and lovely ending of Lita's WWE career where Cryme Time sold her personal belongings (I'm almost certain they implied they were selling her sex toys too but I could be remembering wrong) and she's mocked out of the building.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 15:14 |
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OldTennisCourt posted:I was in attendance at Survivor Series 2006 and it was my first and only PPV so far. Maybe it was just me but the whole show was boring as sin. The matches felt bland and uninteresting and it also had the incredibly uncomfortable and lovely ending of Lita's WWE career where Cryme Time sold her personal belongings (I'm almost certain they implied they were selling her sex toys too but I could be remembering wrong) and she's mocked out of the building. IIRC, they didn't imply so much as actually pulled a vibrator out of a box.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 15:39 |
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Over the Limit 2011 is probably the worst WWE PPV of the last few years. Here was the undercard. R-Truth vs. Rey Mysterio Ezekial Jackson vs. Wade Barrett Sin Cara vs. Chavo Big Show and Kane vs. Mason Ryan and CM Punk Brie Bella vs. Kelly Kelly Randy Orton vs Christian (probably the only good match on the card) Then you had Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole in a kiss my foot match. The image of Michael Cole, covered in BBQ sauce, sucking on Jerry lawler's crusty old foot will forever haunt me. And then the main event: Cena vs. The Miz in an "I quit" match. This match is now referred to as "The Passion of the Cena". For several weeks the Miz hyped up that he had a strategy that no one had ever thought of before that would guarantee that he would win. That strategy ended up being having Alex Riley coming out to help him beat up Cena. That's it. The match went on forever, with Cena being beaten and tied up, but always NEVER GIVING UP. Then Cena did his typical magically no selling and beating both guys with about 10 seconds of offense.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 15:52 |
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Death By Yogurt posted:And then the main event: Cena vs. The Miz in an "I quit" match. This match is now referred to as "The Passion of the Cena". For several weeks the Miz hyped up that he had a strategy that no one had ever thought of before that would guarantee that he would win. That strategy ended up being having Alex Riley coming out to help him beat up Cena. That's it. The match went on forever, with Cena being beaten and tied up, but always NEVER GIVING UP. Then Cena did his typical magically no selling and beating both guys with about 10 seconds of offense. "Passion of the Cena" was Orton/Cena I Quit, and I think Miz's special strategy was to use a tape recorder with Cena saying "I Quit" on it, which worked until Riley dropped it right in front of the ref. It was still a really bad match though.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 16:00 |
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Death By Yogurt posted:Over the Limit 2011 is probably the worst WWE PPV of the last few years. Was there a Savage tribute on this show? I'm pretty sure Punk did a Savage Elbow Drop but I have a feeling no-one noticed.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 16:08 |
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My favorite line about early UFC comes from a cracked article (yes, I know) and is basically 'At this point in MMA's history we were still expecting a monk to come down from the mountains and start throwing Kamehamehas around."Dias posted:IIRC, they didn't imply so much as actually pulled a vibrator out of a box. EDIT: Also that Harold Howard tribute video has my favorite youtube comment on it quote:Joey Hardy2 weeks ago Would love to play some Call of Duty with that guy.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 16:21 |
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Great White Hope posted:"Passion of the Cena" was Orton/Cena I Quit, and I think Miz's special strategy was to use a tape recorder with Cena saying "I Quit" on it, which worked until Riley dropped it right in front of the ref. Nonono. Miz specifically announces before the match that his secret strategy was to have Alex Riley help him "since the match is no DQ" essentially making it a handicap match. The tape recorder thing came in as a last result after 20 minutes of relentlessly beating on Cena. All of this combined to make Miz losing especially humiliating. Another highlight of OtL'11 was that Ezekiel Jackson would not stop body slamming Wade Barrett in their match, as his programming was skipping and it was the only thing he could do on repeat. As bad as 2011 was, 2010 was pretty bad too Over the Limit 2010 had: - CM Punk losing the rubber match of his Mysterio feud in what was probably the best match of the night. This led to Rey shaving his head and somehow managing to slice him wide open with an electric razor. This led to Punk's head being covered in an obviously blood-soaked towel until he could make it backstage and Punk wearing the lucha mask for a period of a few months(which granted was pretty great). - Swagger vs. Big Show for the WHC, the build of which had Big Show no-selling Swagger as a legitimate threat. The match didn't help Swagger look any better as he ended it in DQ to keep the title. - Edge vs. Orton goes to a double count-out when Orton dislocates his own arm doing his taunt and the end of the match has to be changed on a fly, and the best they come up with is "Both guys knock each other out on the outside". - Cena vs. Batista in an "I Quit" match, which ends with Batista running Cena over with a car, Cena no-selling it and AA'ing Batista off the top of the car through the stage.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 16:24 |
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CopywrightMMXI posted:What are the worst ECW ppvs (not counting WWECW)? All of them were pretty bad with good to great main events.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 16:26 |
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Uncensored '96 was a pretty bad PPV. Eddie/Konnan was a good match to start the night with, but the matches get worse as the night goes on. Finlay/Regal was second on the card and good. After that it's Colonel Parker vs. Madusa. That went as well as expected. Booty Man vs. DDP spent about 90% of the match playing to the crowd and not you know, wrestling. Sting and Booker T wrestled the Road Warriors in a half hour street foght, which ran way too long. Oh and the ME had a few cages in it.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 16:41 |
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Testekill posted:Still though, UFC 9 had the worst fight I've ever seen in Shamrock vs Severn. Ah yes, the 30 minute "Dance in Detroit"
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 16:56 |
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ayn rand hand job posted:Booty Man vs. DDP spent about 90% of the match playing to the crowd and not you know, wrestling.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:12 |
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LightsGameraAction posted:As bad as 2011 was, 2010 was pretty bad too Over the Limit 2010... I was there. It was a real bad PPV and permanently put me off WWE live events aside from a future trip to Wrestlemania (and maybe a Rumble). The opener also featured R-Truth giving Ted DiBiase a concussion with a particularly vigorous slap. Rey/Punk and the tag title matches were the only highlights. Endorph posted:Would love to play some Call of Duty with that guy. Looks like his fighting system involves a hammer and vehicular assault. Wikipedia posted:On December 22, 2009 Howard was charged with two counts of attempted murder, two counts of assault with a weapon, attempted breaking and entering, failure to remain, flight from police, dangerous operation of a motor vehicle, mischief and two counts breach of recognizance after being captured by police. The events leading to said arrest include attacking his sister and nephew with a hammer, attempting to force his way into his estranged wife's home, and finally crashing his car into the Fallsview Casino. In the end, Harold was sentenced to just shy of five years in prison.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:21 |
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Endless Mike posted:So a standard Ed Leslie match? With the addition DDP hamming it up because it was a match for the services of Kimberly.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:30 |
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I've never actually seen UFC 9 but how bad was the whole no-closed fists thing?quote:The special rules included no closed fisted strikes to the head and no headbutts – a rule that referee John McCarthy attempted to enforce, but with little success. Before the show, fighters were warned not to use closed fisted strikes under penalty of arrest. Although many fights that night included closed fisted striking, no fighters were arrested. Because that sounds loving retarded
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:31 |
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Yuriy posted:I've never actually seen UFC 9 but how bad was the whole no-closed fists thing? Was that the one where Shamrock and Severn had a hugging match?
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:33 |
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Yuriy posted:I've never actually seen UFC 9 but how bad was the whole no-closed fists thing? Mostly nobody gave a poo poo, there were blatant strikes with a closed fist as well as headbutts that were similarly banned that McCarthy tried to enforce to no much success. Nobody got arrested either. Really the only dudes that got scared by it seemed to be Severn and Shamrock and welp
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:38 |
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I've only just recently become aware of the fact that UFC, now a prestigious and well-regulated mainstream sports promotion, basically started out a few steps above bum fights.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:44 |
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Maxwell Lord posted:a prestigious and well-regulated mainstream sports promotion lol
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:48 |
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Maxwell Lord posted:I've only just recently become aware of the fact that UFC, now a prestigious and well-regulated mainstream sports promotion, basically started out a few steps above bum fights. But just barely. Jon "Scientific Aggression Fighting Technology of America" Hess won his first UFC fight ever against the owner of Dallas' own Totally Nude Steakhouse.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 17:49 |
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For my money I would put any of the early PRIDE shows up against the worst the UFC has to offer. PRIDE.1 famously pit UFC retreads (who could actually fight) against UWFi pro wrestlers (who could not) all in an attempt to salvage something from the Rickson/Takada feud that had already put the UWFi's second-biggest star in the hospital. Thrill as:
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 18:14 |
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Most of the candidates people are bringing up have self-evident, easy to grok explanations for why they are bad. So-and-so was on drugs, X number of matches featuring people that can't work, etc. The short answer to "Why is New Blood Rising the worst PPV ever" is that it was so overbooked and so obsessed with shooting that you basically had no idea what your response was supposed to be to anything that was going on. People will say things like "5 words: Judy Bagwell on a forklift" but that doesn't really get into why that is terrible. It seems self-evident, but it's so much deeper than that. First: why is she on a forklift? There's multiple levels to this. "Why?" in the sense of "what is the reasoning behind having her on a forklift at ringside rather than like sitting at the announce table or something?", but also "why?" in the sense of "What exactly does this stipulation in the match mean for the match itself?" You don't win by racing to the top of the forklift with her, for example like in a viagra on a pole match. She's not a weapon, like a coal miner's glove on a pole match. This then also fails to recognize that the match features a run-in by David Arquette. Again, you read "run-in by David Arquette" and assume that that's enough by itself to make a match terrible, but again that's not even the whole picture. He wasn't around for months before then, so why come back now? And of course, it also leaves out the fact that OF COURSE this leads to a heel turn by him (which again, also doesn't make sense since everyone already hated him legitimately) in yet another swerve-for-swerve's sake. Almost every match (even the opening ladder match) suffers from these problems, combined of course with the standard complaint of the actual wrestling in the matches also being terrible.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 18:16 |
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Yuriy posted:I've never actually seen UFC 9 but how bad was the whole no-closed fists thing? Who wouldn't want to pay money for three hours of grown men bitch slapping each other
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 18:56 |
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Mr. Carlisle posted:Who wouldn't want to pay money for three hours of grown men slapping each other 209 bitch 209 Yuriy fucked around with this message at 18:59 on Sep 3, 2014 |
# ? Sep 3, 2014 18:56 |
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Yuriy posted:209 bitch 209 I would pay for any PPV that had Nick Diaz slapping someone for three hours. The older UFC PPV shows sound like something my teenage self would have thought was the most amazing thing. See a sumo wrestler fight a kickboxer! A boxer fighting a karate blackbelt! In theory it really does sound pretty drat rad. And then you see how they promoted it and how it ended up and it's just weird and sad. But without that ridiculous era we wouldn't have modern UFC and the even more hilarious (but somewhat less sad and more regulated) events that come out of it so there's that.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 19:03 |
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Didn't UFC 1 have a match where a blackbelt came out in a full on white gi and got completely demolished in seconds?
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 19:05 |
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the best thing about early UFCs is that they proved that none of those bullshit martial arts are real and that the best fighters are impoverished favela dwelling bjj dudes and corn-fed american wrasslers with eveything else being a fraud
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 19:07 |
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Let's go back to 1996, to WWF's In Your House: Beware of Dog. IYHs were a 2-hour Sunday night PPV at a "discount" price of $19.99. Free-for-All Tag Team Titles Match (on the TV Guide/Preview channel, if I remember right): The Godwinns vs. The Smoking Gunns Sunny fooled poor old Phineas into getting rolled up by her new crush Billy Gunn in a bullshit match. WILDMAN Marc Mero vs. The Blueblood Hunter Hearst Helmsley Good match, if I remember right, but Good LORD, the stupid loving gimmmicks. Then the screen turns blue. The cable company is closed (Sunday night in 1996, remember), so I have no clue what's happening. But we're paying for it, so... I have no idea. We just left the TV on, and the show came back on about an hour or so later. The hosts explain there was a power outage, and the card had continued for the crowd in the dark. But no mention of what would happen to those paying customers at home. On with the show! WWF Title Match: Shawn Michaels vs. The British Bulldog, Davey Boy Smith Decent match, but it was wayyyy overdone with the forced legal "drama" and stuff with Diana. So, after waiting through the blue-out, and not being sure if we'd get a refund or whatever, we get a bullshit double-pin finish. gently caress you. Then, the next night on Raw, they explain they'd have a make-up PPV on Tuesday night, and explained the finishes to each of the matches that took place in the dark, effectively telegraphing the finishes. What the Christ? I'm trying to remember how this went, but I think, on Tuesday, they start the make-up PPV with the taped matches again. Then... Caribbean Strap Match: Savio Vega vs. Steve Austin: If Austin loses, DiBiase quits! This match was good for a strap match, but it's still a Savio Vega match with the finish given away. Yokozuna vs. Vader Bad, bad match featuring two giant fat guys, and you don't even get to see Cornette get his comeuppance. Casket Match for the Intercontinental Title: Goldust vs. Undertaker Meh match that ends with a "Mankind hiding in the casket" finish. So, on tape, this might not be a bad show, but on live PPV, this was a loving disaster.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 19:29 |
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OldTennisCourt posted:Didn't UFC 1 have a match where a blackbelt came out in a full on white gi and got completely demolished in seconds? Which one? There were a few guys in Gis that go their poo poo ruined. UFC 2 or had the American Ninjitsu guy get awkwardly choked out by a kickboxer.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 20:13 |
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OldTennisCourt posted:Didn't UFC 1 have a match where a blackbelt came out in a full on white gi and got completely demolished in seconds? You're thinking of Fred Ettish, though UFC 2 had a karateka and K-1 fighter who got poo poo on by Royce
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 20:13 |
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coconono posted:Which one? There were a few guys in Gis that go their poo poo ruined. Pat Smith proved that in the land of the blind the man with one halfassed guillotine choke is king Iirc he went on to be ambushed by Tank Abbots hangers on at UU 96
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 20:15 |
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jpmeyer posted:Most of the candidates people are bringing up have self-evident, easy to grok explanations for why they are bad. So-and-so was on drugs, X number of matches featuring people that can't work, etc. This is all very true. Like, Judy Bagwell is just up there on a forklift screaming her head off. It's so awkward and adds nothing other than maybe a vague sense of "Oh man Kanyon is gonna sleep with her if he wins. Oh boy". And I loving FORGOT about the Arquette run-in, because gently caress man. Yes former WCW World Heavyweight Champion David Arquette does a heel run in on the Judy Bagwell on a forklift match. Best part? he fails to help Kanyon win and gets beat up by The Stuff as a result.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 20:33 |
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Julio Cesar Fatass posted:For my money I would put any of the early PRIDE shows up against the worst the UFC has to offer. The rest of the card is okay by early-MMA standards, but Pride 2 has one of my favorite things ever in the sport: Royler Gracie vs Naoki Sano, a 33-minute fight so uneventful and boring that you can hear commentators Bas Rutten and Stephen Quadros audibly going through the various stages of grief as it wears on, first reacting with confusion at the inaction, then anger that Royler is clearly the better fighter and isn't doing anything, and finally giving up on the match entirely and doing dueling Al Pacino impersonations.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 20:54 |
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CarlCX posted:The rest of the card is okay by early-MMA standards, but Pride 2 has one of my favorite things ever in the sport: Royler Gracie vs Naoki Sano, a 33-minute fight so uneventful and boring that you can hear commentators Bas Rutten and Stephen Quadros audibly going through the various stages of grief as it wears on, first reacting with confusion at the inaction, then anger that Royler is clearly the better fighter and isn't doing anything, and finally giving up on the match entirely and doing dueling Al Pacino impersonations. And if I recall correctly Bas at one point lets it slip that the commentary is not live at all. PRIDE took some time getting a PPV contract in the United States, and when they aired their earlier events they tried to maintain an illusion of the commentary having been recorded live at the events. During the fight in question, Bas at some point bemoans the fact that that nothing has happened for the last 15 minutes and nothing will continue to happen for the next 15 minutes, to which his co-commentator Stephen Quadros goes in for some half-assed save. They let it air regardless. A better example of the announcer fuckery was when Bas in-studio suddenly noticed himself getting up into the ring for some post-fight brouhaha with a teammate and had to "excuse himself", leaving the Fight Professor to handle post-fight commentary all by himself.
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 23:27 |
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Bushmeister posted:A better example of the announcer fuckery was when Bas in-studio suddenly noticed himself getting up into the ring for some post-fight brouhaha with a teammate and had to "excuse himself", leaving the Fight Professor to handle post-fight commentary all by himself. I watched Pride long before I ever got into MMA in general so I remember a few great announcer moments. The best is in Pride 3, where Quadros is watching Amir Rahnavardi get massacred by Gary Goodridge and talking about how Amir called him saying that he'd lost this fight. Bas just sighs and goes "Okay, now they have to cut this. You're right here."
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# ? Sep 3, 2014 23:45 |
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# ? May 30, 2024 12:56 |
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Bushmeister posted:And if I recall correctly Bas at one point lets it slip that the commentary is not live at all. PRIDE took some time getting a PPV contract in the United States, and when they aired their earlier events they tried to maintain an illusion of the commentary having been recorded live at the events. During the fight in question, Bas at some point bemoans the fact that that nothing has happened for the last 15 minutes and nothing will continue to happen for the next 15 minutes, to which his co-commentator Stephen Quadros goes in for some half-assed save. They let it air regardless. This makes me sad. I was hoping that both of them immediately catching on to Coleman taking a dive against Takada was live.
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# ? Sep 4, 2014 01:09 |