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Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


Tentative dream burg:

I have two patties in mind.

One, a chickpea and herbed goat cheese stuffed crispy patty crusted with seasoned panko.

Two, a ground 80% lean 20% fat chuck and flap meat combo ground medium coarse, seasoned with strong, smoky Syrian spices and lightly studded with bulghur, ala kibbeh.

Herby sheep's milk labneh on the side, with a side relish of spicy carrot, beet and onion pickle. Muhamara optional, along with lettuce, paper thin tomato, raw onion and cucumber.

Kabis--pickles and olives--on the side.

The bun is a thick Syrian style pita, warmed and toasted.

Comes with fries the fries are cursed.


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Dick Bastardly

Muttley is SKYNET!!!

hamjobs posted:

Tentative dream burg:

I have two patties in mind.

One, a chickpea and herbed goat cheese stuffed crispy patty crusted with seasoned panko.

Two, a ground 80% lean 20% fat chuck and flap meat combo ground medium coarse, seasoned with strong, smoky Syrian spices and lightly studded with bulghur, ala kibbeh.

Herby sheep's milk labneh on the side, with a side relish of spicy carrot, beet and onion pickle. Muhamara optional, along with lettuce, paper thin tomato, raw onion and cucumber.

Kabis--pickles and olives--on the side.

The bun is a thick Syrian style pita, warmed and toasted.

Comes with fries the fries are cursed.

yas


Awesome winter sig by Symbolic, love it!

Lovely sig by the masterful Matoi Ryuko, thanks!

blaise rascal

"Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Pearl...."
The ingredients are bought and the cooking will commence in a moment!


ty vanisher, ty khanstant

blaise rascal

"Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Pearl...."
Secret Radioactive Peruvian Danger Burgers

Beans and quinoa are two ingredients very frequently used to make vegan burgers. But they have something else in common – they are both staples of traditional Peruvian cuisine. Let’s use this fact as an inspiration to make fully Peruvian-themed vegan burgers!

The patties stick together thanks to wheat gluten flour, also known as vital wheat gluten. This is an ingredient often used in the vegan burger recipes by chef Robin Robertson, which I have made very often, and which I referenced frequently while designing these burgers.

The sauce is inspired by the Peruvian national dish, ceviche, which consists of seafood marinated in lime juice and peppers. Blending lime juice, peppers, and vegan mayo ingredients (including cashews) leads to a flavorful aioli, hopefully with a similar flavor profile to ceviche.

The toppings are just a bunch of pan-roasted vegetables. (My research indicates that Peruvian cuisine is heavily influenced by many cultures, so there are a ton of foods that could be considered to be authentically Peruvian – so I erred on the side of the veggies that were available at my supermarket and that seemed good on a burger.)

The side dish is corn, cooked in the same pan as the other roasted vegetables.

Quinoa & Black Bean Burgers
1 can black beans, drained and rinsed
About 1/6 of an onion, chopped up a little
1 cup wheat gluten flour
1/4 cup soy sauce
30 twists of a little black pepper grinder
1 cup cooked quinoa
olive oil for frying
Bag of whichever buns look the tastiest at the supermarket

Blend the beans, quinoa, and onion in a food processor, until well mixed but still a little chunky. Add the wheat gluten flour, soy sauce, and pepper, and blend again until it's got a consistent texture. Remove and shape into about 6 patties. Place on a plate and refrigerate for 20 minutes.

After refrigerating, fry the burgers in a thin layer of oil over medium heat for about 5 minutes per side. Also, use the same pan to toast one side of each of the buns, again in a thin layer of olive oil. To make up a burger, put a patty in a bun, add some topping veggies, and ladle on a spoonful of aioli sauce.

Pan-Roasted Topping Veggies
1 poblano pepper, left whole
2 roma tomatoes, left whole
½ an onion, sliced into ½ inch thick discs
½ a sweet potato, sliced into ½ inch thick discs
5 cloves of garlic, left whole (but with the hard part of the clove at the bottom chopped off)
Also 2 ears of corn for a side dish, with all the husks removed except the innermost husks next to the corn kernels

To pan roast these vegetables, simply heat a pan over medium-high heat and add the veggies (without oil), then cook until they have pretty black sear marks. Flip them over as necessary; the goal is to maximize contact between the pan and the surface of the veggies. Add salt and pepper as desired.

The corn may require more thorough cooking, so I like to cook it with a lid on the pan – again, until it has black marks all the way around the outside.

When the veggies are finished, prepare them to be toppings for a burger. Stem and seed the poblano, and cut it into strips. Chop up the tomatoes (careful, there will be a lot of juice). Remove the skin from the garlic but leave whole. Chop the sweet potato into more manageable pieces. Shuck the corn and pull off the hairs. (I personally like corn plain, but you are welcome to serve it with some combination of salt, pepper, lime juice, and vegan butter.) When handling all these vegetables, and especially the poblano, be careful because they may be hot inside.

Vegan Lime-Pepper Aioli
1 stemmed & seeded pepper (andean peppers are most authentic but my supermarket had serranos, so I used those instead)
3 tbsp lime juice
½ cup roasted & salted cashews (raw cashews are better but my supermarket does not carry them)
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
½ tsp mustard
1 tbsp water

Blend all ingredients.

Photos:



The verdict:
Usually when I cook for myself, the food I make is very simple, and this time around I went way too far in the opposite direction! 5 toppings for a burger is overkill when none of the toppings is flat; next time I might limit myself to just the peppers and onions.

The burger patties were fine.

I liked the aioli pretty well, and I can see myself enjoying it on dishes other than these burgers, like salads or other sandwiches. I do think the texture AND flavor could have been improved by using an ingredient other than roasted cashews; perhaps soaked raw cashews or raw silken tofu would have been better.

e: on second thought the patties are too salty. I’ve adjusted the recipe!

blaise rascal fucked around with this message at 13:44 on Jan 21, 2019


ty vanisher, ty khanstant

Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


blaise rascal posted:

Secret Radioactive Peruvian Danger Burgers

Beans and quinoa are two ingredients very frequently used to make vegan burgers. But they have something else in common – they are both staples of traditional Peruvian cuisine. Let’s use this fact as an inspiration to make fully Peruvian-themed vegan burgers!

The patties stick together thanks to wheat gluten flour, also known as vital wheat gluten. This is an ingredient often used in the vegan burger recipes by chef Robin Robertson, which I have made very often, and which I referenced frequently while designing these burgers.

The sauce is inspired by the Peruvian national dish, ceviche, which consists of seafood marinated in lime juice and peppers. Blending lime juice, peppers, and vegan mayo ingredients (including cashews) leads to a flavorful aioli, hopefully with a similar flavor profile to ceviche.

The toppings are just a bunch of pan-roasted vegetables. (My research indicates that Peruvian cuisine is heavily influenced by many cultures, so there are a ton of foods that could be considered to be authentically Peruvian – so I erred on the side of the veggies that were available at my supermarket and that seemed good on a burger.)

The side dish is corn, cooked in the same pan as the other roasted vegetables.

Quinoa & Black Bean Burgers
1 can black beans, drained and rinsed
About 1/6 of an onion, chopped up a little
1 cup wheat gluten flour
1/4 cup soy sauce
30 twists of a little black pepper grinder
½ tsp onion salt
1 cup cooked quinoa
olive oil for frying
Bag of whichever buns look the tastiest at the supermarket

Blend the beans, quinoa, and onion in a food processor, until well mixed but still a little chunky. Add the wheat gluten flour, soy sauce, salt, and pepper, and blend again until it's got a consistent texture. Remove and shape into about 6 patties. Place on a plate and refrigerate for 20 minutes.

After refrigerating, fry the burgers in a thin layer of oil over medium heat for about 5 minutes per side. Also, use the same pan to toast one side of each of the buns, again in a thin layer of olive oil. To make up a burger, put a patty in a bun, add some topping veggies, and ladle on a spoonful of aioli sauce.

Pan-Roasted Topping Veggies
1 poblano pepper, left whole
2 roma tomatoes, left whole
½ an onion, sliced into ½ inch thick discs
½ a sweet potato, sliced into ½ inch thick discs
5 cloves of garlic, left whole (but with the hard part of the clove at the bottom chopped off)
Also 2 ears of corn for a side dish, with all the husks removed except the innermost husks next to the corn kernels

To pan roast these vegetables, simply heat a pan over medium-high heat and add the veggies (without oil), then cook until they have pretty black sear marks. Flip them over as necessary; the goal is to maximize contact between the pan and the surface of the veggies. Add salt and pepper as desired.

The corn may require more thorough cooking, so I like to cook it with a lid on the pan – again, until it has black marks all the way around the outside.

When the veggies are finished, prepare them to be toppings for a burger. Stem and seed the poblano, and cut it into strips. Chop up the tomatoes (careful, there will be a lot of juice). Remove the skin from the garlic but leave whole. Chop the sweet potato into more manageable pieces. Shuck the corn and pull off the hairs. (I personally like corn plain, but you are welcome to serve it with some combination of salt, pepper, lime juice, and vegan butter.) When handling all these vegetables, and especially the poblano, be careful because they may be hot inside.

Vegan Lime-Pepper Aioli
1 stemmed & seeded pepper (andean peppers are most authentic but my supermarket had serranos, so I used those instead)
3 tbsp lime juice
½ cup roasted & salted cashews (raw cashews are better but my supermarket does not carry them)
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
½ tsp mustard
1 tbsp water

Blend all ingredients.

Photos:



The verdict:
Usually when I cook for myself, the food I make is very simple, and this time around I went way too far in the opposite direction! 5 toppings for a burger is overkill when none of the toppings is flat; next time I might limit myself to just the peppers and onions.

The burger patties were fine.

I liked the aioli pretty well, and I can see myself enjoying it on dishes other than these burgers, like salads or other sandwiches. I do think the texture AND flavor could have been improved by using an ingredient other than roasted cashews; perhaps soaked raw cashews or raw silken tofu would have been better.

This is delightful and deadly and I'm proud of you. 35/10 A+


blaise rascal

"Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Pearl...."

hamjobs posted:

This is delightful and deadly and I'm proud of you. 35/10 A+
Thanks so much! I don't think of myself as much of a chef, but I definitely had fun with this.

The most interesting part for me was the sauce. I'm fascinated by sauce in general, and convinced that the presence of a made-from-scratch sauce is often what separates good cooking from great cooking. I think this is especially true for vegan cooking because vegan foods tend to lack the strong savory flavor present in meat, cheese, and eggs.

A few more post-cooking thoughts:

-Of the 6 veggies I pan-roasted, the only one I would not pan roast in the future is the sweet potato. I really think that to prevent sweet potato from drying out, you need to seal it in foil or boil it or something.
-If I'm using onions as a topping then I probably don't need to also put onions IN the burger. A little onion powder might be enough to give the burgers the correct oniony flavor.
-I think the burgers actually ended up a little too salty, so I've edited the recipe to omit the onion salt. Feel free to add it back in if you like salty foods!


ty vanisher, ty khanstant

Manifisto


blaise rascal posted:

Secret Radioactive Peruvian Danger Burgers

nice!

are those pretzel buns? whatever they are they look good.

blaise rascal

"Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Pearl...."

Manifisto posted:

nice!

are those pretzel buns? whatever they are they look good.
yeah! i selected them based on the criterion that they were the tastiest looking bunnies at the supermarket


ty vanisher, ty khanstant

Manifisto


bump

deadline is approaching, people

monkay

The official sad poster
Hamberder

Randy Travesty

PHANTOM QUEEN


I'm fighting my own brain, so I may extend the deadline a bit just because I'm dealing with Dumb Brain Syndrome and I know a lot of people are, right now.

But seriously make a loving BURG.


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Looke

sizzle

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