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Yeah, I think I could only fight 1 and it's gonna take a little while to pin him down for the colossal noogie it's about to get
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Sep 27, 2019 13:52
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What if ewoks and java are the same species? Both are small, speak incomprehensible language and have impressive and almost inborn aptitude with technology, and for all we know javas are hairy AF under those cloaks.
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Sep 27, 2019 14:03
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Robokomodo posted:Personally think I could take on at least 10 Ewoks in a fight. They’re like 3’ right? Yeah but the two tree trunks that swing down and hit you simultaneously in the rear end and dick are at least 15' each
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Sep 27, 2019 14:05
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wait, the rear end and the dick? what kinda trees are these? e: nevermind, I just understood that you meant that the trees are gonna sandwhich your parts. Haha, reading comprehension much?
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Sep 27, 2019 14:08
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the kind your rear end and dick really hate
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Sep 27, 2019 14:10
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I imagined a large boomerang that hits you in the butt and then flies back to get your front, it's absurd, but that's where my mind went
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Sep 27, 2019 14:11
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could work, what with the cgi nowadays
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Sep 27, 2019 14:13
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Michael Bay presents Exploding Dick Boomerang Trees, coming to a theater near you
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Sep 27, 2019 14:14
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Colonel Cancer posted:What if ewoks and java are the same species? Both are small, speak incomprehensible language and have impressive and almost inborn aptitude with technology, and for all we know javas are hairy AF under those cloaks. Ewoks don't have glowing eyes, you fake rear end nerd. You absolute fool.
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Sep 27, 2019 14:44
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Plus, you can't juice an Ewok, that'd be gross as hell, whereas Jawa juice is good poo poo 
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Sep 27, 2019 15:35
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pop fly to McGillicutty posted:Ewoks don't have glowing eyes, you fake rear end nerd. You absolute fool. He said java, not to be confused with Jawa. Trap sprung. Talk about owned. Look how owned you are. Everyone point and laugh!
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Sep 27, 2019 16:09
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Staaaar cruiser.....star cruiser crash crash. Wwwweerrrr wwweeerrrrr crash.
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Sep 27, 2019 16:11
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'Toronto, gosh!' is Ewok for 'feeble whitey' and refers to the pitiful stormtrooper
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Sep 27, 2019 16:15
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I had no idea wtf Jawas looked like under their cloaks apparently it's this 
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Sep 27, 2019 16:26
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filthy creatures
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Sep 27, 2019 16:34
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Tom Gorman posted:I had no idea wtf Jawas looked like under their cloaks That's a swamp booger from Yoda's planet.
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Sep 27, 2019 16:34
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snergle posted:what race were the ewoks a caricature of? They we're obviously the Vietcong, it's a very political movie for it's time
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Sep 27, 2019 16:44
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Roundup Ready posted:They we're obviously the Vietcong, it's a very political movie for it's time I always thought the scene where Imperial Jane Fonda took photos with the ewoks was an odd departure
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Sep 27, 2019 17:26
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Day 1 Brief squad on objectives to complete Operation Black Fur. Two weeks patrolling the western edge of the perimeter taking out entrenched enemy positions and locating stolen armor units that have been used to harass neighboring villages. Orders are to engage the enemy on sight and gather intel when possible. Dropping into the canopy, a silence. Some bird chatter but not much else. We keep our heads down and gear up as the ship lifts off. Formation down the trail is PFC Qetup, PV2 Tupio up front scouting, then me, SPCs Smitp and Zane on the heavy blasters behind me, and in the rear my man Sandy is overseeing 5 new fresh meat recruits. I hope they make it. A little bit down the trail some of our wounded being tended to. "..ambushed last night..". Blasters. The fuckers had blasters. Some dead off the trail, about 25. The new men are suddenly paying attention. We move on and Qetup and Tupio are on high alert. We all are. Our current objective is Ypoon river by dusk. Tupio sees a mess of tracks leading towards the mountain. We abandon our current objective and follow, thinking we can meet the river at a point farther east. Creeping up to a ridge our scouts give the signal to stop. We got a bead on the bastards. Qedup comes back to me. "Sir, 13 'woks, blasters and bows, maybe explosives. Call in the heat sir, they're eating another one of ours. Don't let the new guys see." I call Sandy up and use coms to call in Precision Radial Orbital Laser Atomizing Napalm on their position. A brown beam instantly appears in a column between the sky and the ground in front of us. A second later the temperature of the air rises to a scorching heat and a weak cry of "Mana-tutu" is heard briefly. The beam ceases and sick black smoke pours down the ridge smelling of burnt fur and flesh. Burning wood and vegetation. The dirt is on fire in front 100 yards up the ridge. A 'wok comes stumbling out of the perimeter of the flames on our right side. He's burning alive. How did he survive? "gently caress, get him! Get him!" All of the new guys start firing exited to get one. They blast the poo poo out that fucker. I tell them to stop. It's over.
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Sep 27, 2019 17:28
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Tom Gorman posted:I had no idea wtf Jawas looked like under their cloaks OO TI NI
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Sep 27, 2019 17:49
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Tom Gorman posted:I had no idea wtf Jawas looked like under their cloaks Brb, loading up Jedi Academy so I can slice a bunch of Jawas on that Tatooine level.
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Sep 27, 2019 17:57
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Tom Gorman posted:I had no idea wtf Jawas looked like under their cloaks Is this canon?
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Sep 27, 2019 17:58
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Ewoks are sentient, right? So they can consent?
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Sep 27, 2019 22:25
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bird with big dick posted:Ewoks are sentient, right? So they can consent? If an Ewok and a Wookiee mated could they make an infertile offspring, like a mule
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Sep 27, 2019 22:29
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I just think the empire should have won and the imperial storm troopers should have made racist remarks about ewoks.
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Sep 27, 2019 22:32
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Hammerite posted:If an Ewok and a Wookiee mated could they make an infertile offspring, like a mule I believe it's called an Ewook if the dad is an Ewok, and a Wok if the mom is a Wookiee.
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Sep 27, 2019 22:35
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BrigadierSensible posted:Ewoks are awesome. I like that they are cutesy teddy bears. In the context of the Star Wars movies I like that they are weird little tribal pygmies, (ignoring all the problematic aspects of having tiny midget forest dwelling humanoids that are technologically backward and talk in gibberish whilst catching outsiders and cooking them in a pot.) I like that they are from the era of practical effects, i.e. people in suits. If they were done today, CGI Ewoks would be awful. I also like the idea that an invading foreign force, no matter how more technologically advanced, cannot defeat locals who know the terrain, and are prepared to fight harder and with more heart than mercenaries/conscripts that just want to go home. The walker robot getting crushed by logs was cool, as was the other walker robot tripping on the logs. I really liked Star Wars Battlefront 2, the old version, where if you played really well you got to play as a hero. I remember kicking some serious rear end and getting to play as Darth Vader on Endor, slaughtering rebels with him until he suddenly knelt down defeated, an ewok spear in the back of his head.
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Sep 27, 2019 23:04
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I think a macaulay culkin / ewok crossover version of home alone 5 where they just wailed on deadpool with homemade traps would be pretty good
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Sep 27, 2019 23:15
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ewok step mom, loving bratty son -- surprising creampie
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Sep 28, 2019 00:08
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milkingmycow posted:Day 1 Hoo yea get some boys! smoke those whiskeys!
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Sep 28, 2019 00:09
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curvy ewok porg earns treats from rebel pilot
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Sep 28, 2019 00:11
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Ewoks were the first Jar Jar
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Sep 28, 2019 00:14
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The Dregs posted:I have a friend who once told me that he really loves everything about the Transformers movies, except for the fact that they always kind of seemed that they were made for kids. It bothered him that a movie about toy cars that turn into robots seemed like it was made for kids. I got the distinct impression from Rogue One that it was a movie made for Star Wars fans whose tastes were starting to mature beyond Star Wars, but instead of expanding their palette they merely wanted their Star Wars to continue catering to their tastes. In some ways I'd say The Godfather is the Star Wars for adults (on the family dynasty drama side of things) and I once joked they'd eventually make The Star Wars Godfather Trilogy, but thinking about it some more I can actually see that happening even if not literally. Hell, The Dark Knight was arguably already a step in that direction. (Check out my Godfather thread, btw! https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3896228)
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Sep 28, 2019 00:40
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Are ewoks the thing in the suck my dick gif? Thanks I'll hang up and listen
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Sep 28, 2019 00:48
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OP is not a good poster
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Sep 28, 2019 00:58
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vyst posted:Are ewoks the thing in the suck my dick gif? That's a Wookie
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Sep 28, 2019 00:59
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Alright here’s a meaty one.. Scotty vs Han Solo and Scotty in a fist fight, no phasers or lasers, just raw dawg boxing (no fuckin stupid spin kicks and poo poo). I say Han goes down in one punch. 
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Sep 28, 2019 01:18
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Kashyyyk City Wok
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Sep 28, 2019 01:43
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ClamdestineBoyster posted:Alright here’s a meaty one.. Scotty vs Han Solo and Scotty in a fist fight, no phasers or lasers, just raw dawg boxing (no fuckin stupid spin kicks and poo poo). I say Han goes down in one punch. Wait a sec, how many Scottys are in this fight?
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Sep 28, 2019 02:02
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| # ? May 29, 2024 15:14 |
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What if I just don't give a flying gently caress about Ewoks? Is that acceptable OP?
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Sep 28, 2019 02:05
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