r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

Lemniscate Blue: Apr 21, 2006; Here we go again.

Modal Auxiliary posted:

Yeah, it's ludicrous how easy it can be if you're not a huge piece of poo poo with ulterior motives. I was nannying four-year-old twins when we had this exchange about their neighbors:

"How come Ed and Josh are always together?"

"Because they're married."

"Boys can marry boys?"

"Yep. You can marry almost anybody you love."

"Oh. Can I marry [brother]?"

"No, you're not allowed to marry people from your family. He'll always be your brother, though."

"Oh. Do you think there are any isopods under that rock?"

There were hella isopods under the rock

I know this wasn't the point of the post but if those kids knew and used the word "isopod" at four years old then they're starting out way ahead of the game too. Did you teach them that? 'Cause if so, awesome.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 17:00

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# ? Jun 3, 2024 22:42

CommissarMega: Nov 18, 2008; THUNDERDOME LOSER

Saint Isaias Boner posted:

I think the solution they had in mind was to have my kid taken into care and funneled through the lovely foster care system for the next decade, and/or for me to take the hint and disappear permanently one way or another

I'm with PetraCore; I know it's not much, but you have the sympathies of this internet stranger as well. Did anything happen to that counsellor? Something had better :mad:

# ? Nov 10, 2023 17:09

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Oh poo poo, I didn't even see that was a school counselor, that's horrifying. I was just skimming and thought it was a rando parent trying to stir up poo poo.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 17:15

Saint Isaias Boner: Jan 17, 2007; hi how are you ♥

No consequences, I complained but got told that he had done training with Stonewall and was obviously a great ally to LGBTQ people, etc etc. I was just glad when the council stopped investigating us based off that rear end in a top hat's "concerns", it was humiliating and took months. anyway. thanks for the nice words, I will stop hijacking this good thread now!

# ? Nov 10, 2023 17:31

Baron Zephyrus: Apr 17, 2018

CommissarMega posted:

I'm with PetraCore; I know it's not much, but you have the sympathies of this internet stranger as well.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 17:33

Hobnob: Feb 23, 2006; Ursa Adorandum

Pope Corky the IX posted:

You can be mad about that forever. Have you considered defenestration?

What did the poor trees do?

# ? Nov 10, 2023 17:47

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

Pope Corky the IX posted:

At least you acknowledge COVID happened, far too many people are back to insisting on handshakes and hugs and slapping you on the shoulder to say hello.

Now I feel even more like a poo poo when I shook a new guys hand at an onsite with our mostly WFH environment. I immediately apologized first for not asking if that was something they were comfortable with and internally feel they just went along with it for meeting their bosses' bosses' boss.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 17:52

Modal Auxiliary: Jan 14, 2005

Lemniscate Blue posted:

Did you teach them that? 'Cause if so, awesome.

drat straight. They had a dope backyard and we got way into entomology.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 18:45

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

Hobnob posted:

What did the poor trees do?

No, you're thinking of deforestation. Defenestration is when a Youtube video can't generate ad revenue because you broke the TOS.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 19:41

Kitfox88: Aug 21, 2007; Anybody lose their glasses?

No it's being thrown through widows

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:10

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

Thanks for ruining the bit, jerk.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:10

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

Batterypowered7 posted:

Thanks for ruining the bit, jerk.

I'm going to rule "thrown through widows" as an acceptable response.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:12

Pookah: Aug 21, 2008; 🪶Caw🪶

Kitfox88 posted:

No it's being thrown through widows

A bit hard on the widows

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:13

Kitfox88: Aug 21, 2007; Anybody lose their glasses?

Pookah posted:

A bit hard on the widows

Better to have loved and lost

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:14

BallerBallerDillz: Jun 11, 2009; Cock, Rules, Everything, Around, Me; Scratchmo

Pope Corky the IX posted:

I’m going to sue Fleetwood Mac over their most famous album.

Objection, hearsay!

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:14

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

From Carolyn Hax:

quote:

My fianc� and I have hit a roadblock while planning our wedding. This will be my first marriage and his second.

I have a very clear vision about what I want the wedding to be like. My fianc� is fine with allowing me to take the lead, as he has already had one wedding.

I would like a small, sophisticated, adults-only wedding. The difficulty is that my fianc� has three elementary-age children. The kids mostly live with their mom, but I get along with them fine.

I thought �adults only� meant just that, but my fianc� thought it meant �adults only except for the kids.�

We�re really at a crossroads. We�ve put deposits down on places that are not kid-friendly at all. He is adamant that the kids be there. How do we move forward from here? -- Snagged

quote:

Oh, my goodness. �Roadblock.�

I�ve spent 26 years defending couples� prerogative to have no-kid weddings, but apparently that�s only because no one has ever tried to exclude a groom�s own children against the groom�s own wishes.

If your view of what you want your marriage to be like is as fixed and rigid as your wedding vision, then please reconsider, for everyone�s sake. As Ferris warned us, life moves pretty fast.

Commenters feel Hax was not nearly brutal enough, and do their best to fill the lack.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:21

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

AITA for asking my sister to leave my engsgement party or not steal all the attention?

quote:

I (25F) just got engaged to the love of my life (Ben - 30M). We wanted to throw an engagement party and let our families get to know each other better.

My sister (Avery - 31F) who has been the favourite among all family members our whole lives, came back home the week before the engagement party. She's been travelling all over the world (SouthEast Asia, Africa, Middle East) as a physician and now opted for a change in her life.

She has always had the spotlight. Even in my high school graduation (she wasn't even there), everyone mentioned how amazing she was (because we went to the same school) and how I had filled in her footsteps. Wherever she goes, she just makes everyone else disappear.

Before the party, I told her how this party was important for both Ben and I. I also asked her to for once, let the day be about me. She agreed. During the party, everyone from my side of the family just briefly saw us and went to Avery to ask her about her adventures in Uganda or Yemen.

In just half an hour, she had the whole family around her. I called her out and said she needed to try and not take the spotlight once more. She said I was being ridiculous and it was not her fault she had a life that people wanted to know about.

I told her she could either go back inside and keep a low profile for the rest of the night or leave the party and talk about herself as much as she pleased. She called me a pathetic and jealous and left. My parents are mad at me and are saying I should have understood the situation and made a better judgement. Aita?

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:23

Vim Fuego: Jun 1, 2000; Ultra Carp

Arsenic Lupin posted:

From Carolyn Hax:

Commenters feel Hax was not nearly brutal enough, and do their best to fill the lack.

*Marries your dad without you there* "Nothing personal kid"

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:34

Runcible Cat: May 28, 2007; Ignoring this post

Vim Fuego posted:

*Marries your dad without you there* "Nothing personal kid"

"Well, at least you can be certain I'll never try and replace your mother!"

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:42

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Also what venues have they put deposits on that are "not kid-friendly at all"? Not kid-friendly usually just means they're fancy, boring, and don't serve chicken nuggies, which also describes most wedding venues. Was she looking to have an intimate family reception at the porn barn off highway 70?

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:47

Slo-Tek: Jun 8, 2001; WINDOWS 98 BEAT HIS FRIEND WITH A SHOVEL

the holy poopacy posted:

Also what venues have they put deposits on that are "not kid-friendly at all"? Not kid-friendly usually just means they're fancy, boring, and don't serve chicken nuggies, which also describes most wedding venues. Was she looking to have an intimate family reception at the porn barn off highway 70?

Feel like "A bar" is the simplest answer to that question. Doesn't have to be anything too rowdy to count as "no kids, especially ones that don't fit my aesthetic".

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:51

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

the holy poopacy posted:

Also what venues have they put deposits on that are "not kid-friendly at all"? Not kid-friendly usually just means they're fancy, boring, and don't serve chicken nuggies, which also describes most wedding venues. Was she looking to have an intimate family reception at the porn barn off highway 70?

She's like that person who wanted to get married in the wilderness where wild animal attacks were a risk

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:51

JackSplater: Nov 20, 2014; Metal Coat? It's already active?!

the holy poopacy posted:

Also what venues have they put deposits on that are "not kid-friendly at all"? Not kid-friendly usually just means they're fancy, boring, and don't serve chicken nuggies, which also describes most wedding venues. Was she looking to have an intimate family reception at the porn barn off highway 70?

Now there's a wedding worth going to.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 20:54

Foo Diddley: Oct 29, 2011; cat

Arsenic Lupin posted:

From Carolyn Hax:

Commenters feel Hax was not nearly brutal enough, and do their best to fill the lack.

oh my god, ferris bueller is an old people's reference now

brb, gonna go lie down for a bit

in a fuckin grave

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:00

Pookah: Aug 21, 2008; 🪶Caw🪶

Foo Diddley posted:

oh my god, ferris bueller is an old people's reference now

brb, gonna go lie down for a bit

in a fuckin grave

Dude, I am an old, and even for me Ferris Bueller is an old as gently caress reference

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:04

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

The movie is 37 years old, it's been an old people reference for a while

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:05

Big Bowie Bonanza: Dec 30, 2007; please tell me where i can date this cute boy

My wedding venue had a haunted lawn mower that eats kids

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:16

Cerekk: Sep 24, 2004; Oh my god, JC!

the actors who played Ferris and Cameron are literally boomers

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:17

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Ferris Bueller himself is in his sixties.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:17

Foo Diddley: Oct 29, 2011; cat

aaahhhhhhhhhhh :negative:

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:21

Clocks: Oct 2, 2007

ferris bueller is neat, because I don't remember why, but one of my teachers in high school had us watch that movie (so at least 15 years ago). what i'm saying is if you want new generations to understand old references there are ways to make it happen

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:31

Nocheez: Sep 5, 2000; Can you spare a little cheddar?; Nap Ghost

Life comes at you fast, like an oncoming car in Northern Ireland.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:34

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Nocheez posted:

Life comes at you fast, like an oncoming car in Northern Ireland.

Slo-Tek posted:

Feel like "A bar" is the simplest answer to that question. Doesn't have to be anything too rowdy to count as "no kids, especially ones that don't fit my aesthetic".

That's my point, the "not kid-friendly" thing is something she's projecting onto the venue. A bar fancy enough to be a desirable place to host a wedding reception isn't going to be noticeably any different than any other restaurant, ballroom, banquet hall, etc.

the holy poopacy fucked around with this message at 21:38 on Nov 10, 2023

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:35

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

Ferris beullers day off the meds?

AITA for drinking outside my friend's wedding?

quote:

I (M25) work with a group of guys, we are all male and in our 20s. One guy, Darren, started a little bit after us but quickly became just another one of the guys (in a good way). He's come out with us in the past to go bar hopping and things like it, but he doesn't drink.

I, on the other hand, like to drink. There's really no way to sugarcoat that, I'm the type of guy who'd probably drink at his desk if it was socially acceptable to. I'm not an alcoholic by any means, I just really enjoy a cold one. A lot of the other guys I work with all think the same way. Darren got engaged around a year ago, and he sent out RSVPs that stated in no uncertain terms that his wedding was going to be child free and alcohol free. Honestly this kind of irked me because, cmon, weddings are long events, and if you're going to have dancing and music you might as well toss drinks on the menu so people can have a good time.

I brought this up to him, and he brushed it off and said that he doesn't drink, and he doesn't want to pay for other people to get drunk. I said at least make it BYOB, that way he doesn't have to pay but also people can let loose and enjoy themselves. He said, super roughly, that he just doesn't want alcohol there and that's that. For some reason the way he said it just felt super condescending, but of course I was still going to go to his wedding since he's a friend.

Me and a couple other guys hatched a plan to make it through the wedding without breaking his rules, which essentially amounted to pregaming extra hard so that our buzz lasted throughout the event. It went great, I had a great vibe going into the party. Me and the guys got a couple looks, but nobody stopped us or said anything. After the ceremony and before the reception, my buzz started to fade so I stepped outside. Luckily I brought a case of beers just in case of this, so me and the boys took a quick break to recharge.

Darren's best man came outside, saw us sitting on the curb and drinking, and basically came to the conclusion that we were trying to ruin the wedding. He told us we weren't welcome and to leave. I justified it, we weren't bringing any inside, we hadn't broken any rules, etc. but he wasn't having it. He was talking louder and louder and I was matching his energy before one of the guys basically intervened and told me that we should just go, so we did.

This was all around three weeks ago. Darren went on his honeymoon and came back to the office but he's been icing me and the guys out the whole time. He's obviously super pissed about it. We were all talking about it and we're split around 50/50, some of them think we screwed up and we should apologize, me and some of the others think Darren is being super snooty by trying to police what we do and by giving us the cold shoulder. Help me break the tie, AITA here?

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:41

Foo Diddley: Oct 29, 2011; cat

I'm the type of guy who'd probably drink at his desk if it was socially acceptable to. I'm not an alcoholic by any means,

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:43

Kuros: Sep 13, 2010; Oh look, the consequences of my prior actions are finally catching up to me.

Cowslips Warren posted:

Ferris beullers day off the meds?

AITA for drinking outside my friend's wedding?

I'm not an alcoholic! I also can't go a few hours without having a beer!

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:43

Big Bowie Bonanza: Dec 30, 2007; please tell me where i can date this cute boy

Dry weddings suck rear end but that dude is an alcoholic

ESH

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:43

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

I'm not an alcoholic, I just resort to increasingly effortful and rude schemes to stay a little bit drunk at all times

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:45

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Big Bowie Bonanza posted:

Dry weddings suck rear end but that dude is an alcoholic

ESH

It sounds like the groom might have some history with alcoholism, either personally or a family member.

Or he might be the world's biggest square idk :shrug:

It does seem to go beyond just not being into drinking culture.

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:50

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# ? Jun 3, 2024 22:42

Vim Fuego: Jun 1, 2000; Ultra Carp

Gobbling white bread & brewers yeast before the dry wedding in an attempt to induce auto brewery syndrome

# ? Nov 10, 2023 21:51

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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