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Demiurge4
Aug 10, 2011

With the whole Jon Snow bit going on for a few pages I thought I'd weigh in with my own theory. Basically Rhaegar Targaryan was way into poetry and music and its mentioned in one of the books that one day he came down from the library and said something along the lines of "it seems I have to be a warrior". Rhaegar got his hands on some prophecy and decided that either he or his son would be the one to defeat the white walkers. He kidnapped Lyanna Stark because the saviour had to have the blood of the old men. He was remorseful about kidnapping and raping her, and Ned rescued the baby and pretended it was his own son so King Robert wouldn't murder it.

A case could be made that Jon isn't a true Targaryan because he got burned by the torch, but the same is true of Dany's poo poo brother.

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Talks To Cats
Jan 7, 2012
I hate my job and I hate you, but I'll put up with my job because it makes me a shit-ton of money. I can tell you how to do the same...but you won't listen.

I support charity:water with my erotica charity bundles. Water changes everything.

IRQ posted:

She has literally always had someone protecting her, for various reasons. She has never had any agency.

She is a boring character.
It's interesting to see different kinds of characters in different kinds of situations. The boring characters add to the whole of the story.

I've read plenty of fantasy where every character is "interesting" and it usually falls flat.

VaultAggie
Nov 18, 2010

Best out of 71?

Demiurge4 posted:

With the whole Jon Snow bit going on for a few pages I thought I'd weigh in with my own theory. Basically Rhaegar Targaryan was way into poetry and music and its mentioned in one of the books that one day he came down from the library and said something along the lines of "it seems I have to be a warrior". Rhaegar got his hands on some prophecy and decided that either he or his son would be the one to defeat the white walkers. He kidnapped Lyanna Stark because the saviour had to have the blood of the old men. He was remorseful about kidnapping and raping her, and Ned rescued the baby and pretended it was his own son so King Robert wouldn't murder it.

A case could be made that Jon isn't a true Targaryan because he got burned by the torch, but the same is true of Dany's poo poo brother.

Don't forget about Quentyn. :shepface:

whowhatwhere
Mar 15, 2010

SHINee's back

Mulatto Butts posted:

"Come, give daddy a kiss."

*Sansa kisses his cheek*

"How ... dutiful. You should be more excited to see your dad again, though."

*pulls her into his lap, kisses her on the lips*

"Try to do better next time."

Did he actually pull her onto his lap?

Mnemosyne
Jun 11, 2002

There's no safe way to put a cat in a paper bag!!

Demiurge4 posted:

He kidnapped Lyanna Stark because the saviour had to have the blood of the old men. He was remorseful about kidnapping and raping her, and Ned rescued the baby and pretended it was his own son so King Robert wouldn't murder it.

My inferences have been that he didn't actually kidnap or rape Lyanna; I got the impression she went willingly. Obviously there isn't a lot to base this off of, but one thing would be that Rhaegar named the place that he kept her "The Tower of Joy." That's not the offical name of the place, it's just what he called it. Now if we were talking about a Bolton, yeah, the "Tower of Joy" would be where you keep your kidnap/rape/torture victims, but for anyone else, it sounds more like the name you'd give to your secret love-nest. Especially when we consider that nobody other than Robert has claimed that Rhaegar was anything but a decent dude. And Robert isn't very reliable here, because he was in love with Lyanna, so he's obviously biased.

Additionally, Ned didn't find out about the murdered Targ babies until he got back to King's Landing, which was after the Tower of Joy stuff. He was hiding Jon mostly because Lyanna asked him to, which we know because we have 80 million flashbacks to Lyanna asking him to make a promise. Trusty old Ned wouldn't break his promise even if the result was that all living Targs get a free lifetime supply of lemoncakes. If he were willing to divulge the truth to anyone, he could have told his wife, who wouldn't have killed Jon, probably wouldn't have told anyone, and would have actually been nicer to Jon for it.

This doesn't disprove the first part of your theory, but I think the end part needs some reworking.

Demiurge4
Aug 10, 2011

Mnemosyne posted:

My inferences have been that he didn't actually kidnap or rape Lyanna; I got the impression she went willingly. Obviously there isn't a lot to base this off of, but one thing would be that Rhaegar named the place that he kept her "The Tower of Joy." That's not the offical name of the place, it's just what he called it. Now if we were talking about a Bolton, yeah, the "Tower of Joy" would be where you keep your kidnap/rape/torture victims, but for anyone else, it sounds more like the name you'd give to your secret love-nest. Especially when we consider that nobody other than Robert has claimed that Rhaegar was anything but a decent dude. And Robert isn't very reliable here, because he was in love with Lyanna, so he's obviously biased.

Additionally, Ned didn't find out about the murdered Targ babies until he got back to King's Landing, which was after the Tower of Joy stuff. He was hiding Jon mostly because Lyanna asked him to, which we know because we have 80 million flashbacks to Lyanna asking him to make a promise. Trusty old Ned wouldn't break his promise even if the result was that all living Targs get a free lifetime supply of lemoncakes. If he were willing to divulge the truth to anyone, he could have told his wife, who wouldn't have killed Jon, probably wouldn't have told anyone, and would have actually been nicer to Jon for it.

This doesn't disprove the first part of your theory, but I think the end part needs some reworking.

It's true we don't know the exact nature of their relationship. But considering that Robert went to war over it because she was his betrothed you'd think that if she went willingly she would have told him.

oldfan
Jul 22, 2007

"Mathewson pitched against Cincinnati yesterday. Another way of putting it is that Cincinnati lost a game of baseball."

Demiurge4 posted:

It's true we don't know the exact nature of their relationship. But considering that Robert went to war over it because she was his betrothed you'd think that if she went willingly she would have told him.

Robert's love for Lyanna does not appear to have been mutual. In specific Lyanna told Ned that Robert wouldn't stop whoring around once they were married. And the war didn't really start over Rhaegar running off with Lyanna, it started because Aerys executed Rickard and Brandon when they wet to find out about Rhaegar and Lyanna.

Demiurge4
Aug 10, 2011

jeffersonlives posted:

Robert's love for Lyanna does not appear to have been mutual. In specific Lyanna told Ned that Robert wouldn't stop whoring around once they were married. And the war didn't really start over Rhaegar running off with Lyanna, it started because Aerys executed Rickard and Brandon when they wet to find out about Rhaegar and Lyanna.

Is there a good source for this information? I don't recall reading these specifics in the books. Has Martin released other writings?

oldfan
Jul 22, 2007

"Mathewson pitched against Cincinnati yesterday. Another way of putting it is that Cincinnati lost a game of baseball."

Demiurge4 posted:

Is there a good source for this information? I don't recall reading these specifics in the books. Has Martin released other writings?

A Game of Thrones, page 379 posted:

“Robert will never keep to one bed,” Lyanna had told him at Winterfell, on the night long ago when their father had promised her hand to the young Lord of Storm’s End. “I hear he has gotten a child on some young girl in the Vale.” Ned had held the babe in his arms; he could scarcely deny her, nor would he lie to his sister, but he assured her that what Robert did before their betrothal was of no matter, that he was a good man and true who would love her with all his heart. Lyanna had only smiled. “Love is sweet, dearest Ned, but it cannot change a man’s nature.”

The Stark execution by fire stuff is all over, but I think the best telling of the story is by Jaime to Cat in A Clash of Kings.

Demiurge4
Aug 10, 2011

jeffersonlives posted:

The Stark execution by fire stuff is all over, but I think the best telling of the story is by Jaime to Cat in A Clash of Kings.

Makes sense then, it's been years since I read the first books.

whowhatwhere
Mar 15, 2010

SHINee's back
To be fair to Aerys, Brandon Stark did just roll straight into the Red Keep roaring for Rhaegar to come out and die. loving idiot.

Waffle Ho
Jul 29, 2004

What are they complaining about today? Fucking shithole of a city. Whining bastards, bitching about the trash or the crime or this or that.

whowhatwhere posted:

Did he actually pull her onto his lap?

He does at the end of AFFC when he gives her the genealogy lecture.

El Hefe
Oct 31, 2006

You coulda had a V8/
Instead of a tre-eight slug to yo' cranium/
I got six and I'm aimin' 'em/
Will I bust or keep you guessin'

whowhatwhere posted:

To be fair to Aerys, Brandon Stark did just roll straight into the Red Keep roaring for Rhaegar to come out and die. loving idiot.

I wonder how the Starks managed to hold the north for 5000 years...

whowhatwhere
Mar 15, 2010

SHINee's back

Waffle Ho posted:

He does at the end of AFFC when he gives her the genealogy lecture.

I think I'd blocked that bit out. Oh dear

Urdnot Fire
Feb 13, 2012

El Hefe posted:

I wonder how the Starks managed to hold the north for 5000 years...
Apparently because noone else really gave a gently caress about the North, and their biggest rivals are even less subtle than they are.

savinhill
Mar 28, 2010

whowhatwhere posted:

To be fair to Aerys, Brandon Stark did just roll straight into the Red Keep roaring for Rhaegar to come out and die. loving idiot.

Aerys was an even bigger idiot for having his whole evil supervillian torture/murder session of the lord and the heir of one of the great houses. If he didn't handle it that way then the rebellion might not have even happened.

whowhatwhere
Mar 15, 2010

SHINee's back
Yes, but Aerys was insane. Brandon was not.

Devorum
Jul 30, 2005

Junkenstein posted:

Holy poo poo, so like, The National recorded The Rains of Castamere.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sn2l2_v6Ur8

Haven't seen anyone else reply to this, but I thought it was pretty good and also nice to know one of my favorite bands is, apparently, a fan doing it for HBO money. Either way, I like it.

Devorum fucked around with this message at 01:23 on May 27, 2012

Chinston Wurchill
Jun 27, 2010

It's not that kind of test.

Devorum posted:

Haven't seen anyone else reply to this, but I thought it was pretty good and also nice to know one of my favorite bands is, apparently, a fan doing it for HBO money. Either way, I like it.

Between this and the song they did for Portal II, the National are building up some big nerd cred. People complained quite vehemently about their version of Rains in the TV IV thread, but I think it's rather nice. I hope they pick a slightly more upbeat artist for the Bear and the Maiden Fair, though.

Devorum
Jul 30, 2005

Chinston Wurchill posted:

Between this and the song they did for Portal II, the National are building up some big nerd cred. People complained quite vehemently about their version of Rains in the TV IV thread, but I think it's rather nice. I hope they pick a slightly more upbeat artist for the Bear and the Maiden Fair, though.

I agree, "somber dirge" is something The National can pull off. Happy, poppy folk song? Don't think so.

Urdnot Fire
Feb 13, 2012

It's not as if anyone could pull off a proper rendition of it sober, anyways.

Blade_of_tyshalle
Jul 12, 2009

If you think that, along the way, you're not going to fail... you're blind.

There's no one I've ever met, no matter how successful they are, who hasn't said they had their failures along the way.

You want upbeat and drinking song? Bear and the Maiden Fair, by Great Big Sea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-wcjBU8zbdY

whowhatwhere
Mar 15, 2010

SHINee's back

Chinston Wurchill posted:

Between this and the song they did for Portal II, the National are building up some big nerd cred. People complained quite vehemently about their version of Rains in the TV IV thread, but I think it's rather nice. I hope they pick a slightly more upbeat artist for the Bear and the Maiden Fair, though.

Eh, I wasn't a fan of it mainly because I figured an official version of the song should actually, y'know, be something that could appear in the show.

Stay Safe
Sep 1, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Blade_of_tyshalle posted:

You want upbeat and drinking song? Bear and the Maiden Fair, by Great Big Sea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-wcjBU8zbdY

Glad to see a band play the Bodhrán right.

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006

whowhatwhere posted:

Eh, I wasn't a fan of it mainly because I figured an official version of the song should actually, y'know, be something that could appear in the show.

It's a little overproduced and too clearly a multitrack recording, but with some fine-tuning it could totally work. It's a decent cover, though the singer sounds way too bored.

bigmcgaffney
Apr 19, 2009
I only listen to chillwave and stuff with greasy hood beats so I am thoroughly unimpressed

Mah boy Nitgrit need ta get on thiz poo poo immediately

Devorum
Jul 30, 2005

Blade_of_tyshalle posted:

You want upbeat and drinking song? Bear and the Maiden Fair, by Great Big Sea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-wcjBU8zbdY

They seem like a band that would be touring with Sister Hazel in 1997.

EDIT: Not necessarily a bad thing....it just seems like they may have been involved in an unfortunate time travel accident during band practice and hurled forward in time 15 years or so.

Devorum fucked around with this message at 02:47 on May 27, 2012

The Anime Liker
Aug 8, 2009

by VideoGames
If its not 80's hair metal it's not music.

mind the walrus
Sep 22, 2006

Devorum posted:

They seem like a band that would be touring with Sister Hazel in 1997.

EDIT: Not necessarily a bad thing....it just seems like they may have been involved in an unfortunate time travel accident during band practice and hurled forward in time 15 years or so.

Wait that's a loving 10s band?! They seem straight out of 1994.

Blade_of_tyshalle
Jul 12, 2009

If you think that, along the way, you're not going to fail... you're blind.

There's no one I've ever met, no matter how successful they are, who hasn't said they had their failures along the way.

They are. Great Big Sea is a Canadian institution, and the singer has had that same haircut as long as I can remember.

whowhatwhere
Mar 15, 2010

SHINee's back
Oh Canadians :allears:

Mnemosyne
Jun 11, 2002

There's no safe way to put a cat in a paper bag!!

Demiurge4 posted:

It's true we don't know the exact nature of their relationship. But considering that Robert went to war over it because she was his betrothed you'd think that if she went willingly she would have told him.

There are a couple of reasons she wouldn't have told him.

1) She's a lady of a noble house and therefore has no actual say in who she's going to marry. Her marriage has already been arranged at this point. If she told him before she left, all that would happen is that someone would stop her and probably force her to marry Robert immediately so that she couldn't run off and dishonor their family. Even if she waits until after she's left, she probably doesn't really feel like she owes him anything, since it wasn't her own decision to marry him.

2) Every description we have of Lyanna talks about how she's basically headstrong, willful, adventurous and doesn't really behave like a proper lady. She's constantly being compared to Arya, and what does Arya do? Indulges herself in adventures first and thinks about the possible consequences later (or never). On top of having that type of personality, she's 16 at the time, which is generally an age when even very dutiful girls will run off with dudes they have crushes on. And if the "Lyanna is actually the Mystery Knight/Knight of the Laughing Tree" theories are right, then Lyanna is headstrong and wild enough to actually dress up like a dude and fight in a tournament, incognito, which is pretty hardcore behavior for a girl, especially a noble.

As further support for her going willingly; Rhaegar has glorious anime hair that turns dudes gay. No way he has to resort to kidnapping chicks. Also, while looking for descriptions of Jon Connington fawning over Rhaegar, I accidentally found Barristan thinking "Prince Rhaegar loved his Lady Lyanna, and thousands died for it." Barristan is a pretty trustworthy dude.

Urdnot Fire
Feb 13, 2012

Huh, I assumed that the Knight of the Laughing Tree was just a crannogman, maybe Howland Reed specifically.

Syncopated
Oct 21, 2010
I wonder if Howland Reed warged into Lyanna when she and Rhaegar hosed?

The Unnamed One
Jan 13, 2012

"BOOM!"
Probably not, but then again the green dream of a dragon banging a wolf must've hosed him up bad.

The Unnamed One fucked around with this message at 06:19 on May 27, 2012

IRQ
Sep 9, 2001

SUCK A DICK, DUMBSHITS!

Blade_of_tyshalle posted:

They are. Great Big Sea is a Canadian institution, and the singer has had that same haircut as long as I can remember.

Pfft, only good music from Canadia is Rush, Quo Vadis, and Augury.

crazypeltast52
May 5, 2010



IRQ posted:

Pfft, only good music from Canadia is Rush, Quo Vadis, and Augury.

That's not how you spell Celine Dion!

Midnight-
Aug 22, 2007

Pain or damage don't end the world, or despair, or fuckin' beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man - and give some back.
Didn't Drogon burn the poo poo out of Dany's hands when she's out with him on 'dragonstone' in the Dothraki sea? I'm sure I remember there being passages about how struggling to climb down from there because he hands where so burnt and blistered.

Rape Jake.
Feb 23, 2012

by T. Mascis

Midnight- posted:

Didn't Drogon burn the poo poo out of Dany's hands when she's out with him on 'dragonstone' in the Dothraki sea? I'm sure I remember there being passages about how struggling to climb down from there because he hands where so burnt and blistered.

She literally takes a full blast of Dragonfire to the face and just gets bald.

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Blade_of_tyshalle
Jul 12, 2009

If you think that, along the way, you're not going to fail... you're blind.

There's no one I've ever met, no matter how successful they are, who hasn't said they had their failures along the way.

IRQ posted:

Pfft, only good music from Canadia is Rush, Quo Vadis, and Augury.

I have heard of precisely one of those bands.

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