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22 Eargesplitten posted:Like waiters. My bestie is american (I am a dirty euro) and she claims that waiters, because of getting tons of money from tips, are the only people who are better off in America than in Europe. FWIW.
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Apr 15, 2018 11:31
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Dawncloack posted:My bestie is american (I am a dirty euro) and she claims that waiters, because of getting tons of money from tips, are the only people who are better off in America than in Europe. FWIW. It varies a LOT. There's also this weird thing where an employer isn't always required to pay you minimum wage in a field where you get tips, UNLESS your tips are insufficient to reach minimum wage (with the alternative minimum wage being as low as, like, two dollars an hour as long as your tips make up the rest). There's also a strong cultural pressure in most of the US to not discuss the particular of wages because that would be inconvenient for your corporate employer who might not want everyone to know how much they're making compared to everyone else. Also important to consider is the US culture regarding service jobs, where people with lovely jobs where they're required to act subservient to customers then frequently take that out on other people with lovely jobs who are required to act subservient to customers. The US is a hosed-up broken country.
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Apr 15, 2018 12:11
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Shady Amish Terror posted:It varies a LOT. There's also this weird thing where an employer isn't always required to pay you minimum wage in a field where you get tips, UNLESS your tips are insufficient to reach minimum wage (with the alternative minimum wage being as low as, like, two dollars an hour as long as your tips make up the rest). There's also a strong cultural pressure in most of the US to not discuss the particular of wages because that would be inconvenient for your corporate employer who might not want everyone to know how much they're making compared to everyone else. Also important to consider is the US culture regarding service jobs, where people with lovely jobs where they're required to act subservient to customers then frequently take that out on other people with lovely jobs who are required to act subservient to customers. If your job is unionized or government then people can generally figure out your pay-by-grade level or years-in-service. But for other stuff, yep - meritocracy all the way. So you don't discuss compensation because depending on your skill gender or tenure race you may be making more or less than the next guy or gal. Some kind of offshoot from our Puritan work ethic. I'm starting to understand why Europe didn't want them. It's kind of like buying airline tickets. If you discuss what you paid for the exact same seats then someone is always going to come away feeling really lovely. Krispy Wafer fucked around with this message at 15:54 on Apr 15, 2018 |
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Apr 15, 2018 12:26
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If you're a govt employee in the US, generally your wages are public record. I know for the feds there is an online database where you can look up people's base wages. I've also seen it for some states as well. Knowing exactly what your co-worker, supervisor, and secretary make does add an interesting dynamic. Some people are either drastically under or overpaid.
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Apr 15, 2018 15:52
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Dawncloack posted:My bestie is american (I am a dirty euro) and she claims that waiters, because of getting tons of money from tips, are the only people who are better off in America than in Europe. FWIW. You can make decent money in states (like CA) that say tipped employees have to be paid state minimum wage before tips.
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Apr 15, 2018 21:17
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quote:Boyfriend buying a house, wants me to live and pay half of mortgage while not building any equity in case of marriage
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Apr 15, 2018 21:24
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If she doesn't sign a lease agreement, many states will consider her a percent owner if she makes any permanent improvements such as a new shelf in the closet. The boyfriend sounds like a goony What's Mine is Mine!!! type that also wants her to cut the cost of the place for him?
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Apr 15, 2018 21:46
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He is right, the amount of her money that will go to principal is pretty trivial in the first couple years and it isn't fair for her to freeload off his down payment money. Further, the value of the house could easily decrease, especially after considering transaction costs. She is almost certainly getting a better deal than renting at market rate without any of the capital risk or maintenance/insurance liability. In principle, having an agreement that declares the house a fully marital asset in the event they get married is a sound arrangement that reduces perverse incentives around the decision to get married IMO.
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Apr 16, 2018 00:17
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If he wants to combine households, they should do so (and probably get married). If he wants to have separate household finances, he doesn’t get to use her money for closing costs or expect her to pay towards maintenance or emergency repairs.
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Apr 16, 2018 00:38
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GoGoGadgetChris posted:If she doesn't sign a lease agreement, many states will consider her a percent owner if she makes any permanent improvements such as a new shelf in the closet. Yeah, the trying to have things both ways is pretty crappy but I respect that he wants to keep the $120K in equity his. Maybe the 10-15 years is something worked out in his head because eventually they'd sell that house and it's an uncomfortable math problem to work out as to what's exactly his and what's hers in that case?
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Apr 16, 2018 01:26
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BEHOLD: MY CAPE posted:He is right, the amount of her money that will go to principal is pretty trivial in the first couple years I think you're right that she's probably better off than renting, but that post is a rollercoaster. She wants everything in writing ahead of time which is great, but his 5-10 year thing is a red flag, plus the possibility that she'll put in $10k for nothing.... I feel like this thing has "bad breakup" all over it.
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Apr 16, 2018 01:32
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Ulf posted:Sure, but she is paying for his mortgage interest deduction. Most people won't get a mortgage tax deduction anymore and the value for those that do would be substantially decreased, would depend on the specifics but the tax concerns in this situation would generally be modest or nonexistent. IMO overall "I put down all/almost all the money and take all of the short term capital risk, you split payments and expenses with me, if we get married it is agreed the house is a wholly marital asset, if not you can walk away without any hassle" is a pretty reasonable agreement when you stop looking at a house as a gold mine and start looking at it as an illiquid liability that replaces your rent expense
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Apr 16, 2018 02:05
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BEHOLD: MY CAPE posted:Most people won't get a mortgage tax deduction anymore and the value for those that do would be substantially decreased, would depend on the specifics but the tax concerns in this situation would generally be modest or nonexistent. Dating: lease agreement, no downpayment, no maintenance expenses, security deposit. Married: marital asset w/ lots of random expenses. E: It's good to see the top-voted comment on Reddit says to do this....and then the gf comes in....Yeah the bf is a goonygoon.  quote:I totally agree with your sentiment that if we get married and combine finances, I shouldn’t have to worry about my share vs his, but he is worried about it. He doesn’t think that if we get married in 2 years, I should have an equal share of the home since he put in so much more. He wants me to continue paying for the mortgage, but if we divorce I won’t be entitled to the home. He says he will put me on the deed after I’ve paid enough to balance out his initial $120k investment. SiGmA_X fucked around with this message at 02:15 on Apr 16, 2018 |
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Apr 16, 2018 02:11
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SiGmA_X posted:This sums up what I just typed up. Yeah, gently caress that guy. If she marries him he’s going to be the kind of guy that insists they split expenses 50/50 while making significantly more and then wondering why his wife is so depressed about having no disposable income while he gets to buy all the fun toys he wants. I bet he’ll have shelves in the fridge labeled for just his groceries too...
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Apr 16, 2018 02:39
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SquirrelFace posted:Yeah, gently caress that guy. If she marries him he’s going to be the kind of guy that insists they split expenses 50/50 while making significantly more and then wondering why his wife is so depressed about having no disposable income while he gets to buy all the fun toys he wants. They aren't married and he is putting up a huge chunk for the down payment. Should he shoulder all of the risk AND all of the expense? And then give her equity? I think he should pay the full down and charge her rent up until they get married. No equity. therobit fucked around with this message at 03:11 on Apr 16, 2018 |
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Apr 16, 2018 02:59
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Sorry, quote is not edit.
therobit fucked around with this message at 03:10 on Apr 16, 2018 |
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Apr 16, 2018 03:00
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Buying a house together when you’re not married is just BWM all around. There’s no good way to do it.
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Apr 16, 2018 03:11
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therobit posted:They aren't married and he is pursuing up a huge chunk for the down payment. should he shoulder all of the risk AND all of the expense? That is the nature of marital property, yes. If he doesn't like it, get her to sign a pre-nup.
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Apr 16, 2018 03:11
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Liquid Communism posted:That is the nature of marital property, yes. That is literally what he is talking about doing. They arent married currently. If he buys a house now, it is a pre-marital asset, but marital funds going towards it will slowly convert it to one eventually anyway. Why would he give her equity now?
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Apr 16, 2018 03:13
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The wording is what kills me about this one. Also drat girl, eat out less. Is it mathematically and realistically possible to save $10k if we make $80k annually? quote:My husband would like us to have $10k of savings and keep it there. My view is we don’t make enough in order for that to happen. After all our bills, we have about $400 left over each month. We put away $100 each week into savings, which is included in the bills. Currently we have about $5k in our savings, which is more than I’ve ever saved on my own! Maybe we need to use a money market instead of our federal credit union’s savings account in order to get closer to $10k? quote:Yes, definitely. We have saved more then that on less income. It's about your expenses though. If you have super high housing and childcare expenses it's going to be harder. OP posted:Most of it is in food, I’m sure, as in going out to eat whenever we want. We are child-free, and our mortgage is reasonable. It’s helpful to hear that it is possible! Keep in mind she's not even asking about saving $10k per year. Just in having $10k saved up.
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Apr 16, 2018 03:54
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Hoodwinker posted:The wording is what kills me about this one. Also drat girl, eat out less. “Eat out less” Her: 
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Apr 16, 2018 04:03
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I don’t get it. If they have $5k saved now and put away $100/week already (as part of bills for some reason) in one year they will have $10k. Is that the joke?
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Apr 16, 2018 04:08
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Sobriquet posted:I don’t get it. If they have $5k saved now and put away $100/week already (as part of bills for some reason) in one year they will have $10k.
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Apr 16, 2018 04:19
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Liquid Communism posted:That is the nature of marital property, yes. That's precisely what he's proposing to do in regards to the house
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Apr 16, 2018 04:24
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Big ticket purchases when you're very very seriously dating, but not married or imminently married, are uncomfortable. If they're so seriously dating that he can't just buy a house for himself without it involving the girlfriend, he should delay it or speed up the getting married so that the huge life altering decision (buying a house) is made with this person.
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Apr 16, 2018 04:41
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therobit posted:That is literally what he is talking about doing. They arent married currently. If he buys a house now, it is a pre-marital asset, but marital funds going towards it will slowly convert it to one eventually anyway. Why would he give her equity now? Why would a renter put a penny up for the downpayment? And why would a renter get equity? At marriage things would change, and then the discussion would pivot to a prenup. What is happening today with the purchase has nothing to do with future equity as far as I can tell, but it throws up red flags about the guy. Sobriquet posted:I don’t get it. If they have $5k saved now and put away $100/week already (as part of bills for some reason) in one year they will have $10k. GoGoGadgetChris posted:Big ticket purchases when you're very very seriously dating, but not married or imminently married, are uncomfortable.
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Apr 16, 2018 05:41
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SiGmA_X posted:Maybe we're all being bad with words. Yeah, she should not put up any money for the down unless they get married first. The way I read out, She was talking about putting up 1/12 as much money as him for the down, and then wanting all her payments to count towards equity, which makes no sense at all. I think he should just buy the house, charge her rent, and they should get a prenuptial agreement to cover what happens with it if they get married. I would never get one myself, but I'm a traditionalist when it comes to that stuff.
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Apr 16, 2018 06:05
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therobit posted:They aren't married and he is putting up a huge chunk for the down payment. Should he shoulder all of the risk AND all of the expense? And then give her equity? I think the whole convoluted plan is dumb and agree that rent without her contributing to major maintenance or down payment is the only way to go if he wants her to live there. But her description of his whole plan also makes him sound like a dick.
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Apr 16, 2018 10:40
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Enchanted Hat posted:Look, the poor man is only making at $500,000+ a year. If they charge him 37% on all of that, that leaves him with only $315,000 a year to cover his expenses. Have you ever tried to live on only $315,000 a year? Next door to impossible! This reminds me of an article after the 2008 financial crisis where someone working on Wall Street with a $300,000+ salary was saying that people don't understand how bad he has it trying to put multiple children through private school and pay his $10,000 a year country club membership. I want to say he also had a five figure expense for a full time dog walker but I might be mixing up crying rich people articles.
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Apr 16, 2018 11:09
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therobit posted:That is literally what he is talking about doing. They arent married currently. If he buys a house now, it is a pre-marital asset, but marital funds going towards it will slowly convert it to one eventually anyway. Why would he give her equity now? Depends on how much he wants to set his clock by the divorce for treating the relationship as a business venture. poo poo'll be hilarious when they break up (over money stressors) but she claims tenancy rights to prevent eviction.
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Apr 16, 2018 13:30
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Liquid Communism posted:Depends on how much he wants to set his clock by the divorce for treating the relationship as a business venture. All he would have to do would be give her the required notice by state law and then file an unlawful detainer suit. Probably only a fool would refuse to move out in that situation seeing as how difficult evictions generally make it for you to rent in the future.
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Apr 16, 2018 13:49
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VictorianQueerLit posted:This reminds me of an article after the 2008 financial crisis where someone working on Wall Street with a $300,000+ salary was saying that people don't understand how bad he has it trying to put multiple children through private school and pay his $10,000 a year country club membership. She was also saving $50,000 a year for retirement, and I think had a nanny.
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Apr 16, 2018 13:55
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Harry posted:She was also saving $50,000 a year for retirement, and I think had a nanny.
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Apr 16, 2018 14:16
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Harry posted:She was also saving $50,000 a year for retirement, and I think had a nanny. Yeah there are several of these hypothetical or exaggerated "I have nothing but literally everything" type financial breakdowns for $100,001+ earners floating around
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Apr 16, 2018 14:17
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I think we're all remembering this: Someone who is good with the economy please help me budget. My family is dying.
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Apr 16, 2018 14:38
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I love the $10,000 for miscellaneous. "Something always comes up!" And I'm out 10 grand.
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Apr 16, 2018 14:40
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Lol that after all that stuff they've still got six hundred bucks a month left that they could literally set fire to and not notice. Ten grand a year on clothes! Life is so hard.
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Apr 16, 2018 14:53
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I'm.. honestly I don't know what's worst. I'm so average in my 1.5 million dollar home! I'm so average with my 3 vacations a year, totalling $18,000! I'm so average with my $18,000 to charity every year! Also that "-40% for taxes" seems... inaccurate.
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Apr 16, 2018 14:54
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hailthefish posted:Also that "-40% for taxes" seems... inaccurate. In NYC the effective tax rate on $500,000 is 43% in 2017. Trump tax plan will save them $20K in taxes though, whew.
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Apr 16, 2018 14:58
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I'm so glad it's a joke post, though even knowing it is my brain is screaming.
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Apr 16, 2018 14:59
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