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  • Locked thread
AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007

SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?
Yam Slacker
A. A manager generally doesn't get to choose by whom they are owned.

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Sky Shadowing
Feb 13, 2012

At least we're not the Thalmor (yet)
Have you never read about AFC Parmo? Do you not know what giving mass amounts of goons control of a club does?!?!

Surprisingly, the answer is they do very well, so the only acceptable vote is B.

(AFC Parmo was a Yohan Kebab (then Ray Parlour) tradition of a goon leading a team for 6 months at a time. Long story short, from Skrill South to Champions League Finalists in under a year real-time.)

grill youre saelf
Jan 22, 2006

C. I am enjoying the read and would like the OP to continue to have fun while running through this.

Smoky Bandana
Oct 1, 2009

You can trip on my synthesizer.
I'm too lazy to participate so I like C as long as you're not fired right out the gate.

Nissin Cup Nudist
Sep 3, 2011

Sleep with one eye open

We're off to Gritty Gritty land




B

It has long been theorized if goons can a run a team better than most current GM's. Time to put it to the test :getin:

Inadequately
Oct 9, 2012
B, because this works so well in real life.

(I have no idea how it works in real life.)

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
The B's resoundingly have it. Fan trust it is.

Unfortunately the FMRTE ingame editor no longer has the "Make the owner sell the team" button, which means I'll have to work to get the owner to sell the club. I've set his age at over 100, turned all of his stats down to 1 except for patience (so he doesn't fire me if we lose a couple games) and fixed our finances up. Or FMRTE might get updated with that at any time, in which case it'll be pretty easy to force a sale. New update should be either this afternoon or this evening, depending on how lazy I am at work.

twig1919
Nov 1, 2011
I am an inconsiderate moron whose only method of discourse is idiotic personal attacks.
Is it possible to edit the save file to simulate the sale?

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.

twig1919 posted:

Is it possible to edit the save file to simulate the sale?

The FM save files aren't plaintext, so I can't just go in myself and ctrl+f my way to Tackleford and then directly edit ownership. I have FMRTE, which is a savegame editor, but at the moment there's no way to directly change ownership. So it'll take a bit longer to get a true Goonocracy as I have to edit the owner into a situation where his advanced age and lowered stats make him likely to sell the team. Or, as I said, if FMRTE re-enables that feature from it's FM13 editor I can do it more quickly.

habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 18:25 on Dec 5, 2013

Zeroisanumber
Oct 23, 2010

Nap Ghost

habeasdorkus posted:

Unlike some other games, the FM save files aren't plaintext, so I can't just go in myself and ctrl+f my way to Tackleford and then directly edit ownership. I have FMRTE, which is a savegame editor, but at the moment there's no way to directly change ownership. So it'll take a bit longer to get a true Goonocracy as I have to edit the owner into a situation where his advanced age and lowered stats make him likely to sell the team. Or, as I said, if FMRTE re-enables that feature from it's FM13 editor I can do it more quickly.

I knew we shoulda stuck with the Russian...

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
Volume Two: Purgitorio

Chapter the First: The close season.
May 12, 2014-July 1, 2014



Just a day after the start of the offseason owner Yuri Kropotkin was found dead in scandalous circumstances. Tackleford FC is likely to be put up on the auction block as the oligarch's assets are distributed to his heirs and assigns. Local fans are quick to start fundraising for when the team is put up for purchase, but at present the team is being run by a caretaker regime that has stated it will not invest additional money into the club.



The board has also ordered that the team's finances become self-sufficient, and that the manager reduce the wage budget now that the club is no longer being funded from the oligarch's own pockets.




The club lost £4 million despite taking in nearly 6 million pounds. In order to comply with the caretaker board's demands we're going to have to slash salary by a fair amount and be much more circumspect in our signings. We'll also have to slow down our rate of training facility improvements, as those are large lump sum costs.



I didn't realize this but our Under-18 squad won their group. This has basically no benefit, and only shows that our youth players are better than the other lowest division youth players. Still, it's better to win than lose.



Rosetti and Duchamps both have contracts that end in a year. They're both unwilling to resign with the team, and Rosetti straight up doesn't respect me. I could sign them, probably, but they'd each take significant pay raises and we simply can't afford that. Moreover, they could be signed away by foreign teams on pre-contracts as of January, meaning we can't wait until mid-season to move them.



My decision is made easier since Rosetti went from being excellent at the start of last year to merely middling throughout the second half of the season. He scored only five goals in his final 17 games, and found net just once after mid-February when we most needed him. His departure will hurt, he's still by far and away our best player, but he wasn't as vital to the team as you'd imagine.



So Rosetti goes on the transfer list and he'll probably bring in over a million pounds. I'm going to wait and see on Duchamps for now, he won't bring in as much money and his £2,500/wk salary isn't nearly as prohibitive as Rosetti's £17,000/wk. If we get a good offer for him he's gone, otherwise I might play through the season with him even though we'd get nothing for him at the end of the year.



Between Rosetti and players with expiring contracts we'll trim our wage bill by about £30,000/wk. Combined with lower transfer expenditures and what the sale of Rosetti will bring in and we should be just about at the break even point. The core of our team will return, the only players leaving who got any playing time down the stretch were McLaughlin, Rosetti, and Casey.



I also set up a boatload of friendlies against the biggest competition I can find, now that we're poor I need to buck up our bankroll however I can, and one good way to do that is to be the whipping boys for higher division teams. We're expected to make over £100,000 in profit from our match against Arsenal alone. Overall we should bring in over a half million pound profit from preseason matches. It also means we're going to get our asses kicked repeatedly, since we're playing against much better clubs.



On June 5th the transfer window opens again, and we're able to start officially adding players. We've got a couple areas I'd like to improve on, but we need to sort out our wage situation first.



Wigan is interested in Duchamps. He'll get moved if they make a suitable offer as we have no hope of getting him to sign a contract that won't destroy our wage structure.



Each summer teams cut loose youth players that they don't wish to sign to professional contracts. Most of the time they're slim pickings, but occasionally as a LLM you can find someone who has a lot of talent and has developed enough to be useful for your team.

Ian Ellis, Goalkeeper
Free Transfer





Our first signing of the offseason is Ian Ellis, who was released from League One side Coventry. He's currently rated as a “leading Skrill Premier” goalkeeper and he, along with Marc Pearsons, should be with us for several years. He's the replacement for McLaughlin, and will have first crack at being our starting goalkeeper.





We're also in the market for a new striker to replace Rosetti, a right winger to supplement the aging McCarron and allow Holsgrove to play on the left wing, and perhaps also a left back if we find one on the cheap. I'll also be looking for any bargains regardless of position, but right now we've got a mostly complete team. Our success in the coming season will largely be determined by how much our young players improve, enough growth and we'll be looking at back to back promotions.



While all the world is paying attention to the drama of transfer season in Tackleford, England, some little quadrennial international competition is happening in Brazil.



Five teams are interested in Duchamps, and we accept an offer from Wigan Athletic that would pay us £437,500 pounds and also allow us to keep Duchamps for this coming season on loan. This is the best of both worlds for us as Duchamps would not sign a new contract with us forcing us to sell him or lose him for nothing at the end of the season. The Wigan offer allows us to both keep him for the season and get paid, and on top of that allows us to arrange a friendly against them where we'll get to keep all of the proceeds. And there's more, now we don't have to pay Duchamps' wages for the season. The end result is that we save £130,000 on Duchamps salary, get paid £437,500 by Wigan, and earn another £95,000 from our friendly with them... all while keeping Duchamps for the same amount of time that we would have had we not sold him. I love this game sometimes.



Wigan and Duchamps quickly agree upon a contract, and we've sold our first player. I was honestly expecting Rosetti to be sold more quickly, but while Serie A team Chievo is nosing around him they have yet to make an offer.



A well deserved award. Holsgrove was excellent all season, and I'm hoping he can continue to outperform his two star rating for another year in a higher division. You'll find that some players seem to outperform their star rating, so long as they look to you like they deserve those high ratings then I support sticking with them. The opposite is true, you can find some absolutely brilliant players who constantly underperform, and you should be willing to accept that some 4.5 star player just isn't actually as good as the guy you already had with 2.5 stars.



I mean, I guess it's better than a punch in the face, but this isn't exactly worth notifying me about. Tell me when we start pulling in the real TV money.



Welcome back. It's like you never left.



Wow. And here I thought we'd be asked to finish somewhere in the mid-table. I really hope we challenge for promotion, because I could find myself on the hot seat if we don't. I'm also not sure how we could have such a large transfer budget, given that I've already edited us down to a much more reasonable amount in the kitty of £500,000 and unchecked the sugar daddy box. I change these to a £35k/wk wage budget and £50k base transfer budget, as the other numbers are just way too much for a team at our level. By way of comparison, Luton Town has the highest wage budget in the Skrill Premier league, and that is only £33,000/week. Our budget numbers will improve with the Duchamps and Rosetti sales, 70% of each sale will be available for wages and transfers so we're looking at ~1.2m more than the base amount.



15 players see their salaries increase, this occurs when they have a clause in their contract that gives them a yearly pay-raise. For some of these players it doesn't mean much, an additional 20% of 200/wk is only 40 quid. For the ones earning a decent wage, though, it can amount to a big bump. Players can get both a promotion salary increase and their yearly increase, so be careful that the guy who was affordable at one level isn't getting too large of a pay hike when you win promotion.

Michael Coulson, Winger
On Loan from MK Dons





We loan Coulson from our parent club, MK Dons, and while he's best in an Attacking mid-right position he'll also be able to provide cover at Striker and mid-right. Since he's a loaner his salary is paid by the parent team and we get someone who should be pretty good for us for free. Of course, since he's a loaner we don't get to keep him permanently. Loan players are very useful to a Lower League Manager, you can get some very good players for your level at zero cost, but if you rely on too many of them you can find yourself without a good home-grown core when you reach the higher levels.





The World Cup is rife with upsets as Germany, Italy, France, Holland, and Uruguay are all bounced in the group stage. The United States beats Uruguay, but yet another loss to Ghana (for the third time in the last three World Cups, and just as I predicted when they were drawn together in Chapter Eight last season) keeps them from advancing to the knockout round. Meanwhile the English look dominant, scoring 12 goals in three wins to move on. Odds on favorites are Brazil, who play Chile in the knockout round.



Rosetti looks to return to Italy, with Serie A sides Chievo and Torino both looking to sign him for a 1.3m transfer fee. Between the Rosetti and Duchamps sales we should have more than enough money to play with during the season. He'll leave the team on July 6th, so our friendly with Bolton will be his last game for the team.



Or not. I guess it's the end of an era here at the Fig Poll Stadium.




Where's your faith, guys? We've totally got this. I hope.

habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 20:49 on Dec 5, 2013

TheMcD
May 4, 2013

Monaca / Subject N 2024
---------
Despair will never let you down.
Malice will never disappoint you.

Ivory Coast and Japan in over Germany. Tunisia over France. Costa Rica over Italy. What.

At this rate, I'd have called Switzerland to win the whole thing if they didn't drop too. As it stands, the winner's got to be Ghana. No particular relation to them beyond the fact that during the 2006 WC in Germany, their team stayed in Würzburg, Bavaria (which is the closest to where I live) and they essentially turned into the #2 team everybody around here cheered for, but I guess that counts.

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
If England doesn't go out on penalties in the quarterfinals I'm returning this game as busted.

beru04
May 4, 2013

Stop making me realise things.

habeasdorkus posted:

If England doesn't go out on penalties in the quarterfinals I'm returning this game as busted.

Every time. :(

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
I am perplexed. I didn't know that this was even possible:

Smoky Bandana
Oct 1, 2009

You can trip on my synthesizer.
:siren: ING-GER-LUND! ING-GER-LUND! ING-GER-LUND! :siren:


(Pretty sure this is the closest we'll get in my lifetime.)

rizzen
Apr 25, 2011

Uhhhh.. what?

How does that even happen?

I guess the alternate universe players are just better?

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
Also lucky. England's only really tough ask in the knockout rounds was Spain in the Quarterfinals, their other opponents were Cote d'Ivoire (semis) and Russia (knockout round). That plus a fairly easy group stage = World Cup champions.

Smoky Bandana
Oct 1, 2009

You can trip on my synthesizer.
Out of interest, did Belgium somehow manage to topple Brazil?

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
Argentina beat Brazil 3-2 in a hell of a match in the quarterfinals via a hat trick from this world's Kun Aguero. Belgium beat Argentina in a penalty kick shootout in the semis.

Smoky Bandana
Oct 1, 2009

You can trip on my synthesizer.
Man, poor guys can't catch a break on home turf. Hell, what am I saying? They're still the most successful team ever.

Other than Ingerlund of course.

TheFlyingLlama
Jan 2, 2013

You really think someone would do that? Just go on the internet and be a llama?



To be fair, the World Cup is just really wonky, even with real players. Last time I played, Theo Robinson of Jamaica was the Golden boot winner, and Jamaica only went out in the Semis to Spain.

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
So I'm guessing mostly American and English people are following this. World Cup 2014 draw talk:

How boned did our respective countries get this morning? I'm not sure which group is worse, fighting for two spots against Uruguay and Italy, or fighting for one spot against Ghana and Portugal. Group B is also hellacious, the Dutch still have Robben and Van Persie, Spain is Spain, and the Chileans are really friggin' good.

And loving France! They have to come back from down two in a playoff to just make the World Cup and are gifted a peach of a group! And Mexico gets saved by a stoppage time goal by the US to just make the World Cup and has a group they're favored to move on from against Croatia and Cameroon!

If you're Dutch, Chilean, Portuguese, Uruguayan, Italian, or Ghanaian, feel free to join the sulkfest. If you're French and even consider whining about the draw go choke on a baguette.

TheMcD
May 4, 2013

Monaca / Subject N 2024
---------
Despair will never let you down.
Malice will never disappoint you.

As a German, I can wholeheartedly say... meh. Could have gone better for us, could have gone worse for us. USA, Portugal and Ghana are all pretty tough teams that could gently caress with our poo poo if we slip up (and we've had a tendency recently to slip up). At least the Swiss got a decent group.

Also, as a German born to a German mother and an American father, I look forward to the hilarity.

EDIT: Also, Klinsmann knows us, and knows Löw in particular. This could come back to bite us.

Amhazair
Feb 13, 2012

habeasdorkus posted:

I am perplexed. I didn't know that this was even possible:


In the versions I've played (Which should be... from around 2000 when it still was Championship manager till maybe 2008?) England and English players were generally overrated and would consistently do well in major tournaments.

As for the real draw, I'm quite happy with the draw Belgium's gotten. If we can't qualify from that group, we won't have any right to complain about anything else.

Average Lettuce
Oct 22, 2012


As a Portuguese, I guess it could be worse. Germany is always tough, Ghana might be dangerous, not expecting to much from the USA.

Arquebus
Feb 19, 2013
As an Australian, it was already going to be unlikely we'd see a draw that didn't leave us doomed from the start... though I'd probably trade a finger to see us beat Spain, or at least to seriously injure Fernando Torres.

JT Jag
Aug 30, 2009

#1 Jaguars Sunk Cost Fallacy-Haver
France and Argentina get groups they'll just stroll through and the US gets the group of death. Fantastic.

Arquebus posted:

As an Australian, it was already going to be unlikely we'd see a draw that didn't leave us doomed from the start... though I'd probably trade a finger to see us beat Spain, or at least to seriously injure Fernando Torres.
You're really overvaluing an injury to Fernando Torres here.

Arquebus
Feb 19, 2013
What can I say, I'm spiteful.

JT Jag
Aug 30, 2009

#1 Jaguars Sunk Cost Fallacy-Haver
I mean all I'm saying is that an injury to Torres, especially during international duty, is worth no more than maybe a sprained ankle on your part. He does it so often that he's devalued it.

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.
Chapter the Second: We are the Washington Generals
July 1, 2014-August 8, 2014

Time to make some money. If we can win any of our friendlies, I'll be pleased as punch. More likely we're going to get crushed on our way to a payday.



We've got 9 games over the next 5 weeks, which will probably wreck our pitch, but should mean we're aces at our tactics and playing as a cohesive unit when we start the season. We've also scheduled the Wigan friendly for later in August, which should be a nice boost to our balance sheet.



Things have stopped being exciting for underdogs at the World Cup, as the remaining Great Powers win every match in the second round. So much for a Costa Rica World Cup title. At least I can still dream on an African victor.



I've added a third tactic to our arsenal. It's a 4-5-1, designed to take advantage of our current roster as we have a surfeit of defensive midfielders and our wide players handle the attacking midfielder role better than the wide midfielder one.



Farewell, il giocatore. May you find success with the bulls of Torino. The fans don't seem to miss him that much, which surprises me.



Back to focusing on fitness and tactics.

vs Bolton, July 2, 2014
Friendly


I don't care about the result, and to prove it I play a largely youth side in the first half. We have a couple shots on goal, but go down 2-0 by the half and never recover. We swap out the entire squad at halftime, so that players can get their minutes in. The team is disappointed after the game, but realize that this game was all about fitness and not results.

Tackleford City 0-3 Bolton Wanderers



Our pitch condition is perfect. That won't last long.

Boris Ponce, Winger
Free Transfer




Boris Ponce was released by Tottenham Hotspur, and we pounced on him. He's going to play a lot on each wing as part of a rotation with Terry, Holsgrove, McCarron, and Coulson. I'm quite pleased to have grabbed him, he's already one of our better players and should be able to improve significantly. I'll need to be careful, though, as he's only on a one year deal. If he's playing well at midseason I'll need to make sure I offer him a new contract.



The biggest shock here is Brazil going down to their archrival Argentina in a crazy game that saw a hat trick from this world's Sergio Aguero, and Spain falling to England. Wait, Spain fell to England?



This game is obviously broken. I'm not playing again until it's patched.



As time goes on agents will start telling you about their clients who are either out of contract or looking for a transfer from their current team. I never found these that useful, but it doesn't hurt to scout the player and see if they're worth making a bid for.



This is from a potential defensive signing, who I'm passing on because having a defender with an unsporting personality means they're going to give up oodles of penalties and drive me crazy.



Look at that, we almost know what we're doing!



Mansfield comes asking around Sam Edwards. I'm torn here, Edwards was very good last season but he's in his decline phase and he does earn £1k/wk. On the other hand, they're only offering us £5,500 for him. I try to see if Mansfield would give us £10,000 for him, and they refuse.

vs. Bradford, July 9 2014
Friendly


I would have been very happy with this friendly had Bradford not seen fit to mutilate three of my strikers over the course of the game. Two of them will be out for the next fortnight because of injuries sustained in this game. We hold Bradford scoreless, and get a couple of good looks on the counter attack, and over the course of 90 minutes we play a League One team dead even.

Tackleford City 0-0 Bradford

Stuart Hunter, Right Back
Free Transfer




Hunter joins us as another free transfer from Tottenham Hotspur, and as he's only 17 years old is primarily a signing for the future. He'll get some minutes over the course of the year, though, and he might turn out to be quite good in time.



England vs. Belgium for all the marbles in three days time. I know that Belgium is a hot pick for sleeper team of next years world cup, but England? C'mon. Stop breaking my immersion, game.

Ben Knott, Left Back
Free Transfer




Knott joins us from Liverpool to play in rotation with Allison. Whichever of the two end up being better will be our medium term solution at left back. He's affordable, earning £650/wk over his 2 year contract.



Hey, all of England is going to watch us get slaughtered by one of the best teams in the world. We've made the big-time, lads!

Simon Hatton, Striker
Free Transfer




Meet Cyrus Rosetti's replacement. Yes, he's nowhere near as good as Rosetti, but he also costs just 1/40th as much. There's a good chance he'll improve as a player rather than stagnate like Rosetti did last year, between Hatton and Oriogun we should be fine in our advance forward spot whether we're playing a 4-4-2 or a 4-5-1. And with that, my primary shopping is done. We've roughly halved our wage budget from last season, and while we'll outspend our opponents it won't be by nearly as much as last season. Of course, a week after we sign him Hatton goes down with a pulled hamstring, so he'll be on the shelf for about a month.




All England needed to do to win a World Cup was to have me start a Let's Play, apparently. This is the first time in literally a dozen Football Manager World Cups that I have seen England win. Amazing. Truly anything is possible.

Martin Grainger, Centerback
Free Transfer




Grainger is exceedingly raw, and he's only 5'4”, which makes him miniscule for a centerback, but he has the potential to be a Premier League player. He's going to get some playing time this year. If he develops we have a great talent locked down until 2019 and if he's a bust we're only spending £150/wk on him. I do love the idea of a 5'4” player with a 16 heading skill. It's a pity he won't ever be able to reach the ball.

vs. Derby, July 15, 2014
Friendly


We play well against a Championship club, and on a different night the score line might have been reversed. If we keep this up we'll be in good shape to start the season. I'm going to cancel a couple of our remaining friendlies, we're in OK money shape and I don't want the squad to get down about losing to higher division squads when they should really be pleased at how they're competing against those teams.

Tackleford City 1-2 Derby



Another reason to reduce the number of friendlies, our pitch has already gone from Perfect to Very Good in the course of three games and will be in horrible shape by the time the season begins.



At the start of each season you get to determine the bonus pool. This is the amount that will be shared amongst the players based upon their performance in the league and cup competitions. If you set it low you save money, but some players will be less motivated by the lack of financial incentive. If you set it high some players will be more motivated but you have to spend more if you do well. We've got a current balance of £3.4m and we can afford £350k in bonus payments, especially since to pay out the full amount we'd need to win the league, win the non-league trophy, and do very well in the FA cup.



We're listed as having the second best odds to win the league, but Wycombe are correctly favorites. Wycombe was a League One team just 3 years ago, and they still have a lot of talent for a team at this level. Many of their players are unhappy due to the relegations, however, which could lead them to perform poorly despite having better talent than every other team. You can deal with one or two unhappy players on a squad, but when half of your starting lineup is sulking you might be on a sinking ship.

vs. Arsenal, July 18, 2014
Friendly


Arsenal finished 3rd in the Premier League last season, and made it to the quarterfinals of the Champion's League. They're one of the top dozen clubs in the world. And they're in our house for a pre-season tune-up. We'll play our best lineup but if we only lose by three I'll be amazed. We have our largest crowd ever, we should have home field advantage, and none of it matters. That record crowd watches us get obliterated. We're down 6-0 after 45 minutes, and it could easily be worse. I'm starting to think the income from this match isn't worth the morale hit. Things only continue to get worse in the second half, and the only good thing I have to say is that we at least got a few decent chances of our own.

Tackleford City 0-10 Arsenal



At least the team reacts well when I tell them that the match was all about preparation and the score doesn't matter.



Last year we played with a standard 105m by 65m pitch. This year we're going to widen it, in an effort to give our wingers more room to work with, and shorten it, to prevent opposition players from sneaking behind our line. At 90m by 85m it's almost rectangular, and we should be able to take advantage of that shape given our comparative advantages on the wings. Once we get up another level we won't be able to change our field size so drastically from the norm, as we'll be bound by the rules of the Football League. So let's play with it while we can.



The British people are going to get to know our team as the patsies for big clubs. Any publicity is good publicity, I suppose.

vs. Morecambe, July 25, 2014
Friendly


We're going from a match against team at the apex of the game to playing one that's expected to finish below us in the league. This should be a good chance to remove the sour taste from our mouths after the Arsenal debacle. We finally get to play our control strategy, but while we have plenty of possession we still lose when we can't turn that possession into goals. At this point I don't expect to get a single win from our remaining preseason matches, our last three being against Premier League sides.

Tackleford City 1-2 Morecambe



Hey, we finally get to give out jersey numbers. We're clearly in a classier league this year.

Simon O'Donnell, Box to Box Midfielder
Free Transfer




I feel that we're a bit lacking in the central midfield, and O'Donnell was available after recently being released by Manchester City, so I pick him up. He'll be a backup for now, but he's just 17 and can cover both the offensive and defensive midfield roles. Our wage budget is now up to £38,500/wk, which should be low enough that we stay in the black during the season. It's also only 60% of what we were spending last year.

vs. Tottenham, July 30, 2014
Friendly


Can I just get the money and not have to play these games?

Tackleford City 0-5 Tottenham Hotspur

vs. Everton, August 2, 2014
Friendly


We scored a goal. They scored nine.

Tackleford City 1-9 Everton

vs. Liverpool, August 5, 2014
Friendly


OK, let's get this over with.

Tackleford City 0-3 Liverpool



I feel guilty making the team play that gauntlet. But it's not like we set the world on fire in our pre-season last year, at least we're losing 5-0 to Tottenham now instead of Fleetwood. The player's morale isn't broken, which means we should be able to start the season on the right foot.



More importantly, we've got plenty of money now. At £4 million our balance sheet is three or four times the size of our immediate competition. That's up from £500,000 after we lost our sugar daddy, and is from our sales of Duchamps and Rosetti, season ticket sales, and our pre-season friendlies. Not shabby, not shabby at all.

habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 03:57 on Dec 7, 2013

TheMcD
May 4, 2013

Monaca / Subject N 2024
---------
Despair will never let you down.
Malice will never disappoint you.

Boris Ponce? England really isn't the right place for this guy to play.

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.

Camoes posted:

As a Portuguese, I guess it could be worse. Germany is always tough, Ghana might be dangerous, not expecting to much from the USA.

You thought that in 2002 too! Hah!

mfcrocker
Jan 31, 2004



Hot Rope Guy
England's draw sucks but I'm glad as gently caress we're not the USA.

sebzilla
Mar 17, 2009

Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.


mfcrocker posted:

England's draw sucks but I'm glad as gently caress we're not the USA.

Yep. Their world cup draw is bad, too.

habeasdorkus
Nov 3, 2013

Royalty is a continuous shitposting motion.

sebzilla posted:

Yep. Their world cup draw is bad, too.

Hey, at least our hinterlands aren't voting to secede from our nation! But well played.

Nissin Cup Nudist
Sep 3, 2011

Sleep with one eye open

We're off to Gritty Gritty land




I hate Ghana so much. World Cup, Virtual World Cup, doesn't matter. loving bogey teams. Sorry Bob :smith:

USA is gonna get bounced in the group stage. :smith: Maybe Ghana gets old in 6 months and Ronny gets injured we have a chance. And Torsten Frings can rot in hell.

Average Lettuce
Oct 22, 2012


habeasdorkus posted:

You thought that in 2002 too! Hah!

Shut up :negative:

KDavisJr
Jul 17, 2010

A real avatar never dies, even when it's replaced!
I'm fairly sure someone who made the draw doesn't want USA to win. It's Ghana, who sent the US packing two times in a row, and Portugal and Germany, two of Europe's best, and on top of that, having to travel a grand total of 9000 miles in the process. Also I found this pretty hilarious: http://ftw.usatoday.com/2013/12/world-cup-group-draw-united-states/

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Dias
Feb 20, 2011

by sebmojo

KDavisJr posted:

I'm fairly sure someone who made the draw doesn't want USA to win. It's Ghana, who sent the US packing two times in a row, and Portugal and Germany, two of Europe's best, and on top of that, having to travel a grand total of 9000 miles in the process. Also I found this pretty hilarious: http://ftw.usatoday.com/2013/12/world-cup-group-draw-united-states/

Eh, Portugal as one of Europe's best is stretching it (no offense, Portuguese dude). Germany is taking first easy, but you can "upset" Portugal and get over your fear of Ghana. Also, sorry, USA, your group isn't the Group of Death (maybe your death, but that doesn't count). That's D, with B as a runner-up because Chile is quite solid.

Oh, yeah. The LP. It's a cool LP. Please don't let this one die too, all FM/CM Let's Plays tend to die early and I quite enjoy sperging about soccer in them, so...

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