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None of my posts are worth reading at normal speed, let alone turbo-boosted. Save the money and buy yourself a new catheter or something.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:02
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Lowtax posted:Is this worth it to you guys? also i multitask so i dont even notice if the forums arent instantaneous Lowtax posted:myself, Rich "Hitler" Kyanka Xaris posted:There is a Donate link, I assume that uses the same cc/gateway processor? 5% isn't bad then. https://secure.somethingawful.com/products/donate.php  which apparently you could do by buying a big gift certificate in 1 transaction and using it to buy a bunch of little gift certificates to give to other people someone try this out
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Sep 4, 2019 05:03
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This was supposed to be the information superhighway, not the information superautobahn. Slow it down OP
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Sep 4, 2019 05:04
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Sid Vicious posted:Oh I don't have any money Burt I'm trying to convince someone to buy me a pizza I just meant for those who are able, I'm helping in my own way. Everyone who has loads of money please go and buy lots of avs and plat for folks and hell buy your grandma an account. Also buy me a pizza lol You sound rich
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Sep 4, 2019 05:04
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Everyone who posts here is probably used to dinosaur internet and you could probably sell a "nostalgia upgrade" that further slows down users connections to speeds, emulating early dial up days, and people would buy it to relive the exciting experience of posting on 56k
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Sep 4, 2019 05:07
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Jesustheastronaut! posted:Everyone who posts here is probably used to dinosaur internet and you could probably sell a "nostalgia upgrade" that further slows down users connections to speeds, emulating early dial up days, and people would buy it to relive the exciting experience of posting on 56k [NOT SAFE 56K]
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Sep 4, 2019 05:07
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gary oldmans diary posted:no. turn it off. the money could be better used. id rather you spend money trying to find the box wine that is right for you than that kind of money on extra extra forums speed yeah i just did it and it works good. actually very good surprisingly for spaghetti code
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Sep 4, 2019 05:07
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Xaris posted:yeah i just did it and it works good. actually very good surprisingly for spaghetti code gib cert. I need one for my next loving dumb joke
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Sep 4, 2019 05:08
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Burt Sexual posted:You sound rich You know drat well I work part time at a second hand store!
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Sep 4, 2019 05:09
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FactsAreUseless posted:When this website is slow for me it's always a Google/Twitter/Imgur/whatever site issue that's making pages load slow. Same. And given that I'm mostly browsing these days on a phone, def did not notice any exxxxtra speed
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Sep 4, 2019 05:10
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lowtax gotta make more donation custom titles i mean hell gem is obviously the best one. but what if there was a new best one 
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Sep 4, 2019 05:10
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I will say I did notice the extra speed, but it's like ~5%, maybe 10%, difference. The baseline speed for forums when there isn't some index fuckery or whatever was already very good and fast so most definitely not needed at all
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Sep 4, 2019 05:10
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Man, it is really loving fast though.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:11
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how about we limit images to 300x200 so we dont tax the processor
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Sep 4, 2019 05:13
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Shrink everyone's av to be like super tiny just so we can all laugh about tiny avs and also save bandwirdht money
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Sep 4, 2019 05:15
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I like fast Something Awful forums. Are there 3160 people that would pay $1 per month to have faster forums? Probably! If you actually figured out a way to collect those monies, would they still give more money to simply access the forums in the first place? Maybe. If SA had an Unobtanium Upgrade that cost $12 per year and gave everyone faster forums if 3160 people signed up, would you please at least try? Maybe charge annually for no-ads? I hate ads, I would pay annually to make them gently caress off. It's not unreasonable! edit: make it an SA kickstarter (all in-house not actually hosted on kickstarter), and let us help make custom ads to get people excited! Will your credit processor freak the gently caress out if you start up stuff like that? Mizaq fucked around with this message at 05:18 on Sep 4, 2019 |
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Sep 4, 2019 05:16
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I need to be able to lurk at lightening speed. This is very important. For reasons.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:17
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Mizaq posted:I like fast Something Awful forums. Are there 3160 people that would pay $1 per month to have faster forums? Probably! If you actually figured out a way to collect those monies, would they still give more money to simply access the forums in the first place? Maybe. If SA had an Unobtanium Upgrade that cost $12 per year and gave everyone faster forums if 3160 people signed up, would you please at least try? Maybe charge annually for no-ads? I hate ads, I would pay annually to make them gently caress off. It's not unreasonable! Shut up it doesn't need to be lightning fast it's a god drat vbulletin web forum for saying I'm gay and bitching about video games, Lowtax has a failing body and tons of debt because of how hosed up the American health care system is and the last thing he needs is a massive bill he wasn't expecting so that the webm of a goat kicking another goat over loads a but faster for you sorry for saying shut up
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Sep 4, 2019 05:18
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I need to find a trustworthy sysadmin and php coder who don't turn out to be unreliable dickheads
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Sep 4, 2019 05:19
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Can we get an option for a generic gift cert
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Sep 4, 2019 05:20
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Lowtax posted:I need to find a trustworthy sysadmin and php coder who don't turn out to be unreliable dickheads Use patreon cash to pay one then. It's the only way.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:20
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Lowtax posted:I need to find a trustworthy sysadmin and php coder who don't turn out to be unreliable dickheads I truly hope you find someone to help with the backend stuff and if I knew anything at all about web coding I would help you in a heart beat Rich, your website is responsible for a huge majority of my entertainment every month and I hope that it's here for a long time still for me to enjoy. If I hear of anyone I know being a web code guy I'll send them your way for sure. Please take care of yourself and your family first and foremost and I hope you are able to pay your bills still this month your mortgage etc
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Sep 4, 2019 05:21
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I'm not unreliable but I am a dickhead and can't code anything without copious notes from Google and Githubs.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:23
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is cloudflare your hosting company as well?
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Sep 4, 2019 05:23
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can’t you just host on GitHub pages for free?
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Sep 4, 2019 05:23
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Lowtax posted:I need to find a trustworthy sysadmin and php coder who don't turn out to be unreliable dickheads
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Sep 4, 2019 05:23
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SilvergunSuperman posted:It does seem lightning quick, but fuuuck that price tag.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:25
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I also didn't notice any difference. Shut it down. Can you save money by turning off 'Q's? I think we can get by without them.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:29
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Xaris posted:Might worth asking in cobol/yospos, there's a lot of knowledgeable and decent people these days that have been here for almost 20 years (most of the actually lovely people have been washed out and are gone); however, i also believe zdr come out of yospos. so idk Please dont hire any more god damned goons, if you actually have a gig where you want to pay someone thousands to fix a shitted up DB then just go to a professional hiring place. Don't hire a goon
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Sep 4, 2019 05:33
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We are not to be trusted
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Sep 4, 2019 05:34
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Someone order me a pizza please
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Sep 4, 2019 05:35
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Lowtax posted:I need to find a trustworthy sysadmin and php coder who don't turn out to be unreliable dickheads "Annoucement: Looking for a sysadmin / php coder that will work for lent and dog food. Must provide urine specimen for drug testing (weed okay). Required good posting history with no posts in C-SPAM. Thanks. --Lowtax"
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Sep 4, 2019 05:36
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save some money this place is just a retirement home for shitposters
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Sep 4, 2019 05:37
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putting multiple $5 gift certs in cart at the same time worked fine once i enabled cookies properly. whoops
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Sep 4, 2019 05:39
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I remember buying a service from a goon once (hosting) he vanished without a word or a chance to backup data.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:39
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Definitely not worth it, but it’s very sweet of you to ask.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:41
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I literally never post, but dude save your money. I haven't really noticed a difference in load speeds and certainly not one that would be worth 3k/month.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:42
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Guess I'm buying an Archives upgrade now.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:42
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Now that you mentioned it it seems faster. But save your bux mister lowtax.
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Sep 4, 2019 05:44
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i bought a $15 av cert and re-bought no-ads (goes away with ban) https://forums.somethingawful.com/member.php?action=accountfeatures fully activated maxed out account
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Sep 4, 2019 05:45
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