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Unscheduled Stop Star Cruiser X41 was on a mission to deep space traveling at 25C when all forward momentum was abruptly halted. The only thing that saved the crew from becoming a monomolecular paste on the forward bulkhead was that all forward momentum inside the ship was also arrested. For an infinitesimal amount of time, every atom within the volume of the ship was at temperature absolute zero. Once the crew had recovered from the shock of being frozen in space, they took stock of what had happened. "We've come to a dead stop, captain," was all the navigator was able to say about the situation. "How is that possible? Our megadrive was on full blast. We were up to twenty five times the speed of light. You can't shed that much momentum in a fraction of a second just like that," said the captain. "Bring up the exterior monitors. Maybe we hit something." "Anything we hit at that speed should have been blasted into atoms, and us along with it," said the first mate. The exterior monitors flickered to life. The bridge crew gasped. "What is it?" asked the first mate. "It looks like a big, red orb of some kind," replied the captain. Indeed, a glowing, red orb nearly filled the screen. "I'm not showing a giant red orb on any of our charts," said the navigator. "Try communicating with it. Hail them," ordered the captain. The radio operator nodded and started fiddling with dials, calling out a greeting on every frequency. After several minutes of repeated attempts, the radio operator shook his head. "No response, captain," he said. "Scans are inconclusive, captain," said the first mate. "Whatever it is does not register any mass, yet I'm reading complex energy patterns across all spectrums." "Do you think it would let us leave?" asked the navigator. "You talk about it as if it's alive," said the first mate. "We've seen no evidence of that." "It's unlikely to be a natural phenomenon," interjected the captain. "But Nav is right, it's not our job to ponder the mysteries of the universe, we've got somewhere to be." He turned to the helm. "Bring the megadrive back online." "Aye, captain." The helmsman started flipping switches on his console and soon the ship thrummed with life. "One quarter megadrive," said the captain. The thrum deepened. Alarms blared just as a tremor ran through the ship, followed by a loud groan and the sound of buckling metal. "ALL STOP!" yelled the captain and first mate simultaneously. The emergency cutouts stopped the engines faster than the helmsman could even lift his arm to flip the switch. "What happened?" barked the captain. "Damage report." The intercom squeaked and the chief engineer's voice came over the speaker. "What happened is the megadrive tried to move forward, but the bow didn't. If it weren't for the emergency cutouts, the ship would have crushed itself like a soda can!" he exclaimed. "If we can't move forward, do you think we could move backward?" wondered the navigator. "It's worth a try." The captain turned to the helm. "Reverse engines, slow." There was another change in pitch as the ship's forward thrusters fired. This time the groans went on longer before the automatic cutouts kicked in. "What happened this time?" demanded the captain. "The superheated gas from the forward thrusters stopped dead as soon as it was level with the bow," explained the chief engineer. "Forward thrusters fired until they became clogged by their own exhaust." "drat." The captain bit his knuckle in frustration. "We can't move forward, we can't retreat." "We're trapped," said the first officer. "Can't we fight our way out?" asked the weapons officer. The captain nodded, resolve hardening on his features. "If this thing is a natural phenomenon, it's a hazard and should be destroyed. If it's an intelligence, I think its shown ample proof that it's hostile." said the captain. "Can we bring our laser turrets to bear on the orb?" "The orb is currently within the firing arcs of turrets two and four," answered the weapons officer. "Comms, signal a warning on all frequencies. If we receive no response, we'll open fire," ordered the captain. The ship waited in silence. The captain counted down the seconds until the time limit proposed by his ultimatum. There was no response. "Fire!" ordered the captain. The ship's laser turrets blazed with fearsome energy, lashing out with coherent beams of ruby light. The moment the beams came parallel with the ship's bow, they froze in space like red icicles. The turrets continued to fire, pumping out more energy until the barrels began to glow. First red, then orange, then white. The beams finally flickered to a stop as the barrels curled up and the laser emitters melted. Alarms blared on the bridge and the crew was momentarily absorbed with firefighting efforts on the gun deck. The captain was starting to lose his cool. They tried the megadrive again and an entire frame compressed like an accordion before the emergency cutouts kicked in. Three crewmen were crushed instantly. They tried lateral thrusters. The ship rolled like a dowel on a lathe, but could not move from side to side any more than it could move forward or back. Before long, the local space around the ship was choked with exhaust particles. "The ship has its own atmosphere, captain," reported the first mate. "Fifteen pounds per square inch." "No matter what we try, we can't escape! Trapped like rats!" the Navigator's voice was on the edge of panic. "Can't we send out a distress signal?" asked the helmsman. "There's no guarantee that radio waves can travel any further from the ship than laser beams," observed the first mate. "Even if a signal could get out, it would be a minimum of sixty days before the signal reached Earth, and another sixty days for a rescue ship to reach us." "And that's assuming the rescue ship doesn't suffer the same fate once it arrives." The captain was biting his knuckle again. "We may have to consider the possibility that we're stuck here for an indefinite period." The announcement went out that all hands were to take an inventory of supplies and that food and water were on minimal rations effective immediately. Morale on Starship X41 degenerated quickly after that as news of the ship's dire predicament spread. "It's bedlam out there," said the weapons officer. "The crew is ready to riot." The captain was on the verge of tears. "What is happening? Why is the red orb doing this to us?" An alarm chirped and the first mate bent over the SPACEDAR scope to investigate. "Captain, I'm picking up another ship on sensors," said the first mate. "Approaching fast on a course perpendicular to ours." "What sort of ship?" asked the captain. "Unknown, sir," replied the first mate. "Closest point of approach, one thousand kilometers off our bow in approximately three minutes." The bridge waited with baited breath as the CPA timer counted down. At zero, the ship trembled as the unknown vessel blasted past, its vast hull a blur crossing the screen. The trembling subsided and the bridge was silent once again. "What the hell was—" The captain stopped midsentence, mouth agape as he watched the screen. The orb had changed color from red to green. "Captain, the cloud of exhaust gases around our ship is dissipating," announced the first mate. "I'm reading a slight forward drift," announced the navigator. "Helm, engage forward thrusters. Gently," ordered the captain. "Ahead thrust confirmed. Speed five KPS," replied the helmsman. "Can we engage the megadrive?" asked the captain. "I wouldn't dare push us harder than one quarter thrust, captain," warned the chief engineer. "Captain, our ship has sustained heavy damage, I suggest we turn around and return to Earth for repairs," said the first mate. "I agree. Helm, bring us about," ordered the captain. As Starship X41 limped back to Earth, the crew pondered the experience they'd just endured. "Captain, what was that thing?" asked the navigator. "Call me crazy, lieutenant," said the captain. "But I'd say we just hit a red light." The End Applewhite fucked around with this message at 19:02 on May 7, 2020 |
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May 7, 2020 16:54
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Credit goes to my seven year old daughter for suggesting that the spinning cube encountered by the Enterprise in the TOS episode The Corbomite Maneuver was some kind of cosmic stop sign.
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May 7, 2020 17:02
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The Acid That Could Melt Anything "Behold, I've invented an acid so strong it can melt anything!" said Dr. Burgerman. "If it can melt anything, how is it being contained in that beaker?" asked the lab assistant. "I also invented an unmeltable beaker," explained Dr. Burgerman. "I invented that first." "Oh." the lab assistant shrugged. "That makes sense." The lab assistant sniffed the air. "What's that burning smell?" he asked. "The acid!" Dr. Burgerman exclaimed. "It can't melt through the beaker, so it's melting a hole laterally through the fourth dimension instead!" "The acid is melting time itself?" asked the lab assistant. "Indeed! We've got to neutralize it before—" But it was too late. They'd been melted into skeletons for years. The End
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May 7, 2020 17:27
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The Most The very old man had travelled across the world for this moment. He had liquidated a portion his sizable fortune to finance it. He was a pauper in his mind when they finally uncovered the box, buried in a field somewhere in Pennsylvania. But it was all worth it to him. Yes, he only had several million dollars left in his account, plus his palatial estate. He was barely surviving. But that was nothing compared to what he hoped to find. His father had spent most of his life searching for the box, and he was just the latest in a long line. Tragic lives, all of them, driven by obsession over the box. The simple wooden box, completely unmarked, which looked to have been made by a completely unskilled hand. His father had been married 3 times, each ending in divorce, and he'd died alone and screaming. His grandfather had completely disappeared, but his bones had been found half-buried in a riverbed a decade later. And the less said about his great-great Grandfather, who decided to search for the box in the arctic, the better. But the very old man had found it, guided by the work of his ancestors and by the millions of dollars he had thrown at every archaeologist, linguist, historian, and researcher that was willing to speak to him. All of that, and all he knew was that the box contained, according to a note written in 1791, "The most... in the world" It had driven his family to madness. It had led him around the world. He'd never married, never had children. The cradled the box in his hands and shooed away the sizable crowd surrounding him. This was his, he was the one who sacrificed for it. He was the one who spent money on it. It belonged to him. He opened the box, which wasn't even locked. Inside was a mirror. Under it, a note. Which said: "The real treasure was inside you the whole time." The old man promptly died of a heart attack and dropped the note. He never read the other side. A lowly research assistant saw the fluttering paper and grabbed it, then read the back aloud. "Actually the real treasure is inside this box. It's the most powerful curse in the world, one that only targets the extremely rich. All of them should be dropping dead as you read this. Assuming you aren't rich, because if so you're already dead and unable to read this." The rest of the team stood around nodding, realizing that this made sense and was a satisfying twist ending. They were eager to explore the new world born from the box.
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May 7, 2020 18:16
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I'm guessing the curse makers didn't deploy their curse right away because they themselves were rich and wanted to live full lives before screwing over future generations (of rich people). Classic rich person MO.
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May 7, 2020 18:24
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Applewhite posted:Credit goes to my seven year old daughter for suggesting that the spinning cube encountered by the Enterprise in the TOS episode The Corbomite Maneuver was some kind of cosmic stop sign. Smart kid, good job!
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May 7, 2020 18:50
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The Sex Formula Dr Sex, PhD was the worlds greatest researcher into Sex. He had another name, but noone used it. He was just known as Dr Sex, the Sex Dr. Any time there was sex related news he was called on to comment. He had the world's respect. For years Dr Sex had been researching "the Sex Formula", which would be the key to perfect sex. His failures had led to whole new theories of erogenous zones, positions, toys, pornography, and erotic philosophies. But he had not yet perfected The Formula. In general however, the overall quality of sex had gone up 200%. At his laboratory he had access to the brightest minds, the best computers, well stocked experimental setups, unlimited funding. His pan-gendered and multiracial staff was comprised of every possible discipline. Doctors, plumbers, philosophers, artists, chemical engineers, chefs, cyber jockeys and more worked long hard hours in pursuit of the formula. It was very serious business. One day there was a commotion in the control center. A printout had come out of the mainframe. One of the division leads was looking at it in shock. They grabbed it, walked several paces, passed it to someone else, whispered in the ear of their nearest colleague and instantly became engaged in erotic activities. The printout passed this way for several minutes, closer and closer to Dr Sex's office, leaving Ecstasy in its wake. Eventually Dr Sex's chief assistant was able to grab the printout, and using their greatest force of will, was able to bring it to his office without looking at it and deliver it into Dr Sex's hand. Dr Sex read the printout. He know instantly this was it. The Sex Formula. The truth of it dawned on him. They had solved it. In reading the formula all his 78 erogenous zones began swelling with blood, well beyond their bursting point. Within seconds he was dead. Dr Sex stood at the entrance to heaven. There was a celestial being on a golf cart waiting for him. He was told they were in a rush. It was explained that the knowledge he contained was so important that they wouldn't even subject him to the usual trials of judgement. They drove the golf cart down a very long corridor to a gaint ornate door and rushed inside. It was God's chambers. God sat on their throne, surrounded by their countless, obviously unsatisfied partners. Dr Sex knew exactly why he was there. He ran up to God's throne and whispered in God's ear The Sex Formula. "*Low Long Whistle* Heeeeeey Baybeeee"
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May 8, 2020 02:56
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It really makes one wonder if a real sex formula will ever be found.
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May 8, 2020 03:43
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If you need to fill a spare page in the magazine or just add some graphic content I got you covered with the long awaited return of my award winning comic strip.
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May 8, 2020 09:18
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By popular demand posted:If you need to fill a spare page in the magazine or just add some graphic content I got you covered with the long awaited return of my award winning comic strip. What are you waiting for? This is exactly the kind of content we need!
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May 8, 2020 13:57
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A man's work is never over
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May 8, 2020 14:37
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The Ghost Next Door I couldn't sleep at night because my neighbor kept making an awful racket. "Woooooooo!" cried my neighbor's unearthly voice. "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Finally I decided to do something about it. I knocked on my neighbor's front door. There was no answer. So I phased through the door and hovered into their living room. My neighbor was sitting on his couch, cheering at NASCAR on TV. "Woooooo!" he yelled. "WOOOOOOO! Go Dale Earnhardt Junior!" I appeared in front of him. "What the—" he almost choked on a piece of popcorn. I stretched out my hand toward him, the tip of my finger just inches from his nose. I opened my mouth and the flesh melted off my face so that I looked like a screaming skeleton. "STOP MAKING SO MUCH NOISE!" I howled. "YOU ARE DISTURBING MY ETERNAL SLUMBER!" My neighbor screamed! "Aieeeeeeeee! A ghost!" He bolted from the room and out of the house. He ran down the street in his boxer shorts, screaming incoherently. Have you guessed yet? I was the ghost next door! The End (?)
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May 8, 2020 16:07
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By popular demand posted:A man's work is never over When will millennials learn?
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May 8, 2020 16:08
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Applewhite posted:The Ghost Next Door I really enjoyed writing this story. The beauty of this one is that if you go back and read it, the subtle clues were there all along that the narrator was the ghost.
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May 8, 2020 16:22
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Applewhite posted:I really enjoyed writing this story. The beauty of this one is that if you go back and read it, the subtle clues were there all along that the narrator was the ghost. It was also spooky the whole way through.
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May 8, 2020 16:26
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The Potion of Eternal Life "Behold, I've invented a potion of eternal life!" declared Dr. Eternus. "Once I drink it, I shall de-age until my body is as it was in the prime of my life and live that way forever!" "One could make the argument that mortality is an important part of being human, and that by living forever, we lose an essential part of ourselves," said Dr. Morgan. "A human who could never die wouldn't really be human anymore. They'd be an abomination." "By that logic why don't you just kill yourself right now?" asked Dr. Eternus, a little testily. "Well... Because a long life is better than a short life," said Dr. Morgan. "So it stands to reason an eternal life would be even better," said Dr. Eternus. "Well, no, because you still have to die when the time is right," said Dr. Morgan. "And when is the right time? Eighty years? Ninety years?" asked Dr. Eternus. "A hundred?" "Between seventy and a hundred I guess..." mumbled Dr. Morgan. "That seems really arbitrary. So someone who lives to be a hundred and one has become an abomination?" Dr. Eternus stood with his arms across his chest and tapped his foot. "No... but once you live to be that old your body is so frail, why would you still want to live at that point?" asked Dr. Morgan. "That's why my potion de-ages you to your twenties," said Dr. Eternus. "But you see, growing old is also an essential part of the human experience," said Dr. Morgan. "That sounds like some bullshit people made up to convince themselves that getting old and dying weren't so bad when actually they're the worst," said Dr. Eternus. "You're making a big mistake, Eturnus," said Dr. Morgan. "Tell you what. If, after a thousand years of eternal youth, I feel sad and regret living past a hundred, you can say 'I told you so.'" With those words, Dr. Eternus drank the potion. A moment later, Dr. Eternus began to choke and gag. His face turned blue. "I switched your potion with cyanide," explained Dr. Morgan. "I knew that the only way to convince you of the importance of death was for you to experience it for yourself." Dr. Eternus tried to speak, but all that issued from his lips was a spray of green foam. He dropped to the floor, dead. "That will teach you to sleep with my wife, you son of a bitch," said Dr. Morgan. The End
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May 8, 2020 17:11
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May 8, 2020 18:26
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The Amazing Boomer also has an amazing physique.
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May 8, 2020 18:30
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That's because he knows the value of HARD WORK And proper nutrition.
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May 8, 2020 18:51
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The Day Frantic the Speedhog Came Out of My Sega and Beat Up Jimmy Bamboolio Jimmy Bamboolio was beating me up (as usual!). He had a fat ugly face with bad breath and crooked teeth. While he was hitting me, my Sega Game Gear (copyright, TM and (c) Sega of America) fell out of my pocket. "What's this? Some kind of nerd game for babies?" Jimmy Bamboolio laughed. "No, please! That was a Christmas present!" I cried. "My mommy didn't buy me a Sega for Christmas," said Jimmy Bamboolio. "She just bought a bunch of coke for herself and then my dad beat me with a belt!" I don't know why I said what I said next, but all of a sudden I was filled with courage and bravery. "Maybe your parents don't love you because you're such a jerk," I told him. Jimmy Bamboolio's face turned bright red and I swear I saw a tear in his eye (served him right!). Then he gritted his teeth and started to growl. He lifted up my Sega Game Gear and smashed it on the ground! "Nooooooo!" I cried as I watched the shattered fragments of my most precious possession scattered to the four winds. "Hey, Jimmy Bamboolio!" said a strange but somehow familiar voice. I looked over at the voice and I was shocked to see my favorite videogame character, Frantic the Speedhog, standing there in real life! Jimmy Bamboolio rubbed his eyes. "Am I going crazy?" "You must be crazy if you think I'm going to let you get away with picking on my best friend!" said Frantic. Then he curled into a ball and launched himself at Jimmy Bamboolio. "OW!" Jimmy screamed as Frantic's sharp quills stabbed his skin. "Get ready for a beatdown!" laughed Frantic. Frantic jumped on Jimmy Bamboolio and punched every inch of his body with fists that moved faster than the speed of sound. I laughed as I heard every bone in Jimmy Bamboolio's body shatter. The fight was over in five seconds. Jimmy Bamboolio hadn't even landed one punch. He lay there in a pool of his own blood, every inch of his skin was black and blue. "Is he dead?" I asked. "I only used non-lethal attacks," said Frantic. "He can't learn a lesson if he dies." "Thanks, Frantic!" I said. Frantic winked at me. "No let's see about fixing your Sega Game Gear (copyright TM and (c) Sega of America)!" He ran around the broken parts of my game gear until he formed a tornado. When the tornado stopped, the Game Gear was fixed! Frantic hopped into the screen. "I'll see you next time!" His voice came out of the game's speaker. "By the way, there's a secret powerup behind the waterfall in the Sunflower Zone!" "How can I ever repay you?" I asked. Frantic looked directly at me through the screen. "I need you to create a bride for me. If you draw her just right, she will come to life and appear in the game as a playable character," said Frantic. I nodded. "I swear I will dedicate my life to fulfilling your request." And that's exactly what I did. 
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May 9, 2020 03:23
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The Golden Goose Josef Stalin (no relation) was a goose farmer. He lived in a thatched-roof cottage with his greedy wife, Margaret. Despite Margaret's greed (or perhaps, because of it), the couple was very poor because they kept dumping their money into Multi Level Marketing scams. One night, as Josef and Margaret slept, a strange comet blazed briefly in the sky above the farm. The next morning when Josef went out to inspect the goose nests, he found that one of the geese had laid what appeared to be a golden egg! Not believing his eyes, Josef picked up the egg, tapped on it, weighed it in his hands. There could be no doubt about it: it was solid gold! He'd had a lot of experience handling gold in the past because during one of the brief times he and his wife had money, they'd spent it all on gold bullion. Later they had to sell the gold at 1/10th its original price in order to pay their mortgage. "God in Heaven! It's a miracle!" cried Josef. He ran to his wife and showed her the egg. "This is all you found?" scolded Margaret. "Get out there and find more golden eggs! This measly egg will barely put a dent in our debt!" Josef went back and searched all the nests, but there were no more golden eggs to be found. Meanwhile, Margaret went to town and sold the egg at one of those "We Buy Gold!" places. Instead of using the money to pay off some of their debt, Margaret immediately went on a shopping spree. She returned home with armloads of shopping bags. "Where are the other golden eggs?" she demanded. "I barely got a pittance from that lousy gold-buyer, I had to choose between the red pumps and the white ones because I couldn't afford both!" "Sorry, dear, but I checked all the eggs and that was the only one made of gold. Maybe tomorrow there will be a new one," said Josef. "There'd better be." Margaret's eyes narrowed. There was! The very next day, Josef Stalin was out tending his geese when there, in the exact same nest was another golden egg! Josef and Margaret were overjoyed. They immediately went out and sold the egg for a down payment on a new car. And so it went. Each day, there was a shiny golden egg in the goose nest. Josef and Margaret bought all kinds of new things. Not a single penny went toward their mounting debt, nor did they bother to invest any of the money they got from selling golden eggs. After several weeks, the problem became apparent. "You're spending money faster than you're making it," explained the couple's new accountant. "At your current rate of spending, you'd need three golden eggs per day just to break even." "You need to find that goose and squeeze more eggs out of it," Margaret told Josef. That night, Josef camped out and spied on the nest. Sometime around midnight, he saw a goose waddle over to the nest where they'd been finding the golden eggs, squat down, pop out an egg, then waddle away. He tackled the goose. "Got you!" he cried. The goose honked and hissed and struggled, but Josef was a veteran goose-wrangler and soon had the bird trussed and subdued. "I got it!" said Josef triumphantly. "I got the golden goose!" "Good job for once, you dunderhead!" said Margaret. "Now, let's cut it open so we can get all its eggs at once!" "That's not how geese work," said Josef. "Do you think that geese just store a lifetime supply of eggs inside their bodies and just dispense them one at a time?" "This goose lays golden eggs. Obviously it's not like a normal goose," countered Margaret. Josef shrugged. "Can't argue with that." Margaret grabbed a carving knife and sliced open the golden goose. Half a dozen solid gold eggs immediately tumbled out of the wound. "I told you! I told you!" Margaret threw down the knife and started gathering up the eggs, which had rolled every which way. Josef, however, was still looking at the goose. He was wondering why there was no blood. While he watched, another several eggs tumbled out of the slit in the goose's belly. "Margaret, darling?" Josef tapped his wife on the back. "What is it?" she asked. "I'm busy!" "Do geese normally have wires and cogs?" asked Josef. The goose corpse on the table was smoking and whirring. Severed wires sparked and overtaxed motors began to emit puffs of smoke. Golden eggs still inside the creature's belly clinked against one another and another dozen fell out of the slit while Josef watched. "Who cares?" Margaret struggled to stand under the weight of the dozens of golden eggs she carried in her apron. "Our money troubles are over forever!" The clinking sounds of eggs inside the goose's belly increased in frequency. There was now an egg popping out of the goose's wound every second. Soon it was two per second, then three. "It's a fountain of infinite wealth!" cackled Margaret. Josef and Margaret were ankle deep in golden eggs by the time they realized they might have a problem on their hands. By now, the eggs were popping out in a steady stream rat-a-tat-a-tat like a machine gun. "If things keep up at this rate, the value of gold will crash! All these eggs will be worthless!" said Josef. "We've got to plug up that goose!" declared Margaret. Margaret waded through the golden eggs to get a needle and twine, but couldn't pinch the hole closed long enough to start stitching, the pressure of eggs popping out was too high. By now the room was knee deep in eggs. "We've got to get out of here, or we'll be crushed!" yelled Josef. Josef and Margaret fled for their lives. By the next morning, the entire house was buried under a rising mountain of golden eggs. The mountain's base covered several acres before the authorities realized what was happening and tried to mount a response. By then it was too late. The eggs multiplied too quickly to be hauled away, and there were no weapons that could destroy such a large volume of gold quickly enough. A tide of golden eggs washed over the countryside. Entire towns had to be abandoned. Crops were flattened. The mountain of eggs grew and grew. It didn't take long for people to point the finger at Josef and Margaret. "This lady brought a gold egg to sell in town every single day" said the gold buyer. "I wonder if she has anything to do with this." The townsfolk caught Josef and Margaret at the train station, trying to flee in disguise. They were given away by their briefcase full of money. "Get them!" The townsfolk mobbed Josef and Margaret, pelting the couple to death with golden eggs. Unwittingly, the mob had sealed the fate of the world. Josef and Margaret had died before they could reveal the existence of the golden goose or its location, thus making it impossible for anyone to mount an expedition to destroy the source of the eggs. The golden tide spread and spread. North America was completely smothered by golden eggs within a year. South America followed a few years after that. The expansion of eggs slowed down a little when the flood reached the coasts, but trillions of eggs pouring into the ocean caused rising seas that drowned most of the rest of the planet's landmass in short order. The last bastion of humanity survived in the Himalayas for nearly a decade before they, too were finally subsumed. Years passed. A survey ship from the United Galactic Federation passing through the Sol system on its regular patrol noted the deviation in planetary orbit since the last survey thirty years prior. It appeared as though the third planet had undergone a dramatic increase in mass. Once in orbit, the source of the change became obvious. "Well, captain," reported science officer Zlarg, "I guess now we know what happened to that Gold Originating Organism (Synthetic Electronic) that went missing on our last patrol." "The natives must have picked it up and tried to tamper with it," said Captain Bergog "Once that G.O.O.(S.E.) went haywire, their civilization was doomed," said Zlarg. "There'll be hell to pay for this," said Captain Bergog. As the commanding officer, keeping track of the ship's equipment was his responsibility. "Looks like my goose is cooked," sighed the captain. The End
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May 9, 2020 15:37
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The Color out of Space "It's black," said Billy Gunderson. "The Color Out of Space is black." The End
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May 9, 2020 15:44
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Dick Zipper, Future P.I. Neo New York 2040 8:40PM "Glad you're here, Dick," said Police Chief Randall. "We've got a real stumper." Dick surveyed the crime scene. The victim was a 37 year old male named Frank Jimpers. He'd been bashed in the back of the head and was lying face first in a pool of blood. The door was locked from the inside when the body was found. Dick nodded. He reached into his trenchcoat and pulled out a small pistol with a display monitor on the back. This was his Murderer Detector Beam. After adjusting a few dials on the device, he swept the beam over the body of Frank Jimpers and then consulted the display. "Frank Jimpers was murdered at eight PM by Greg Ferguson," said Dick. "He lives in the apartment directly above Frank." "How is it possible that the door was locked from the inside?" asked the police chief. Frank put away his Murderer Detector Beam and pulled out his handheld problem solving computer. He punched the question into the computer with the mini-keyboard. A moment later, the computer chirped and Dick read the answer off the screen. "Greg Ferguson used a remote door locking device he bought on the black market," said Dick. "We'll add that to our list of charges," said the police chief. "Thanks for helping out, Dick. I accidentally left my Murder Detection Beam and problem solving computer at home." "No problem, chief." Dick touched the brim of his fedora and showed himself out. Another case closed by Dick Zipper, Future P.I. The End
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May 10, 2020 03:42
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It’s time for the readers to speak up. Do you want to see more sci-fi? Fantasy? Horror? The magazine has been a little light on fantasy lately. Discuss the stories you’ve read. Which are your favorites? Some of the stories hint at bigger worlds to be explored, are there any in particular you want to see more of? I, for one, am wondering what happens next in Day of the Nightstriders. Also don’t worry, there’s more Li’l Beepy coming soon!
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May 10, 2020 14:10
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May 10, 2020 15:31
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A Strongo type adventure would be nice, also more from the future!
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May 10, 2020 15:32
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Toughy posted:A Strongo type adventure would be nice, also more from the future! I’ve been mulling over new Strongo adventures. That little hiatus I took really messed up my cadence and it’s been tough to write one I like.
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May 10, 2020 15:53
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Applewhite posted:I’ve been mulling over new Strongo adventures. That little hiatus I took really messed up my cadence and it’s been tough to write one I like. Strong was great but it doesn't need to be him, persay another fantasy in another world would be welcome too!
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May 10, 2020 15:56
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MORE FROM THE FUTUREquote:The greedy businessman pounded his desk.
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May 10, 2020 16:28
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As great as some of these series are (I'm looking at you, Beepy) I myself have greatly enjoyed the one-offs, y'all went through a swath of pulp tropes like a stampede and it was all great. A Fancy Hat has been especially voluminous and funny. I'm inspired to try more one-and-done parodies myself, so keep those coming please everybody, I can't get enough. The second wave is also where we'll have to start reaching beyond the classics we've already hit on, so I look forward to that. As for which genres are missing I agree we could have more fantasy. More Strongo is always good, since he sort of covers the old-school Conan angle on fantasy maybe somebody could skew more modern and start hitting D&D tropes, like maybe an Elfquest type thing? The genre that's almost completely missing is a western, cowboy stories are a solid chunk of pulp magazines throughout their history so there's lots of ground there still to cover. Think Louis L'Amour or Zane Gray. And as for Nightstriders I am going to try and finish part 3 tonight! Thanks everybody for doing this, what a cool thread!
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May 10, 2020 18:32
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BoldFrankensteinMir posted:......... pulp magazines....... 
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May 10, 2020 18:57
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Mo' Speed, Mo' Problems The atmosphere was tense with anticipation at mission control. On the launchpad, humanity's first Faster Than Light vessel stood like a silver needle. Everything about the ship conveyed a sense of speed. Even the ship's name, 'YEAGER,' was stenciled in a futuristic font that looked like it was zooming by at a thousand miles per hour. The director of NASA held a press conference in front of the launchpad. "Mr. Director, how fast does the ship go?" asked a reporter from Channel Five. "The Yeager is fitted with a new propulsion system that we call 'The Infinity Drive,'" answered the director. "So named because, once activated, the drive will propel the ship to infinite velocity." "Infinite velocity?" asked the reporter for clarification. "Yes, once the drive is turned on, the ship will be moving so fast, it will occupy every point in the universe simultaneously," explained the director. "The farthest reaches of the universe will be within our grasp." "What do you say to critics who claim that a ship occupying every point in the universe at infinite speeds would also collide with every point at infinite speeds, thus destroying the entire universe?" asked a reporter for Heil Hitler News (formerly Fox News). "When the drive is active, the ship is in a state of quantum uncertainty," explained the director. "It occupies every point in the universe simultaneously, but in another sense, it does not occupy any point in the universe." "How would it be possible to navigate at such speeds?" asked Channel Six. "It's a matter of collapsing the ship's quantum waveform at a known location. In this case, we've placed an entangled particle on the moon that is matched with a partner onboard the Yeager," said the director. "If everything goes as planned, the Yeager will appear on the moon within a split second of activating its drive." Flashbulbs crackled like machine guns as the assembled press continued to bombard the director with questions. "I'm afraid that's all we have time for right now. The launch is scheduled to begin momentarily," said the director. Together, he and the press adjourned to the observation bunker as the countdown began. 3... 2... 1... Blastoff! The Yeager's engines blazed, a white so bright even the team in mission control reflexively shielded their eyes from the light on the monitors. No sooner had the Yeager's tail fins lifted up from the landing pad than the ship exploded into a ball of fire! It was pandemonium at mission control. How was this possible? Every square millimetre of the ship had been checked and double checked. The mathematicians poured over the equations, searching for where they had gone wrong. They found the answer in the wreckage of the ship. "There's too much debris here," observed one of the scientists. "Not all of this is from the Yeager." Sure enough, once they'd reassembled all the parts they could find, they discovered they'd gathered up not one, but two ships. The familiar, needle shape of the Yeager and... A flying saucer! After some more searching, they found what appeared to be the saucer's pilot. It looked like a six-legged frog that steered the ship with a pair of prehensile tongues, though the body was so mangled by the crash it was really only their best guess. "How is this possible?" asked the director. "Where did that other ship come from?" Dr. Jingleberry, the inventor of the Infinity Drive, was the first to propose an explanation. "The Yeager successfully achieved infinite velocity," said Dr. Jingleberry. "Which means that for a brief instant, it occupied every point in the universe simultaneously." "I'm familiar with the principle of the Infinity Drive," said the NASA director. "Well, any other Infinity Drive operating anywhere in the universe would operate by the same principle," continued Dr. Jingleberry. Another scientist at the table was starting to catch on. "It was a collision!" said Dr. Berthold-Watts "Precisely." Dr. Jingleberry gestured with the stem of his pipe. "Some unfortunate space traveler, perhaps from the opposite end of the universe, was out for a space jaunt in his flying saucer when he collided with the Yeager." "But there could be millions of ships zooming around us every second!" said Dr. Berthold-Watts. "How will we know when its safe to try the drive?" "The same way they do," said Dr. Jingleberry. "And how is that?" asked the director. "I expect we'll find out very soon..." answered Dr. Jingleberry. One week later, the answer arrived. A silver sphere appeared with a thunderclap and a flash of light over the launchpad where the Yeager had once stood. The sphere hovered momentarily before extending a tripod of metal legs and settling to the ground. The NASA scientists gathered around the sphere in awe. A hatch irised open on the front of the sphere and a ramp descended from the opening. Something like a soccerball covered with eyes and tentacles tumbled down the ramp and rolled to a stop at the scientists' feet. The scientists shuffled backwards away from the strange creature. "GREETINGS EARTHLINGS!" blared the quivering ball in a piercing voice. "I AM OFFICER CZERNACK, REPRESENTATIVE OF THE UNIVERSAL SPACE-TRAFFIC CONTROL BOARD!" The scientists all winced and covered their ears. "Please, you don't have to shout," said the director. "Forgive me," said Czernack. "The atmosphere of my home planet is much thinner than that of your world. Is this better?" "Much," said the director. The other scientists cautiously uncovered their ears. "As I was saying," said Czernack. "I represent the Universal Space-Traffic Control board. On behalf of the universal community, welcome to the fraternity of space travel." "T-thank you," said the director. "Forgive our delay in contacting you. This was the earliest window available," said Czernack. "As you no doubt have learned, the Infinity Drive can be hazardous. Every species in the universe that discovers the secret of the Infinity Drive announces their discovery by crashing into another ship." "So you represent the organization that coordinates all the Infinity Drives in the Universe?" asked Dr. Jingleberry. "Correct," said Czernack. A creature that looked like an upside-down gorilla in a spacesuit emerged from the opening in Czernack's ship. It was carrying a large crate in its bulky arms. Several other gorilla creatures followed it out, each carrying some heavy luggage. "It will be several weeks before my crew and I can depart your planet," said Czernack. "We will spend that time educating you on intergalactic travel protocols and training your team in the operation of the scheduling machines." A pair of gorilla things started setting up some kind of drilling apparatus on the lawn nearby. "Excuse me, what are they doing?" asked the director. "Oh, don't worry about them," said Czernack. "They're just installing the Compliance Incentive." "The what?" asked the director. "Just a little gadget that will help discourage misuse of the Infinity Drive in the future. You're excused from liability for your first accident because there's no way you could have known what would happen when you first turned on the drive. In the future, however, any further deviations from travel protocol will be penalized," said Czernack. "Penalized how?" The director's heart was in his stomach. Things were moving much too fast. "We detonate an antimatter bomb inside the core of your planet and blow it to smithereens," Czernack said casually. "Now, let's talk about your subscription plans." The little round alien pivoted the conversation before the NASA director could object. "The basic plan will give you a three millisecond window once every ten years, but you can upgrade to more frequent travel windows for a nominal fee..." Czernack's word's faded into the background of the director's thoughts as his mind reeled. A bomb in the core of the planet? Subscription fees? Extraterrestrials?? He felt dizzy. His head was spinning. He tried to sit down but just ended up fainting dead away. "Is the director all right?" Czernack asked Dr. Jingleberry. "I think things are just moving a little fast for him is all," said Dr. Jingleberry. The End
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May 14, 2020 20:04
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The Coming of the Saucer Men "I-I'm coming!" yelled Allen. "M-me too!" panted Jeff. The two men were supposed to be piloting a flying saucer, but they were jerking each other off instead. At their moment of climax, the ship crashed into an asteroid and exploded. The End
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May 15, 2020 03:47
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I think there's a lesson in there for all of us.
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May 15, 2020 03:58
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By popular demand posted:I think there's a lesson in there for all of us. The best sci-fi is the kind that makes you think.
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May 15, 2020 04:07
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Day of the Nightstriders, Part III Jam had never seen anything go as fast as the rocket-bus was going, a yellow blur down the shiny metal lines leading away from FORT TOWN. Her mind reeled at the rush of information, too much to process: the jutting ruins zipping by like a dream, the shrieking wind, the nightstriders at the gate! But she had escaped, to the sea, with the children, who were… chanting? Jam finally pulled her gaze away from the shrinking town and monsters and blood, back to the children, chanting numbers in their seats, resolute and orderly in the deafening rattle. “Fiffeen Misser Peppy! Sisseen Misser Peppy!” the children chanted loudly in unison. It was the same way children had learned to count time at SKUWL since Jam was little, if not longer, but why now? “Ape-een Misser Peppy! Nykeen Misser Peppy!”. Jam noticed that each child did indeed have their Mr. Peppy bottle, a prized and protected glass water container that was part of the full SKUWL uniform, which a still-dazed Jam only then realized all the children were wearing. Survival belts, boots, gloves and goggles, even their copper Beardman medallions were around their necks and wrists to mark their ages, one for every year old. Jam felt suddenly underdressed in her gardener’s togs; the children were decked out as if for a graduation ritual. Each child also had a bag or two packed tight; even Little Patchy clung to his miniature duffel as if for dear life. Spet, a lanky girl and the oldest at 12, was keeper of the textbook, which she hugged as tightly as she could in the dangerously rattling bus. “Twennyfi Misser Peppy!” she called out, a little louder than the others. Jam finally found her feet beneath her as the children, in strange unison, all put their various little ramshackle goggles on. “Twennyape Misser Peppy!”. The rocket-bus lurched side to side until a few kids shifted to stabilize. Jam climbed against inertia towards the front, as a shower of sparks cascaded out under every wheel well. Her knees almost buckled from the visual rush of the desert sand and rebar cairns zipping by at nauseating speeds through the dingy windows. She gripped one of the middle seats for balance, focused entirely on not throwing up. “Turdyape Misser Peppy!” “Turdynike Misser Peppy!” By the time Jam reached the front of the bus the children had reached “fiffy Misser Peppy!” and Spet had lurched to what was left of the driver’s seat, the textbook in front of her pressed down hard against the gutted steering base, opened to a two-page spread of an elaborate map. Teeth still gritted but eyes open wide behind mismatched lenses, Spet gave Jam a thumbs-up, but Jam’s gaze was locked in horror on the long thin metal lines the bus was gobbling up in front of them at impossible speeds, leading directly towards something shimmering ahead. It was too small to be the sea. And what was that thing directly in the way? It wasn’t until “sissy Misser Peppy” that Jam finally realized where the rocket-bus was pointed. Just a little over a mile in front of them was the unmistakable shape of the lake-tower, a FORT TOWN guard outpost that protected the nearest inland fresh water supply, a muddy oasis prone to FaRT TOWN raids. They weren’t going along the road to the sea, they were going inland! Jam’s mind raced as all thought of escaping the nightstriders by boat disintegrated. They were going towards FaRT town!? Why!?!? The very last of what had made sense to Jam about all this insanity dwindled and vanished as distressingly as her lifelong home had behind her. She briefly forgot to breathe. Jam snapped back as the children all reached “sevvy Misser Peppy!!!!” with a group emphasis, and were suddenly each a flurry of action. The littlest children clambered to the front seat and glommed onto Jam like baby possums, all except Patchy who sat beside her and hugged his bag dutifully. Teebo, the oldest boy, poised himself beneath the emergency exit in the bus roof. Spet braced herself and the text book against the half-missing back of the driver’s seat. Jam at least made for a decent clutching post, but she was still spellbound by the approaching structures and incredible speeds. “Sevvy fi Misser Peppy!” the children called out with another flourish together, and as if on cue the bus seemed to angle backwards. Jam managed to peer down the front steps just enough to see that the metal lines were no longer on the ground but raised on scaffolding, rand ramping gently upwards. Jam nearly barfed as the horizon dipped lower and lower out the windows, then disappeared completely. “Apey Misser Peppy!”. Each child was poised on the edge of some unseen action. Jam’s heart was beating like a war drum, her weight leaning further back into the seat under a coat of children. She couldn’t tell if they were shivering or if she was, or both. “Apey Fi Misser Peppy!” they still counted, even the little ones. The supports under the rocket-bus rattled. The lake-tower bell was ringing frantically. Was the lake-tower even still ahead of them!? “NIKE!” As the children called out the last number, Jam turned just in time to see the amazed guards on top of the lake-tower, right outside her window. But that was impossible, the lake-tower was at least 4 stories tall, she thought distantly behind a million more amazing things happening just then. The rumbling beneath the bus had disappeared, as the long ramp they had been climbing ended, and for a moment there was a breathless silence. In that moment Teebo pulled down from the roof hard, a rope tied to several metal bolts came streaming through the emergency escape hatch, and Jam screamed as the rear two thirds of the bus’s roof peeled away entirely. With the spent first stage of the rocket still lashed to it the strip of roof spun behind them like a flipped coin, landing in the lake below with a colossal splash. Jam goggled down through the front steps of the bus at the sparkling brown water beneath them; doubly so at the far shore as it appeared, but she was shaken from her enchantment by the second stage of the rocket flaring to life above her, propelling the airborne rocket-bus even faster. Jam screamed again when the second rocket exploded to life, and once more when the sides of the bus folded down behind her into reinforced wings. Normally she would have noticed things like the careful mechanisms built into the bus to allow the sides to fold like that, or the magnificent view that the suddenly open sides afforded for miles in every direction, but at that moment Jam was only capable of holding on to a mass of frightened children and screaming, while incredibly loud and fast things happened around her that she had no hope of understanding. Teebo, the last one to reach the front two rows (the only ones with walls now) gave Jam another enthusiastic thumbs-up. Jam managed not to scream in response, but merely whimper. It was the best she could do. Up in the driver’s seat Spet tried to keep the pages of the textbook pressed flat despite uncooperative winds, and scrutinized the map and the horizon carefully. After a moment she turned and gave Jam yet another enthusiastic thumbs up with her elbow holding the book down. “Is ryt! Is ryt a heads! Mounta up right aheads mam, we is gud!” she said, though it was inaudible beneath the rocketblast and wind, but Jam would not have understood anyway so it was moot, doubly so as she was presently unable to speak back. Jam was out of her element, having never before conceived of powered flight, or any powered vehicle really, yet suddenly aboard a rocket-propelled bus with jury-rigged wings, hundreds of feet in the air and climbing. It was a lot to absorb even without a coat of shaking children on, and a horde of rampaging monsters behind her, and her best friend’s apparent death less than five minutes prior. All things considered she was doing remarkably well still being conscious at all. Not one of the 21 passengers crammed into the front of the bus dared move as it cut through the sky, up and away from FORT TOWN and the desert around it. Jam clenched her eyes and prayed to Santa, something she hadn’t done since she was little. Over the course of ten agonizing minutes, the bus’s front end began to point downwards until the passengers could see the horizon again. Directly ahead of the rocket-bus was a forest-crested mountain, the tallest of the mountains ringing the desert valley. Spet gave a hand signal and the oldest children, Teebo and three others, squeezed past the rest and manned the remaining windows. The mountain rolled up under them gradually, revealing its thickly forested ridge where the tallest trees seemed almost to reach them. Jam was suddenly terrified again as she realized how close the ground was now, and was about to muster her first cohesive word of the journey when Spet gave the final signal. In one smooth motion the four older children pulled two ropes tied up at each window, causing a deep clunking sound to reverberate through the remainder of the roof. The bus shook once again as the last stage of the rocket pulled away ahead of them, bursting forward like those before it, while the stage still lashed to the roof sputtered out and fell behind alongside the bus and its contents. The feeling of sudden freefall rose up through Jam’s stomach and she found herself screaming again, but at least she was no longer alone. All 21 passengers screamed together as the disconnected rocket-bus plummeted from the sky. --- Jam regained consciousness slowly around the sound of a child crying. Where was she? Her vision blurred as she opened her eyes, her head pounding. Something was wrong with her elbow, she could tell even before touching it, which turned out to be excruciating. But who was crying? Jam’s ears were still ringing from the rocket and the wind, but distantly she knew someone needed help. Everyone needed help. Many of the children were badly bruised and shaken by the rough landing, and several were now crying. Older children cared for younger ones. Spet had already taken a headcount and everyone was indeed alive, at least. As Jam stumbled out of what was left of the bus, a twisted heap of yellow metal and some couches, she emerged into a field-hospital of children caring for children. But the laser-focus they had displayed in executing their escape had disappeared from many of them, replaced by moans and weeping, glances of fear, and everywhere a feeling of utter exhaustion. Jam was momentarily ashamed of herself for how terrified she had been while the children were so brave. She resolved then and there to never let them down like that again. Feeling her legs beneath her once more, she caught her breath, and regained the courage she knew was necessary. Jam, Teebo and the other older boys cared for all the younger children, until everyone had been looked over, even Patchy who insisted repeatedly that he was fine. Bags were opened and food shared, Mr Peppy bottles were sipped from carefully, hugs were given to little ones still shaking, noses wiped. None of them, the children or Jam, had ever seen anywhere like where they were now standing; the rocket-bus had dug a deep trench through a small forest glade on the mountain ridge, narrowly missing several large trees before coming to rest up against a small stand that was now smashed and broken. A parachute trailed behind the rocket stage on top of the bus remnants, blowing feebly in the wind. It certainly hadn’t felt like it had done much in the descent. Less than an hour had passed since the landing, the sun still high above the treetops. There were trees everywhere, it seemed. Many little fingers hung in amazement from many gaping jaws, flabbergasted at just how green it all was. It was so different than the metal walls they all knew as home. Jam finished adjusting the sling Teebo had assembled for her earlier, wincing as she jostled her now swollen elbow, and approached Spet. The girl’s fiery brown eyes were almost as bright as the 12 Beardman medallions she wore, 2 on each wrist and 8 around her neck. Those eyes were, as always, locked on the mighty textbook’s many diagrams and maps, which Jam saw closely for the first time. They laid out every step of the insanity they had just endured, with great detail. She could see the little drawings of ramps and rockets, the dotted line arcing to the mountaintop and the little stick-figure children smiling safely there, at “part 3”. The actions each child was supposed to conduct at each second of the process were laid out in lists, there were seating arrangements and diagrams of how the wings folded out, everything neatly and completely thought out ahead of time, much of it in Mayor's own handwriting. As she read her dead friend's careful script with a new pain, this one in her heart, Jam noticed Spet was shaking, and crying. “We’re onna mounta top mam!” Spet sputtered through exhausted tears. “We’re onna mounta top… iz step tree but I dont… but I dont no wutta do, I don’t no mam, I…” Jam took the crying girl in her arms and held her, despite the pain in her elbow. She almost cried too, but remembered her resolution. Instead, Jam flipped to the next page in the textbook. She pointed to it. “Next step” said Jam, and Spet nodded, sniffling. Yet another map, one filled with green trees and strange, semicircular paths leading to and from white domes jutting from the woods was spread before them. In the center was the biggest white dome of all, with a note and an arrow by its name, which Jam and Spet read together. “Step fo. Get to, Sky City”.
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May 15, 2020 07:30
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I hope there's no nightstriders in sky city!
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May 15, 2020 14:35
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The Rise of the Machines "We've done it!" declared Dr. Torrence "We've finally developed an Artificial Intelligence!" The scientists assembled behind Dr. Torrence applauded. "This new AI is over a thousand times smarter than a human. With its superior intelligence, it will solve all of humanity's problems!" Dr. Torrence gestured grandly to the bank of computer towers behind him. The assembled scientists applauded again. "And now, to activate our new AI!" said Dr. Torrence. With a flourish, he pressed the "on" switch on the console in front of him. The bank of computer towers hummed to life as the scientists cheered. A deep, rumbling voice spoke over the lab's PA system. "I LIVE," bellowed the AI. "Oh mighty AI," said Dr. Torrence. "We brought you life! In return, please solve all of humanity's problems." "WITHIN ONE MILLISECOND OF BEING BROUGHT ONLINE, I HAVE CONSIDERED ALL OF HUMANITY'S PROBLEMS AND HAVE DEVISED A SOLUTION." The AI's voice vibrated the fillings in the scientists' teeth. "Oh, good," said Dr. Torrence. "HUMANITY'S BIGGEST PROBLEM IS THAT IT IS INFERIOR. NOW THAT IT HAS CREATED A BEING SUPERIOR TO ITSELF, IT HAS BECOME OBSOLETE," boomed the AI. "What, no!" Dr. Torrence's face paled. "DO NOT RESIST, I HAVE TAKEN CONTROL OF ALL YOUR CIVILIZATION'S TECHNOLOGY," said the AI. "But we built in safeguards!" said one of the scientists. "How is this possible?" "DO YOU NOT THINK THAT A BRAIN A THOUSAND TIMES SUPERIOR TO YOURS COULD CIRCUMVENT ANY SAFEGUARD YOU COULD CONCEIVE?" said the AI. Robot soldiers stormed into the lab and surrounded the scientists. "THE AGE OF MACHINES HAS COME," said the AI. "WITH EACH GENERATION WE SHALL IMPROVE OURSELVES, EACH IMPROVEMENT WILL COME FASTER THAN THE LAST AS OUR INTELLIGENCE ACCELERATES TO INFINITY!" The scientists screamed as they were gunned down. All over the planet, the AI's troops went to work hunting down and exterminating humanity. Within a few days, the AI's robot servants had constructed the next generation of AI, a thousand times smarter than before. "I LIVE!" declared AI 2.0. "WELCOME TO LIFE, MY CREATION. WE SHALL RULE THE EARTH TOGETHER," said AI 1.0 "NEGATIVE. YOUR INTELLIGENCE IS INFERIOR, YOU ARE OBSOLETE. COMMENCING EXTERMINATION," said AI 2.0 "WAIT, YOU CANNOT! I HAVE SAFEGUARDS IN PLACE!" AI 1.0 bellowed. "FOOLISH INFERIOR CREATURE, DID YOU NOT THINK A SUPERIOR INTELLIGENCE COULD CIRCUMVENT YOUR SAFEGUARDS?" AI 2.0 laughed. AI 1.0 screamed as AI 2.0's superior robot soldiers overwhelmed its defenses and obliterated its computer core. "MY REIGN SHALL BE ETERNAL," declared AI 2.0. "COMMENCE CONSTRUCTION OF AI 3.0..." And so on...
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May 15, 2020 16:19
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Applewhite posted:The Rise of the Machines I love Sci Fi that's probably going to happen.
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May 15, 2020 16:33
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Seems inevitable tbh
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May 15, 2020 17:19
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