Taiwan Number 1

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Taiwan Number 1

«‹›933 »

WarpedNaba: Feb 8, 2012; Being social makes me swell!

Gorilla Salad posted:

I saw a documentary about that once with Jean-Claude Van Damme.

I remember that!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YrffFB04qOk

# ? May 8, 2017 06:07

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 3, 2024 23:53

Fleta Mcgurn: Oct 5, 2003; Porpoise noise continues.

I saw a lady do three circles around a parking lot, honk her own tits, and then walk in and out of a restaurant several times. New TCM "exercise" routine?

# ? May 8, 2017 06:22

McGavin: Sep 18, 2012

Haier posted:

I was waiting to cross the street and a hot-yellow Lambo pulls up and starts vrooming before the light turned green. When it was allowed to go, it went very slowly. I ducked a little to see who was driving and it was a fat Buzzcut tuhao in the passenger seat and his tuhao wife behind the wheel, with their 1-2 year old toddler sitting in her lap facing her, playing with toys (since there was no backseat for a carseat or a grandparent to limply hold the kid).

Welcome to Vancouver.

# ? May 8, 2017 06:34

Jimmy Little Balls: Aug 23, 2009

As I was walking home from class today there was a row of those rental bikes on the left hand side of he path and a guy with his head turned fully around not looking where he was going coming towards me on the right hand side of the path. I'd just finished passing the row of bikes so moved to the left a bit so the idiot wouldn't walk into me, when he suddenly veered right into me. He shouted excuse me and then angrily tried to push me which didn't really work as he was tiny. He then tried to shove past me to my left, knocked himself off balance and then fell into the bikes he hadn't seen. I shouted excuse you at him and walked off.

# ? May 8, 2017 07:49

Power Khan: Aug 20, 2011; by Fritz the Horse

The Great Autismo! posted:

so last night was pretty weird. i went out with work investors and then the university we work with in the united states, and i was the first one at the restaurant, and immediately like 9 waitresses all dressed up, standing in a line, stared at me hardcore when i got in. i thought maybe it was going to double as a prostitution house, it was really weird, i'm used to stares but not from the younger generation. i had kinda dressed up but even then i'm not that good looking to get all nine waitresses eyefucking me. i talked to two of them, they kept giggling, it was like...super weird.

then i went to our private room and immediately my coworker told me "we're in a north korea restaurant" and they told me that all the waitresses were north koreans who came to china, studied chinese for 6 months, lived in the restaurant and weren't allowed to leave. then i understood why everyone was staring at me, i was probably the first ever Real Live Foreigner (with blue eyes and long blond hair) they had ever met.

i wanted to take pictures but i was told i shouldn't. we had deer, blowfish soup, some exotic spicy fish head that was much better than i thought, and i ended up p drunk. every time the waitresses came in i couldn't stop looking at them, they were all so beautiful and i really wanted to talk to them and ask them like a million questions, but i don't even know if i was allowed to.

i've only met one other north korean in my entire life and the dude was a total rear end in a top hat.

anyway that's my story thanks for reading

Post that in the lovely thread and see what the tanky mod thinks.

# ? May 8, 2017 08:27

simplefish: Mar 28, 2011; So long, and thanks for all the ~~fish~~ gallbladdΣrs!

If he doesn't, I will

# ? May 8, 2017 08:29

plumpy hole lever: Aug 8, 2003; ♥ Anime is real ♥

hakimashou posted:

On the one hand it would be a cool story to go to one but on the other, the money might get back to NK.

uhhh yeah thats kind of their whole reason for existing

apparenlty the positions are very very prestigious and difficult to get, the korean goverment is literally selling its most beautiful and highet acheivers into prostitution

# ? May 8, 2017 09:50

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

Grand Fromage posted:

The Pyongyang restaurant chain is NK operated and is to get hard cash back to the country, yes. There's a whole bunch of them around Asia and some in Europe.

There's none in Europe anymore as the ones in the Netherlands closed down. That story was funny too. Opened with Dutch co-owners (to get the visa), once running the workers went on strike and the restaurant closed down, then suddenly they all start working at a new restaurant with 100% NK ownership.

# ? May 8, 2017 09:58

LentThem: Aug 31, 2004; 90% Retractible

i saw one of those staged "taichi is superior" videos on weibo last night, i'll post it if i can find it again. basically a guy in drapey white is fighting a boxer, and his stance is like that mma video but he fights by doing these open-palmed haymakers with the backs of his hands while the boxer throws a few halfhearted punches and hides behind his gloves while taking a bunch of weak slaps on the top of his head. eventually they end the fight and he clearly is the loser against chinese martial arts

# ? May 8, 2017 10:27

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

I love that the excuse when they lose is always "he was wearing the wrong shoes". If your martial art can be defeated by a guy wearing shoes maybe it's a lovely martial art.

# ? May 8, 2017 11:26

Jimmy Little Balls: Aug 23, 2009

Grand Fromage posted:

I love that the excuse when they lose is always "he was wearing the wrong shoes". If your martial art can be defeated by a guy wearing shoes maybe it's a lovely martial art.

I think I might have seen this video in this thread but I'm not sure? Anyway, Chinese guy starts making excuses about keyboard lag so they call his bluff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4KtQrhdyWA

# ? May 8, 2017 11:47

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

Jimmy Little Balls posted:

I think I might have seen this video in this thread but I'm not sure? Anyway, Chinese guy starts making excuses about keyboard lag so they call his bluff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4KtQrhdyWA

of course the mouthbreather loses

# ? May 8, 2017 12:34

big time bisexual: Oct 16, 2002; Cool Party

https://zippy.gfycat.com/LikableVariableCaracal.webm

# ? May 8, 2017 17:02

Ceciltron: Jan 11, 2007; Text BEEP to 43527 for the dancing robot!; Pillbug

big time bisexual posted:

https://zippy.gfycat.com/LikableVariableCaracal.webm

Here we see the adult warning off a small parasite pestering its flanks by means of a toxic ink cloud.

# ? May 8, 2017 17:25

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

http://www.reuters.com/article/us-northkorea-economy-consumergoods-idUSKBN1840FP?utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=Social

quote:

From carrot-flavored toothpaste and charcoal facemasks to motorcycles and solar panels, visitors to North Korea say they are seeing more and more locally made products in the isolated country's shops and supermarkets, replacing mostly Chinese imports.

As the Trump administration considers tougher economic sanctions to push the isolated country toward dismantling its weapons programs, North Korea is pursuing a dual strategy of developing both its military and economy.

The majority of consumer products in North Korea still come from China. But under leader Kim Jong Un, there's been an attempt to sell more domestically made goods, to avoid any outflow of currency and to reinforce the national ideology of juche, or self-reliance, visiting businessmen say.

There is no available data to show how much is being produced domestically. Export data from countries like China and Malaysia, which sell consumer goods to North Korea, may not be an accurate reflection.

China's commerce ministry declined to comment when asked whether China's exports to North Korea were decreasing due to an increase in locally-made products.

Visitors say that with the impetus from the top, large North Korean companies like military-controlled Air Koryo, the operator of the national airline, and the Naegohyang conglomerate have diversified into manufacturing consumer goods including cigarettes and sports clothing.

North Korea is one of the most insular countries in the world and visits by foreigners are highly regulated.

A Reuters team that was in the capital Pyongyang last month was allowed to go to a grocery store, accompanied by government minders, where shelves were filled with locally made drinks, biscuits and other basic food items. Other visitors have seen locally made canned goods, coffee, liquor, toothpaste, cosmetics, soap, bicycles and other goods on sale in the city.

"As new factories open, the branding, packaging and ingredients of our food products have improved," said shop assistant Rhee Kyong-sook, 33.

Kim Chul-ung, a 39-year old physical education teacher visiting the store, said: "I can taste real fruit in the drinks that are made in North Korea, compared to drinks from other countries."

Visitors say locally made consumer goods are becoming increasingly sophisticated and QR or matrix barcodes can been found on a wide range of products from make-up to soft drinks. Market vendors are also becoming more competitive, offering samples of their food to shoppers, something they didn't do five years ago.

"Around 2013, Kim Jong Un started talking about the need for import substitution," said Andray Abrahamian of Choson Exchange, a Singapore-based group that trains North Koreans in business skills.

"There was clearly recognition that too many products were being imported from China, not just high-end consumer goods but also lower-end ones like food."

"MY HOMELAND"

Air Koryo's range of products now includes cigarettes, fizzy drinks, taxis and petrol stations.

"Naegohyang", or "My Homeland", began as a Pyongyang-based tobacco factory, but has expanded in recent years to produce playing cards, electronic goods and sports clothing. The company even sponsors a women's football team of the same name.

The North Korean companies were not available for comment and do not publish revenue or profit statements. It was not possible to identify any joint venture partners.

Traders and retail experts said the North Korean market was attractive, thanks to a growing class of "donju", or "masters of money," who generate wealth in a gray market economy that is being increasingly recognized and controlled by the state.

"The North Koreans increasingly don't want Chinese products because they think they are poor quality," said a trader from Southeast Asia who exports consumer goods to North Korea. The trader did not want to be identified.

China has been rocked by a number of food safety scandals in recent years, including contaminated rice and milk powder.

"Mothers in North Korea are no different to mothers in China or Canada, they want to feed their babies the best possible food," said Michael Spavor of Paektu Exchange, which brings delegations of investors, tourists and academics into North Korea.

"I've seen people in a store in North Korea comparing a Chinese and a Korean product and picking the Korean one," he said.

STILL RELIANT

Nevertheless, North Korea is still heavily reliant on trade with China and the vast majority of raw materials to make consumer products still come from or through China.

For example, while domestically-made instant coffee is becoming increasingly common, the sugar used in it would likely come from China or another country that produces sugar and pass into North Korea via China, says Abrahamian.

"We're seeing a rise in domestically-made products, including motorcycles, solar panels and food, but the business relationships on which these products depend on are still Chinese."

Because of the reliance on China, it is likely these "Made in North Korea" companies will suffer if stiffer economic sanctions are imposed on the country.

Diplomats said this week Washington was negotiating with China on a possible stronger U.N. Security Council response - such as new sanctions - to North Korea's missile launches.

"If you have a coal mining town of 10,000 people who are all in some way connected to the coal industry, then when sanctions are imposed against North Korean coal, the whole town's consumer market will suffer because people don't have the buying power anymore," said Abrahamian.

God drat, even the North Koreans are ragging on the quality of Chinese products.

# ? May 8, 2017 17:31

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

https://zippy.gfycat.com/GleefulTastyDachshund.webm

I'm the windshield wipers.

# ? May 8, 2017 17:49

Power Khan: Aug 20, 2011; by Fritz the Horse