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sweeperbravo
May 18, 2012

AUNT GWEN'S COLD SHAPE (!)
a friend's birthday we went to a biergarten which sold German style food. I wanted a nice dipping pretzel (their advertised claim to faim). They were out of the good sized ones. I ordered two slightly smaller ones and they were hard and bad. From now on if I'm ever yearning for a nice dipping pretzel I will just get those ones you heat in the microwave for 30 sec and make myself some rarebit sauce. gently caress all preps.

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Schubalts
Nov 26, 2007

People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Lutha Mahtin posted:

:wrong:

yes i'm sure you have an exhaustive catalog from the earliest years of american state fairs

Pharaoh deep fried some crazy poo poo, man.

angerbot
Mar 23, 2004

plob
We've got quite a good German place in my city. I guess I can't compare as I've never been to Germany but by all accounts it's quite authentic and they have a really good patio.

http://www.amadeuscafe.ca/authentic-german-and-austrian-cuisine/

Plus they do a thing they call "Food by the meter" which is great for crowds, just a huge pile of potatoes, and saurkraut and ripchen, sausages, schnitzel etc.

McSpergin
Sep 10, 2013

We have a German beer cafe in Brisbane that does a fuckin sick pork knuckle. Just sayin

Slate Slabrock
Sep 12, 2009
Grimey Drawer


Swear there's not a speck of spice on that.

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

Slate Slabrock posted:



Swear there's not a speck of spice on that.

She wants to be a AMERICAN WIFE (:btroll:), NOT SOME DIRTY SPICE-RIDDEN, EXOTICALLY FLAVORED FURRINER WHORE (:shlick:)!

Samizdata has a new favorite as of 05:10 on Aug 11, 2017

Altared State
Jan 14, 2006

I think I was born to burn
That chicken looks like a pale mussel

MariusLecter
Sep 5, 2009

NI MUERTE NI MIEDO
Boiled water is a seasoning to people. I don't understand it and I don't want to.

The Glumslinger
Sep 24, 2008

Coach Nagy, you want me to throw to WHAT side of the field?


Hair Elf

Picnic Princess posted:

Did they think slow cooker meant oven?

Even ignoring that, literally 0 of those things would do well in a real slow cooker

Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender

Slate Slabrock posted:



Swear there's not a speck of spice on that.
I propose a sister category to "why is it wet? :gonk:": "Why is it so dry? :geno:"

bloom
Feb 25, 2017

by sebmojo

Slate Slabrock posted:



Swear there's not a speck of spice on that.

This is giving me some serious flashbacks to my parents' cooking. I'm pretty sure my love of spicy food comes from rebelling against years of eating plain potatoes/rice with unspiced dry meat.

Plinkey
Aug 4, 2004

by Fluffdaddy

Slate Slabrock posted:



Swear there's not a speck of spice on that.

nice looking fish

Sakurazuka
Jan 24, 2004

NANI?

Slate Slabrock posted:



Swear there's not a speck of spice on that.

my_mums_cooking.jpg

Except there's no watery tasteless 'gravy' on that

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

It doesn't get blander than that.

elise the great
May 1, 2012

You do not have to be good. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.
My coworkers are always going on "meal prep" benders and bringing in these vile tupperware lunches made of:

1 green thing (broccoli, kale, green beans)
1 chopped bell pepper
1 "healthy grain" (brown rice, quinoa)
1 chicken breast, unseasoned, drier than all the vaginas at a Ted Cruz rally combined

No onions. No herbs. No spices. Maybe some black pepper, maybe not. They eat this poo poo on purpose, day after day, and I cannot for the loving life of me understand why. Some of them are Filipinas! They should know better!

On the other end of the spectrum is my coworker Abeba, who brings in this beef marrow wat with injera-- a rich, gum-blistering berbere curry with lentils, fatty beef marrow, and chopped okra, served with a sourdough crepe for scooping. It's the grossest-looking food I've ever seen in person and I would eat it out of a bedpan if that was the only way to get it in my mouth.

Ethiopian food is AFP prime but so delicious it can look like this and still make me hungry:

My Lovely Horse
Aug 21, 2010

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

From Bauhaus in Vancouver (which is actually owned by Uwe Bol, go figure).


No traditional German would touch such a fancy hippie food as quinoa.

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

elise the great posted:

My coworkers are always going on "meal prep" benders and bringing in these vile tupperware lunches made of:

1 green thing (broccoli, kale, green beans)
1 chopped bell pepper
1 "healthy grain" (brown rice, quinoa)
1 chicken breast, unseasoned, drier than all the vaginas at a Ted Cruz rally combined

No onions. No herbs. No spices. Maybe some black pepper, maybe not. They eat this poo poo on purpose, day after day, and I cannot for the loving life of me understand why. Some of them are Filipinas! They should know better!

On the other end of the spectrum is my coworker Abeba, who brings in this beef marrow wat with injera-- a rich, gum-blistering berbere curry with lentils, fatty beef marrow, and chopped okra, served with a sourdough crepe for scooping. It's the grossest-looking food I've ever seen in person and I would eat it out of a bedpan if that was the only way to get it in my mouth.

Ethiopian food is AFP prime but so delicious it can look like this and still make me hungry:



Don't care WHAT it looks like. Have had Ethopian. You would prolly need a jumbo Haldol to get me off that plate.

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


Ethiopian food is incredible and sometimes I'm glad I've never lived in a city that had an Ethiopian restaurant because I'd be 500 pounds by the end of the year.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.
Can we stop yelling "American" as a pejorative? Thanks.

Grand Fromage posted:

Ethiopian food is incredible and sometimes I'm glad I've never lived in a city that had an Ethiopian restaurant because I'd be 500 pounds by the end of the year.

I want to take you to this one I used to haunt in Oakland. They had an all-you-can-eat lunch buffet and I want to see what happens in that situation.


e: I should admit to the thread that I fully made a Swineapple last night and it was loving great. No pics, unfortunately.

Fleta Mcgurn has a new favorite as of 10:35 on Aug 11, 2017

Data Graham
Dec 28, 2009

📈📊🍪😋



Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Can we stop yelling "American" as a pejorative? Thanks.


I want to take you to this one I used to haunt in Oakland. They had an all-you-can-eat lunch buffet and I want to see what happens in that situation.


e: I should admit to the thread that I fully made a Swineapple last night and it was loving great. No pics, unfortunately.

Blue Nile, right?

Megabound
Oct 20, 2012

McSpergin posted:

We have a German beer cafe in Brisbane that does a fuckin sick pork knuckle. Just sayin

The German Club is fucken sick too and worth the $5 membership.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.

Data Graham posted:

Blue Nile, right?

I don't remember off the top of my head, but that sounds familiar!

axolotl farmer
May 17, 2007

Now I'm going to sing the Perry Mason theme

Authentic photo of Richard Nixon's last lunch at the White House, August 8, 1974.



Cottage cheese, pineapple rings, and a glass of milk :smith:

Philippe
Aug 9, 2013

(she/her)
Not even a sprig of mint or a sprinkle of chiffonade basil. Shameful.

McSpergin
Sep 10, 2013

Megabound posted:

The German Club is fucken sick too and worth the $5 membership.

Noice mate I'll have to have a look at that

NinjaDebugger
Apr 22, 2008


bloom posted:

This is giving me some serious flashbacks to my parents' cooking. I'm pretty sure my love of spicy food comes from rebelling against years of eating plain potatoes/rice with unspiced dry meat.

Quotes like this make me grateful my mom was a chef. She was lazy as poo poo at home, but even with all the shortcuts, at least the food tasted good and used actual spices.

axolotl farmer
May 17, 2007

Now I'm going to sing the Perry Mason theme

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

Not even a sprig of mint or a sprinkle of chiffonade basil. Shameful.

Fresh basil wasn't invented until 1995.

Bubblyblubber
Nov 17, 2014

NinjaDebugger posted:

Quotes like this make me grateful my mom was a chef. She was lazy as poo poo at home, but even with all the shortcuts, at least the food tasted good and used actual spices.

Wait, hold on.

Spices? Plural?

Is... is there like a second type of ranch nobody told me about?

bloom
Feb 25, 2017

by sebmojo

Bubblyblubber posted:

Wait, hold on.

Spices? Plural?

Is... is there like a second type of ranch nobody told me about?

He may be referring to the... forbidden spices :ohdear:

*A shaker of black pepper is revealed, old white people's faces melt ala Raiders of the Lost Ark*

Spuckuk
Aug 11, 2009

Being a bastard works



.Z. posted:


At this point, social media just makes good cooking look more prevalent. Home cooking in the USA has been on the decline for years now. Something like 75% of households cooked in those years, its down to 60% or less now.

What do the other 40% live on?

Julias
Jun 24, 2012

Strum in a harmonizing quartet
I want to cause a revolution

What can I do? My savage
nature is beyond wild
Prepackaged foods and take-out.

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

axolotl farmer posted:

Authentic photo of Richard Nixon's last lunch at the White House, August 8, 1974.



Cottage cheese, pineapple rings, and a glass of milk :smith:

I'd rather eat that than well done steak with ketchup TBH.

Spuckuk
Aug 11, 2009

Being a bastard works



Julias posted:

Prepackaged foods and take-out.

:smith:

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

axolotl farmer posted:

Authentic photo of Richard Nixon's last lunch at the White House, August 8, 1974.



Cottage cheese, pineapple rings, and a glass of milk :smith:

Food Timeline has a page on the foods every president preferred. It's a really good way to humanize them and get a sense of their personalities.

Like when James Garfield was having difficulties after being shot:

quote:

“Most days, Garfield was able to keep down a little bit of oatmeal. Unfortunately, that happened to be the one food he despised. Although Garfield found it difficult to eat anything, for a while at least he seemed to relish drinking a glass of milk. He dutifully swallowed the koumiss, a drink made from fermented horse milk, that [Dr.] Bliss gave him nearly every day, but he strongly preferred cow’s milk. Eager to help in any way, Americans latched onto this small piece of information. So that the president might have the freshest possible milk, a company in Baltimore sent him an Alderny cow, which could be seen tied up on the White House lawn. The White House cook, who was the only Catholic among the staff, poured a large glass of milk for Garfield every day. Just before she carried his tray up the winding servant stairs to his sickroom, she quietly sprinkled holy water into his glass.”

Or the reason Taft was so fat:

quote:

"Steak spelled with a big 'S' was the favorite food of William Howard Taft. When the Chief Justice started to eat stea, it did not matter much to him what the meal was. As a matter of fact, according to the late Ike Hoover, of the White House staff, when Taft was President there was always steak for his breakfast. Naturally, Mrs. Taft saw to it that steak appeared every morning for her husband. Toward the end of his life he had to modify his diet and steak became more of a luxury. Generally Mrs. Taft would order some form of potaotes to go with the steak. The former President was fond of hashed brown potatoes, if his diet did not interfere. The steak was always broiled in this method:

Broiled Steak
Select a T-Bone, tenderloin or sirloin. Wipe the meat dry, remove the outside skin and some of the fat if there is a large quantity of it. Then, with some of the removed fat, grease the broiler. Place the steak on the broiler over a clear fire or under the gas flame; sear quickly on both sides to prevent the juices escaping. Turn again and cook on both sides until done, 10 to 15 minutes for a medium thick steak if deseried rare; allow a few minutes longer if steak is preferered well done. RRemove to hot platter, sprinkle with salt and pepper and stpread with soft butter."
---"Favorite Foods of Famous Folk," Pattie Ellicott, Washington Post, October 31, 1935 (p. 12)

Or statements that end up becoming very darkly humorous a few years later:

quote:

"[Nixon] likes ketchup on his cottage cheese but his favorite food is meat loaf...His breakfast is served by Fina Sanchez, wife of Manolo, both Castillians who came to New York via Cuba and live in the servants' quarters of the Nixon apartment. Nixon's breakfast fare is always the same: Fresh orange juice, half a grapefruit, cold cereal and skim milk and coffee. Sometimes Mrs. Nixon...joins him for coffee...The President-elect's working suite at the Pierre consists of a large drawing room, a bedroom, dressing room, bath, office study and entrance foyer. The first thing Nixon does after depositing his coat in the closet is ring for a cup of coffee--his second of the morning. He is not a chronic coffee drinker, a staff aide explained, but he does offer coffee to his visitors throughout the day and he, of course, drinks a cup with them. As he drinks his first cup at the office, he goes over the things on his desk...He is never without a tape recorder within reach on which to record his thoughts and ideas on whatever subject pops into his mind or comes up in a conversation...'The ideas he dictates into the machines and the memos are fantastic,' says Rose Mary Woods, his long-time, loyal secretary...Nixon...is a weight-watcher but he does it unconsciously, says Miss Woods. His watching is most evident at lunch when he eats at when he eats at his desk. He has cottage cheese and fruit--it varies from day to day--peaches, pears or oranges--from the hotel's kitchen. Occasionally he deviates and has a hamburger and a cup of coffee. Once a week, he goes out for luncheon, usually with a long time personal friend and perhaps one or both of his daughters. A favorite place for these occasions is the chic La Cote Basque Restaurant...Occaionally he works at his office right through dinner. When he does, Manolo fixes him a late dinner at home from that Fina has left in the refrigerator or on the stove. More often, he leaves the Pierre at 6:30 p.m. and enjoys the less-than-five-minute walk in the evening air to his apartment. Once there, he turns on the stereo and keeps music of all types--particularly show tunes he especialy likes--playing until he retires hours later. Sometimes he goes to the den and mixes himself a drink, his first of the day. 'He drinks very infrequently,' a staff aide said...Nixon is ready for dinner by 7 p.m. and the famly dines by candlelight in the large formal dining room with soft music in the background. The menu is totaly unimportant to the President-elect. 'Dick eats everything but he likes meat loaf,' Mrs. Nixon said. Her meat loaf recipe calls for half beef and half pork. 'I have never seen him turn anything down. If he is particuarly pleased with what he has, he'll call Fina and Manolo in to tell them how good it is.'"
---"How Nixon Lives, What He Likes," Marie Smith Washington Post, January 17, 1969 (p. B1)

CannonFodder
Jan 26, 2001

Passion’s Wrench

chitoryu12 posted:

Food Timeline has a page on the foods every president preferred. It's a really good way to humanize them and get a sense of their personalities.


Or statements that end up becoming very darkly humorous a few years later:
Erlichmann: "Aunt Gwen's Cold Shape (!)"
Nixon: "Jesus Christ"

Pastry of the Year
Apr 12, 2013

Welcome back to 1987.

uPen
Jan 25, 2010

Zu Rodina!

Pastry of the Year posted:

Welcome back to 1987.



Firstly, shocked at every meal having some form of fruit and veggie.
Second, I want whatever a Taco Pocket is.

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

uPen posted:

Firstly, shocked at every meal having some form of fruit and veggie.
Second, I want whatever a Taco Pocket is.

It's when you put tacos in your pocket

Lutha Mahtin
Oct 10, 2010

Your brokebrain sin is absolved...go and shitpost no more!

it's probably some kind of pastry with ground beef and "taco" seasoning inside. like a hot pocket. but who knows, back then they might have actually made it by hand!

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PubicMice
Feb 14, 2012

looking for information on posts
"Taco Pocket" makes me think of Walking Taco, or Taco in a Bag, where you take a small bag of doritos or something, and dump the meat and cheese and vegatables in and shake it up.

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