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Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss 
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Jul 11, 2011 01:53
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I'm sorry, man. That sucks.
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Jul 11, 2011 02:25
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OK.. I did it.. the birth control is out. I can't believe we're really doing this. Seems like everyone around us is having kids, so I feel a LITTLE better about this. I'm almost 35, and I was starting to feel kind of old, but now something like 75% of all our friends are having babies. It must be catching. I've been taking prenatals for almost 4 months now, so I am sure I am up on whatever I need to be taking. is there anything my husband should be taking to help his little swimmers?
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Jul 11, 2011 02:44
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otter posted:Bad news. I had the shot myself earlier this year. It wasn't ectopic, but my hcg levels just weren't going down and the doctor thought a bit of something was left behind after a very early loss. They told me the shot had less risk associated with it than a D&C, and I had only been a few weeks along. If I remember right, I had a blood test 4 days after the initial shot, and the doctor said that in many cases there is still a bit of increase in hormone levels at that point, but at the next blood test at 7 days after the shot, there should be some sort of drop. I was also told that around 85% of women only need the one shot, but if for some reason a second shot is needed, that takes care of 95% of women. I only needed the one shot, there was a slight drop at the first blood test and a definite drop at the second, and I had a blood test every week afterwards to monitor my levels and make sure everything went smoothly. Depending on how high her hgc levels were, though, it might be a while before she's not testing positive anymore. I'm very sorry for your loss
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Jul 11, 2011 03:00
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otter posted:Bad news. Awww man, I'm so sorry dude. Did the Dr properly inform you of the choice between surgery and the Methotrexate? I've had an ectopic myself, so I know it sucks. I'm sorry
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Jul 11, 2011 10:18
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Cathis posted:OK.. I did it.. the birth control is out. I can't believe we're really doing this. Seems like everyone around us is having kids, so I feel a LITTLE better about this. I'm almost 35, and I was starting to feel kind of old, but now something like 75% of all our friends are having babies. It must be catching. With my limited knowledge of male fertility - I've cut back on booze and caffiene, making sure I eat healthily and am trying to get more exercise. I'm currently doing 3 hours of cardio a week (because I'm a fatass) and am working to increase that to 6-7 hours a week over the next few months. Haven't read about any needed suppliments. But haven't looked either. Edit: Looks like zinc and vitamin C are good for healthy sperms. Mr Darcy fucked around with this message at 12:30 on Jul 11, 2011 |
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Jul 11, 2011 10:46
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dishonesty posted:Awww man, I'm so sorry dude. Oh yeah. The dr. has been very good in this whole thing. There are a million reasons why the shot was a better choice for her, so that's the direction she felt she needed to go. As far as the hcg levels, she never made it past 300 at 6 weeks.
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Jul 11, 2011 15:41
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followup: posting from the hospital. I was in the middle of a client meeting when my wife hits me up over instant messenger saying she needs to go to the ER. So I cancelled the rest of my day and took her in. Her tube was rupturing. Her hcg kept rising. She ended up having to lose a tube. Recovering well, and she's already come to terms with it. The surgeon also did ovarian drilling for free while he was in there since she has pcos and insurance generally doesn't cover it.
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Jul 12, 2011 08:45
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otter posted:followup: posting from the hospital. Aww man I'm sorry it went that way. I had my left tube removed because of my ectopic as well. I tried to look at it somewhat positively compared to the Methotrexate because it meant I didn't have to wait at least 6 months to try and conceive again. It did worry me about future ectopics though - cause I only had one tube left and couldn't risk that one. But since it was healthy it was a slim chance, and I'm now 24 weeks pregnant 
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Jul 13, 2011 05:52
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From several discussions with ob/gyns and my father in law (who is a biochemist) one would only really have to wait 6 months if you were taking regular doses for chrons disease or arthritis or taking chemotherapy level doses. At the level they give you for termination, they recommend waiting one complete ovulation.
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Jul 13, 2011 06:18
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otter posted:From several discussions with ob/gyns and my father in law (who is a biochemist) one would only really have to wait 6 months if you were taking regular doses for chrons disease or arthritis or taking chemotherapy level doses. At the level they give you for termination, they recommend waiting one complete ovulation. Oh really? Everything I'd read/been told said 6 months. Well that's good then. .. I guess? :\
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Jul 15, 2011 11:37
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Background: My maternal cousin is 36, her husband is 42. They have been trying for a baby for years and have had no luck either naturally or with IVF. After five or six failed rounds of IVF, they decided to look into what was going wrong and discovered she has a chromosomal abnormality in her eggs that causes them to be expelled by her body. So I get a call from my mum about a fortnight ago. She has had my cousin on the phone absolutely distraught asking her if she would ask me (and my sister) if either of us would be prepared to donate eggs. She also asked my other aunt to ask my other female cousin. At 26, I am the oldest of all three potential donors and the only one who is likely to say yes. Both my aunts and my mum are post menopausal, so they can't help. So here I am. My gut instinct was to say yes - surely it's no different to donating blood or bone marrow? But there are a huge number of complicating factors that I need to consider. First off, I have epilepsy and asthma, which I know write me off from joining the egg donation register. So I'm off to the doc's on Wednesday to find out if this is going to put the breaks on straight away or not. Assuming there's no pressing medical reason I can't donate, the main other concern is that I haven't got any kids myself, but would like to in the future. This is a two-fold issue: First, is this going to have any effect on my own fertility? Second, there's the psychological issue. While I was really blasé initially, genetically this will be my child. I really don't know how much that fact would affect me in reality - I'm quite a laid back person, so think that my initial reaction would probably remain, but I the question of "what if I suddenly flip my nut and get all 'OMG that's my kid!' or something?" is in the back of my mind. This is potentially one of the hardest decisions of my life, especially as I know that I am probably her last chance. So - has anyone else done egg donation? Or got any advice for me? (also worth mentioning now: I'm British, so there's no payments involved).
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Jul 17, 2011 19:05
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Is there a reason she can't go through the normal egg banks? Is it just a money barrier?
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Jul 18, 2011 19:34
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yawnie posted:Is there a reason she can't go through the normal egg banks? Is it just a money barrier? More likely to work if we're genetically close (she has no siblings).
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Jul 18, 2011 20:16
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So...when you're doing ovulation predictor tests, I recommend avoiding eating a bunch of asparagus for dinner. Holding a cup of asparagus-pee is something I hope to never have to repeat.
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Jul 19, 2011 05:16
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Mnemosyne posted:So...when you're doing ovulation predictor tests, I recommend avoiding eating a bunch of asparagus for dinner. Holding a cup of asparagus-pee is something I hope to never have to repeat.  Asparagus doesn't have that effect on me, but I will bear it in mind just in case!
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Jul 19, 2011 08:36
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schadenfraud posted:More likely to work if we're genetically close (she has no siblings). Ahh, I see. I distantly know a few people who have donated eggs, but nobody who I could call up and ask questions. From what I understand they found it a very positive experience. Personally, I can't deal with the idea of a child that is genetically mine being given away and raised by someone else. It would definitely be easier if it were someone I knew, rather than just donating to an egg bank and having no clue how many of "my" kids were out there, but even so, it's a tough call. I think you just have to go with your gut and not let any feelings of obligation or guilt force you into donating. It would be a wonderful gift if you decide you're truly okay with it, but doing it against your better judgment just because you feel bad won't do anybody any favors in the long run and will just blow up later down the line.
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Jul 19, 2011 21:23
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My period just decided to skip a month. It started this month right on time as if I had a normal one last month. So, here's hoping my husband is home in time next month when I ovulate.
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Jul 25, 2011 09:11
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I'm not sure if this is the right thread to ask, but a friend of mine is attempting to become a gestational carrier. She's done a bunch of googling and just can't find anything to help her out. I've done some too, but it's mainly just guidelines. Is there some sort of registry or something she can join? Should she just talk to her OB/GYN and see where he points her? Does anyone in here have any experience with this, from either end? I'll admit I haven't read this massive thread, but I figured I'd try to help her out. Thanks!
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Jul 27, 2011 00:13
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What country is she in?
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Jul 28, 2011 08:21
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There are agencies she can work with--but most of them won't work with a women who doesn't already have her own children, so if she isn't a mom, she probably needs to table the idea.
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Jul 28, 2011 11:59
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Irregular periods + possible pregnancy means you should pee on a stick when? A missed period isn't exactly a missed period with extreme irregularity.
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Jul 28, 2011 17:40
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Gumby Orgy posted:Irregular periods + possible pregnancy means you should pee on a stick when? A missed period isn't exactly a missed period with extreme irregularity. That's where I was when I got pregnant. I first tried at about three weeks past the possible conception. I got a negative then. I didn't get a positive until 5 weeks past conception, which equals 7 weeks pregnant. If you're fairly sure of when you would have conceived, try starting at a few weeks past that date.
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Jul 28, 2011 18:24
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Exelsior posted:What country is she in? America. Susan B. Antimony posted:There are agencies she can work with--but most of them won't work with a women who doesn't already have her own children, so if she isn't a mom, she probably needs to table the idea. She has a one year old, and had an absolutely flawless pregnancy and labor.
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Jul 28, 2011 23:37
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Gumby Orgy posted:Irregular periods + possible pregnancy means you should pee on a stick when? A missed period isn't exactly a missed period with extreme irregularity.
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Jul 29, 2011 01:22
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WHEEZY HIDE A EGG posted:America. Well, hey! Good news! Next step: Where does she live? Agencies are generally reluctant/unwilling to work with women in AK , AL , AZ , DC , HI , IA , ID , IN , LA , MI , MO , MS , MT , ND , NE , NH , NJ , NM , NY , RI , SC , SD , WA , & WY. Also, what kind of health insurance does she have? Most (nonmilitary) policies specifically exclude surrogacy, and some require that the surrogate pay her entire fee to the insurance company. Of course, this is something an agency can go over with her. She will have to have a physical, counseling, and most likely a credit check. If that still sounds good, she should google "surrogacy agency" and go hog wild.
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Jul 29, 2011 01:30
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Huh, why are they reluctant to work with women from so many states?
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Jul 29, 2011 02:06
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Susan B. Antimony posted:Well, hey! Good news! Next step: Where does she live? Agencies are generally reluctant/unwilling to work with women in AK , AL , AZ , DC , HI , IA , ID , IN , LA , MI , MO , MS , MT , ND , NE , NH , NJ , NM , NY , RI , SC , SD , WA , & WY. Also, what kind of health insurance does she have? Most (nonmilitary) policies specifically exclude surrogacy, and some require that the surrogate pay her entire fee to the insurance company. Of course, this is something an agency can go over with her. She will have to have a physical, counseling, and most likely a credit check. If that still sounds good, she should google "surrogacy agency" and go hog wild. She's in VA, currently has no health insurance (her daughter is covered via Medicaid), and the physical/counseling/credit check shouldn't cause any problems. Is there a specific agency you would recommend or is googling "surrogacy agency " really the best way to go.?
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Jul 29, 2011 03:11
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I don't know of a particular agency, I'm afraid; I'm just a weird repository of information about ART and adoption. The laws in those states are "unfavorable to surrogacy"; usually what that means is that in those states, a pregnant woman is treated like a mother, period. In California, the state with the most favorable surrogacy laws, a gestational surrogate doesn't have custody of the baby at any time. In some states, the surrogate has to surrender the baby for adoption. Surrogacy is pretty odd. It's incredibly expensive ($75k-$150k, although if you go overseas you can get it done for ~$30k), and in a domestic surrogacy, the intended parents often want a level of control that would make most potential gestational carriers uncomfortable: I heard one mom-by-surrogacy talking about how she just had to grit her teeth and accept that her surrogate would occasionally eat goldfish crackers.
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Jul 29, 2011 20:16
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My husband and I started trying this month, as planned, and so far my pregnancy tests are coming up negative (though it's very early), but I'm either pregnant or I've got a tapeworm, because I've been eating anything that isn't nailed down. Seems way too early for me to be so hungry though, even if I am pregnant.
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Jul 29, 2011 20:39
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Sometimes symptoms start really early. I swear my breasts started growing the week I conceived, because I was up 3 sizes by the time I got a positive pregnancy test.
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Jul 29, 2011 22:03
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Mnemosyne posted:My husband and I started trying this month, as planned, and so far my pregnancy tests are coming up negative (though it's very early), but I'm either pregnant or I've got a tapeworm, because I've been eating anything that isn't nailed down. Seems way too early for me to be so hungry though, even if I am pregnant. My appetite went crazy in the week before I got my positive test. Anything with carbs. I was obsessed with food and couldn't concentrate on the slightest thing when I was hungry. Good luck with peeing on your stick!
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Jul 29, 2011 23:26
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Mnemosyne posted:My husband and I started trying this month, as planned, and so far my pregnancy tests are coming up negative (though it's very early), but I'm either pregnant or I've got a tapeworm, because I've been eating anything that isn't nailed down. Seems way too early for me to be so hungry though, even if I am pregnant. When did your last period start?
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Jul 30, 2011 02:56
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slinkimalinki posted:When did your last period start? July 6th, and my LH surge was the 18th and the 19th. My periods run anywhere from 23 days to 28, trending towards the shorter end of the spectrum (I've only charted one that was 28 days so far). Peed on a stick yesterday morning and I'm going to pee on one again tomorrow morning. The other thing that I've noticed that's weird is that my IT bands (in my thighs) have tightened up and are cramping like crazy. I did physical therapy for problems with my knees about a year and a half ago, and the physical therapy would sometimes cause tightness and cramping in my IT bands, but outside of physical therapy, I've never, ever in my life had a problem with them. And now they're tight and painful every day for at least the past week, despite my doing stretches for them every day. When I googled IT band tightness, it says it's common in athletes (which I am decidedly not) and pregnant women. Could just be a coincidence, especially since this seems like another one of those things where I wouldn't expect those kind of symptoms so soon.
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Jul 30, 2011 04:15
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Mnemosyne posted:
I figure I'll start peeing on sticks if my period is late, which would be 7-10 days from now. It's going to be a LONG 10 days. We're joking about the proto-baby right now... when we were in Maui, at the luau, a mom and dad pointed out to their daughter 'This is where mommy and daddy got married!". The photographer grins and asks if they went home with a souvenir and looks at the kid.. so now we refer to imaginary-baby as Sue... venir. (Insert a boy named sue remarks here, too). Have been eating everything in sight lately but I suepect that's way more a function of being on vacation (and then coming home and going to the county fair) than actual babymakin.
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Jul 30, 2011 18:26
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Cathis posted:That is actually pretty interesting... I have problems with my IT bands on a regular basis (nobody knows why), but now I know to keep a closer eye on them if I'm trying to get knocked up. One thing that they have you do in physical therapy for tight IT bands is to put one of those cylindrical foam rollers on the floor and roll back and forth on it (on your IT band). I don't have one of those, so last night I gave my husband the rolling pin (from the kitchen) and told him to go to town on my IT bands with it. It hurt, but I guess it worked, because they're a lot less painful today. May want to give it a try, pregnant or not.
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Jul 30, 2011 22:33
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I'm experiencing a miscarriage right now. It stopped growing at almost 7 weeks and had been in me about 4 weeks since then. I've heard different things as far as how long to wait before you try again. Anywhere between right away and 6 months or more. Does the time to wait depend on the method of MC? If it doesn't come out naturally by next Wednesday I have to see a doctor about other options. Would D&C versus natural change how soon we can try? We really want a baby and I'd just like to get this over with and try again as soon as possible. I just feel like these past months have been a waste.
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Jul 31, 2011 04:00
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Awesome Kristin posted:I'm experiencing a miscarriage right now. It stopped growing at almost 7 weeks and had been in me about 4 weeks since then. I've heard different things as far as how long to wait before you try again. Anywhere between right away and 6 months or more. I'm so sorry I've had 2x D&C's cause I really just didn't want to wait it out naturally. I only had to wait one cycle before I could try again.
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Jul 31, 2011 05:12
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dishonesty posted:I've had 2x D&C's cause I really just didn't want to wait it out naturally. I only had to wait one cycle before I could try again. Mine occurred naturally and I also had to wait only one cycle. I was at 9 weeks when I had my miscarriage.
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Jul 31, 2011 05:46
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I swear I've read that women are often extra-fertile just after a miscarriage. But I don't have a source on that, so maybe take it with a grain of salt.
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Jul 31, 2011 06:12
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