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Adun
Apr 15, 2001

Publicola
Fun Shoe

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

As a billionaire why go to a seedy happy ending massage parlor instead of hiring 5k a night escorts to come to your mansion?

Why not do both

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Pron on VHS
Nov 14, 2005

Blood Clots
Sweat Dries
Bones Heal
Suck it Up and Keep Wrestling
because of this

evilweasel
Aug 24, 2002

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

As a billionaire why go to a seedy happy ending massage parlor instead of hiring 5k a night escorts to come to your mansion?

maybe escorts give lovely massages and he also wanted the massage?????

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

lmao

sharknado slashfic
Jun 24, 2011


The trafficking aspect makes me wonder about the age of the girls who do the special services. Pure speculation of course.

Flikken
Oct 23, 2009

10,363 snaps and not a playoff win to show for it

sharknado slashfic posted:

The trafficking aspect makes me wonder about the age of the girls who do the special services. Pure speculation of course.

Oh,

I was going to go with serial killer.

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.
This would only be funnier if Tommy was with him

evilweasel
Aug 24, 2002

quote:

After law enforcement officials in Martin and Indian River counties shared details earlier this week about months-long investigations into spas and paid sex, Jupiter Police officials Friday are scheduled to talk about their role in the case.

A news conference is scheduled for 11:45 a.m. from the Police Department. One of the spas, Orchids of Asia Day Spa, is in Jupiter.

On Tuesday, asked whether celebrities or prominent people could be involved, Martin County Sheriff William Snyder said, “There will be a newsmaker in this one.”

i can just imagine the sheriff giggling at that question

sharknado slashfic
Jun 24, 2011

Flikken posted:

Oh,

I was going to go with serial killer.

If he didn't want wild speculation he should have just ordered prostitutes to his apartment tbh

axeil
Feb 14, 2006
Please reopen the laughing at the Patriots thread. This is hilarious

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Diva Cupcake posted:

It's Palm Beach, Florida. That's probably an accurate cross-section of local male demographics.

Sorry, I'm already halfway through my millennials are destroying the illegal sex spa industry.

Truther Vandross
Jun 17, 2008

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

This would only be funnier if Tommy was with him

He’d be showing the girl proper jerk off technique he learned from Guerrero

sean10mm
Jun 29, 2005

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, MAD-2R World
Kraft has very openly been a degenerate drunk pervert since his wife died, this is utterly unsurprising.

Well, it's "surprising" like Irsay getting busted for flakka instead of cocaine and oxy would be "surprising."

Spoeank
Jul 16, 2003

That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

sharknado slashfic posted:

The trafficking aspect makes me wonder about the age of the girls who do the special services. Pure speculation of course.

This was Epstein's MO so it's not wildly speculative.

Diqnol
May 10, 2010


lmaoooo

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

sean10mm posted:

Kraft has very openly been a degenerate drunk pervert since his wife died, this is utterly unsurprising.

Well, it's "surprising" like Irsay getting busted for flakka instead of cocaine and oxy would be "surprising."

Heh, was going to post about this. I imagine some assistant awoke Irsay at noon after a bender and Irsay muttering the words "amateur" as he stared at his ceiling.

Quiet Feet
Dec 14, 2009

THE HELL IS WITH THIS ASS!?





Adun posted:

Why not do both

Small brain: paying $80 for a handjob at a massage parlor.
Regular brain: hiring a 5k/night escort
Galaxy brain: pay a 5k/night escort to get a $80 handy at said massage parlor and describe it to you afterwards.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
Remember that “audition” tape a few months after his wife died? Yeah every Pats fan knew Bob was a perverted weirdo at best.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

Does he open-kiss?

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
This is literally 1/2 a mile from me as I type this and I’m super close with the prosecutor.

This ain’t poo poo if these current allegations they’re investigating are true.

Also this is right by Swickles parents lol

No Butt Stuff
Jun 10, 2004

Amy Pole Her posted:

This is literally 1/2 a mile from me as I type this and I’m super close with the prosecutor.

This ain’t poo poo if these current allegations they’re investigating are true.

Also this is right by Swickles parents lol

dramaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
There’s evidence several of the girls are underage. It’s unsure if they were working with customers or just being shipped through

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
Looks like this involves an entire ring of massage parlors stretching all the way to New York.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

Meanwhile Goodell pulls out his middle desk drawer to grab the Maalox bottle for another round.

Eltoasto
Aug 26, 2002

We come spinning out of nothingness, scattering stars like dust.



Pats writer is very concerned that people are being mean

Florida laws make it public though right? I don't think this is unusual for them.

https://twitter.com/BenVolin/status/1098991338886971392

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

Amy Pole Her posted:

There’s evidence several of the girls are underage. It’s unsure if they were working with customers or just being shipped through

Can you share any additional details?

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Looks like this involves an entire ring of massage parlors stretching all the way to New York.

Yeah the purpose of the whole investigation was human trafficking. This was the home port parlor and I guess several women with suitcases were seen moving in, regularly, at night.

The guy who tipped off the police is a barber lol imagine a barber is why Kraft goes down

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

Amy Pole Her posted:

Yeah the purpose of the whole investigation was human trafficking. This was the home port parlor and I guess several women with suitcases were seen moving in, regularly, at night.

The guy who tipped off the police is a barber lol imagine a barber is why Kraft goes down

Is Kraft being looked into as some associate in the “enterprise” or a solicitor?

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

Eltoasto posted:

Pats writer is very concerned that people are being mean

Florida laws make it public though right? I don't think this is unusual for them.

https://twitter.com/BenVolin/status/1098991338886971392

Does he live under a rock? Cripes everyday there is some crazy headline and the rest of the 49 states assume it comes from FL.

indigi
Jul 20, 2004

how can we not talk about family
when family's all that we got?

Groovelord Neato posted:

you're worth billions and you go to an 80 dollar per hour rub and tub joint? jfc bob.

don’t kinkshame

sean10mm
Jun 29, 2005

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, MAD-2R World

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Is Kraft being looked into as some associate in the “enterprise” or a solicitor?

It's just soliciting prostitution at the moment.

shirts and skins
Jun 25, 2007

Good morning!
I told you guys, that organization is involved in improperly deflated balls the whole way to the top

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Is Kraft being looked into as some associate in the “enterprise” or a solicitor?

Solicitor

His biggest question will be if they can prove the underage girls were part of the handjobs. If so Krafts nothing change of solicitation suddenly turns into statutory rape

Also if you’re a golf fan you’re gonna hate updates... 👀

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

Amy Pole Her posted:

Solicitor

His biggest question will be if they can prove the underage girls were part of the handjobs. If so Krafts nothing change of solicitation suddenly turns into statutory rape

Well they apparently have video of the acts so they should be able to find out.

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal

Amy Pole Her posted:

Solicitor

His biggest question will be if they can prove the underage girls were part of the handjobs. If so Krafts nothing change of solicitation suddenly turns into statutory rape

Also if you’re a golf fan you’re gonna hate updates... 👀

How do the charges differ from soliciting prostitution to soliciting prostitution with a minor?

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

seiferguy posted:

How do the charges differ from soliciting prostitution to soliciting prostitution with a minor?

Statutory rape because anyone under 16 cannot legally consent in any situation. Technically by the letter of the law the older girls even if they’re essentially slaves can consent so it’s not regarded as rape on the part of the John. I think.

sean10mm
Jun 29, 2005

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, MAD-2R World
Kraft could be guilty of horrible crimes that he would deserve a bullet behind the ear for... and he would still be 99% guaranteed to get away with it.

An old white billionaire isn't going to get punished for poo poo in Trump's America. He'll plead out to some trivial charge and pay a fine, at most, even if his charges are 100x as severe as what they are now.

DLC Inc
Jun 1, 2011

sean10mm posted:

Kraft could be guilty of horrible crimes that he would deserve a bullet behind the ear for... and he would still be 99% guaranteed to get away with it.

An old white billionaire isn't going to get punished for poo poo in Trump's America. He'll plead out to some trivial charge and pay a fine, at most, even if his charges are 100x as severe as what they are now.

it's worth it since now he loses his dipshit moral high ground on anything

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


i mean he kinda already did when he started loving 20 somethings after myra died.

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Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
Kraft should be forced to step down as owner and just go away. If Irsays 6 game suspension is the baseline then it seems appropriate.

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