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Yeah, I wouldn't accuse Rothfuss of being a plot writer.
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May 27, 2013 06:34
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He actually said, "It took like ten years to realize that I suck at plot."
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May 27, 2013 06:38
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So he never actually read his books for the first ten years, bless him. I'd give him a bunch of lemon cakes and say there's another haul if Dany dies and a second batch if *~*Daario*~* is the one who does it.
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May 27, 2013 08:52
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rypakal posted:Why... why would you want this? Deep down you know you want it too. 
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May 27, 2013 10:05
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Joramun posted:Deep down you know you want it too. Something tells me it'll be the horniest book in the series. 
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May 27, 2013 10:11
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I'm sure there'll be a lot of blowing going on.
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May 27, 2013 10:15
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I could have sworn the Sticky Princes made it into Cersei and Ned's conversation in season 1.
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May 27, 2013 11:44
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Not explicitly.Lena Headey posted:In the rare event that Robert leaves his whores for long enough to stumble drunk into my bed, I finish him off in other ways. But it is a quote from book 4 when she's pleasuring Taena Merryweather, so there's still a chance it'll make it in come season 5 (the AFFC/ADWD season). AFFC posted:Ten thousand of your children perished in my palm, Your Grace, she thought, slipping a third finger into Myr. Whilst you snored, I would lick your sons off my face and fingers one by one, all those pale sticky princes. You claimed your rights, my lord, but in the darkness I would eat your heirs.
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May 27, 2013 12:00
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Joramun posted:I'm sure there'll be a lot of blowing going on. The cover art makes it clear. The "winds of winter" will be Jon farting through the horn, bringing down the Wall with his mighty flatulance. HONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNK
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May 27, 2013 12:25
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My favourite ever ASOIAF theory was when someone suggested that the horn Euron blew in Feast was actually the horn of Joramun, so in Dance there'd be a Jon chapter where the wall suddenly just fell down and everyone would be, like, WTF? Didn't happen. 
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May 27, 2013 12:46
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It could still be that horn it just needs to be at the wall to work. Why would blowing it anywhere else in the world cause the wall to explode?
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May 27, 2013 13:23
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Vigilance posted:I love how successful the fatties are in the books. Gurm takes good care of Doran, Manderly, and Varys. He even makes a good case for their obesity being beneficial to their health rather than detrimental. ADWD posted:Ser Hosteen Frey ripped his longsword from its scabbard and leapt toward Wyman Manderly. The Lord of White Harbor tried to jerk away, but the tabletop pinned him to his chair. The blade slashed through three of his four chins in a spray of bright red blood. Lady Walda gave a shriek and clutched at her lord husband's arm. "Stop," Roose Bolton shouted. "Stop this madness." His own men rushed forward as the Manderlys vaulted over the benches to get at the Freys. One lunged at Ser Hosteen with a dagger, but the big knight pivoted and took his arm off at the shoulder. Lord Wyman pushed to his feet, only to collapse. Old Lord Locke was shouting for a maester as Manderly flopped on the floor like a clubbed walrus in a spreading pool of blood. Around him dogs fought over sausages. Any svelte man would have died from that, but Lord Manderly's three chins saved his life. I'm pretty sure this is the Gurm speaking directly to his readers who claim he's in such bad shape he might not live long enough to finish the series.
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May 27, 2013 13:29
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Joramun posted:Deep down you know you want it too. A Ramsay-centric book I guess.
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May 27, 2013 13:42
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Victarion, more likely. Ramsay is not a hornblower in the books, that's a show invention.
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May 27, 2013 13:51
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Have they cast Victarion yet? If not, Ioan Gruffudd. Because he's Hornblower, you see.
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May 27, 2013 14:05
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Joramun posted:Victarion, more likely. Ramsay is not a hornblower in the books, that's a show invention. Iwan Rheon is my headcanon 
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May 27, 2013 14:12
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Joramun posted:He even makes a good case for their obesity being beneficial to their health rather than detrimental. One might point out to him it was the fact his extra chins protruded forward that caused him to be hit at all. A single-chinned man might have gotten a close shave, but no blood drawn (nor would they be stuck by the tabletop). And it would only be too good if GURM escaped with his life because some crazy person only managed to cut through 3 of his 4 chins in a rage that he stop writing about football.
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May 27, 2013 14:40
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:The cover art makes it clear. The "winds of winter" will be Jon farting through the horn, bringing down the Wall with his mighty flatulance. I immediately thought of Roy Dotrice's horrible need to make horn noises in the audio version but god drat I wouldn't mind it if he did his haroooooooooo or whatever for Jon farting into the horn.
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May 27, 2013 16:20
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Hunky Joe posted:I immediately thought of Roy Dotrice's horrible need to make horn noises in the audio version but god drat I wouldn't mind it if he did his haroooooooooo or whatever for Jon farting into the horn.
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May 27, 2013 16:23
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BananaNutkins posted:He was really nice in person and not at all pervy. I rode the elevator with him. He was wearing his sailor hat and suspenders get up. It was a reallly small con, so he and Patrick Rothfuss were just chilling in the lobby and anyone could walk up and talk to them. Did you promote A Game of Bones?
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May 27, 2013 17:00
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Am I the only one who doesn't care about the sex scenes? They're short and don't detract from the rest of the chapter/plot (Or book, for that matter).
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May 27, 2013 18:42
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If anything they are too short and infrequent. That is why esteemed author T.B. Thread sacrificed his soul to Beelzebub to craft the seminal work A Game of Bones, which amends those issues.
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May 27, 2013 19:20
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I didn't care about them at first and glossed over them. Two years have passed since ADWD and all that sticks out to me are how absurd the sex scenes are and how much poop Dany's tiny body can produce.
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May 27, 2013 19:22
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Maybe if she didn't poop so much, she wouldn't be so small?
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May 27, 2013 19:32
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Yes, it's like a lava lamp.
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PittTheElder posted:Maybe if she didn't poop so much, she wouldn't be so small? Conversely, does that mean Brienne is just constipated?
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May 27, 2013 19:34
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PittTheElder posted:Maybe if she didn't poop so much, she wouldn't be so small?
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May 27, 2013 19:35
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Joramun posted:Conversely, does that mean Brienne is just constipated? Well when she protested to Renly's guards that she didn't kill him, they thought she was full of poo poo. 
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May 27, 2013 19:42
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This thread has gone from lemoncake and rape jokes to bad puns. Congratulations, I've rated this thread from a 1 to a 2 and I'm going hog wild. Speaking of which, it may be time to close this monstrosity fairly soon to start a new one.
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May 27, 2013 19:55
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Contra Calculus posted:This thread has gone from lemoncake and rape jokes to bad puns. Congratulations, I've rated this thread from a 1 to a 2 and I'm going hog wild. Speaking of which, it may be time to close this monstrosity fairly soon to start a new one. B-But The Winds of Winter isn't out yet. What would it be called?
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May 27, 2013 19:57
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Personperson14 posted:B-But The Winds of Winter isn't out yet. What would it be called? The Gusts of Autumn The Breezes of Pre-Winter The Gales of Post-Summer The Drafts of Fall
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May 27, 2013 20:00
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Contra Calculus posted:This thread has gone from lemoncake and rape jokes to bad puns. Congratulations, I've rated this thread from a 1 to a 2 and I'm going hog wild. Speaking of which, it may be time to close this monstrosity fairly soon to start a new one. Lets wait untill this bad boy gets to page 666 and then close it.
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May 27, 2013 20:01
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El Hefe posted:Lets wait untill this bad boy gets to page 666 and then close it. Actually, this is a good policy since I'm literally 12 years old. Let's do that.
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May 27, 2013 20:11
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What is the point in the word "nuncle"? It just means uncle. It's just uncle with an extra letter.
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May 27, 2013 20:16
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Contra Calculus posted:Actually, this is a good policy since I'm literally 12 years old. Let's do that. I'm 69 years old boy don't get sassy with me.
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May 27, 2013 20:16
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Joramun posted:The Gusts of Autumn The Boys of Summer you uncultured plebe.
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May 27, 2013 20:18
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Was there no episode last night?
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May 27, 2013 20:21
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mind the walrus posted:The Boys of Summer you uncultured plebe. I'm cultured enough to know that that is a pleonasm. 
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May 27, 2013 20:27
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Aurain posted:What is the point in the word "nuncle"? The point is Shakespeare had some jesters say it and GRRM wants to sound all Yea Olde Englishe fancy.
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May 27, 2013 20:28
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Aurain posted:What is the point in the word "nuncle"? I presume it is some sort of corruption of mine uncle or the like.
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May 27, 2013 20:28
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Rounsey is one of the better words GRRM uses in place of words people actually use. I have to give him credit there. Balls to Shakespeare though.
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May 27, 2013 20:39
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