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Grassy Knowles posted:Tide is actually entirely useless and needs to personally asses the toilet-training capabilities of new hires to hide the fact that they're incapable of providing value to the company. those who can't provide value assess value
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Jan 1, 2018 19:01
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Point proven
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Jan 1, 2018 19:08
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Oh boy, John Smith is back. I was complaining about not having enough to do. Being an rear end in a top hat isn't automatically against the rules, so you don't have to report every post he makes. And "gently caress off John Smith forever" might be a good motto, but it contributes even less than what he does.
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Jan 1, 2018 19:22
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Looking to get more contracts for web development this year, what’s the secret process for larger companies? Every time I’ve pulled a big contract it’s because of a personal or at least college relationship. (Very rarely, their leads from people on my staff of previously worked for, but they are never large enough to support even a small project team.)
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Jan 1, 2018 20:55
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Golden Bee posted:what’s the secret process for larger companies? Nepotism.
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Jan 1, 2018 22:15
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Golden Bee posted:Looking to get more contracts for web development this year, what’s the secret process for larger companies? Every time I’ve pulled a big contract it’s because of a personal or at least college relationship. (Very rarely, their leads from people on my staff of previously worked for, but they are never large enough to support even a small project team.) The answer to the question you're really asking is: no, sorry, there really is no way to advance in the corporate world besides the three most important things: connections, connections, connections.
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Jan 1, 2018 23:20
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evobatman posted:Nepotism. That or get on their RFP email list and be cheaper than the other guy. But yeah, nepotism mostly.
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Jan 1, 2018 23:32
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Eric the Mauve posted:The answer to the question you're really asking is: no, sorry, there really is no way to advance in the corporate world besides the three most important things: connections, connections, connections. who's balls do I have to lick to get a promotion 'round here?
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Jan 2, 2018 12:56
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Renegret posted:who's balls do I have to lick to get a promotion 'round here? if you have to ask you aren't gonna get one by licking any balls Also speaking of licking balls I'm gonna get the better promotion I was talking about earlier, I worked it out with the bosses and we're just going to push back my start date on the promotion a month so that there are more investigators eligible under a tenure requirement for the old position. I won't be working in the new role until that month is done but I'll be getting up to speed and winding down my workload, and showing the presumptive candidate how to work one of my side tasks so he can take over.
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Jan 2, 2018 13:59
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Tide posted:The proverbial you has to pay your dues. Suck it up, princess. Yeah you do have to pay your dues. Its called "entry level job positions" if your hireing dudes for high level poo poo then making them do all the basic poo poo after they already have a few years of experience with references backing up their ability to do that you've hosed up lmao
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Jan 2, 2018 14:34
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Unless it's at a really small business/startup nobody who gets above middle management ever starts at entry level. Entry level is for poors and a sky high brick wall separates it from management. "Paying your dues" is bullshit that in my experience is actually peddled less by management and more by the entry level people who have been there for 12 years as an excuse for being dicks to newly hired entry level people, which is their only fleeting joy in life
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Jan 2, 2018 16:25
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Moneyball posted:Oh boy, John Smith is back. I was complaining about not having enough to do. I do find this political tone rather insane, but I understand and accept that that is the general consensus. Shrug. John Smith fucked around with this message at 18:08 on Jan 2, 2018 |
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Jan 2, 2018 18:01
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Nah, it's just that you are A) an rear end in a top hat and B) think being an rear end in a top hat means you're somehow more honest and truthful. What it actually means is that you possess the emotional maturity of a 13 year old. Most people quickly recognize this and ignore you as someone with nothing of value to contribute to the conversation.
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Jan 2, 2018 18:35
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Happy new year, TPS thread. I spent my Christmas break sick in bed, which is better than spending actual sick leave sick in bed, but not by much. Back to work, I guess.
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Jan 2, 2018 18:49
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edit: gently caress this thread
The Sean fucked around with this message at 20:17 on Apr 24, 2020 |
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Jan 2, 2018 19:06
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Sundae posted:Back to work, I guess. Indeed. First day back and it looks like facilities didn't fully adjust the office heating to the cold snap. I'm using the residual heat of my (admittedly contraband) electric kettle to warm my hands. I'm working at the headquarters of a Fortune 50 company or some Dickensian dirt factory, it's not clear.
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Jan 2, 2018 19:08
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If you want to be warmer, try being worth more than the coal we lavishly spent on! 
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Jan 2, 2018 19:31
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Last day of vacation before getting back to it. I've successfully stayed away from my emails for the last week and a half. I legitimately fear what I'm walking into tomorrow.
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Jan 2, 2018 20:05
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paragon1 posted:If you want to be warmer, try being worth more than the coal we lavishly spent on! (standing in front of a Kuerig that broke halfway through a pour) 
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Jan 2, 2018 20:37
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edit: gently caress this thread
The Sean fucked around with this message at 20:17 on Apr 24, 2020 |
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Jan 2, 2018 20:41
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Sometimes our corporate e-mail picks the oddest things to not collapse in a message chain.
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Jan 2, 2018 23:39
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Sundae posted:Sometimes our corporate e-mail picks the oddest things to not collapse in a message chain. Ron!
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Jan 2, 2018 23:48
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My desire to know what the .png is and if it relates to my dude Ron is intensifying.
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Jan 2, 2018 23:49
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Renegret posted:It's 2018 folks how do you not have him on ignore by now Add a new years resolution to your ignore list, thread.
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Jan 3, 2018 01:09
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Eric the Mauve posted:Unless it's at a really small business/startup nobody who gets above middle management ever starts at entry level. Entry level is for poors and a sky high brick wall separates it from management. "Paying your dues" is bullshit that in my experience is actually peddled less by management and more by the entry level people who have been there for 12 years as an excuse for being dicks to newly hired entry level people, which is their only fleeting joy in life I'm starting to see that this is true. It doesn't matter what you know, how consistent you are, or what you can deliver. "No I can't get you any raises. No I can't get you a promotion, but after 5 years you can move one step with a 1.00$/hr pay raise. Maybe, if HR approves." gently caress you. I'm responsible for the testing on whether or not you recall 1.4 billion in licensed drug product. Jesus, I need a new job.
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Jan 3, 2018 02:01
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Higgy posted:My desire to know what the .png is and if it relates to my dude Ron is intensifying. It's definitely Ron's email signature.
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Jan 3, 2018 02:10
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SpartanIV posted:It's definitely Ron's email signature. It's probably a dope signature, then. I like Ron, he seems like a good guy. edit: content Broke down and read an email and immediately realized from two lines that: * The person in charge of doing application scanning on new applications that our software engineering group develops was told he wasn't in charge of it anymore * My name came up because I project managed an effort to get rid of our backlog of application scans and get us in audit compliance for these things * There is now no one in charge of scans and I can already tell that no effort has been made to identify anyone to lead those efforts which means * No one is scanning our applications for vulnerabilities and hasn't been for nearly 6 months now which has effectively undone my entire project from last year I think I still have some vodka left from the holidays... Higgy fucked around with this message at 02:20 on Jan 3, 2018 |
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Jan 3, 2018 02:12
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Mourne posted:I'm starting to see that this is true. It doesn't matter what you know, how consistent you are, or what you can deliver. You should make your way over to the negotiation thread. Not so much for the actual negotiation advice, which is great, but to read stories of people who actually looked for new jobs and realized how much more hey were worth to a different employer.
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Jan 3, 2018 02:32
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Da-do Da-do
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Jan 3, 2018 02:51
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^---  I failed my last day of this vacation and got caught up on emails. Can't wait to get in tomorrow and start putting out fires. Super can't wait to inform management that a critical function hasn't been getting done and it's their fault for not staffing it appropriately, and put together yet another monthly report to show how we're going to run out of money for one of my bigger projects because congress can't pass a budget. Higgy fucked around with this message at 03:01 on Jan 3, 2018 |
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Jan 3, 2018 02:58
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Higgy posted:^--- Don't feel bad, if you're in a position with fires, then spending a little time to catch up before going back in is an investment in knowing whose rear end to kick first.
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Jan 3, 2018 05:05
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Today was email day! Everyone has waited all December to get back to me, including people who haven’t messaged me since August.
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Jan 3, 2018 05:44
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paragon1 posted:Nah, it's just that you are A) an rear end in a top hat and B) think being an rear end in a top hat means you're somehow more honest and truthful. After all, nobody (except for Zero Gravitas himself) disputes the objective fact that his career decisions has been a contributing factor (to whatever extent and moral responsibility one may so assess) towards his current situation, right? It is merely that SA's subjective cultural norms are that we shouldn't explicitly state this outright, which I have already understood and accepted as being so. What then is the issue? Why then are you derailing this thread yourself then, hypocrite?
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Jan 3, 2018 13:51
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Jan 3, 2018 14:02
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A good dog! I would pet that dog and give it headscratches.
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Jan 3, 2018 16:18
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Awwww who’s the EVP of cuddles? You awww! That’s wight you awwww!
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Jan 3, 2018 16:28
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Today i had a choice, go back to work earlier than planned and start working on all of the very tight timelined projects everyone dumped on me before christmas, or stay home as planned to apply to jobs. Gonna call a recruiter back this afternoon ( different guy than “how long is a string” jerk face.). 
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Jan 3, 2018 17:39
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Came across an interesting article on how all the top players in silicon valley basically network and do business at crazy sex and drug parties https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2018/01/brotopia-silicon-valley-secretive-orgiastic-inner-sanctum Sundae, any comments on the bro culture out there, at least in your experience? You dont have to admit to how you got your dream job.....
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Jan 3, 2018 17:42
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Tnuctip posted:Came across an interesting article on how all the top players in silicon valley basically network and do business at crazy sex and drug parties Honestly, I have very little exposure to it because I'm a pharma goon and not a brogrammer. I've heard plenty of stories about it from people who've lived here longer, but that article is about the extent of what I've heard. There's plenty of hosed up poo poo out here, but most of it is your standard boring economics / Prop 13 madness / idiots spending $500 on dog manicures. I think my field is a little more... traditional? No idea what word to use when comparing to SV orgies.
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Jan 3, 2018 18:36
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 "cultural norms". No you aren't right, and that you take no one bothering to address your childish tiresome rear end as tacit agreement would be hilarious if it wasn't so pathetic. Lol at you in particular accusing someone of derailing a thread. The issue is that you're an rear end in a top hat who only posts rear end in a top hat things, and then does the internet equivalent of throwing off your shirt while shouting COME AT ME BRO any time someone points this out. And on top of all this you have so far not even been right about anything ever. ~going back to ignoring you now~
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Jan 3, 2018 18:37
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