Volkerball posted:

i got a 30 on my act despite math, i ain't worried about any of that other poo poo. and i know for a fact i don't have to take any english.


i've been operating and setting up cnc machines for 6 years. i've already picked up the base knowledge i need for the class. probably ahead of most people. just let me goddamn take it.

Rafza posted:

nooooooo

Joementum posted:

Sharkie posted:

The Teens for Trump twirl off the stage, their spurs and six-shooters gleaming in the camera flashes.

"Aren't they the best folks? Give 'em a hand. Aren't they beautiful?" Trump slaps his hands together and the crowd does the same.

"Thats how it oughta be. That's how...that's how kids used to be in this country. Clean and beautiful. You got kids...they look more like convicts, running around with their pants sagging. No respect for their parents. No respect for the police." Trump swings his arm to gesture to his honor guard, their gloves white like snow. The crowd screams and hoots.

"That's gonna change folks. I'm gonna make America great again and you're going to love it. It'll be like it was. It'll all be like it used to be. Great and strong. I'm gonna make everything great again. Everything!"

"Proud to Be An American" by Lee Greenwood begins to play...fog fills the stage as the lights go out and a laser lightshow begins spackling the stage with rainbow light like starships warring.

"EVERYTHING! Everything will be great again. I can do it!"

Spotlights swing to the center of the stage as a shadow rises. It grows larger, looming over Trump. It begins to emerge from the fog. It...no, it can't be. It can't!

"Say hello to an old, to a great friend, an old friend of mine...." The shadow lopes to join Trump at the podium, and it's.....against all hope, all reason....it's

IT'S HARAMBE! The crowd explodes. Screams and cheers and whoops shake the stadium. Harambe! He's alive! He's alive and on stage with Trump!

Trump strokes his fur as Harambe kneels before him like a vassal knight.

"We caught an angel folks. We caught an angel; I got the best team, some real smart guys, tough guys, and we caught an angel. Dragged it right outta Heaven. And folks, lemme tell ya, we made that angel play ball!" Loud weeping is heard from the crowd before it's swallowed up in the joyscreams of ten thousand throats. "It sounded just like a baby, can you believe that? Big tough angel and it cried like a little baby."

Trump turns his lips down in a comic pout and balls his fists at the corners of his eyes. "Pathetic! We made that angel play ball, just like we're gonna make the rest of the world play ball!"

A roar pounds from the loudspeakers. The stage is washed with gold light as.....dear God. No. Yes. It's....

CECIL! CECIL THE LION! Cecil the Lion bounds onto the stage. He faces the crowd and roars. A golden T hangs on a golden chain around his neck. He fawns at Trumps feet.

"We made that crybaby angel play ball. And let me tell you. It offered me a miracle. And you know what I said folks?"

"I said no. I want two."

Rollofthedice posted:

GhostofJohnMuir posted:

probably will be the last religious democrat

BI NOW GAY LATER posted:

Nah

BI NOW GAY LATER posted:

Nah

Berke Negri posted:

yeah, clinton goes to church

Jagchosis posted:

obama is a shia cleric so???

Berke Negri posted:

that's just a cover for his true religion

Berke Negri posted:

that's just a cover for his true religion

Sharkie posted:

The Teens for Trump twirl off the stage, their spurs and six-shooters gleaming in the camera flashes.

"Aren't they the best folks? Give 'em a hand. Aren't they beautiful?" Trump slaps his hands together and the crowd does the same.

"Thats how it oughta be. That's how...that's how kids used to be in this country. Clean and beautiful. You got kids...they look more like convicts, running around with their pants sagging. No respect for their parents. No respect for the police." Trump swings his arm to gesture to his honor guard, their gloves white like snow. The crowd screams and hoots.

"That's gonna change folks. I'm gonna make America great again and you're going to love it. It'll be like it was. It'll all be like it used to be. Great and strong. I'm gonna make everything great again. Everything!"

"Proud to Be An American" by Lee Greenwood begins to play...fog fills the stage as the lights go out and a laser lightshow begins spackling the stage with rainbow light like starships warring.

"EVERYTHING! Everything will be great again. I can do it!"

Spotlights swing to the center of the stage as a shadow rises. It grows larger, looming over Trump. It begins to emerge from the fog. It...no, it can't be. It can't!

"Say hello to an old, to a great friend, an old friend of mine...." The shadow lopes to join Trump at the podium, and it's.....against all hope, all reason....it's

IT'S HARAMBE! The crowd explodes. Screams and cheers and whoops shake the stadium. Harambe! He's alive! He's alive and on stage with Trump!

Trump strokes his fur as Harambe kneels before him like a vassal knight.

"We caught an angel folks. We caught an angel; I got the best team, some real smart guys, tough guys, and we caught an angel. Dragged it right outta Heaven. And folks, lemme tell ya, we made that angel play ball!" Loud weeping is heard from the crowd before it's swallowed up in the joyscreams of ten thousand throats. "It sounded just like a baby, can you believe that? Big tough angel and it cried like a little baby."

Trump turns his lips down in a comic pout and balls his fists at the corners of his eyes. "Pathetic! We made that angel play ball, just like we're gonna make the rest of the world play ball!"

A roar pounds from the loudspeakers. The stage is washed with gold light as.....dear God. No. Yes. It's....

CECIL! CECIL THE LION! Cecil the Lion bounds onto the stage. He faces the crowd and roars. A golden T hangs on a golden chain around his neck. He fawns at Trumps feet.

"We made that crybaby angel play ball. And let me tell you. It offered me a miracle. And you know what I said folks?"

"I said no. I want two."

fishmech posted:

his true religion being of course:

Mr Hootington posted:

There is a going party after work at a local dive bar. I do not know if I want to go.

Chantilly Say posted:

I really like this new direction for your posting, it's a good look for you.

paranoid randroid posted:

Donald holds up his hands, interrupting the applause.

"Folks, I got something to admit to you. It's a big thing to say, but I gotta say it."

The audience is rapt, silent, hanging on every word.

"I got an enlarged heart. It's the best heart, I love it, but it's a problem. My doctor, Clint Burlington," he gestures at the long-haired man in coke bottle glasses standing at his side, "he says I got five months to live."

A gasp runs through the crowd.

"Wanna know why it's enlarged? Wanna know how my heart got so big?"

Someone close to the front, a woman with mascara beginning to run from the tears pouring down her face, cries "Yes! Oh God, tell us!"

Donald smiles and flashes her a thumbs up.

"I'll tell you - it got so big because I had to make room for all of you in it."

The lights dim, I Will Remember You plays as footage of Donald feeding a baby unicorn is shown on the screen behind the stage.

Jagchosis posted:

And tonight, Breitbart News reported that more than 50 Fox on-air personalities will walk if Ailes is forced out. One Fox source says the article is spin, and that there's no talk of mass exodus among anchors. “This is being made up,” the person said.

Berke Negri posted:

I have heard this bandied about though the question I have is where exactly are Fox News personalities supposed to go if they quit FNC.

GhostofJohnMuir posted:

no one gives a poo poo about religion anymore binow

Arrgytehpirate posted:

I'm a bit late on the post your ACT scores but I didn't take either the SAT or the ACT and I dropped out of high school. I managed to get a 91 on my ASVAB though so that should tell you something.

Arrgytehpirate posted:

I'm a bit late on the post your ACT scores but I didn't take either the SAT or the ACT and I dropped out of high school. I managed to get a 91 on my ASVAB though so that should tell you something.

GhostofJohnMuir posted:

no one gives a poo poo about religion anymore binow

paranoid randroid posted:

i got a zero on my tests and they sent me to a special school for people who get confused by short sentences

Chantilly Say posted:

Legalize _eed

fishmech posted:

making visual jokes based on fashion brands is self-limiting (since you didn't get it, True Religion is one of those)