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Spermy Smurf posted:My soon to be mother in law gave us a list of 106 people FROM HER SIDE OF THE FAMILY that we should invite. Shovel, you can use it to bury her body under the patio later.
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May 5, 2010 17:59
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I am kind of glad that I am not the only person whose parents (well, mother; my dad gives no fucks so long as I am happy) are completely insane and making this whole thing much more difficult than it needs to be. Simultaneously you all have my sympathies because I know exactly how exasperating this is.
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May 5, 2010 18:42
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My MIL has been surprisingly quiet this entire time. My mother so far has just has been supportive and not in control. We really don't have any wedding traditions on my family that would warrant her wanting me to do things a certain way. Maybe it's just too early for everybody to go crazy.
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May 5, 2010 19:10
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The same MiL that wants to invive 100 people went over the "something borrowed, something new, something blue" thing. Somehow, she figured the Wedding Cake knives are old, so that'd be perfect. I pointed out both flaws in the plan (my fiance damned well better not walk up the aisle with a knife in her hand, and there is no 'something old' in the old wives tale) and she got super grumpy. It was like having a 5 year old stomp her feet, pout, then just glare at you for the next 30 minutes.
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May 5, 2010 19:30
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My mom and I fought over my dress (she offered to take me out and buy it) but eventually came to a compromise in which we're both happy with the dress, and she ended up buying me two. Win win! But then whenever we're around each other more than one hour we tend to fight. Basically I want a CASUAL wedding, implying that people should dress CASUALLY. But she said my dress choices were too CASUAL! Also she wanted floor length while I wanted knee length or shorter. And she wanted white, and I hate wearing white... Casual, mom. Casual. And I'm tall enough that floor length makes me look like some kind of she-hulk. Hulk smash! Edit: Spermy Smurf posted:my fiance damned well better not walk up the aisle with a knife in her hand You just lost out on an excellent photo op, not to mention the chance to play the "Psycho" theme while she walks down the aisle.
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May 5, 2010 19:35
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Yeah, there was really no way we could get out of inviting a lot of family. Big, close families entail a lot of invites. I probably have 25 cousins who I see 4-5 times a year, most of whom are married. Just 1st cousins, aunts/uncles, and grandparents are going to be like 70 people for my side. Fiancee's family is similar. Turns out the dad-in-law is going to pay for a good chunk of the reception, so he is inviting a bunch of people who we probably wouldn't have invited otherwise (but all of whom my fiancee knows quite well), so I don't care.
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May 5, 2010 20:00
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Spermy Smurf posted:I pointed out both flaws in the plan (my fiance damned well better not walk up the aisle with a knife in her hand, and there is no 'something old' in the old wives tale) and she got super grumpy. It was like having a 5 year old stomp her feet, pout, then just glare at you for the next 30 minutes. Um, yes there is. The full text of the verse is: Something old, something new, Something borrowed, something blue, And silver sixpence in your shoe. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wedding#European_customs However, you are right to argue that those items are to be worn during the ceremony, not used for the reception.
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May 5, 2010 20:34
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Weddings really seem to bring out the craziness. When I first started planning, I told my mom that I didn't want to do favors. Instead, I would pick a charity and give them the money I would have spent on useless crap. She said this was tactless. Then, she talks with my aunt and suddenly she has this great idea that I don't have to give favors. It is so frustrating. So random question: Do wedding favors matter?
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May 6, 2010 02:32
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tortueperdue posted:So random question: Do wedding favors matter? The last three weddings I have been to have not had favors and nobody even brought it up let alone cared. The two before that did have favors and I don't think anyone who went actually remembers what the favor was assuming they even took it home to begin with. In the grand scheme of things they really don't matter at all, but depending on your family some people might think you are "doing it wrong" by not giving them free stuff. You probably know already if that is your family. That said, I plan to have favors at my wedding. We're making heart shaped sugar cookies with royal icing for everyone and they will be adorable and delicious 
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May 6, 2010 02:52
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tortueperdue posted:
Not really, no. I like your idea of giving a bit of money to a charity better than buying/making/whatever some favors (for people who are better off than those who benefit from charity). As a guest, I'd like it quite a bit to know money went to someplace that really needed it instead of paying for, say....personalized matchbooks, tiny candles, teensy photo frames or M&Ms with monograms or something.
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May 6, 2010 03:19
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Kitten Kisses posted:We're making heart shaped sugar cookies with royal icing for everyone and they will be adorable and delicious Homemade favours would certainly be more likely to be remembered than the heart-shaped hot-chocolate whisks and whatnot I've seen.  As my partner is a music student, we're doing CDs of his compositions for this year as favours. This has also been his only willing contribution to the whole event other than "Food? At the wedding? That's a great idea!" 
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May 6, 2010 03:33
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The coolest wedding favor I've seen is a mix CD the couple made and handed out copies of.
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May 6, 2010 03:38
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We got a catering quote today- $3600 for our venue, linens and equipment, two cash bars, buffet style food and appetizers, plus champagne toast and cake cutting for 60 people. On the downside, the cash bar apparently doesn't cover soda or water, like I thought it would, and only has lovely canned beer on offer. I'm not making my guests pay $2 for a can of coke and $4 for a can of Budweiser (I don't want Budweiser there at all). I saw that venue today and I really like it- I think we could get just the top floor for $300 less and still have plenty of space. There's even a good room for a ceremony! We can get barbecue from our favorite place for $500... Not sure what venue would allow outside food and drink though. That seems like it would be a good way to do it, if it were possible to work out the logistics.
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May 6, 2010 06:30
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tortueperdue posted:Weddings really seem to bring out the craziness. When I first started planning, I told my mom that I didn't want to do favors. Instead, I would pick a charity and give them the money I would have spent on useless crap. She said this was tactless. Then, she talks with my aunt and suddenly she has this great idea that I don't have to give favors. It is so frustrating. This reminded me of a cute idea I've seen before, probably here. You do charity donations instead of wedding favors, but you choose 2 or 3 charities, and give each guest a card with the choices so they can choose which charity you donate for in their honor. It gives them some participation and seems a little more favor-like that way.
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May 6, 2010 14:05
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tortueperdue posted:Weddings really seem to bring out the craziness. When I first started planning, I told my mom that I didn't want to do favors. Instead, I would pick a charity and give them the money I would have spent on useless crap. She said this was tactless. Then, she talks with my aunt and suddenly she has this great idea that I don't have to give favors. It is so frustrating. I almost never take wedding favors as I don't need another pen/box of candy/tiny picture frame etc... For my own wedding I did favors. I got married in a garden, so as favors we bought a bunch of those $1.50 tiny cacti/succulents from Home Depot and let people take those. Some people didn't take any at all, some more horticulturally-inclined people took multiple ones. A friend of mine still has about five growing on her windowsill.
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May 6, 2010 20:28
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Zeris posted:Cross post from LAN Eastern Canada thread, in case there are any knowledgeable Ottawa residents here. I didn't see that anyone answered you so I will  . Right now tulips are blooming everywhere so it might be a bit hard to find a secluded place, although it's really drat pretty so it's a gorgeous time to propose. I would go to Dow's Lake, it's a pretty big park and you'll probably be able to find a spot away from the crowds. (map: http://maps.google.ca/maps?hl=en&cl...1,0.077162&z=14 )I love going there and it'd be the perfect reason, going all "oh let's go see the tulips while we're here" and you'd have things to do before and after. A lot of people go for picnics there so it won't look suspicious. The other ottawa parks, like parliament hill and such, will be pretty packed. I don't know if you want to go for something even smaller, but then you won't have much to do while you're there... If you really want secluded, go to the Gatineau Park. That thing is freaking huge so you better have a car if you want to go there, but it's also very pretty and I don't see how you could not find a good spot there. Here's their website http://www.capitaleducanada.gc.ca/bins/ncc_web_content_page.asp?cid=16297-16299-10170&lang=1 -------- Alright so now for the real reason I'm here... I want to propose to my guy. In fact, I kinda wish I had started planning earlier because I would have loved to propose during the tulip festival but oh well, I'm sure I'll find a good time. My problem is more with the fact that I want to give him an engagement necklace instead of a ring, since I already gave him a ring on our two year anniversary that he wears all the time and says he loves. I posted a thread in CC about my ideas and I was wondering if you guys could take a look at it and tell me what you think. It'd be a meteorite necklace, pretty neat looking I'm hoping. Here's the thread http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3301143 This thread is like crack, I love reading it. Although you guys really go all out on your weddings, I'm probably just going to have a very short ceremony (non-religious) then a big bbq in a park somewhere with friends and family.
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May 7, 2010 00:59
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She said yes. No great surprise, considering we've been dating for so long, but . On the other hand, her parents are from families of 8 and 9. Limiting just to aunts, uncles, and first cousins results in about 200 people for her side alone, no family friends. This is gonna be fun. 
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May 8, 2010 19:53
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How would one go about avoiding the poor house when buying a ring? I just can't seem to find a middle ground between not being cheap and still being able to pay rent. Tell me what is acceptable in this situation.
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May 10, 2010 12:03
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For me, the answer was moissanite. I was against the idea of my now-husband spending an exorbitant amount of money on my ring, but preferred the look of more expensive pieces. Plus, the whole  side of it appealed to us on a nerdy level (and the face that it was first discovered in a meteor crash in our state). Moissanite is almost as hard as diamond, and is more refractory. I love how my ring sparkles! It looks a lot like this one and is also 1.5 carats, but I think my band is slightly narrower in comparison to the stone. I believe Mr. FITD paid about that much for it as well.
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May 10, 2010 14:00
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Who ever decided a surprise wedding shower was a good idea? I thought I was going to have lunch with my folks and didn't bother changing out of my dirt-covered gym clothes. But no, all my and my fiance's female relatives were there with cameras  Also who ever thought that many women in one room was a good idea. Nothing like 30+ women arguing over whether it's safe for me to have another cookie. It was a 50/50 split whether or not it would affect my wedding dress. It was worth it for the awesome gifts (including my great grandmother's cocktail recipe book).
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May 10, 2010 14:06
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Abbeh posted:Also who ever thought that many women in one room was a good idea. Nothing like 30+ women arguing over whether it's safe for me to have another cookie. It was a 50/50 split whether or not it would affect my wedding dress. Jesus. Uh, congrats on surviving it?
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May 10, 2010 14:29
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Fire In The Disco posted:For me, the answer was moissanite. I was against the idea of my now-husband spending an exorbitant amount of money on my ring, but preferred the look of more expensive pieces. Plus, the whole I got my fiancee's ring from here. It came in ten days and was perfect. http://www.moissaniteco.com/
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May 10, 2010 14:46
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Vital Signs posted:How would one go about avoiding the poor house when buying a ring? I just can't seem to find a middle ground between not being cheap and still being able to pay rent. Tell me what is acceptable in this situation. I'd really recommend that the ring size/cost come about through a discussion of expectations with your fiance. It's a sad situation when the execution doesn't meet the expectation - I've seen couples married for 30 years where the wife was still upset that her engagement ring wasn't what she wanted. I often see a lot of "Oh no, I don't want diamond" because the woman wants to get engaged (and doesn't want to wait for her fiance to save up for a diamond)... but most times they would have preferred a diamond. Though every person is different. Your mileage may vary. I also see a lot of young women who say "don't spend a fortune" because they are already planning on the expenditures that go with homes and children. That said, shoot me a PM/Email. I have a few diamonds/gems that I'll be putting on clearance this week.
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May 10, 2010 15:10
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2 months salary is the standard, right? I know that's marketing bullshit but it's a good way to figure out the average. The thing with diamonds is that they are a very hard stone that can handle being worn daily for the rest of her life, so if you choose another type of stone, be sure it isn't so soft it's going to chip. Personally I love Art Deco, so I'd be really excited about a vintage ring or a ring that's made from a bunch of tiny gems rather than one huge diamond solitaire. You could explore options for paying the ring over time, instead of all up front. No woman expects you to immediately put 4 paychecks towards a diamond ring without paying rent or food, but if you don't have savings, putting 1/12th your salary for a year or two towards paying off the ring after you've bought it might not be out of the question. I'd also explore the family stone option, ask both her parents and your parents if there's any heirloom jewelry they'd like to pass on to your fiance. Plus it's a god conversation starter for the arcane "asking for their blessing" ritual.
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May 10, 2010 15:33
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JohnnyRnR posted:I'd really recommend that the ring size/cost come about through a discussion of expectations with your fiance. It's a sad situation when the execution doesn't meet the expectation - I've seen couples married for 30 years where the wife was still upset that her engagement ring wasn't what she wanted.
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May 10, 2010 16:06
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Can anyone recommend me a good place or website to go to where I can order decently priced invitations?
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May 10, 2010 17:10
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If you or anyone you know is decent at desktop publishing, you can save a poo poo-ton by printing your own. Mr. FITD did ours in Photoshop and they turned out gorgeously, very elegant and professional looking.
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May 10, 2010 17:14
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Vital Signs posted:How would one go about avoiding the poor house when buying a ring? I just can't seem to find a middle ground between not being cheap and still being able to pay rent. Tell me what is acceptable in this situation. PopRocks posted:2 months salary is the standard, right? I know that's marketing bullshit but it's a good way to figure out the average.
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May 10, 2010 17:41
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Ms. Happiness posted:Can anyone recommend me a good place or website to go to where I can order decently priced invitations? I bought some blanks on sale at a craft store, and I'm taking them to the university printing program. A friend did the same and she paid about fifty bucks for printing. Worth looking into, ay?
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May 10, 2010 19:21
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Would you just take them to a printing company after you get the design? I know next to nothing about photoshop but I could always ask my sister to design something. Thanks for the advice!
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May 10, 2010 20:20
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Ms. Happiness posted:Would you just take them to a printing company after you get the design? I know next to nothing about photoshop but I could always ask my sister to design something. Thanks for the advice! Absolutely! Our invitations were designed by my fiance's mom, and we're having them printed at FedEx. We have a design that will look lovely on a linen finish paper and we want it to have the casual feel that we'll get by going this route. We had our save the date cards done there, and they turned out absolutely amazing. If you wanted greater paper choices or any special printing, like metallic ink or embossing or the like, you could take it to a professional stationer's and they'd be able to help you out.
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May 10, 2010 20:34
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Ms. Happiness posted:Would you just take them to a printing company after you get the design? I know next to nothing about photoshop but I could always ask my sister to design something. Thanks for the advice! After my husband made the design, we printed them at home on the laser printer. You could definitely take them to a copy shop though. We had our programs printed at Office Max after my husband designed them. We bought the invitations kit, on linen paper, on sale at either Office something-or-other or Michael's.
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May 10, 2010 21:13
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We're using seeded paper and printing our own with a nice font. I hope the fact that you can plant the paper afterwards negates the need for it to be fancy, plus that's 50 invitations from just one packet of paper if you cut them in half.
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May 10, 2010 21:18
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I made my invitations for pretty cheap, and they were gorgeous. I used paper with pressed petals and leaves, and a vellum overlay. I printed on the vellum using my ink jet printer at home. I think 100 invites cost us somewhere around $90. I made response postcards by bonding card stock to the petal paper, and printed those at home as well.
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May 11, 2010 00:03
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Vital Signs posted:How would one go about avoiding the poor house when buying a ring? I just can't seem to find a middle ground between not being cheap and still being able to pay rent. Tell me what is acceptable in this situation. I went on etsy, and discovered a jeweler who does work with recycled materials, and was able to source a chatham lab-created alexandrite for me. So much cheaper than going to a jewelry store to get a diamond ring, and much more unique to me
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May 11, 2010 08:23
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Lingling posted:I went on etsy, and discovered a jeweler who does work with recycled materials, and was able to source a chatham lab-created alexandrite for me. So much cheaper than going to a jewelry store to get a diamond ring, and much more unique to me On another note, I've been looking at the vintage page listed in the OP. I think that is something that she would really enjoy, as her undergrad is a double in history and geography, and her masters she is working on now is in historical preservation. So a ring from the past sounds perfect for her. Does anyone know how hard it is to have vintage rings like that resized, or how much a jeweler will charge? She is a bit on the smaller side, so not many of them are a size 5.
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May 11, 2010 08:58
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I have an appointment tonight with a diamond wholesaler here in Vancouver (http://www.luksusdiamonds.com/). I'm looking for an Asscher cut diamond at around 1 carat. Does anyone have any advice. I've only ever looked at diamonds in regular stores. Thanks.
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May 11, 2010 19:46
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JohnnyRnR posted:That said, shoot me a PM/Email. I have a few diamonds/gems that I'll be putting on clearance this week.
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May 11, 2010 22:05
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Anyone have any recommendations for a semi private beach wedding ceremony in southern Florida/keys for about 20 people? I'm looking for something within several hours of driving distance to Ft. Lauderdale so that we can take a cruise for a honeymoon. For the reception, I'm not sure what we are doing yet. I have a few ideas such as a dinner cruise.
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May 12, 2010 04:29
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Rhaegar posted:I have an appointment tonight with a diamond wholesaler here in Vancouver (http://www.luksusdiamonds.com/). I'm looking for an Asscher cut diamond at around 1 carat. Does anyone have any advice. I've only ever looked at diamonds in regular stores. Rhaegar, looks like I'm too late to give you any advice but please feel free to post the details on the stones you're comparing if you have any questions.
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May 12, 2010 04:52
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