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There's a guy in my office with a hand-powered coffee grinder. For the first week that I worked here, I thought he was sharpening like fifty pencils every morning. Then one day I walked by his cube and saw what he was really doing. He brings a bag of coffee beans, dumps them in his grinder and goes to town on and off for thirty minutes to an hour. I spend most of my time with headphones on, so it's not that annoying. Just a little weird and not very productive. Aren't there much better ways to get coffee? I don't drink the stuff, so I'm not familiar.
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Dec 14, 2012 02:13
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Bloodnose posted:There's a guy in my office with a hand-powered coffee grinder. For the first week that I worked here, I thought he was sharpening like fifty pencils every morning. Then one day I walked by his cube and saw what he was really doing. He brings a bag of coffee beans, dumps them in his grinder and goes to town on and off for thirty minutes to an hour. Edit: Not if he grinds the whole bag of beans in advance though.
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Dec 14, 2012 02:17
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I haven't been watching him that closely, but it can't be the whole bag in advance. He grinds every morning. Unless he's drinking a crazy amount of coffee. I actually don't know how much a bag of beans makes, but I assume it's a lot.
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Dec 14, 2012 02:19
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Bloodnose posted:I haven't been watching him that closely, but it can't be the whole bag in advance. He grinds every morning. Unless he's drinking a crazy amount of coffee. I actually don't know how much a bag of beans makes, but I assume it's a lot.
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Dec 14, 2012 02:28
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Nocheez posted:My boss used to give me lovely reviews because I had teammates that weren't pulling their weight. Her reasoning was that we were on the same team, so I should have been helping them. She didn't care that the numbers I personally was responsible for were great, and that I had proof (e-mails, etc) where I had offered to help out/train my teammates on things they were struggling with. This one is nice, instead of doing her job properly where she trains, motivates and monitors people, she blaims others when she does not do her own job right. People with this kind of logic will never be swayed, by whatever argument you put on the table. The thing about stock-price related performance reviews, will praising reviews be passed when the stock prices are up? Or will you then be judged on your personal merit again as "we have to adapt to the new times"?
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Dec 17, 2012 12:30
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Keetron posted:
I think everyone who has ever worked in a callcenter knows the answer.
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Dec 17, 2012 13:03
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Nocheez posted:My boss used to give me lovely reviews because I had teammates that weren't pulling their weight. Her reasoning was that we were on the same team, so I should have been helping them. She didn't care that the numbers I personally was responsible for were great, and that I had proof (e-mails, etc) where I had offered to help out/train my teammates on things they were struggling with. My husband once had a manager who believed that her performance could be indicated by her employees' performance. She was personally invested in the development of her employees and felt that she was responsible for their success in the workplace. If they were failing she took that as a challenge to help them succeed and put the right processes in place and actually support the employee to improve. He's usually trustworthy, but I do wonder if this person rode a pink unicorn to work.
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Dec 17, 2012 15:31
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I have a manager like that! She's kind of a newbie though.
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Dec 17, 2012 17:48
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I made the classic newbie mistake of being good at my job so they just fired our department underperformer and gave me her work too. I should have paid more attention to Dilbert 
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Dec 19, 2012 07:45
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Epoxy Bulletin posted:I made the classic newbie mistake of being good at my job so they just fired our department underperformer and gave me her work too. I should have paid more attention to Dilbert Continue being awesome at the new responsibilities, and in a few months ask for a title bump, raise, or both. If they're unwilling to budge, start looking for another position that matches your new responsibilities, and see if you can get closer to market rate.
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Dec 20, 2012 21:14
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I just found out my company has a snack allowance. About $7 a week. That could be fun. 
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Dec 21, 2012 02:05
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Keetron posted:The thing about stock-price related performance reviews, will praising reviews be passed when the stock prices are up? Or will you then be judged on your personal merit again as "we have to adapt to the new times"? Management still went to the board and got nice bonuses for getting the company out of debt by taking out another, bigger loan with a different institution. 
Seat Safety Switch fucked around with this message at 18:48 on Dec 21, 2012 |
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Dec 21, 2012 18:45
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The directors of quality assurance and regulatory affairs have been lying to European regulatory agencies for years, saying that we're going to go from a manual system to a computerized system. Now it's been too long, and if we aren't computerized by next year, our company won't be able to sell to our biggest/highest paying customer. Computerization has been in the works for years, but they've been getting nowhere. Sitting in on conference calls is less productive than smashing my skull in with a hammer. Everyone at the corporate level acts like big babies. One of the guys who is like the #2 in RA will say things like, "I don't care, do whatever you want. My opinion obviously doesn't matter." Other people will sit there and call other people idiots. They all act like bratty children. We're one of the smallest companies in our industry, and I wouldn't be surprised if we're bought out. It doesn't help that we're being sued by the company who was previously creating our computer program for breach of contract.
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Dec 22, 2012 17:03
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Holy crap that is a lot of words for "I should get the gently caress out of here immediately" That's the Titanic, only instead of the Band Conductor saying "it's been an honor" and playing as the boat goes down, he goatses the band from his podium
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Dec 23, 2012 21:23
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I have 74 hours of vacation leave with 2 work days remaining in the year. I decide to take those two days off. I email my boss, who replies with a copy of my self-evaluation and says I need to fill it out on my day off. This is the self evaluation for an annual review which was supposed to be August. Four months that fucker had to give it to me. Four loving months and he gives it to me on my day off. As is evident by my leave balance, I don't get a lot of time off. My work is so hosed. And one of their "core values"? "Respect our Employees". Bite my loving rear end you pieces of poo poo. 
me your dad fucked around with this message at 12:26 on Dec 28, 2012 |
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Dec 28, 2012 12:13
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me your dad posted:I have 74 hours of vacation leave with 2 work days remaining in the year. I decide to take those two days off. I email my boss, who replies with a copy of my self-evaluation and says I need to fill it out on my day off. I would just get a .jpeg and rename it the same as the evaluation file with a .pdf extension and send it back. They come back to you tomorrow saying "hey, that file didn't work" and you go "oh no worries, I'll do it again for you now".
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Dec 28, 2012 12:19
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Omgbees posted:I would just get a .jpeg and rename it the same as the evaluation file with a .pdf extension and send it back. That's the most brilliant idea I've ever heard that would be an excellent solution to almost any problem in the world.
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Dec 28, 2012 12:46
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You can also save the file as a .pfd which will break the poo poo out of it and do the same thing
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Dec 28, 2012 12:49
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The more I think about this situation, the more pissed off I get. It briefly crossed my mind to flat out refuse, telling him I'm on VACATION and that I'll complete it when I come back to the office to WORK on Wednesday. I believe that will pose a problem though because he's obviously under pressure to get it done before the end of the year. Such horse poo poo. I was looking forward to a nice day off too. Now I get to spend it fuming. EDIT - I think I'm going to do the review to fulfill my end of this nonsense, and when I return to work on Wednesday I'll talk to HR. EDIT 2 - It took all of ten minutes to do, but that fucker is going to receive it at 4:50 PM today. me your dad fucked around with this message at 18:57 on Dec 28, 2012 |
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Dec 28, 2012 13:47
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What I like is the ones where they send out emails to everyone in the company saying "ALL training MUST be accomplished BEFORE THE END OF THE MONTH. If you haven't done your training then DO IT NOW." Training! It's vitally important to operations! So important that they apparently have no way to tell whether you've done it or not.
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Dec 30, 2012 02:21
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Miss-Bomarc posted:What I like is the ones where they send out emails to everyone in the company saying "ALL training MUST be accomplished BEFORE THE END OF THE MONTH. If you haven't done your training then DO IT NOW." We had this at an old job of mine. We were predominantly a pipeline (regulated) company with a growing E&P division (non-regulated) that has since been spun off. Every year around this time we would get panicked emails from compliance about completing FERC training. There was also a 90 minute video we had to watch about records retention. But there was no way to tell if the video had actually been watched or just played completely. So I would just start the video playing, mute it, and minimize the window. Then I would just go back to doing my usual work.
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Dec 30, 2012 02:34
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ch3cooh posted:...there was no way to tell if the video had actually been watched or just played completely. So I would just start the video playing, mute it, and minimize the window. Then I would just go back to doing my usual work. To their credit, they don't pretend that this is anything but a measure to insulate the company from lawsuits should you be overheard saying "oval office", "gun", or "friend of the family" on company property. (Or get caught bribing a government official to let you do your job properly, even though that's the expected procedure in any country that doesn't have English or German as the de facto national language.)
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Dec 30, 2012 03:49
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Miss-Bomarc posted:Yeah, that's pretty much what we do. They did get wise to that, though, and now you have to click on a "continue" button every so often or it times out and you have to do the whole thing again. Pretesting out of training is the best. The worst was having to precisely recreate a ~15 element pyramid diagram of the LEAN fundamentals after 6 hours of slides (or 25 minutes of fast clicking).
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Dec 30, 2012 06:53
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Miss-Bomarc posted:Yeah, that's pretty much what we do. They did get wise to that, though, and now you have to click on a "continue" button every so often or it times out and you have to do the whole thing again. Yep. Used to be a trainer. The stockholders, licensing board or government want to see that you've "trained" all of your employees in anti - workplace violence/sexual harassment/business integrity. Therefore if you do those things, it's because you're a bad person who went against his/her training and the company can't be sued. Also, the sexual harassment victims can't sue the company (unless something really egregious has gone on where the company purposely covered it up) as part of a harassment suit.
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Dec 30, 2012 16:49
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I've been trolling through job ads on craigslist for the last year or so and just came across the most astoundingly creative (for lack of a better word) corporate job title that I have ever seen. Director of First Impressions Its a job ad for a receptionist. At least one friend has confirmed that her company (completely separate and different company) unironically uses this title. 
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Dec 31, 2012 18:04
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Title inflation is one of the most asinine things about business today. It gets to the point where you don't even know what the hell you're applying for.
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Dec 31, 2012 18:21
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Analysts, analysts everywhere. And coordinators.
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Dec 31, 2012 18:30
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I was applying for a job once and they changed the title in the middle of when I was writing the cover letter. I went to submit and it said it was for an Editorial Project Manager instead of a Publications Coordinator (oslt). Had to go back and redo all mentions of the title in my letter before I submitted
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Dec 31, 2012 18:41
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ladyweapon posted:I've been trolling through job ads on craigslist for the last year or so and just came across the most astoundingly creative (for lack of a better word) corporate job title that I have ever seen. I would so apply for that job, do it for a year then apply for a real directors job someplace and lie on my resume. Just to see what would happen.
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Dec 31, 2012 21:56
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My "official" title is Design Engineer. I have absolutely zero engineering training. It's just so that the investors think we employ more engineers than we actually do.
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Dec 31, 2012 22:12
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Aquatic Giraffe posted:My "official" title is Design Engineer. Depending on the day of the week or the current star aligment, I could be called an UX or UI Designer, Information Architect, Usability Engineer (nope, no engeneering degree) or any random mix of these words, with a splash of "evangelist" and/or "guru".
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Jan 1, 2013 02:22
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In Hong Kong, anything with 'executive' in the title will have a poverty salary.
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Jan 2, 2013 01:55
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Sometimes I suspect that this entire organization is composed of Project Managers.
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Jan 2, 2013 02:11
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A coworker of mine got screwed over recently. The backstory is that after a reorganization, my section got taken off of customer service and his got put on it in our place. He'd never worked the customer service desk and was going to be the coordinator, so (as the outgoing expert) I trained him up on all the things that needed to be done and how we did them. For a year after the switch officially took place, I'd get idiotic phonecalls from him wondering how to do the same things. Yes dude, they have to fill out that form. No, we don't need that other thing stapled to it, we have a .pdf of it already, save the paper. A full loving year. And then the (to me) unbelievable happened. He got better at his job. It wasn't until six months went by without a call that I realized it. And he keeps getting better. Over the past three years since this, I've established a really good working relationship with him and I can honestly say I'm proud of him for the job he does. Then one of the senior staff, this guy's immediate boss, leaves. Naturally he applies to fill the vacancy. Surprise, surprise, he gets chosen! But there's a catch. He doesn't get a pay raise or the title. He keeps his old title, gets the additional responsibilities, and gets shuffled underneath an already existing senior staff post. In his exact words: "I guess they just don't trust me enough for some reason." What the gently caress?
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Jan 2, 2013 14:13
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ItalicSquirrels posted:A coworker of mine got screwed over recently. The backstory is that after a reorganization, my section got taken off of customer service and his got put on it in our place. He'd never worked the customer service desk and was going to be the coordinator, so (as the outgoing expert) I trained him up on all the things that needed to be done and how we did them. For a year after the switch officially took place, I'd get idiotic phonecalls from him wondering how to do the same things. Yes dude, they have to fill out that form. No, we don't need that other thing stapled to it, we have a .pdf of it already, save the paper. A full loving year. The joys of getting hosed over. I slipped on some ice coming into work today and went through a some drywall. I spent two hours filling out forms 
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Jan 2, 2013 15:37
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WOOO! Just got an offer that not only is 9% raise over what I currently make, but will actually allow me to practice my skillset (engineering) as opposed to the admin assistant bs I currently do. Announcing my resignation tomorrow. It's going to be especially sweet, as my gf and coworker announced her resignation one week ago. God I cannot wait to leave.
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Jan 3, 2013 19:26
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NomNomNom posted:WOOO! Just got an offer that not only is 9% raise over what I currently make, but will actually allow me to practice my skillset (engineering) as opposed to the admin assistant bs I currently do. Announcing my resignation tomorrow. It's going to be especially sweet, as my gf and coworker announced her resignation one week ago. God I cannot wait to leave. You sound like what's hopefully me in about 3 months! (Electrical engineer working as project admin still) Congrats man.
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Jan 4, 2013 02:32
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It is done. Wasn't easy, despite their many, many, many failings, they were genuinely nice people who had my interests at heart. Not going to stop me from posting some of the hilarity that went on here. I'm working on a big post.
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Jan 4, 2013 14:22
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Some guy just emailed a regional (like, EMEA type of regional) LoB distribution list asking to be included in it. So that's at least about a thousand people who have nothing to do with managing the distribution lists. Also, at about 250 words, his message was about 85% signature. However, I have to say that to our organization's credit,
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Jan 7, 2013 10:49
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mobby_6kl posted:Some guy just emailed a regional (like, EMEA type of regional) LoB distribution list asking to be included in it. So that's at least about a thousand people who have nothing to do with managing the distribution lists. Also, at about 250 words, his message was about 85% signature. What's in his signature? Why is it so long?
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Jan 7, 2013 22:50
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