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The two studios we looked at offer that, but when I spoke with each of them, it sounded more like the free "lesson" was more of a consultation toward future lessons. We bring in some songs, they listen to them, talk about what kind of dance would be best. Only thirty minutes and it didn't sound like there would be much dancing. Maybe we'll still give it a go, see what happens at the free lesson before committing.
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May 27, 2010 18:35
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We always wanted to learn to dance, so we made a concerted effort to pick up lindy hop. we've been practicing quite a bit and are doing pretty decently, but it remains to be seen if we can keep up with our song. Nobody on earth knows about this, and everyone fully expects us to slowly rock around in circles like prom. With any luck, jaws will drop.
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May 28, 2010 01:52
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Abbeh posted:Nine days! I hear that's common when it gets close to W-Day. It's kinda weird, neither my fiance nor I are really stressed about this. Whenever I think about the wedding, I just mellow out. I'm calm, collected, and utterly relaxed. He just can't wait for it and is getting anxious. We're like the complete opposite of what I thought we would be at this point. I think it's helping that my mantra right now is "Nothing else matters." We have the big things set, the bills are almost all paid. Everything else is just the little details, and if they're not perfect, the only one who will care is me. So why stress? We're getting married, and nothing else matters  I say this now and tomorrow we've got a 7 hour long road trip. We're gonna kill each other.
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May 28, 2010 01:54
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I went to my best friend's engagement party on saturday and he asked me to be his best man! The wedding is in October, but I'm already feeling nervous, as I've never been in a bridal party and can't even remember the last wedding I went to.. I have a few questions about it: Bucks/bachelor party: We're in Melbourne Australia, and I'm gauging on costs.. am I supposed to pay for the whole party myself? If not.. who do I bother for money? How much do I organize with the groom and how much do I organize on my own? Wedding: From what I understand.. my job is to make sure the wedding goes smoothly.. what does this include exactly? I want to make their day memorable in a unique kind of way but don't really know how to do this without stealing the spotlight.. can anyone think of any times the best man had an awesome surprise up his sleeve? Pre wedding: How available do I need to be for wedding rehearsals and generally spending time with the bridal party before the wedding? I live about an hour and a half's drive from the bride and groom. Would I be intruding on the happy couple if I spent a weekend or two a month with the groom leading up with to the wedding? I moved states for 2 years and only recently come back, and I haven't been able to spend as much time with him as I like since I moved back. Little bit of background: The groom, bride and I are all in our early twenties.. we've known each other since we were babies. He has about 7 friends who he wants to bring to the bucks party, all of which are good guys. From what I understand it's going to be a wedding of around 100 people. Thanks guys!
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May 31, 2010 06:26
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My answers are based on the wedding I attended on Saturday and how they did it. This is in the USA, so ignore custom differences as appropriate. Bucks/bachelor party: We're in Melbourne Australia, and I'm gauging on costs.. am I supposed to pay for the whole party myself? If not.. who do I bother for money? How much do I organize with the groom and how much do I organize on my own? You're supposed to organize it, get people on-board for it, make sure it goes smoothly (or not smoothly if intended). How much say the groom has in things really depends on your relationship with the groom, if he's unsure about certain things (such as the topic of strippers, which will start a huge debate that is entirely unnecessary in the thread). Payment is often divided among the groomsmen attending the bachelor party, but NOT THE GROOM. If possible, don't even let him know how much you paid. That being said, if you're the best man you should expect to be paying more than the others. Something will go wrong, someone will be short on money, etc etc, and since things going smoothly is your job, don't be surprised if you have to pick up extra on the tab. From what I understand.. my job is to make sure the wedding goes smoothly.. what does this include exactly? I want to make their day memorable in a unique kind of way but don't really know how to do this without stealing the spotlight.. can anyone think of any times the best man had an awesome surprise up his sleeve? I don't have any answers here in terms of what to do AT the wedding, because that's going to depend on how the wedding itself is actually planned, secular vs religious, etc etc, but it also warrants note that there's a good chance (clearly I don't know the couple so grain of salt here!) that most of the 'plan' for the wedding is done by the bride and her parents, less so from the groom. Be careful with unique stuff and make sure you understand how the wedding is going to go / expectations from the bride's side of things before you try anything cool. Pre wedding: How available do I need to be for wedding rehearsals and generally spending time with the bridal party before the wedding? I live about an hour and a half's drive from the bride and groom. There was only one rehearsal for the wedding I was just at. If your wedding is intending to have more than one, I don't know what to tell you. You definitely should be at the wedding rehearsal, and 1.5 hours is really nothing in terms of that. To put it a different way... the Maid of Honor for Saturday's wedding made it to the rehearsals in spite of it requiring an 18-hour plane flight. Typically you aren't quite as important as the MoH, but it's a parallel role on the groom's side. Other than the rehearsals, you should expect to be around for the preparatory work in the day or two leading up to the wedding, depending on how much preparatory work there is. You and the groomsmen (potentially with you kinda organizing the labor from them) should be helping out with setting up chairs, reception area, and being manly manual labor unless you've been told otherwise. Make yourselves available. Also, if the couple's parents still do the old custom of "bride and groom can't see each other until ceremony on wedding day", expect to play messenger-boy quite a bit to wherever the bride's family is staying. Would I be intruding on the happy couple if I spent a weekend or two a month with the groom leading up with to the wedding? I moved states for 2 years and only recently come back, and I haven't been able to spend as much time with him as I like since I moved back. I have no clue on this one, sorry. It's going to depend on the couple, the insanity leading up to the wedding (there always is some craziness whenever you try to get 100 people together in one place), and what the groom has time for of course. I personally wouldn't object to it, especially since you can squeeze in wedding questions at the same time and gauge what he's expecting from you too.
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May 31, 2010 13:29
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Aaaaah no turning back now; we just sent out our invitations! The cover:  Our monogram:  We printed everything on what FedEx calls "Natural" cardstock, a lovely cream color. And it looks amazing. The color of the cardstock made the green and brown pop a little bit. It's been really hard for me to keep from falling into the "industry" side of things now that it's so close to the wedding. (One of things I wanted to make sure of was that I wasn't doing something just because you "had" to.) We seriously had a long conversation last night about just how many different types of candy to include in our favors. (Chocolate bars? Jolly Ranchers? Buttermints? Andes mints?) Thank goodness The World's Greatest Fiance reminded me that we shouldn't be trying to please everybody, so we're going to keep it simple - Lime and Coconut Jelly Bellies and that's it.
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May 31, 2010 18:24
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How did everyone go about finding a caterer for their wedding? I know I'm going to have around 100 people at the reception and the wedding will probably be around 3pm in the afternoon. Fiance and I are thinking of just having a sort of light lunch buffet with sandwiches, fruit tray, no alcohol, etc. How much should we be expect to be paying per person?
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May 31, 2010 20:49
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We're doing something similar and paying about £8 per head, including the use of crockery and such and clean-up afterwards. We just asked the local cafes (all two of them) and got lucky with somebody who was really helpful, did good food, and didn't get snooty when I said I was doing the desserts myself.
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May 31, 2010 22:14
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http://www.katieslaterphotography.com/blog/ This is our photographer! And we are Jen and Dana. My fiance works sometimes with a wedding studio so she looked really hard for a good shooter and if the engagement shots are any clue, I'll be very happy.
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May 31, 2010 22:32
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vanessa posted:Aaaaah no turning back now; we just sent out our invitations!
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Jun 1, 2010 01:56
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Lord Hawking posted:Wow, that's awesome advance notice! We'll be sending ours out next weekend for a July 31st wedding. Love your design! My cousin is getting married June 25...we needed to send them out early enough before her wedding so that we weren't infringing on her attention because sending them after would be too late to track down people who forgot to RSVP. I say at least this way, people will have plenty of time to think of their excuses! Future mom-in-law did the design. I'm so glad to be marrying into this family.
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Jun 1, 2010 05:17
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oh god oh god three weeks left how did this ring get on finger i'm not good at wedding June 19th! Fiancee and I are self-financing, with a generous grant from my (groom's) side and viewers like you. We kept the costs to just under $20k, with an all-expenses-paid honeymoon to Jamaica included. Since we've both plowed through this nightmare from start to finish together, on our own, and it looks like we're going to come out marginally debt free ($1.5k will still be hanging over us), here's some tips. Some obvious, some not.
Obviously the "dumb stuff" is not dumb if it's deeply meaningful/has always been your dream, and you should pursue it at all costs if it is. But, be willing to look yourself in the mirror for each and every thing going into the ceremony and ask if it's vanity or happiness pushing you to get it. If it's vanity then tell it to  ! Trust me, not having debt will make your household much happier than a five minute ride behind a smelly horse.
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Jun 1, 2010 15:22
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We just took a look at the venue we are planning on using- http://cozyweddingsofgilbert.com/page/16u0n/Photos.html It's a max of 50 guests and kind of small but I like it. It was really pretty and the lady that runs the place seems both competent and laid back/flexible. For what we want to do- reception with barbeque from a place we like, nice cake, alcoholic beverages (no hard liquor though) and a pretty setting we're looking at about $4000. She wants $3000 for the venue, officiant+ceremony, set up, cake, flowers, decorations, photographer, etc. Our caterer would be $500 and the beverages should be about $400. We get to supply and serve our own. I'm so excited! I think this is going to happen!
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Jun 1, 2010 21:53
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dopaMEAN posted:We just took a look at the venue we are planning on using- http://cozyweddingsofgilbert.com/page/16u0n/Photos.html Nono...it's not small, it's cozy. And so cute! That's going to be a wonderful place to have a wedding. I'm so jealous, though, I wish we could get away with only inviting 50 people! Curse our grandparents for having lots of babies.
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Jun 1, 2010 22:11
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vanessa posted:Nono...it's not small, it's cozy. I feel really good about moving out of state next week, I think this place is exactly what I want. My grandparents had lots of babies too, thankfully they're all in another state. My family will be my mother. The fiance has both parents, sisters, and maybe an aunt and two grandparents. Other than that it's just our friends!
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Jun 2, 2010 03:49
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Also, that venue gives us a great excuse for not inviting cousins we haven't seen in 10 years. "Oh, we'd just love to have you come out, but our venue is too small and cozy! What a shame!"
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Jun 4, 2010 07:17
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Has anyone gotten married in Maryland and had an officiant that was not a "real" clergy member do the wedding? We want our friend to do the officiating, but Maryland doesn't allow someone to become a "justic of the peace" for a day or something like that. It's clergy members or a judge. But their definition of clergy seems to be pretty broad...as far as I can figure out, they don't require someone to actually have a real church and following, it just says that it's allowed as long as doing marriage ceremonies is something that's allowed by the "church" the clergy belongs to. So it would seem that you could do one of those online churches and that would work. But I'm wondering if anyone has actually done that or knows the rules better. Thanks
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Jun 4, 2010 15:39
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Levitate posted:Has anyone gotten married in Maryland and had an officiant that was not a "real" clergy member do the wedding? If you go to the website for the Universal Life Church, which is where our friend is getting ordained to marry us (in Missouri), they have a forum where I'm sure someone would know. If it doesn't work out you could always just have the wedding/reception with your friend officiating and then go to the courthouse the next day to sign the papers and make it "official."
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Jun 4, 2010 17:50
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I posted earlier about the order I placed through DNL for my engagement ring. I got it in the other day and was expecting to be disappointed. I might actually keep it though. It's pretty sparkly and doesn't look cloudy like the pictures in that thread the person directed me to. I'm just going to take good care of it until we can afford to get real diamonds.
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Jun 4, 2010 22:40
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SQUEE! I'm all married and stuff now!! We couldn't have asked for a more perfect weekend. The weather was perfect though, the people who did come had a great time, everyone in the wedding party got along amazingly, and the quality and quantity of pictures makes me very happy. Everyone was telling me the venue was beautiful, the food was great (it was when I finally had a chance to taste it), and after the ceremony and reception were over, it got even better - us, our wedding party, younger family members, and friends went to a local place with laser tag, go karts, mini golf and an arcade and had a blast until we closed the place down. We had a surprisingly high amount of no-shows at the event, but we got to keep the food since we did a buffet. Those of us left had some of the sandwiches and pasta sides for lunch today. Abbeh, I hope your wedding day went as wonderfully as ours did. Nione posted:If you go to the website for the Universal Life Church, which is where our friend is getting ordained to marry us (in Missouri), they have a forum where I'm sure someone would know. Levitate, this is what hubby and I did, except we did the official stuff the day before (June 4th). It was actually really nice. We got the ceremony we wanted, and were able to have just a small intimate setting for the actual marriage with our family and wedding party.
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Jun 7, 2010 04:30
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Apologies to anyone trying to email me this past week. I've been at a jewelry show putting together a rockin' product line for the Christmas season. Very exciting.
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Jun 7, 2010 17:47
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What's the best cash registry? I'm having a hell of time finding stuff to register for, and this seems like the best solution. Most of them like to take a bunch in fees however 
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Jun 7, 2010 20:59
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I'm looking to find a 4mm (or slimmer) simple black tungsten wedding ring for someone of ring size 5, does anyone have any suggestions of where I can find one that won't cost much money? We're not into the traditional expensive wedding ring thing.
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Jun 8, 2010 00:15
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Lenin Stimpy posted:I'm looking to find a 4mm (or slimmer) simple black tungsten wedding ring for someone of ring size 5, does anyone have any suggestions of where I can find one that won't cost much money? We're not into the traditional expensive wedding ring thing. How does $20-25 sound?
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Jun 8, 2010 10:29
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Got a consoltation with Buddy Valastro who makes awesome cakes. I'm so excited! I'm doing this behind my fiance's back as she was just going to take the default cake offered by the venue, but this should really surprise her as she loves that cake show.
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Jun 8, 2010 16:30
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That's awesome. You going to be on the show? 
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Jun 8, 2010 16:37
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LorneReams posted:What's the best cash registry? gross. just give people your paypal if that's what it comes down to.
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Jun 11, 2010 08:09
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scribe jones posted:gross. just give people your paypal if that's what it comes down to. I'm actually going with this I think: http://www.travelersjoy.com
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Jun 11, 2010 12:16
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LorneReams posted:I'm actually going with this I think: 7.5% seems like a lot of vig. you could just send everyone envelopes, or cancel the wedding and just buy a big metal bucket and spray-paint a dollar sign on it.
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Jun 11, 2010 21:47
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Yeah man, because there's not a recession on and everybody wants fine china. Lorne, a lot of people will give you flak for using a cash registry. I think it's a seriously stupid thing to consider tacky (I don't understand why mentioning a registry is tacky at all, actually; you give people presents at parties, no matter the occasion, so I don't know why a wedding should be different), but some people are really up their asses about wedding poo poo. Honeymoon registries have less of a stigma if you want to go for that (Honeyfund is a good one and it's free). I personally just registered on Amazon for a lot of things I could really use (I put on some plates and other traditional things, but I also registered for stuff I need for my dog), if you want to go that route.
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Jun 12, 2010 00:05
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scribe jones posted:7.5% seems like a lot of vig. you could just send everyone envelopes, or cancel the wedding and just buy a big metal bucket and spray-paint a dollar sign on it. That's plan B obv
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Jun 12, 2010 03:29
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Honestly, if you only register for a few items, then people who want to give you a gift will just give money once those items are gone. The ones who give you embroidered cat pillows or crystal bowls of doom would have given them no matter what! And then you don't have to worry about offending people or wasting their money on a website. Edit to say that at our wedding 2 weeks ago of about 380 guests, we had MAYBE 10 boxed gifts total... and that was with a registry that was used for the shower. In my part of the country, at least, people no longer bring gifts to the wedding, just envelopes. Ben Davis fucked around with this message at 03:55 on Jun 12, 2010 |
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Jun 12, 2010 03:52
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Yeah my problem was I told a few people I didn't want any gifts because I have too much poo poo already, but I was politely told by my parents that it's rude. I started then looking into Honeymoon registries so the people who really want to buy something can, except all the ones I found charge out the rear end, or are a pain in the rear end. this one at 7.5% didn't seem that bad as that's about what you'd pay in tax/shipping anyway.
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Jun 12, 2010 03:58
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LorneReams posted:Yeah my problem was I told a few people I didn't want any gifts because I have too much poo poo already, but I was politely told by my parents that it's rude. I started then looking into Honeymoon registries so the people who really want to buy something can, except all the ones I found charge out the rear end, or are a pain in the rear end. this one at 7.5% didn't seem that bad as that's about what you'd pay in tax/shipping anyway. you heard that telling people "no gifts" is rude... so you're doing a cash registry instead?
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Jun 12, 2010 04:45
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LorneReams posted:Yeah my problem was I told a few people I didn't want any gifts because I have too much poo poo already, but I was politely told by my parents that it's rude. No, it's rude to write "No gifts" or to put a list of where you're registered on the invitations because that implies that gifts are expected, and a good host or hostess would never expect anything of their guests other than to have a good time. I'm kind of in the same boat. We aren't registering anywhere, and I told both sets of parents that if anyone asked, they should say that all we honestly wanted was for people to come and enjoy themselves because it would be enough just to see people smiling. And really, that is all I want. Maybe I'm silly that way.
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Jun 12, 2010 05:15
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I pretty much just had to accept the fact that our families would most likely want to give us gifts no matter what so I should make it easier for them to feel like their gift is what we really need.
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Jun 12, 2010 06:12
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I think if you set up a small registry, even if it only has 15 items on it, that would help. Then you have something that your family can tell people. Once all the items have been purchased, I think most guests would be smart enough to just give cash. If you really don't want a registry, tell people who ask about it that you are hoping to replace the carpet in your house, save for a house, take a nice honeymoon, etc and that any gift they give would be greatly appreciated. That way they can give you a gift and you don't lose any of that money in fees. Anyone who is still pissed about you not having a registry or not having anything left on it is just silly.
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Jun 12, 2010 08:12
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vanessa posted:No, it's rude to write "No gifts" or to put a list of where you're registered on the invitations because that implies that gifts are expected, and a good host or hostess would never expect anything of their guests other than to have a good time. Not at all. That's all I wanted at my wedding. We requested no gifts from people when they asked and attached the reasoning of-we don't have a house. We have no idea where we'll be. I was moving out and my new husband was still in the barracks several thousand miles away. We had no way to get things there and nowhere to put them. We told them if they absolutely had to give us anything, they could give us a few dollars and we'd put it toward what they intended us to, or they could give us like.. gift certificates on amazon.com or wait until we had a place to store things. Noone complained, noone acted as if they thought it was tacky and we got a good bit of cash to go on our honeymoon with and set up house.
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Jun 12, 2010 09:20
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:We requested no gifts from people when they asked But that's the difference. Etiquette-wise, once people ask, you can tell them whatever you want. It's including it in the invitations/bringing it up first yourself that's out of manner. I see nothing wrong with asking for money once people ask. It's just that in our case, we really don't want anything material at all.
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Jun 12, 2010 14:54
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Can someone please recommend a mother-son dance song that's: a.) Not incredibly sappy b.) Not > like 3 minutes because I am a disastrous dancer and will likely break my poor mom's ankles The rest of the music list is taken care of and I'm planning on sending to the music person this evening. I don't know what kind of shameful music vendor doesn't have The Final Countdown, but I saw to it that the problem was rectified  edit: oh; someone was asking about Maryland wedding officiant stuff. Not sure how helpful this is (you might not be terribly close to VA; this is likely only useful if you're in the DC metro area), but VA has some crazy old-rear end law that if you're certified to practice law in Virginia, you can perform 1 wedding in your lifetime. Thus, you find one of your lawyer friends, have them do the documentation, and then have whoever you want to the actual "ceremony" at the wedding. FairGame fucked around with this message at 16:18 on Jun 14, 2010 |
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Jun 14, 2010 16:11
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