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Malcolm Excellent
May 20, 2007

Buglord

LadyPictureShow posted:

My stalker dad (47m) is seeing my sister-in-law (31f) and aiming to be my (27f) brother-in-law

Gross. Cut them all off

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Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



LadyPictureShow posted:

My stalker dad (47m) is seeing my sister-in-law (31f) and aiming to be my (27f) brother-in-law

:stare:

Not letting this soap opera languish at the end of a page

greazeball
Feb 4, 2003



I saw stalker dad story and decided to post something a little less hosed up. OP suspects him of having some kind of PI keep track of his estranged kids so he can keep gift agressioning them at appropriate moments. She's given fake info to her gran, the only family member that still has contact with both of them and he hasn't reacted to it. He managed to send her sibling a gift and call and complain about the DiSrEsPeCt one week after they changed their name. Sounds like a really hosed up situation.

The Maroon Hawk
May 10, 2008

LadyPictureShow posted:

My stalker dad (47m) is seeing my sister-in-law (31f) and aiming to be my (27f) brother-in-law

Jerry Springer’s ears are tingling, and he doesn’t (yet) know why

limp_cheese
Sep 10, 2007


Nothing to see here. Move along.

LadyPictureShow posted:

My stalker dad (47m) is seeing my sister-in-law (31f) and aiming to be my (27f) brother-in-law

his mother said that I knew him a decade ago as a father and sister knows him now as a boyfriend, so sister's impression of him is probably more accurate. 

Holy poo poo the galaxy brain on display here. Yes, the woman who has known him for less than a year and is blinded by love has a better understanding of this man than his daughter that he raised. Just.... wow.

Soylent Pudding
Jun 22, 2007

We've got people!


AITA for coordinating with my coworkers to quit on the same day?

quote:

I work at a local childcare center. It's a part time job that was supposed to be flexible enough to do while I also am going to college. But my coworkers and I are all pretty stressed because of a few things...

Our boss promised to work with our school or second-job schedules but she actually treats us as on-call and threatens us with being fired if we won't come in immediately, even if we have class, an exam, are at a second job, etc.

She is really condescending, she's an older woman and most of us employees are in our twenties. And she's always comparing us negatively to her teenage daughters and complaining about young people. It sounds petty but it gets demoralizing hearing often how her daughters have intelligence and a work ethic and none of us do.

I met her daughters, when she had them here to "work" and they were honestly more like additional children for us employees to mind than coworkers. They were lazy and priveledged and didn't get how someone might have to both be in college and work. They thought that us having jobs meant we just didn't care about college?? Like girlies, we need money! It was baffling to finally meet these girls with a legendary work ethic and realize that they didn't seem to have worked a day in their lifes.

But anyyyway, all 7 of us got to talking about getting other jobs. We all put each other down as references and helped each other write resumes and prep for interviews. And we all got offers!

I said, why don't we all resign on the same day? I didn't think it would work out logistically, but it actually did.

We were all getting more and more pissed at our boss because she kept on bringing her daughters in to "work" but like I said they were more like additional children to mind.

Well, last Monday morning, right after payday, we each sent a brief email like "I am writing to give my notice of resignation, effective immediately"

None of us added any details and we all decided to not answer her calls. And then, here's the loving wild part, she showed up TO MY DORM, LOOKING FOR ME!

That really solidified how she thought of her employees as children...

She yelled at me about how she knew we all quit together on purpose and that she had children dropped off and she had to send them home because she had no employees. I was feeling very petty saying "Oh, but you still have three! Your daughters! You're always talking about how they work twice as hard as anyone, I'm sure they'll be able to handle it. She said they had school and I quoted her words back saying that "Everyone has to make compromises, school can't always come first"

Of course that pissed her off because missing school for work is only something she'd ask of us, not her own kids...

She's really mad and I think losing clients because people are pissed off they had to make last minute childcare arrangements.

AITA for organizing a mass quitting?

The Bramble
Mar 16, 2004

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for coordinating with my coworkers to quit on the same day?

What's the rule these days? If I say something like "its nice to see a realstory about oppressed underlings banding together to ruin their McScrooge boss, plus have a witty reply on the tip of their tongue at just the right moment for a change!" will I not get probed?

Armitag3
Mar 15, 2020

Forget it Jake, it's cybertown.


You could always start a tipping derail if you really want to take a break

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Armitag3 posted:

You could always start a tipping derail if you really want to take a break

Personally I think we should just leave cows alone

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!


LadyPictureShow posted:

My stalker dad (47m) is seeing my sister-in-law (31f) and aiming to be my (27f) brother-in-law

sister's brain should be studied for science

Baronjutter
Dec 31, 2007

"Tiny Trains"

I had some friends who worked a horrible job like that right after university. Bunch of english and lit grads working in a publishing house that helped edit and publish self-published works. They had to deal with crazy "authors" all the time demanding they make their insane vanity projects into best sellers. The company owners made sure all the staff was right on the razor edge of part time so they didn't have to give benefits or follow a lot of regulations. The job paid like trash and the owners were horrible and would always make fun of their own staff for being idiot english grads who should have gotten a STEM degree if they wanted to make a living wage.

All of them decided to quit at the same time at the busiest time of the year, many didn't even have new jobs set up but they were so pissed after putting up with the owner's poo poo for a year. The owner lost their minds and actually tried to get the POLICE involved saying it was a coordinated attack on their business which surely must be criminal in some way. The police had to tell her that no, quitting a job isn't criminal. But she kept going on about how because they all quit together it was "criminal conspiracy".

The whole business had to shut down for a couple years due to this, but sadly she managed to claw her way back into operation and it still exists today taking advantage of recent english grads desperate for a first job in publishing.

PS
I forgot to mention that she was her own most prolific client. She'd always make everyone drop everything to get her own books out the door and whoever got stuck editing the boss's work was also stuck getting screamed at. She was a horrible writer, like barely elementary school level writing skills. When the editors would try to correct even minor grammar issues she would lose her poo poo and start ranting about how she used to TEACH creative writing and wasn't going to take criticism from some fresh out of college kid. Also the business could have actually turned a really good profit but the constant printing runs and editing time for the owner's garbage writing was a massive loss each year.

Zulily Zoetrope
Jun 1, 2011

Muldoon

LadyPictureShow posted:

My stalker dad (47m) is seeing my sister-in-law (31f) and aiming to be my (27f) brother-in-law

I remember a similar story from several threads ago where OP's in-laws got in contact with their estranged dad or brother, and kept trying to make OP get in contact with him, which OP staunchly refused to do. That one ended with the estrangee robbing the in-laws and they, of course, responded by hurling abuse at OP for not warning them that he was a bad dude.

Anyone else remember that one? I think it predates the thread archive, but it was a doozy.

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

Breetai posted:

Yeah nah. The kid has a history of violent outbursts and destructive behaviour, and I wouldn't introduce a cat into that environment in case the kid antagonizes it, the kitten hisses or swipes at the kid, and then the kid stomps its to death..

I wouldn't introduce the other kid into an environment where someone can just expect violent outbursts either though. :smith: It may be a bad idea to get that kitten, but even if they didn't, it'd be one more nice thing she just couldn't have because of her sibling.

these stories always depress me

Hughlander
May 11, 2005

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

I remember a similar story from several threads ago where OP's in-laws got in contact with their estranged dad or brother, and kept trying to make OP get in contact with him, which OP staunchly refused to do. That one ended with the estrangee robbing the in-laws and they, of course, responded by hurling abuse at OP for not warning them that he was a bad dude.

Anyone else remember that one? I think it predates the thread archive, but it was a doozy.

I vaguely remember it but couldn't find it when i went looking. I did find this one though...
AITA for kicking my in laws out??

quote:

My husband (25) and I (23 F) purchased our first home 6 months ago. A 4 bedroom home as we hope to have children soon. My mother in law (52) and father in law (51) are currently living with us for the last 3 months as they are having their home completely remodeled. I am a very private person and protective of my belongings as I grew up with 5 siblings and my stuff was always stolen so I make sure that I have my stuff and no one touches without asking. We have a lock on our bedroom door and we lock it when we leave each day because we’ll we have personal items and don’t need anyone snooping. I had cameras installed in the house because our neighbors house got broken into last month and if that were to happen to us I would want proof and to find out who it was so we had them installed. Well my husband and I left out of town for the weekend to get away and be alone. On our way home the camera in our bedroom notified us of movement and I was surprised as our room is locked so I looked at the footage and there’s my in laws going through my stuff and my mother in law threw away my “toys” and she ripped the sheets off our bed and she threw them into the restroom and ripped them up. (I don’t know why) and my father in law was throwing out my husband and my clothes from our drawers. My husband and I were furious. When we got home we saw our room and asked them why they would do this and they said that they were sure we were hiding that we were secretly pregnant and they wanted proof (ultrasound photos) to show their friends that they are going to be grandparents. I was furious and I told them to get out of our home and that they need to pay for the items that were damaged. They still haven’t apologized for their behavior or reimbursed us and I will not allow them into our home until they do . My husband agrees with me but his siblings are pissed that we kicked their parents out because now one of them has to take them in. So am I the rear end in a top hat?

Randy Travesty
Oct 27, 2014

PHANTOM QUEEN


LadyPictureShow posted:

My stalker dad (47m) is seeing my sister-in-law (31f) and aiming to be my (27f) brother-in-law

Restraining orders are a great idea here.

Hughlander posted:

AITA for kicking my in laws out??


Same as above. Don't loving let that poo poo happen ever.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Hughlander posted:

I vaguely remember it but couldn't find it when i went looking. I did find this one though...
AITA for kicking my in laws out??


I've heard a lot of bad cover stories for "We looked through your stuff cause we thought you had drugs we could use" and this definitely up there.

Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat

Hughlander posted:

I vaguely remember it but couldn't find it when i went looking. I did find this one though...
AITA for kicking my in laws out??

quote:

Update: they said they “don’t have any money” so we went forward with forwarding the video to family members and we also went to the police. We are waiting for a court date and the officers suggested a restraining order so we do have one in place. We absolutely no contact. Anything they have to say to us has to go through either his family or through the police.

lol get hosed

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!


AITA for not promising to change some of my perfectly harmless behaviors just because my mother-in-law is staying with us?

quote:

For some background, my husband (36M) and I (27F) have been married for a little over a year, and we recently bought a nice house. It has a pool and a hottub and one of the things I've enjoyed is unwinding after a long day. My work has been really busy and stressful (working at a startup).

My family has always been very comfortable with nudity, so I find it really irritating and completely unnecessary to be told to restrict some perfectly harmless things. Such as swimming / hot-tubbing nude, topless sunbathing, having to wear a bra whenever guests are over.

Now, my husband's old mom who is from a different world (a southern lady who is super prudish and very passive aggressive) is staying with us for a month. My husband wants me to stop sunbathing / swimming / hot-tubbing topless and "dressing up a little more" when having breakfast and dinner.

I flat out refused. I told her she's a guest in our house and I won't be rude or inappropriate, but I am not going to change things, especially when its going to cut off a crucial way in which I relax and unwind. I genuinely think my mental health and work will suffer if this avenue is cut off (I spent 10-15 min swimming and another 10-15 min relaxing in the tub EVERY DAY without fail).

AITA here? I am willing to be accommodating with my cooking (she hates vegetarian food, so I'm going to be cooking more meat) among other things, including moving my office setup to a different room to get her a downstairs bedroom (stairs are tough). These make sense, the prudishness, no!

PokeJoe
Aug 24, 2004

hail cgatan


the breasted woman just won't stop

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

Mx. posted:

AITA for not promising to change some of my perfectly harmless behaviors just because my mother-in-law is staying with us?

Is any of those things something you can't do at all to relax with a top on??

Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat

quote:

NTA it's your home. What does your husband mean by "dressing up" for breakfast and dinner?

Edit: I get the feeling most of the people voting Y T A assume she's going to be naked 24/7

quote:

I'm a very hot person and my husband likes to turn up the heat, so I'm pretty loosely dressed most times. A shirt and panties are all I wear since it's already summer here in California

"dressing up" for meals is putting on more than a shirt and panties. wonder what she wears to restaurants

Rescue Toaster
Mar 13, 2003
I mean, tell the husband you're going to absolutely blast the AC as long as mom's there so you're comfortable, and he can suck it up until she's gone?

AreWeDrunkYet
Jul 8, 2006

Hughlander posted:

AITA for kicking my in laws out??

r/relationships: siblings are pissed that we kicked their parents out because now one of them has to take them in

Is that too long?

Blastedhellscape
Jan 1, 2008

Captain Hygiene posted:

AITA for telling my MIL about my "Energy Diet" and saying it's the reason why I don't come to her weekly family dinners anymore?

lovely spineless husband is hopefully also about to learn a harsh truth about the Energy Diet

I'm all for a nice dinner party and get along with most of my family but just having a get-together once a week seems like it would get exhausting.

Also, in my family my mom and my sister-in-law have clashing personalities and hate each other, so the once-a-month family dinners are a little awkward and uncomfortable. If my sister-in-law decided she just didn't want to attend and stayed away from us we'd probably all be a lot happier, herself included, and have a lot less drama and tension when my parents visited with my brother and his kids. I can't fathom these families where everyone seems to be working hard to force people who obviously don't get along to socialize, instead of just being like: "Yeah, my wife decided to go have a vacation with her friends/hobbies while I have dinner with my parents and siblings this one night."

Olive Branch
May 26, 2010

There is no wealth like knowledge, no poverty like ignorance.

Evil Willow posted:

Olive Branchson.
Quoting this from yesterday to say I approve of Lawn Order.

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Foo Diddley posted:

"dressing up" for meals is putting on more than a shirt and panties. wonder what she wears to restaurants

I wonder what she wore to her siblings’ weddings…

Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat

therobit posted:

I wonder what she wore to her siblings’ weddings…

all these ppl need to have a fancy dress party just so someone can post pics

really curious to know what they think "black tie" means

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

Foo Diddley posted:

all these ppl need to have a fancy dress party just so someone can post pics

really curious to know what they think "black tie" means

Black tie. Nothing else.

trickybiscuits
Jan 13, 2008

yospos

Brawnfire posted:

I put salt and pepper in at like every stage, it's practically a tic. Prep ingredients! Salt and pepper. Cook meat! Salt and pepper. Make pan sauce! Salt and pepper. Cook veggies! Salt and pepper. Make grains. Salt and pepper. Serve, with salt and pepper to taste.

Ths sounds like a terrible birthday cake.

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...
AITA - For not letting my son listen to audio books after lights out?

quote:

My wife and I have an agreement, she gets the kids up in the morning, I put them to bed in the evening, it works well for both of us, I'm useless for a good hour after I wake up, she wants to relax in the evening. That means it's always been on me to establish a good night time routine and to promote healthy sleep patterns, something I take quite seriously. The result is that both are children go to bed easily and sleep well through the night, however.....

My son is about to turn 6 and is starting to get a little rebellious, bed time is now something to resist and to delay, I'm strict so he knows he can't get away with it with me, he gets one or two stories and then the lights go out, my wife on the other hand is a bit of a soft touch. My son has started asking for Mummy to come up and check on him after lights out, he'll then use this as an opportunity to play. Because she can't say no to him she'll settle him by putting on an audio story that he can listen to whilst he falls asleep. It's now at the point that he expects this to happen every night, I want to nip this in the bud.

I want to go back to the routine of light's out being time to go sleep, to that end I don't want my wife going up to see him after this time. My wife, who always used to listen to stories as she was falling asleep when she was a little girl, doesn't see the harm in putting on stories for him. If he asks him to she'll do it. This led to an argument, I think she is disrupting bed time, she thinks I'm being stubborn and banning something totally reasonable.

Am I the arsehole for not letting my son listen to audio books after lights out?

Edit - I'm not responding to posts because I've received a short ban for breaking rule 3. I thank those that have listened to me and offered constructive criticism, you have helped shape my view on this issue and how I should continue.

For those who have decided I'm not the arsehole I thank you for your sympathy. For those who think I am I thank you for your candour. For those who call me a bad parent I forgive you, you're only reacting to the words I wrote.

Take care all.

For those wondering, rule 3 is not accepting the judgement.

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time
AITA for bringing up my son's ex While his new fiancé was over for Dinner?

quote:

I (42F) have a son (M24). I had my son, "Dean '' at 18 and am very attached to him because my parents kicked me out and my ex walked out, so I raised him all by myself. About 1 year ago Dean met a girl, "Hannah" while at a bar. She seemed nice when I met her, but Dean had just broken up with another girl, "Emma'' 3 weeks prior.

Emma and Dean had been dating since they were Seniors in high school and I was so excited when Dean proposed about 4 weeks prior to meeting Hannah. The problem arose when Emma found out she was unable to have kids. Dean has always told me how much he wanted to have kids. He always wanted to be there for them, because he didn't get to have a father. Once Dean found out about Emma not being able to have kids, he broke up with her. I was so upset because I didn't understand why he couldn't just adopt or hire a surrogate to have kids instead.

Fast Forward to 3 weeks later and he meets Hannah at a bar. Like I said, she seemed nice, but I was still upset about him breaking it off with Emma.

Last week he proposed to Hannah and she said yes. I was happy for him.

The problem here is when we were talking at the dinner table and the topic of children came up (not by me). I asked Hannah about how many children she wanted and she told me that she hated kids and never wanted them. I looked at Dean thinking this may shock him, but he didn't look shocked at all.

Here is where I may be the AH:

I asked my son, in front of Hannah, why he proposed to a girl that does not want kids, but broke up an engagement with a girl that he dated for 6 years because she was incapable of having kids. Dean's eyes got wide and he started turning red with embarrassment. Hannah was shocked and said something along the lines of, "Since when were you engaged?"

That's when I remembered that Dean told me to never bring up his engagement with Emma b/c he was scared of how Hannah would react.

Hannah left the table. I asked him the question again, and he said that he was going to change Hannah's mind. I told him that Hannah was older than him and had had so much more time to think about the topic, and she was most likely dead set on the idea of not wanting kids and hating them. I really wished I had just kept my mouth shut. Dean then stormed off after Hannah.

So, AITA?

Mr. Lobe
Feb 23, 2007

... Dry bones...


Man, what a lovely little bastard she ended up raising.

DeadMansSuspenders
Jan 10, 2012

I wanna be your left hand man

Yeah, previous engagements are a bit of a required disclosure when you plan on marrying someone.

AceClown
Sep 11, 2005

therobit posted:

I asked him the question again, and he said that he was going to change Hannah's mind.

oh gently caress right off with this you little poo poo

SirSamVimes
Jul 21, 2008

~* Challenge *~


AceClown posted:

oh gently caress right off with this you little poo poo

Translation: he was going to sabotage her birth control.

Good on the mum for saving her.

DeadMansSuspenders
Jan 10, 2012

I wanna be your left hand man

My (24f) younger sister (16f) thinks she's parentified. She isn't. Offer to help was met with yelling.

quote:

I am the oldest of dad's 7 kids. He had me and my brother (20m) and sisters (19f & 22f) with my mother. Then he left mum, married stepmum, and had 3 more kids: 16f, 11m, and 8f, my half siblings. Currently all of dad's children, except me and 20m, live with him.

I'll refer to 16f as "Addy". Addy is in secondary school, doing her GCSEs this year. She feels she is being parentified. Her reasoning is:
  • Addy has to walk to and from school with 11m (they're in the same school, 10 mins from home)
  • She has recently begun eating different food to everyone else, so dad has told Addy she needs to cook for herself, though Addy is welcome to eat their food and they buy her products
  • She has chores such as taking out the bins and doing laundry one day a week (stepmum, dad, and my full siblings do it the rest of the time) (Addy earns an allowance from this)
  • Addy is asked to babysit whenever dad and stepmum need a babysitter. The offer is extended to Addy as well as 19f and 22f, and they are paid for this.
  • 11m and 8f don't have as many chores as she does
I'm usually Addy's go-to person if she needs help or advice. However, when Addy complained that she was being parentified due to the above reasons, none of the above struck me as parentification. I tried to be sympathetic and listen, but I really think she's overhyping this. I have checked with 19f and 22f, and they confirmed that the above is accurate and she is not being parentified.

Regardless, I said that if she ever needs a break, she can come stay with me (20 mins away). She asked if she could come to live with me until end of the school year. I said if she thought it would help with her GCSEs and dad okays it, then sure, adding that my daughter (age 7) would love to have her aunt Addy around. Addy then asked if she'd have to babysit. I said no, but if I need a sitter I might ask her and pay her, just like at home. I also said she would have to cook her own meals as I won't have time to make 2 separate dinners, though I will buy her food, and I'm not about to start doing her laundry or cleaning her room like stepmum does, though she won't have to pay rent or anything like that.

Addy then yelled at me that she needs a break from all that, she doesn't want to continue the parentification at my place, and I blurted that she was not being parentified. She said I was invalidating her feelings, and is now not taking my calls. She is, however, reading my messages.

What can I say to communicate that her feelings are valid, and I didn't mean to upset her, but she is not being parentified?

​TL;DR: 16 year old (half) sister feels her chores are on par with parentification and asked me for help. I said she could stay with me, but she still had to do chores. She said I was continuing the parentification and I said she wasn't being parentified, and now she's ignoring my calls. What should I say to her?

DeadMansSuspenders
Jan 10, 2012

I wanna be your left hand man

My [38M] wife [34F] won't let me go bowling with my kids.

quote:

My wife [34F] and I [38M] have three little kids (5, 8, 9). Unfortunately, we have had serious marital problems for the past 18 months but are both still here and working on things (although have talked about divorce and what separating would look like). We have gone to marriage counselors on and off for about 2 years and have been going to individual counselors consistently for more one year.

We have had a number of problems that have hurt our relationship over the years and through talking and counseling I think we have at least a better understanding of them and how to fix things. Some are getting a little better, and some are not but at least we understand our differences – at least I think so.

One issue in particular which is not getting better and is a major issue for me is her prioritizing her Mom (my MIL) ahead of me and arguably our kids sometimes. My wife had a fairly traumatic childhood and I think it is now extremely codependent/enmeshed/parentified/something with her Mom. She refuses to admit any of this and thinks he childhood was ok and think her relationship with her Mom is just close and not unhealthy.

Examples of this in the past:
  • I told MIL to stop speaking trash about other family members when she was alone with our kids (this was reported to me by my daughter). She basically told me go away, she is a good grandma, she knows how to raise kids, etc. (I’m like FU they are MY KIDS. Wife stays basically silent through this.)
  • MIL speaks poorly about ALL of her other kids’ spouses.
  • My wife has way overly shared about our marital problems with her Mom and my wife recognizes this and has tempered it a little (but not fully), but I think MIL will forever think I’m a horrible person (I’m not and I’m actually a really good Dad).
  • Does not defend me when her Mom talks poorly about me for no reason.
  • Is rude to me in our home and can’t even look me in the eye.
  • MIL calls me names (e.g. rear end in a top hat). She has never apologized for any of this.
  • MIL speaks poorly about my siblings (kids uncles).
  • My wife tells me to “mind my own business” when I’m asking what she is talking to her Mom about.
  • My wife changed her phone passcode to keep “secret” txt threads with her Mom away from me where they were talking poorly about me and my parenting/etc.
I feel like she has more loyalty to her Mom than to me.

So the issue today, and what I’m looking for feedback on: I have no relationship with MIL. She refuses to talk to me or be in the same place as me, despite me trying to reach out several times (6!) with an olive branch to put the past behind us and lets all be friends (for our kids/grandkids sake). MIL refuses.

One marriage counselor suggested: “Fine, that is MIL’s choice, cut her out entirely until she can behave like an adult and be a good example for the kids.” I agree 100%. My wife can’t do it. In her core she can’t “cut out” her Mom, even though I honestly think the “no contact” would last about 2 weeks until MIL caved and wanted to see her grandkids again. My wife is so loyal to her Mom it is more like she is the parent and cannot “abandon” her under any circumstances.

So… as a lovely compromise, even though I don’t think it is nearly sufficient, I agreed to start to “limit” grandma to once per week to see the kids. Rather than 3-5 days per week of this toxicity. I really don’t like my kids being around someone that (a) hates me, (b) can’t talk to me or look at me, (c) doesn’t respect my very reasonable requests as a parent, and (d) can’t be with me and my kids at the same time (I’m not allowed with my kids during “Grandma time”). My kids know that Grandma doesn’t like me – and that is really lovely. I don’t want them to have to choose between Grandma or Dad

So we have this lovely “once per week compromise” in place and the kids see Grandma at her house on Saturday for several hours. But now my wife wants to take them bowling with Grandma today – 5 days later. Not a week. My wife has backpedaled on agreements like many this in the past.

So… I said fine and I’ll come too! (I can actually take the afternoon off of work.) My wife does not want that because Grandma does not want that and for whatever reason, she can not go bowling with my family and I- I can’t be there. So my wife doesn’t want me to go. She won’t tell me what bowling alley they are meeting at.

Holy poo poo reddit?!?! This totally infuriates me, and my wife is an otherwise smart person, but this sad, ridiculous loyalty to her Mom is driving me crazy. Or am I overreacting and I should just let them go bowling? My kids have totally picked up on the fact that Daddy can’t do certain things or go certain places because Grandma is there and that is a big pile of poo IMO. Any thoughts?

Tl;dr: I can’t go bowling with my wife and kids because MIL will be there and she doesn’t want me there.

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

ah, grim scenarios

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!


*checks kids ages* sorry he's let this go on for how long

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Serephina
Nov 8, 2005

恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー
Quick 'n Easy:

My (33M) ex (34F) confided she wanted her only child to be mine. What do I do with this info?

A: Run

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