LATE BREAKING NEWS: Psycho in Colorado demolishes town with bulldozer

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > LATE BREAKING NEWS: Psycho in Colorado demolishes town with bulldozer

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

Why haven't they brought in a sniper yet?

# ¿ Jun 4, 2004 23:32

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 04:20

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

He should have found a few accomplices first.

You know, where he could make pitstops to get re-fueled and poo poo.

# ¿ Jun 4, 2004 23:53

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

Pyros came out of the closet to say:
Seems like he did quite a bit of work. I hope he doesn't get bored before his fuel runs out.

This story should be an inspiration for future psychotic terrorists: get your poo poo straight, plan it out ahead, cover all grounds, and have a back-up plan. If you want to make CNN you can't be a loving amatuer about it.

# ¿ Jun 4, 2004 23:55

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

slayer548 came out of the closet to say:
WTF? A couple of loser kids in Colorado shoot a few people at school and get weeks of media coverage, and this guy just gets a blurb on CNN? Come on, at least interrupt "my regularly scheduled programming"...

If they give him big-time coverage it might start a trend, kind of like school-shootings did. Killdozers will be popping up all over America.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 00:01

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

Intel&Sebastian came out of the closet to say:
Killdozers don't kill people, people kill people.

Unless it's some kind of hyper-intelligent killdozer.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for the killdozer trend.

It'll be kind of like watching battle-bots, only a lot better.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 00:04

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

The more this story develops the more it sounds like a plot to a made-for-TNT movie.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 00:09

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

ilovemonkeys came out of the closet to say:
Apparently many sources were quoted as saying he was armed and firing at authorities. Although the claims were never substantiated, it was enough to warrant the pigs to protect themselves.

drat those "pigs," trying to protect themselves and all.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 01:25

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

JohnnyCanuck came out of the closet to say:
What the hell, I think I'll try to profit off him anyway.

The best way to profit off killdozer man is to build more killdozers and auction them off to international terrorists.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 01:29

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

Doccers came out of the closet to say:
Channel 4 just showed video, they tried twice to "blow up" the bulldozer (?) but weren't able to penetrate the armor.

So the guy's still in the bulldozer?

What the hell are they using explosives for, they're going to kill him.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 05:13

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

Tokaii came out of the closet to say:
People who seriously support this guy would be singing a much different tune if it was their house our business knocked down. As to the 'crooked' city management there isn't a city in the country that doesn't have someone hating them like this. Somehow I don't think an armored bulldozer is the ideal response.

I think it's better that he takes out his frustration by knocking down a few buildings rather than taking it out via a shooting spree.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 05:39

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

Tokaii came out of the closet to say:
Do you think he checked those houses to make sure nobody was asleep in them?

He didn't destroy any houses.

edit: Beaten. :)

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 05:42

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

Tokaii came out of the closet to say:
The CNN story said he knocked down houses of the city council members.

Can you link the story, please? I'm not doubting you, I'd just like to read it.

From what I've read he just targeted the courthouse and specific businesses.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 05:44

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

Tokaii came out of the closet to say:
But I am surprised that in a place like SA one differing opinion in 22+ pages of a thread would be greeted with such animosity.

I'm sure the reason they responded with animosity didn't have anything to do with the fact that you basically called them third graders.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 05:52

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

So what time is it in Colorado? I'm sure he'll be stuck in there overnight.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 06:25

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 04:20

vanbags: Dec 6, 2003; An ape.

quote:

Velsk came out of the closet to say:
I wonder if all the armor on the killdozer has cut off the air circulation inside?

The video said he had ventilation.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2004 06:43

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > LATE BREAKING NEWS: Psycho in Colorado demolishes town with bulldozer