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DropShadow
Apr 15, 2003

Leninboarrir posted:

http://cnj.craigslist.org/car/550405854.html

no no no =(

At first I thought the pictures were just showing a pile of parts.

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Medicinal Penguin
May 19, 2006

Leninboarrir posted:

http://cnj.craigslist.org/car/550405854.html

no no no =(

It's like a transformer that only goes halfway to kickass robot, then gets stuck.

Simkin
May 18, 2007

"He says he's going to be number one!"
http://victoria.craigslist.ca/car/549017140.html

Honda CRX.
Retarded mileage: Check
Modzz: Check
Rust/Driven in snow: check

Honestly, I wish this guy were an anomaly in my area, but used car prices around here are absolutely loving retarded. I mean, someone's selling a 91 Camry for loving 5 grand. I don't care how nice it is, unless it's sporting a 1UZ or something under the hood, there's no way it justifies that. And a 1990 Civic with nearly half a loving million kilometers on the clock for 1500$. :psyduck:

nerdrum
Aug 17, 2007

where am I

Simkin posted:

http://victoria.craigslist.ca/car/549017140.html

Honda CRX.
Retarded mileage: Check
Modzz: Check
Rust/Driven in snow: check

Honestly, I wish this guy were an anomaly in my area, but used car prices around here are absolutely loving retarded. I mean, someone's selling a 91 Camry for loving 5 grand. I don't care how nice it is, unless it's sporting a 1UZ or something under the hood, there's no way it justifies that. And a 1990 Civic with nearly half a loving million kilometers on the clock for 1500$. :psyduck:

hahaha check out that camber in the back.

Simkin
May 18, 2007

"He says he's going to be number one!"
Yessirreeee, positive camber has done wonders for my autocross time. As has this Toyota steering wheel. Wait, make that steering wheel without a boss, that I will likely impale my face upon. :downsgun:

Simkin fucked around with this message at 11:44 on Jan 25, 2008

AF
Oct 8, 2007
hi
Was he driving with his highbeams on in the second video? :downs:

edit: yeah, it's a stock Honda CRX wheel. At first I thought it was dumb that he removed that piece because there would be an airbag there, but then I remembered that Hondas of that vintage didn't have airbags. Nevertheless, still dumb. I don't know why that middle piece would go missing - it looks terrible without it, and yes, would be quite nasty to impale your face on.

haha, yeah, that first picture is a completely different car. Some kind of Toyota SUV or truck, since it's got the transfer case shift knob down there.

AF fucked around with this message at 12:36 on Jan 25, 2008

Simkin
May 18, 2007

"He says he's going to be number one!"
I guess you're right. Which would mean that either a) it's a different car in the first pic, or b)he swapped a functional frankenstein setup for a non-functional setup.



Either way, the car sounds like a truck when he starts it up, as well as having the telltale knock of a CV going. Yes, it does look like he's driving around w/high beams on. Considering the vehicle, I don't see that as being terribly shocking. I'm surprised he doesn't try to drive it facing backwards in the seat or something.

Damnit, does anyone have a copy of that MSpaint from a couple of months back when someone was being a retard about making the rear seats in their Eclips rear facing? I think it may have been by sigtrap, but I could have been wrong, and it definitely involved a Tetris style rearrangement of seats to accomodate people. I though I had it saved somewhere to illustrate approximately how this guy probably imagined his car functioning.

/offtopic

MrKatharsis
Nov 29, 2003

feel the bern
It's not really 'Craigslist Gold', but an '89 Camry with a V6 and a manual transmission is a rare beast, indeed. I was REALLY REALLY tempted to buy it, but I already have two vehicles.

http://gainesville.craigslist.org/car/543777486.html

Global688
Dec 28, 2006

Simkin posted:

http://victoria.craigslist.ca/car/549017140.html

Honda CRX.
Retarded mileage: Check
Modzz: Check
Rust/Driven in snow: check

Hrm its kinda early bu he says he has a b16a vtec dohc motor in there. Looks to me like a b18c1 ls non vtec dohc motor which are worth squat this day and age. Yeah definitly not worth 1500$.

Hypnolobster
Apr 12, 2007

What this sausage party needs is a big dollop of ketchup! Too bad I didn't make any. :(

Leninboarrir posted:

http://cnj.craigslist.org/car/550405854.html

no no no =(
Why would someone who has spend that much time (despite the fact that such time would be horribly misplaced in such an endeavor) have lovely pictures like that?
Silly photoshoppers. Photoshop your scam trucks in HIGHER RES




Also, emailed him for lols

Luxmore
Jun 5, 2001

Simkin posted:

Honestly, I wish this guy were an anomaly in my area, but used car prices around here are absolutely loving retarded. I mean, someone's selling a 91 Camry for loving 5 grand. I don't care how nice it is, unless it's sporting a 1UZ or something under the hood, there's no way it justifies that. And a 1990 Civic with nearly half a loving million kilometers on the clock for 1500$. :psyduck:
You know we pay a premium for used cars here because anything born and raised in Victoria has probably seen snow twice in its life, and has a 50% chance of having been driven by an 90 year old woman from Oak Bay who never went faster than 20kph.

This does not really apply when trying to sell a rusted-out shitheap from Port Alberni though.

Dr Rocksalt
Oct 21, 2004
9k for a Fiero with a Diablo kit and a dozen cans of worms? Sign me up!

http://denver.craigslist.org/car/536170614.html

Nitrox
Jul 5, 2002

Slur, your fighting style is extremely problematic!

kimbo305 posted:

Could this be actual gold?
http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/car/550364445.html

Person handy with a wrench could turn a profit or get a deal, assuming the damage is as limited as claimed.
That price is about right considering age and mileage, minus a few hundred for a clutch job.

Now the fact that it was used to haul wet dogs around is another matter.

Zool
Mar 21, 2005

The motard rap
for all my riders
at the track
Dirt hardpacked
corner workers better
step back
http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/car/550809616.html

Jared posted:

1975 Porsche 911 Turbo
Reply to: see below
Date: 2008-01-24, 9:21PM PST


one of the fastes 911 turbos around 670HP at the wheels.
low miles.
RED.
good tires.
very nice car crazy fast, faster than the ford GT, the Ford GT is for sale also.
always in a garage.
I can e-mail you pics.

Jared
208-301-0683

Jared posted:

the Ford GT is for sale also.

The Ford GT doesn't even get it's own ad.

RED.

Flying Emu
Jan 20, 2006
*turns to face sunset, long, greasy hair flows softly in the wind*
http://sandiego.craigslist.org/nsd/mcy/550751028.html

CL posted:

Listed is a mint condition 2006 Honda CBR 600rr. 9k on the odometer, and I am selling at $7,500 OBO. Bike has many extras including: Yoshimura exhaust system, after market power chip, custom blue on black paint job, shaved carbon fiber turn signals, smoked windscreen, and mullet eliminator. The price also includes a brand new KBC helmet. This bike has intense torque and is very light, which makes it perfect for beginners, stunt riders, and cruisers. I only put 500 miles on the bike and I unfortunately have to sell it to afford my rent. E-mail, or call Don any time at 760-504-4641 or 858-748-3775 to come take it for a spin and you'll fall in love just like I did.
I can't wait for a beginner to buy this so I can buy the parts off it 2 weeks later.

Simkin
May 18, 2007

"He says he's going to be number one!"

Luxmore posted:

probably seen snow twice in its life, and has a 50% chance of having been driven by an 90 year old woman from Oak Bay who never went faster than 20kph.

I wish that wasn't so true. :sigh:

The other 50%, of course, are owned by tweakers from Langford, with 18 dogs, 12 kids, and no knowledge of basic car maintenance.

VideoTapir
Oct 18, 2005

He'll tire eventually.
http://portland.craigslist.org/wsc/car/551959942.html

quote:

dosnt run atm just needs a fuel pump motor runs great other than that.

So it doesn't run, but it runs great! I THINK I get what he means, but then that could be the idea. (And how would he know what other problems there are or are not if it isn't running because of the fuel pump?)

honkykong
Sep 20, 2005


http://cleveland.craigslist.org/car/552149700.html

I think I got a headache from trying to decipher this, and I still don't understand most of it.

kimbo305
Jun 9, 2007

actually, yeah, I am a little mad

VideoTapir posted:

http://portland.craigslist.org/wsc/car/551959942.html


So it doesn't run, but it runs great! I THINK I get what he means, but then that could be the idea. (And how would he know what other problems there are or are not if it isn't running because of the fuel pump?)

Maybe a jealous gf cleanly ripped out just the fuel pump, but it was running great up to that point?

meatpimp
May 15, 2004

Psst -- Wanna buy

:) EVERYWHERE :)
some high-quality thread's DESTROYED!

:kheldragar:

honkykong posted:

http://cleveland.craigslist.org/car/552149700.html

I think I got a headache from trying to decipher this, and I still don't understand most of it.

quote:

the only problem with this car it start right up with no problem, but the only problem is i believe my crankshaft went out it drive in low gear but move in drive with and whine to it when you put into gear once fix it will be and great running car all over again new radiator and tuneup done on it.

WHAT is not clear about that?

MrKatharsis
Nov 29, 2003

feel the bern

honkykong posted:

http://cleveland.craigslist.org/car/552149700.html

I think I got a headache from trying to decipher this, and I still don't understand most of it.

PLEASE READ CAREFULLY

Simkin
May 18, 2007

"He says he's going to be number one!"
http://vancouver.craigslist.ca/mcy/550203639.html
NEVER DRIVEN. Seriously guys, they hand carried it off the assembly line, so not a single bearing has moved from original factory specs.

Those 2000km that are on the odo are like the immaculate conception of the automotive world.

BabyJesus
Nov 13, 2002

Global688 posted:

Hrm its kinda early bu he says he has a b16a vtec dohc motor in there. Looks to me like a b18c1 ls non vtec dohc motor which are worth squat this day and age. Yeah definitly not worth 1500$.

B16A1's are ~140hp DOHC VTEC. They sell for $1500 or so used, assuming it is a JDM imported engine. Not with 180k on the engine though. :v:

MrKatharsis
Nov 29, 2003

feel the bern
http://gainesville.craigslist.org/car/555018817.html

1996 - Ford Ranger
$29,500 See photos, If you look at it and want a pickup, you will buy it.

VideoTapir
Oct 18, 2005

He'll tire eventually.

MrKatharsis posted:

http://gainesville.craigslist.org/car/555018817.html

1996 - Ford Ranger
$29,500 See photos, If you look at it and want a pickup, you will buy it.

Wife probably told him to sell the truck.

"SEE, NO ONE'S BUYING!" (secretly happy he can keep the truck)

kimbo305
Jun 9, 2007

actually, yeah, I am a little mad
http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/car/548487520.html

So....jail's involved in this one, huh?

Panty Saluter
Jan 17, 2004

Making learning fun!

kimbo305 posted:

http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/car/548487520.html

So....jail's involved in this one, huh?

craigslist tard posted:

bumber

OK - I realize that when you consider all of the misspellings and grammatical errors it's silly to harp on just one. Something about this really bugs me - the p and b sounds are pretty distinct. I've never heard ANYONE pronounce the word "bumber". I can only assume the people who make this mistake have serious hearing loss.





and also their mothers drank a fifth of bacardi 151 daily during their pregnancy

streetlamp
May 7, 2007

Danny likes his party hat
He does not like his banana hat

deviant. posted:

OK - I realize that when you consider all of the misspellings and grammatical errors it's silly to harp on just one. Something about this really bugs me - the p and b sounds are pretty distinct. I've never heard ANYONE pronounce the word "bumber". I can only assume the people who make this mistake have serious hearing loss.





and also their mothers drank a fifth of bacardi 151 daily during their pregnancy

My favorite part is
"if i do i will give it and sell it to you for 200 cuzz the title is a big deal"

Its such a weird dialect, is that how he is sounding out and spelling these words?

kimbo305
Jun 9, 2007

actually, yeah, I am a little mad

deviant. posted:

OK - I realize that when you consider all of the misspellings and grammatical errors it's silly to harp on just one. Something about this really bugs me - the p and b sounds are pretty distinct. I've never heard ANYONE pronounce the word "bumber". I can only assume the people who make this mistake have serious hearing loss.


A lot of Asian fobs have trouble with it, actually.
It's a two way street, linguistically. Koreans think of the sound as Gorea, and Gim instead of Kim.

Panty Saluter
Jan 17, 2004

Making learning fun!

kimbo305 posted:

A lot of Asian fobs have trouble with it, actually.
It's a two way street, linguistically. Koreans think of the sound as Gorea, and Gim instead of Kim.

OIC. I can make exceptions for the ESL crowd. The misspelling still bugs me, and if my memory serves I've seen native English speakers do it as well.

streetlamp
May 7, 2007

Danny likes his party hat
He does not like his banana hat
Oh god, cmon people.

http://richmond.craigslist.org/car/539999624.html

Highlights include the car being in "exselent kondeshen"

kimbo305
Jun 9, 2007

actually, yeah, I am a little mad

deviant. posted:

OIC. I can make exceptions for the ESL crowd. The misspelling still bugs me, and if my memory serves I've seen native English speakers do it as well.

The reason I'm guessing he's asian is cuz the city he's refering to, Lowell, is like Southeast Asia Town.

Simkin
May 18, 2007

"He says he's going to be number one!"

streetlamp posted:

Eeeenglish is not this person's first language

:wtc: Honestly, as a linguist, I'm not supposed to take offence at people doing wierd poo poo with languages, as English has been a bastard language for as long as it has been spoken, but... 'kall' 'thenks' and 'exselent kondeshen'

It almost looks like they were using some sort of hosed up speech-to-text program, and had it set to german or something.

Hypnolobster
Apr 12, 2007

What this sausage party needs is a big dollop of ketchup! Too bad I didn't make any. :(

Has anyone ever considered going to meet some of these people to find out what the living gently caress is wrong with them?

How in hell do you have such a low IQ that you cannot spell check? Or perhaps, y'know, spend more than 30 seconds typing out an ad that could potentially get you money if you actually SPELT WURDS? What the gently caress kind of value system is this?

Flying_Dane
Jan 17, 2006

Grymm & Frostbytten
http://richmond.craigslist.org/car/555522619.html

Is he selling 32 of them or wts?... also, burd.

IOwnCalculus
Apr 2, 2003





MrKatharsis posted:

http://gainesville.craigslist.org/car/555018817.html

1996 - Ford Ranger
$29,500 See photos, If you look at it and want a pickup, you will buy it.

Looks like it was a typo, the ad says $2950 now.

Dr Rocksalt
Oct 21, 2004

Flying_Dane posted:

http://richmond.craigslist.org/car/555522619.html

Is he selling 32 of them or wts?... also, burd.

Wow... if you stare past it, it becomes like a magic eye. I guess he's selling only like 16 "burds" but they're all three dimensional. Similary, there is a "Couger" for sale on my CL. I've always wanted to drive a "Coo-jer."

root beer
Nov 13, 2005

kimbo305 posted:

A lot of Asian fobs have trouble with it, actually.
It's a two way street, linguistically. Koreans think of the sound as Gorea, and Gim instead of Kim.

Sure, but does that explain why this deal donk come around every day?

Huggable Bear King
Jan 12, 2006
H.B.K.
http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/nva/car/552196859.html

quote:

1977 Mustang Hatchback with V6 Motor but motor is bad. Will trade for a camper or for guns. if interested in looking at please call me at 304-496-8107. Leave a detailed message.

I don't think it's possible to sound any more redneck.

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Kotaru
Jan 17, 2004

"Serve the Hive.....
Feel the groove.
I control....
the way you move."
I can't make heads or tails of this from the photo, but it's a "1981 cadillac pick-up".

http://easttexas.craigslist.org/car/555664294.html

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