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I'm getting married in June with about 50 guests, and I think, including the engagement ring, it's going to end up costing about $19-$20k: $5300 Engagement ring $1700 Wedding band (groom) $ 900 Wedding band (bride) $1400 Bridal gown/shoes/etc $ 150 Park reservation $ 400 Officiant fee $ 600 Photographer fee $ 400 Invitations $ 150 Chairs/tables/etc rental $ 900 Flowers/decorations/etc $6000 Reception (space/food/booze) $1000 Travel/misc expenses in planning the wedding ------ $18000 So far TBD: Tux Rental, Hotel Reservation, Bride's cosmetics/hair/etc. My parents are paying for the reception, and I'm paying for the rest. I used about $4000 in savings, and have used a line of credit for the remaining $8-$10k which I'll pay off over the next 2-3 years. The rings are expensive, but quite nice. We decided that they're really the one part of our wedding that is going to be with us every day for the rest of our lives, so we definitely didn't want to skimp on that. They're all platinum since my fiancee hates yellow gold, and white gold is kind of cheap and not very durable comparatively. She also hates diamonds, so it's a ~3ct deep blue sapphire that we purchased from an awesome family-run colored gem shop in the LA jewelery district. The ring is also an interesting design wherein the wedding band can be worn separately, or it will fit inside the engagement ring. I don't have the photos on hand right now, but the ring looks basically like this (from the jewler's site):  Except our sapphire is oval-cut and darker. This photo shows a band inside the ring, but the engagement ring can be worn alone and the part around the finger looks like two rails with a space between them. The bands look like this:  Edit: Also, we're delaying our honeymoon for probably about a year so that I can accumulate enough vacation time at my new job to actually be able to take one. So I have no idea what that will cost yet. Smackbilly fucked around with this message at 20:41 on Apr 24, 2008 |
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Apr 24, 2008 20:29
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Smackbilly posted:$5300 Engagement ring Can you tell me more about your reception? What was the per-head breakdown? How long was the event? was it at night, on a saturday, during a peak time? edit: just saw that it was 50 people, sorry.
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May 5, 2008 16:08
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HelpingFriendlyBook posted:Can you tell me more about your reception? What was the per-head breakdown? How long was the event? was it at night, on a saturday, during a peak time? It hasn't happened yet, but the plans are: - 40 to 50 people - Saturday evening - No explicitly specified time span (6pm to whenever/closing time) It's at a nice restaurant in a private room, but it's not a hall with a dance floor and a D.J. or anything. The plus side is that people get high-end restaurant food instead of mediocre catered stuff. The restaurant has group pricing minimums, and $6000 is the price for 50 people (and it decreases proportionally if you have fewer people), so about $120/person, inclusive of plenty of wine. That's actually a bit cheaper than the going rate for that restaurant if you eat there normally.
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May 5, 2008 18:52
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I'm getting married April 14th 09 in Vegas (at the Paris hotel): $500 Plane tickets $2800 Wedding package. This includes: # Guitarist throughout Ceremony # Bride's Bouquet # Matching Groom's Boutonniere # Matching Maid of Honor Bouquet # Matching Best Man's Boutonniere # Wired, French Lace Pew Bows # Unity Candle Service # Professional Digital-Ceremony Photography # Studio Photo Session for the Newlyweds # Wedding Ceremony DVD # Online Webcasting # 24 - 4x6 Photographs # One Hour On-Property Photography Tour for the Bride & Groom (immediately following the ceremony) # 4x6 Photo Album # Wedding Certificate Holder # A Bottle of Champagne # A Pair of Paris Champagne Glasses # Two Night's Stay in a LeMans Petite Suite*** # Rose Petals for Your Suite # Chocolate Covered Strawberries for Two # Champagne Breakfast in Bed Gift Certificate # In-Suite Wine & Cheese Welcome Amenity # Bride's Lace Garter Also, friends and family are permitted to bring their own cameras, the only rule is no flash in the chapel and no tripods. Since I was a photo major, and a bunch of my friends were too, the longer exposures inside will help out, and outside I can have them do pictures for me. $500 Hotel for two extra days $1500 plane/cruise tickets for honeymoon $800 Food for 250 people (cooking free, go mom club! My mom, stepmom, and his mom are staying at my MIL's house for 2 days prior to the reception and they're going to have the ultimate cooking party) $250 Wedding dress. Originally $2200. Badass deal. Music for reception: Free (friends!) Still to add: Reception decor Hall rental (most likely free) Spending money for Vegas/honeymoon Total so far: $6350 (But my Dad is paying for the food)
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May 5, 2008 21:29
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Do the guys need to see the dresses in order to pick their tuxedos? I thought they only needed to know the color of the bridesmaid dresses. My fiance already saw me in my wedding dress (and saved a pic to his phone), and so if he see's the bridesmaid dresses too then there's basically nothing left as a "suprise" (he hates suprises & flipped out about it). I thought all the guys were ever given were the dress colors, but he flipped when I told him that. He says they need to see the dresses so they can match the style...? I thought the only time that really mattered was if it was a theme/era wedding. But it's not. I just figured guys were getting your average everyday wedding tux with color accents that match the dress colors.
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May 6, 2008 04:45
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Is it normal to just invite family and not friends? Looking at my list I've got about 22 people just on my side of the family alone. And is it normal to get your guests to pay for their lodgings? I feel bad but if I have to pay for them to come up here it's gonna leave me broke. And another question: does the actual wedding ceremony include whoever the hell wants to come, and then only your picks come to the reception/dinner afterwards? Because I don't mind if people show up to watch us get married, but I can't feed/supply booze to a poo poo ton of people I see maybe once a year.
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May 7, 2008 21:53
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teamgod posted:Is it normal to just invite family and not friends? Looking at my list I've got about 22 people just on my side of the family alone. And is it normal to get your guests to pay for their lodgings? I feel bad but if I have to pay for them to come up here it's gonna leave me broke. It's definitely normal to only invite family. And I've never been to a wedding where the couple paid for hotel rooms. Usually, the couple just sets aside a block of rooms at a hotel, and it's up to the guests to pay for them. In my experience, if you invite people to a wedding, you are inviting them to the wedding and the reception. Actually, a lot of people skip the wedding and only attend the reception, not the other way around. Sometimes people are just invited to the after-dinner/dancing part of the reception, so you could do that if there are people you want to invite but don't want to pay for their meal.
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May 7, 2008 23:01
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I agree. And I feel your pain. Between 1/3 and 1/2 of my 235 guests were my family. I had a ridiculously expensive wedding, and the only person who's hotel room we paid for was my matron of honor - because she is my sister. Also, family-only weddings are becoming increasingly common due to price limitations. As a low-budget wedding photographer, I worked on at least 3 family-only weddings. And I have had several friends elope just to avoid inviting tons of people. As for ceremony vs reception invites, the best compromise I have seen is inviting everybody to the ceremony, then having cake and cocktails for everybody immediately following, and having the full party for a select few later that night/another day.
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May 7, 2008 23:11
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quepasa18 posted:Sometimes people are just invited to the after-dinner/dancing part of the reception, so you could do that if there are people you want to invite but don't want to pay for their meal. do what now posted:As for ceremony vs reception invites, the best compromise I have seen is inviting everybody to the ceremony, then having cake and cocktails for everybody immediately following, and having the full party for a select few later that night/another day. No, you can't do that! That is horribly rude and shows no class. So you have an A list and a B list of friends? How would people feel knowing they were on the B list?
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May 8, 2008 00:14
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IdeoPhanthus posted:Do the guys need to see the dresses in order to pick their tuxedos? I think it's a little weird that he wants to match the tuxes with the bridesmaid's dresses. As you mentioned, I can see if it is a themed wedding, or maybe if you are going really casual that they may want to pick a casual tux. Tuxes are pretty generic. teamgod posted:Is it normal to just invite family and not friends?
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May 8, 2008 00:19
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Pegacorn posted:No, you can't do that! That is horribly rude and shows no class. So you have an A list and a B list of friends? How would people feel knowing they were on the B list? Although it is pretty common, I did not do that. I had 235 people at my wedding. But my wedding budget was insanely high. And speaking as someone who has been on the B list several times (my friends are broke), I don't think it was too big a deal. I always understood that my friends were in a financial bind. But I can see other people getting upset. As for tuxes, unless you guys are wearing tuxes in a bizarre color (powder blue, etc.), you don't really need to worry about matching - a black or grey tux goes with anything.
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May 8, 2008 01:38
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teamgod posted:Is it normal to just invite family and not friends? Looking at my list I've got about 22 people just on my side of the family alone. And is it normal to get your guests to pay for their lodgings? I feel bad but if I have to pay for them to come up here it's gonna leave me broke. Feeding and entertaining even a couple hundred people doesn't have to be expensive to be fun. A wedding reception is a party, for you, your friends, and your family. You don't have to have the ice sculpture, the brass quintet, the chocolate fountain, and the shrimp cocktail. So get a couple kegs, some picnic tables, your college buddy DJ, and some party subs, and you and yours will have a great time for 15$ a head. Further, party subs are tastier than mid-range "chicken or fish" style catering. Slo-Tek fucked around with this message at 02:16 on May 8, 2008 |
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May 8, 2008 02:10
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Pegacorn posted:No, you can't do that! That is horribly rude and shows no class. So you have an A list and a B list of friends? How would people feel knowing they were on the B list? As someone who offered to be on the B list for a friends wedding, I don't think it's rude at all. People have far too many expectations for other peoples weddings. If my friends don't want to pay 60-150 bucks for a meal for me, Im fine with that. Obviously people that you see on a weekly basis shouldn't be on the "B list", but college friends you talk to online? Who cares. You'd also obviously make a point of not putting people on the B list that you think would get offended. I also told my friend he could send me (and the rest of our close friends) an e-vite invitation instead of a real invitation, to save money. And I know for a fact I'm ont the A list, as my boyfriend is a groomsmen.
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May 9, 2008 19:26
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Farewell Horizon posted:As someone who offered to be on the B list for a friends wedding, I don't think it's rude at all. People have far too many expectations for other peoples weddings. If my friends don't want to pay 60-150 bucks for a meal for me, Im fine with that. Obviously people that you see on a weekly basis shouldn't be on the "B list", but college friends you talk to online? Who cares. You'd also obviously make a point of not putting people on the B list that you think would get offended. It is completely rude and poor etiquette. The "B-list" is also known as "The gift grab", people invited only to receive presents from. If you can't afford to have a big expensive party for everyone and you want everyone to come share your day, you should just have a more modest party that everyone can attend. What's wrong with that? It doesn't have anything to do with anyone's expectations of other people's weddings, it has to do with the way you ought to treat people, even on your wedding day.
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May 9, 2008 19:49
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Pegacorn posted:It is completely rude and poor etiquette. The "B-list" is also known as "The gift grab", people invited only to receive presents from. If you can't afford to have a big expensive party for everyone and you want everyone to come share your day, you should just have a more modest party that everyone can attend. What's wrong with that? I have to be honest - according to my wedding planner, who is a recognized expert in the field and a consultant for a major wedding website, the A list/B list thing is still very common. She asked us if we wanted to do that, as many of her clients do, but we declined.
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May 9, 2008 19:53
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Pegacorn posted:No, you can't do that! That is horribly rude and shows no class. So you have an A list and a B list of friends? How would people feel knowing they were on the B list? I've been on a B list before, it it didn't bother me in the slightest. I recognize that people need to draw lines somewhere when putting together their guest list, and I understand if I fall below that line until they get an idea of how many people are coming. I can see how some would be offended though. I'm getting married next month, and we are inviting about 400 people, so there is no A and B list in our case. We didn't want to have to make that determination.
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May 9, 2008 20:18
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I never in my life heard of an A/B list. I would be really, really offended just because its like "You can come, if so-and-so doesn't". I'd rather just not be invited at all. Everyone I know would be totally horrified if we did that. I come from small-townland though so, its to be expected. We don't expect everyone to fly to Vegas, but we're inviting everyone. Our reception is already driving me bonkers though. Where the hell do I put 300 people and what the hell do I feed them? So far the plan is to do a very low-key BBQ style dinner with some music and lots of beer.
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May 9, 2008 20:27
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Pegacorn posted:It is completely rude and poor etiquette. The "B-list" is also known as "The gift grab", people invited only to receive presents from. If you can't afford to have a big expensive party for everyone and you want everyone to come share your day, you should just have a more modest party that everyone can attend. What's wrong with that? Who said anything about the b list bringing gifts? I guess maybe it depends on the kind of person you are, but people can usually see through the "we only want gifts!" facade. My friends don't have a registry, and haven't put "presentation preferred" on their invitations. No gifts are expected. I'm looking at it as less like "you are my inferior friends, so you only deserve cake and cocktails" and more like "You are my friends and I'd like you to witness my marriage, unfortunately, I can't provide everyone with dinner, so we're having cake and cocktails after the ceremony so that you know I appreciate your presence and friendship". If you don't want to go and are offended by not being PRIME FRIEND NUMERO UNO, then maybe you have other issues. And ElanoreMcMantis, I was under the impression it wasn't "you can only come if so and so doesn't", but rather a direct invitation for cake and cocktails, with no dinner on the horizon.
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May 9, 2008 20:35
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I don't have an A/B list because I've invited everyone who I would want there. The concept is pretty popular; my planner book even has a section for B list people. I can see it being useful if your wedding/reception location can only hold X amount of people and you have X+50 on your invite list. It's not necessarily about being greedy or having a wedding within your means, it's just a logics problem.
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May 9, 2008 20:43
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Farewell Horizon posted:And ElanoreMcMantis, I was under the impression it wasn't "you can only come if so and so doesn't", but rather a direct invitation for cake and cocktails, with no dinner on the horizon. Oh I see! No, that wouldn't bother me at all then. Gravitee, may I ask what type/where you got your planner book?
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May 9, 2008 20:52
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ElanoreMcMantis posted:I never in my life heard of an A/B list. I would be really, really offended just because its like "You can come, if so-and-so doesn't". I'd rather just not be invited at all. In my experience, generally speaking, if you have enough alcohol, everybody will be happy.
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May 9, 2008 20:52
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do what now posted:In my experience, generally speaking, if you have enough alcohol, everybody will be happy. Lets not forget the cake. I love cake (I get to cake test tonight with my friend and his fiancee!) Speaking of cake, wtf is with fruit cake at weddings? I know its an English thing, but does anyone actually eat fruitcake anymore? It's gross.
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May 9, 2008 20:57
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Thanks guys; another question though: Does this sound like a decent idea? We have the actual wedding at a cheap hall, then head out to some lodge outside of town for a big 'ol barbeque. Basically everyone who's invited to the wedding comes to the dinner, and it'll be an outside thing at a lake or something. Steaks, chicken, burgers, corn, salads, etc for supper, and then some non-fancy cake/ice cream for dessert. Does it sound trashy or completely acceptable? All the weddings I've been to has been in a hall and either A. catered to kingdom come, or B. fed by family members bringing in their own food. I figure if we go the BBQ way, we save tons of money buying the food ourselves, enjoy cooking it with family members, and you don't have to dress formal either. Plus it's outside so nobody will be bored. Oh, another question: when do the pictures of myself and the bride get taken? Do we do all the pics AFTER the wedding at a specified location, while all the guests either sit around and wait or show up at the shoot? I guess they'll have to show up there with us to be included in group shots right?
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May 9, 2008 21:37
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teamgod posted:Thanks guys; another question though: That wedding plan sounds great. I used to be a wedding photographer, and there are several ways you can do the picture. Typically, the photographer is present at both the ceremony and reception and does photography at each. 1. All of the posed shots of the bride and groom, family and wedding party are done before the ceremony somewhere nice on the grounds of the ceremony location. This is how I did it. 2. For bride and groom who don't want to see each other prior to the ceremony (required in my religion but often considered bad luck by some Christian sects) you do all of the posed shots prior to the ceremony except the ones with both the bride and groom. Those you do after the ceremony. 3. Do all of the posed shots at the reception, though after the ceremony people really just want to celebrate. 4. Do no posed shots, just candid. I have a list of shots not to be missed that I can PM you if you like.
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May 9, 2008 21:45
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teamgod posted:Oh, another question: when do the pictures of myself and the bride get taken? Do we do all the pics AFTER the wedding at a specified location, while all the guests either sit around and wait or show up at the shoot? I guess they'll have to show up there with us to be included in group shots right? Some of each. A photography package will probably include some pre-game shooting, bride getting ready, and suchlike. The actual ceremony, and then trying to get decent candid shots at the reception of at least the grandparents and the good looking friends for the album. Usually there is an hour or so between the end of the wedding and the beginning of the reception, to let people get to the venue, go to their hotels to change, take care of last minute details, and so on. So the photographer will probably grab you, your spouse, and your wedding party and parents for formal shots in that span. One thing that isn't standard, but I really liked was getting a big picture of everybody who showed up standing in front of the church with us, and that'd be something that would get done as soon as you're done with the receiving line on the way out of the church, in order to let the guests have a minute to get ready for the reception. Also, outdoor barbecue is the way to go. We got the university show gardens for 5 hours, as well as table and chair rental for 80 people, and the option of tents if the weather wasn't going to be good for something under 500$. Slo-Tek fucked around with this message at 21:49 on May 9, 2008 |
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May 9, 2008 21:46
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do what now posted:I have to be honest - according to my wedding planner, who is a recognized expert in the field and a consultant for a major wedding website, the A list/B list thing is still very common. She asked us if we wanted to do that, as many of her clients do, but we declined. From etiquettehell.com: "Myth: It's okay to have a reception and then have a "real" reception with the favored guests later that same evening. Not true: there shouldn't be an A and B list. Multiple receptions are okay for various reasons, but not one in which you skimp on some guests and pamper others." "I have an invitation faux pas by an otherwise very tasteful woman - which is why it so surprised me. From a well-to-do family, the bride nonetheless wanted to limit the number of guests at her wedding. Understandable. She started off by inviting close friends, but no spouses that she and her husband-to-be did not also consider to be close friends. A bit more of a stretch, but I'll grant her another more tentative - understandable. Then came the kicker. Her invitations were sent out in two waves: an A list, and a B list. The A list was sent out first, and once those guests had RSVP'd, the poor second choice B list candidates were offered a spot!" Common or not, it's in bad taste to have A and B lists. Actually, etiquette hell is a really good site for wedding stuff, I think they have a bunch of resources on there for suppliers and things. I don't mean to be all traditional and say that you have to do things a certain way, but I think being a gracious and thoughtful bride/groom is really important, and it seems like it's becoming more rare nowadays.
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May 9, 2008 21:54
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The best wedding planners will ultimately do what you ask them, no matter how impolite they think it is. My wedding planner says she does A/B weddings a lot. She didn't recommend that we do that (and we didn't), but it was an option.
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May 9, 2008 22:01
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ElanoreMcMantis posted:
This is the one I picked up: http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Simple-Stunning-Wedding-Organizer/Karren-Bussen/e/9781584793489/ teamgod - I don't think there's anything wrong with having a casual wedding. If that's what you want, I don't think anyone would turn it down over a sit down reception. Less hassle and planning!
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May 9, 2008 22:01
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Pegacorn posted:Her invitations were sent out in two waves: an A list, and a B list. The A list was sent out first, and once those guests had RSVP'd, the poor second choice B list candidates were offered a spot!" While I'm not planning a wedding just yet, I still don't see why this is SO AWFUL. I'd take a B list invitation as a compliment that I'm wanted at the wedding. Some people are priority, like family and really close friends. If you have a list of 500 people you want to invite, but can only afford dinner for 300, what's wrong with prioritizing? I may not want my great-aunt Mildred there instead of you, but if she's not invited, there is going to be hell to pay from my entire family. If she declines, then I get to invite you and have more friends there. It's not always a matter of first class friends versus second class friends. Chances are you've already refined the list as much as possible and feel guilty enough not being able to straight up invite everybody. I also don't understand the notion that being a gracious bride/groom means bending over backwards for people and spending a fortune to satisfy everyone and avoid insulting everyone you've ever met. If you think its rude then don't go, but its the bride and grooms wedding and they are already busting their butts and wallets trying to plan a nice evening to celebrate their marriage. If you seriously get your panties in a twist because you're a second cousin and you see the bride once a year, and you got a B List invitation, you need to grow up. Edit: I guess I'm just gonna be a rude bastard when I plan my wedding. Farewell Horizon fucked around with this message at 22:47 on May 9, 2008 |
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May 9, 2008 22:32
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BRAKE FOR MOOSE fucked around with this message at 07:44 on Jun 12, 2012 |
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May 9, 2008 23:26
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Farewell Horizon posted:While I'm not planning a wedding just yet, I still don't see why this is SO AWFUL. I'd take a B list invitation as a compliment that I'm wanted at the wedding. Some people are priority, like family and really close friends. If you have a list of 500 people you want to invite, but can only afford dinner for 300, what's wrong with prioritizing? I may not want my great-aunt Mildred there instead of you, but if she's not invited, there is going to be hell to pay from my entire family. If she declines, then I get to invite you and have more friends there. It's not always a matter of first class friends versus second class friends. Chances are you've already refined the list as much as possible and feel guilty enough not being able to straight up invite everybody. You can do whatever you want at your own wedding, but it's still in bad taste to prioritize your friends and family just for the sake of having the most extravagant party you can afford. Why not invite everyone who is important to you, but just have a cake and champagne reception that keeps within your budget? Being gracious means planning a party that not only makes you happy, but also shows respect and thoughtfulness for the people in your life, since the party is for them, after all. Your wedding reception is to celebrate your loved ones and thank them for being a part of your life. Your friends and family won't be insulted if they don't sit down to a four-course meal at your wedding; no one cares how elaborate or simple your reception is. People go to a lot of trouble to attend weddings, and often spend a lot of money on travel and gifts. They do it to see you! It's not like the less important people in your life go through less trouble to attend your wedding, so why make them feel less important? If you can't understand why this sentence: If you seriously get your panties in a twist because you're a second cousin and you see the bride once a year, and you got a B List invitation, you need to grow up. is an ugly thing to say, I don't know how to help you. Just because it is a special day for you doesn't mean you should feel entitled to behavior that you normally would consider in bad taste.
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May 9, 2008 23:35
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aneurysm posted:
In my experience as a bridesmaid, she'll only be occupied during the actual wedding & afterwards for a few minutes for pictures. During the reception she can eat & dance with you...unless you're going to one of those awful weddings where the bride makes all her bridesmaids sit at the table with her.
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May 10, 2008 00:29
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aneurysm posted:Anyway... a couple friends of mine are getting married. My fiancee is a bridesmaid. On the entire guest list, the only people I will know are the bride, groom, and my fiancee. Where the hell do I hang out during this thing? I'll certainly try to mingle a bit, but I'm not sure how many people will be in our age range that aren't in the wedding. For how much time is my fiancee likely to be occupied? Typically most involvement ends with the ceremony. As far as receptions go, traditionally the wedding party is "announced", so some time towards the end of the cocktail party your fiancee will disappear, everyone will sit down for the reception, the wedding party will be announced by the DJ and will walk into the reception, and then done. If she is the maid of honor, she may give a toast. But that's usually it (other than the flower toss, but she's already taken and should skip that  )These days, many couples are opting for "sweetheart tables" instead of "head tables". It used to be that the entire wedding party sat together at a head table, and the wedding party's spouses/fiancees/dates were seated elsewhere, but now these days the wedding couple is seated by themselves at a "sweetheart" table and the wedding party is seated with their guests, so you won't be all by yourself!
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May 10, 2008 00:34
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Pegacorn posted:just for the sake of having the most extravagant party you can afford. Why not invite everyone who is important to you, but just have a cake and champagne reception that keeps within your budget? I'm not trying to be rude, and I'm not trying to pick a fight, I just genuinely don't think its that big a deal and can't understand why it's such a faux pas, because I honestly wouldn't take offense to it. I'm really not an entitled person, and I don't think that having a wedding entitles you to behave rudely. I'm just not grasping this concept. I think it's a catch 22. If you put everyone on the same level, and to keep within your budget you only have cake and cocktails, you're going to get labelled as cheap. If you want to have dinner for your close friends and family, but can't feed all the people that you want to (extending invitations in the event that space becomes available), you're rude. The fact of the matter is, I would want to have dinner for everyone, but sometimes you don't get what you want. (And for the record I'm not talking about PAMPERING some people and not others. In my head I'm seeing dinner as being a simple 1 course meal with pop or wine.)
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May 10, 2008 06:49
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Been a while since I last checked this thread, I just wanted to thank the people for the suggestions. They all seem possible, just now I need to find the way to get my fiance to agree to it eventually. I know my family would consider it very important that I got married in a Roman Catholic ceremony (for tradition) at the church in Italy where my parents were married and I was baptised. So, if the dollar keeps this up, I'll probably do the suggestions I was given in this topic. Thanks once again!
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May 10, 2008 21:18
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Sorry to bump but need help. With regards to announcements/invitations: Is it tacky to send out announcements to people who aren't invited to the wedding? We want to keep it small - like 80 people but there a lot of people (friends of my parents, etc) that would like to know that I got married, etc. My sister says it's fine; my mother says it's just asking for gifts. Also, anyone who's already gotten married: I want some personal touches at my reception including large vases with Christmas ornaments (with our names and dates) as centerpieces. Is this something the caterer or florist can do? I also want stuff like mistletoe above the entrance to reception and candycanes in the napkin holders on the table. My mom seems to think that this stuff can't be done and that I have to just take what the caterer and florist offer.
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May 14, 2008 22:19
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jcschick posted:Sorry to bump but need help. With regards to announcements/invitations: Is it tacky to send out announcements to people who aren't invited to the wedding? We want to keep it small - like 80 people but there a lot of people (friends of my parents, etc) that would like to know that I got married, etc. My sister says it's fine; my mother says it's just asking for gifts. Announcements of the engagement can go to anybody. If you put the date of the wedding, it becomes a save the date card, and those only go to wedding guests. Florists can do things that aren't necessarily flowers. While flowers are obviusly their specialty, any good florist can do what you are asking. Some caterers can as well, for extra $$, although I bet they'd do candycanes in the napkins for free, as they place favors on the tables all of the time.
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May 14, 2008 22:25
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jcschick posted:Sorry to bump but need help. With regards to announcements/invitations: Is it tacky to send out announcements to people who aren't invited to the wedding? We want to keep it small - like 80 people but there a lot of people (friends of my parents, etc) that would like to know that I got married, etc. My sister says it's fine; my mother says it's just asking for gifts. My understanding in this scenario is that you send wedding announcements after you are married to people who weren't invited, to alert them to the fact that you are now married. I know when I was looking at invitations for my wedding, that was something you could purchase in addition to the regular invitations.
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May 14, 2008 22:34
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do what now posted:Announcements of the engagement can go to anybody. If you put the date of the wedding, it becomes a save the date card, and those only go to wedding guests. I think what my sister meant was a wedding announcement, not an engagement announcement (ex: We got married on December 5 blah blah blah)
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May 14, 2008 22:34
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jcschick posted:I think what my sister meant was a wedding announcement, not an engagement announcement (ex: We got married on December 5 blah blah blah) I wouldn't do it ("Hey - we got married but didn't invite you!") but I'm no expert. Also, we had wedding announcements in the newspaper and the Jewish Times, because it was more traditional around here and also less expensive.
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May 14, 2008 22:45
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