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Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
A game I had as a kid and vaguely misremember from time to time came up in conversation with someone earlier, and I suppose this is the place to ask. Does anyone remember a lackluster platformer from the SNES that had the choice of a (teenage?) boy or girl playable character, and involved travelling to different time periods, collecting different colors of keys in each level, and generally sucking as a game? I recall the first level being some sort of vague middle-ages/knights themed mess, but honestly my memory of the game is very scattered because I found it to be terrible and didn't play it much. I also recall that it was at least advertised on the box/box-art as being 'radical', a claim I didn't feel it lived up to.

I kind of hate that it tugs at my memory from time to time; I can remember Kangaroo and Pinball and Chuck Norris' Superkicks for the 2600, but this one random SNES game has just fallen into oblivion. I'm pretty sure it was just the kind of aggressively mediocre shovelware that time forgot.

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Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

Zanzibar Ham posted:

Okay, if this is right then wooow. Is this game Dream TV?

How did I come across this? I was watching a clip of highlights from a twitch stream tournament for terrible games. So yeah, if this is the game then apparently your feelings on it are completely vindicated.

My recollection was imprecise, but fuuuuuck that is exactly right, and I'm not surprised to find that it is as garbo as I recalled.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
Scorched Earth was one of the most mimicked/reverse-engineered/ripped-off game concepts of its time, and I'm pretty sure that Scorched Earth itself wasn't the first iteration of the idea either. I owned a copy of an extremely similar (albeit simpler) game on the 2600, and I've played it on an arcade cabinet.

So if you remember your copy having scrolling, it may very well have had scrolling.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

old chubbyknees posted:

There was a game from the 90s - I think it was educational. I remember there being human-like characters of different colours. Also, if you went to the basement, you could switch on the light, or light a match, and different scenes would play out.

Long shot, I know...

The way you're describing it makes it sound like the old animated-scene-toy genre of software (whatever it's actually called), that was weirdly massive throughout the 90's. Humongous Entertainment and their edutainment games like Freddi Fish and Putt Putt (and the many, many less-prestigious knockoffs), adventure games like The Ultimate Haunted House, hell, even functional 'work' software like the Creative Writer suite of programs (with its hideous McZee) was set up this way.

It's unfortunate in that I can think of several names off the top of my head that accurately fit the short description you gave. Without further details, it's hard to narrow it down.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(


In fact, just to be certain, I was pretty sure Creative Writer had a room like this, and looked it up: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czjIaqyi6-Y&t=272s In fairness, that's still a vague enough conceit for a scene it could still be something else.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
...so, in attempting to do a write-up for an ancient interactive fiction game I wanted to know the name of, I actually generated enough clues to find it myself; it was A Mind Forever Voyaging. In a small way this actually kind of frustrates me, because I still don't have any leads for the couple of open requests right now.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

MegaZeroX posted:

I'm looking for a game I played as a kid in the early to mid 2000s. It was a platformer where you controlled someone using a jetpack (or rocket, I don't remember), and was on PC. It was probably a flash game, but I'm not sure. I remember finding it hard, but that may be because I was a kid. IIRC you could only use the jetpack/rocket to move, and couldn't walk, but that may be wrong.

Can you remember any visual details, sound effects, what the menu looked like, anything like that?

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
Weird one just popped into my head, and I'm having a devil of a time trying to piece together the right keywords from my scattered memories to search for it. It's not a game I played myself, so I think I saw an LP of it.

It was a survival game, but the survival aspects of it were sort of muted, and it was as much or more about managing the mental health/teamwork of your island castaways, and it also had a map you reveal and some sort of story to it, I think. I believe you chose a morning activity for everyone and an evening activity for everyone, and you just sort of observed how that worked out, sometimes making decisions based on what people found while exploring. I vaguely recall the survivors being a set cast, who each had their own skills, preferences, and relationships with one another. Some of them arbitrarily hated one another for reasons I vaguely recall being stupid in context. The cast of survivors could build up skills based on what they did.

One of your main sources of food was fishing, which was an interesting part of the management sim since lazier survivors tend to like to fish, but fishing was also good for stress management in general. You could pair survivors off on certain activities specifically to try and improve their relationship with one another. Also, there was a WEIRD loving theme to the island, like it was tropical with pirate treasure and palm trees, but also scattered marble blocks which served as one of your resources, and what might be grecian deities meddling with your survival efforts.

It was also sort of built like a visual novel, and I recall that it was mostly static, drawn locations and portraits.

I don't know if all of these memories are accurate, and I don't know when I saw this, maybe early oughts. I don't even know why I was remembering it all of a sudden.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

Hyper Crab Tank posted:

It kinda sounds like the Island Mode post-game from Super Danganronpa 2. Don't google that game too much if you care about the actual story of the main game since it's real easy to spoil yourself.

Definitely not that, although it's sort of surprising if it has that many similarities.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

ponzicar posted:

Dead in Bermuda

Lots of good suggestions, but this appears to be the game in question. More recent than I had expected, I wonder if I originally saw the lp while sick and didn't have a good fix on it in memory; I am currently sick, so that would also help to explain it suddenly coming to mind.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
Holy moly. Had no idea of that game from the title or description, but as soon as I loaded up a video, I knew instantly that I had wasted hours as a kid trying to minmax it. I have no context at all for those memories other than the game itself. What a weird little artifact.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

Galick posted:

So I'm trying to remember the name of a game where you play as an AI/Supercomputer and the entire objective of the game is to take over the world, but you can't be noticed because they'd just come physically shut you down. I think it may have been a flash game - anyone have any ideas on what it is, or any games like it?

Singularity, or any number of flash knockoffs/similar games.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

Pierzak posted:

DOS game, SF strategy, the premise is that you return to the solar system after either some off-system scientific journey lasting hundreds of years and/or having spent said time in cryo-sleep (forgot which one) and you basically have to rediscover the solar system all over again and learn what the hell happened in the meantime.

And no, it's NOT Star Control 2 aka Ur-Quan Masters.

Anything else you can remember? Color palette, any particular phrases in the menu, layout of the screen? Some quick googling turns up a surprising number of games in the DOS era with similarities to your description.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

aniviron posted:

I don't remember that specific instance, but a math edutainment game makes me think Math Blaster.

You might not be aware just how wide the field is for 'math edutainment game'.

Will laugh if it is somehow Math Blaster, though.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

Gnoman posted:


The other was a point-and-click adventure game with some sort of edgy 90s title. The only scene I really remember is that you have to get past a grounds keeper, and the (or a) solution was to simply chop off his head with an axe, which I remember as being shockingly gory at the time.


I can't find this exact interaction, but I think this happens in Last Half of Darkness, and is at least mentioned in walkthroughs for the same. Does this look like the right game? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sB_SO3QNWk

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
I sort of have one, but I also sort of doubt that anyone's going to be able to give any insight.

Back in high school I would occasionally play on an online chatroom/game collection, somewhere around 2001 or 2002. The premise of the service was that it was a 'virtual space', sort of the awkward transition between the sort of 'virtual places' of the early internet and later social sites like Second Life. In effect I guess it was sort of a transitional virtual chatroom between programs like The Palace and sites like Club Penguin. In it, you would roam around a castle in faux 3d (think Wolfenstein in a browser window, or maybe the 3d maze windows screensaver) and you could chat in a sidebar or enter various doors into different games. The games included some standard two-player board games like chess, which I played occasionally, but my favorite game was some batshit tactical/strategy game.

I'm a little fuzzy on some of the mechanics of this game, but I believe you were offered a set of cards every turn and you accumulated energy every turn. Every card had an associated energy cost, so you could try to hold out to build up energy for more powerful cards, or you could play lots of little cards. I think at least some of the cards may have also contributed to your energy gain? In addition to this, your character and any creatures or machines you summoned would appear on a tactical grid and could be moved around to attack each other. Different units had different stats including movement speed, health, and attack. Of special note were vehicles, which were cards that could played as equipment for your commander, adding their stats to theirs, or played as independent units. One of the most powerful of these was pretty much literally just Robotnik's hovering escape vehicle from the early Sonic games, granting a ton of movement and some extra health allowing your commander to more effectively play keep-away. Other equipment cards included a personal shield that provided a ton of health, and various weapons that would add to your attack, including a light saber which added a ludicrous amount of damage and made your commander a one-unit army. Creature cards included weird tentacle monsters and mutants as well as a couple of generic killer robots and the aforementioned vehicles (which included a dune buggy, robotnik's hovering pod, and a giant mech). I believe there was also an acidic slime monster that was fairly potent. I'm pretty sure your commander could only have one vehicle at a time, and it would absorb damage first, granting you lots of protection at the cost of losing its extra stats once it was destroyed.

You could focus on kitting your commander out to wade into battle and assassinate the enemy commander, or simply try to drown them in summons, or something in-between, but I believe a lot of it was down to your luck on card draws.

The graphics were all scribbly MSPaint nonsense and clearly either made for the game or stolen from generic icon libraries and modified. The whole thing likely ran on Java. I believe there was some sort of ranking system based on your performance in each game in the larger virtual chatroom castle, complete with tiers you could climb up and possibly icons that could appear next to your name if you were a top-ranked player. I have a vague recollection that it had some incredibly generic name like 'gamescastle2002', but no idea on the specifics. My memory is that the various games and the service itself began to rapidly break down over time with updates to java and browser security, and that it was gone in a couple of years. If that part of my recollection is accurate, this fleeting half-rear end description might be all the memorial something so ephemeral gets, but I'd love to know if anyone could at least put a name to this half-remembered mess.

Edit:

Small twofer! I have refound and then reforgotten the name of this one at least once, so it might be easier to find. Old DOS game, a sidescrolling platformer where you were an Indiana Jones-esque adventurer looking to infiltrate a pyramid. You had to manage a limited supply of spears to kill...I think mummies and bats?...while going through level by level of platforming. There was treasure and extra lives to collect as well, and traps like false floors, crushers, arrow traps, and upright spikes. The game had INCREDIBLY simple graphics (spikes were just a few columns of vertical pixels that were red on the end, the background was black, pyramid tiles were primarily one shade of yellow, your adventure was a goofy-looking stick figure man in a hat), and completely bullshit hitboxes. I believe each level was a single screen with no scrolling. Pharoah masks were one of the big-ticket treasure items. I think it was a sequel, or at least pretended to be part of a series if it wasn't. Just something weird I remembered from my childhood after writing up the above.

Shady Amish Terror fucked around with this message at 07:45 on Jun 4, 2020

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
Wow, those two are...shockingly similar, but the one I played was Pharaoh's Tomb, yeah. Thanks! In hindsight I could have also mentioned the horrible struggle of lining up jumps and the fact that it's probably where I learned the word 'anteroom', but I'm happy to be able to find out what it was regardless.

...and looking it up, it got re-released on...Steam??? Wild.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

dads_work_files posted:

Jagex Games Castle/Pyramid was the online service and Cyber Wars was the game. I used to play it a lot around that time! Maybe we played against each other. I seem to remember it being the first and last time I was competitive in a multiplayer strategy game

Wow, I really wasn't expecting an answer for that one, thanks! And, ha, yeah, maybe. I sunk...an unconscionable number of hours into that game.

E:

The Joe Man posted:

I hate this loving game with a passion but I sunk SO MANY HOURS into it

I know that exact feeling, yes. The game...has its high points and its low points. So, so many low points.

Reminds me I had a similar relationship with Kingdom of Kroz, which was a very fun and creative game, but I remember being very punishing and difficult, at least to my younger self. ...or, looking at a video, I'm now reminded that level 1 immediately throws you into the thick of a huge chaotic fight and your 'tutorial' is in learning how to actually manage that situation. Lawlp.

Shady Amish Terror fucked around with this message at 01:08 on Jun 5, 2020

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
Demo discs are probably the worst for this simply because there were thousands and many of those projects probably never got off the ground. I unfortunately have no input on the mass of memories of various helicopter games, I imagine it was a very popular genre.

...speaking of which, I was reminded, sometime in the late 90's or early aughts, one of the major pc games magazines had demo discs that were presented as a virtual space in the form of an fmv game, where you were supposedly entering some kind of secret agency/hidden journalism bunker(???). This eventually culminated in some sort of weird episodic mystery where you were looking at e-mails and, I think, listening to voice mails to try and solve a mystery involving the disappearance of someone, which I think eventually became an ARG as it bled into outside e-mail contacts and the like. I think it may have simply been PC Gamer magazine, so...ah, wait, gently caress. Answered another one by the act of writing it out. It was indeed PC Gamer, the 'missing person' was probably the editor who actually left the company right after the fmv game demo disc format came out, and shortly thereafter they dropped the fmv format altogether so the 'mystery' was never actually resolved.

...wow. The wiki article states that these fmv demo discs also introduced 'Coconut Monkey', a PC Gamer mascot that was a coconut carved to be a monkey, based on a common tourist trap trinket. According to the article, the character claims their mother was a coconut and their father was 'a Sri Lankan rat basher', so, uh, loving yikes

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
I'm happy that someone brought up Dragon Court, because wow, that was a memory coming back I didn't know I had. Though now I am a little concerned with just how much time I must have put into that game over the course of months.

E: Wait, that one brought back something else. I have a memory of what I think might have been an early flash game or series of flash games set in the Australian outback. I remember the main character being...essentially whatever the australian version of a redneck is? It was broken up into different games and modes of play. I remember not disliking something that had to do with a didgeridoo, but the only game I strongly recall playing was a mode where you just drove a truck or something similar around running over cane toads for points. It feels kind of incongruous to me, because I have the weird sense it might have been intended to be edutainment?

Shady Amish Terror fucked around with this message at 00:57 on May 23, 2021

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

Hwurmp posted:

Lenny Loosejocks

That was prompt. Thanks!

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(
Wow, another game I had no memory of playing until seeing the footage linked here. Yeah, I recall Sopwith being very cool but also very, very difficult for little child me.

Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

someone awful. posted:

sort of asking for my dad; between us both we can't remember what the heck this game was called. he played it a ton in the 90s, it was a turn-based strategy map game kind of thing, with online multiplayer -- i'm pretty sure it was play-by-email and games would go for multiple days. it was historical i think (like, as opposed to fantasy/scifi i mean -- i remember there were tanks) i'm pretty sure it was a free game he downloaded, and not something he bought. iirc the graphics were a little primitive, or at least 2d/flat.

i know this is barely anything to go off of. :sweatdrop: i was pretty young.

Understandable, but do any other details come to mind? Play-by-email was intensely popular throughout the 80's and 90's, and while it's not difficult to pull up listings of PBeM games from devotees then and now, I believe from scant memory and perusing a couple such lists that there are probably literally dozens of military sims that might fit the description of turn-based, simple graphics, and having tanks. I'm assuming a DOS or Windows system?

Fake edit for context:
Here's a small list of a handful of abandonware PBM titles that have thumbnail previews which might help to at least contextualize the spread of options. https://www.abandonwaredos.com/abandonware-list.php?tp=1&kword=318
Do any of those at least capture the general vibe?

Meanwhile, a late 90's text fanzine, unchanged from the pre-WWW days, had a list of over 200 fairly popular PBM games with about 20 of them being directly war strategy games, and wikipedia has a list of PBM games...that's in the low thousands, I think. Dads playing war by e-mail was pretty popular for a couple of decades.

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Shady Amish Terror
Oct 11, 2007
I'm not Amish by choice. 8(

BaronVanAwesome posted:

Pretty sure I’ve posted this guess a couple times successfully before, I think you played Metal Knights/NetMetal.

someone awful. posted:

oh my god it was Metal Knights. Thank you so much, this was going to bug me for a million years.

Amazing called shot.

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