Achewood Thread 12: Hey, Look! We're Back! What Happened?!

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Achewood Thread 12: Hey, Look! We're Back! What Happened?!

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Total brain thing!

# ¿ Oct 6, 2009 13:51

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# ¿ May 4, 2024 20:47

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Chris Onstad posted:

Lee was down: he opened up a bit and "talked bitches." He was also downtrodden. To a hooligan like Todd, Lee was right for adoption.

These, are my Thoughts of Tonight.

Sorry about the week off. I really don't know where those days went. There was just...no jazz in my jazz instrument. Its spit valves smelt of oil, and were absent any human moisture.

That Shell 10W40 Daiquiri does you no favors.

# ¿ Nov 9, 2009 12:42

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

iphone app where you sing about rear end in pants then use the accelerometer to make Ray do backflips to the piano

# ¿ Feb 13, 2010 15:40

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

I don't think anyone has ever condensed the nature of a statue down to something as little and as precise as "it honors your situation".

e: wait, "mom and mom"?!

# ¿ Feb 18, 2010 21:24

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Silentman0 posted:

Mom and Mom's hall bathroom.

I just thought there was some "Raymond's Two Mommies" arch I had inexplicably missed.

# ¿ Feb 19, 2010 14:17

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Connellingus posted:

Oh, I've definitely heard "firing on all cylinders." I just didn't know "one cylinder" was common.

That's a pretty low state of being if you are a metaphorical inline four. Perhaps Philippe is a V-twin?

# ¿ Mar 2, 2010 11:51

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Coincidentally, a Stop-free In-motion ~~Slopless~~ Reduced-Slop ~~re-percolating~~ ~~Sealable~~ Closable Convenience Tank was featured in Automotive Insanity the other day.

# ¿ Apr 8, 2010 14:56

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Skadi posted:

Forget that, what are those blue nubs on the wheel? Bling?

It's like a prayer bead thing. You flip them in a regular tempo, when you have gone all the way around you have reached the ideal bowel time. If you're still not done, you need to look into your diet.

I don't think the neatly disposable bags saves this installation. At a family outing: "Kids, when I stand up I need you to quickly tie it up and put in a new one. I had a lot of mashed potatoes last night." "It's hard to wipe when it's so cramped, can you check if I missed any spots?" and so on.

# ¿ Apr 9, 2010 09:00

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Teodor's middle-class conservative family values are carried only as cargo from his own adolescence, not built up through own experience. So his misguided sense of an otter's true home is what got punched in the erection and fell to the floor with a slide whistle sound.

# ¿ Apr 30, 2010 09:22

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

bgaesop posted:

I am deeply unnerved

Me too. Mostly about what will happen in the next strip but more specifically if it involves the adverb "deeply" in a way which will make Teodor want to go in a shower and never come out.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2010 16:40

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Come to think of it, quite a few penii have been featured in achewood. The skateboarding cock, the straight up roasted ding dong, the furious ding dong, Pat's Mexican Magical Erection, the recently mentioned naked fighting and quite a few more. I think.

I don't think this says anything about Mr Onstad other than he appreciates the important effect a penis can have on the narrative, even if the story is not about the penis itself. It's a MacGuffin with nuts and pubes.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2010 14:37

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

"Good, I can feel your anger. I am defenseless. Take your ________. Strike me down with all of your hatred and your journey towards the dark side will be complete!"

# ¿ Jul 12, 2010 22:16

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

One late evening when I was really tired I suddenly realized the dialogue could be translated meows.

# ¿ Jul 24, 2010 15:43

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Thanks to that Pinky and the Brain parody, I finally realized Welles is narrating a TV ad which he is watching while reading. I always thought it was a radio ad and the talking of being in snow and so on made no sense. I thought Welles was imagining them based on context or that the cans of peas had snow on them.

I feel this is a fairly precise gauge of the depths of my ignorance.

# ¿ Sep 4, 2010 19:05

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

The tension remains. Are there still boners present in the van?

# ¿ Oct 5, 2010 14:05

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Fillerbunny posted:

Post-fire Bill Murray kind of reminded me of Cartilage Head. Do you think that's what Lynch's movie is really about? If it's not, shouldn't it be?

If David Lynch saw Cartilage Head, he would say "Well poo poo. This is what I've been trying to do all along."

# ¿ Oct 20, 2010 01:58

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

I thought "gaolbreak" was hilarious. I was this close to tweeting Stephen Fry asking if he's gaolbreaked his iphone 4.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2011 00:35

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Locus posted:

Dong-razzled.

I thought it was when you were all :swoon:

about penises.

# ¿ Feb 11, 2011 21:28

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

The Achewood Facebook group is the worst group on the ugliest site. I was a member, which possibly contributed to said condition, but I posted this thing which Chris Onstad clicked like on and fooled some vulnerable people. I repost it here out of ignoble pride more than anything else.

quote:

The comment about Waterbury and diaper/nappy reminded me of some amazing facts about Achewood's historical connections to England specifically but also the low countries and France.
Achewood was a large monastic estate with Anglo-Saxon roots in Nottinghamshire, England, south of today's Nottingham (the forest to the north, which is more famous, is called Sherwood).
Its name comes from the city of Aachen in today's Germany, near the Belgian border, which had strong ties to England then. After the Norman conquest, the Anglo-Saxons disappeared and it became a more marginalized expat community, but Flemish ties and culture remained strong and many monks from the low countries came there. One of these cultural traits was the brewing of pale lager, which was very different than the darker ale the rest of the country drank. It was known as "star beer" due to the fizzy bubbles compared to the flat ale. They even supplied beer to the royal household under Richard II.
In 1433 the low countries were united under the Duchy of Burgundy, who was in conflict with Henry VI and thus marginalized the community even more. In the late 1400s hostility increased and their only lifeline was Charles, the wealthy count of Artois (today in northern France near the Belgian border) who under the guise of beer export supported them financially. He was also a famed breeder of cats which was very unusual when nobility was supposed to have dogs and hunt deer. There is one on his arm in every portrait.
The luck of the Achewood monastery finally ran out under Henry VIII when all monasteries were dissolved and many of the monks were executed. Before that the monks had unsuccessfully lobbied Rome to make count Charles a saint, but one of their many other tributes survives to this day as a brand. The star beer dedicated to the rich, cat-breeding count of Artois - Stella Artois.

Ola fucked around with this message at 15:06 on Oct 4, 2014

# ¿ Oct 4, 2014 14:43

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

I almost only drink artificially sweetened soda. I never get headaches from it, nor any other negative reaction. Natural Chardonnay on the other hand...

# ¿ Jul 5, 2020 11:32

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

You can choose to read "wipe my rear end" as "let's grow old together".

# ¿ Jul 14, 2020 11:12

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

A good sign of great art is that the artist lost the ability to make it.

# ¿ Aug 12, 2020 23:04

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

Tori Amos is always here, one way or another.

# ¿ Aug 21, 2020 12:23

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

I wonder if there's enough schools available to separate children from different economic backgrounds, in the world of the small animals that live human-like lives next to the normal humans.

# ¿ Aug 21, 2020 16:33

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

I don't like wearing factory fresh clothes, I always wash them after purchase. There's something about the production dust and chemicals that makes them feel weird. A year with only unwashed factory boxers would drive me nuts. But perhaps not that nuts.

# ¿ Aug 23, 2020 21:46

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# ¿ May 4, 2024 20:47

Ola: Jul 19, 2004

I wonder if Chris still reads this thread. I hope he doesn't.

# ¿ Aug 28, 2020 01:18

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Achewood Thread 12: Hey, Look! We're Back! What Happened?!