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On the whole my gripe with corporate in general is this: I work to live. They'd rather it was the other way around. That pretty much covers any and all corporate complaints, because most of the reasons we dislike working for corporate are to do with our employers expecting us to behave like our jobs are the most important things in our lives.
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Apr 21, 2010 23:23
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Millstone posted:Cool! Passive-aggressiveness is definitely the way to a successful career, rear end in a top hat. Cool! Ignoring documented policy and/or procedures and throwing a hissyfit when it backfires is definitely the way to a successful career, rear end in a top hat. Both of those actions are stupid. Unfortunately the second one often seems to work. edit: I should also point out that I don't think BullProofMonk was being passive aggressive and you really ought to look up the definition of that term. He told the guy what the procedure was, and the procedure is there both to protect the company and to cover his own rear end. If whatever this change was (to the production environment - you know, the one which make you haemorrhage cash if it breaks) goes wrong and the only documentation is that "Bob told me to do it while I was taking a piss" then who's going to get the poo poo for it? Not Bob, that's for sure. V--- this too rolleyes fucked around with this message at 23:42 on Apr 21, 2010 |
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Apr 21, 2010 23:38
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I think the fact that I now find Dilbert funny proves that my job in a large multinational company has ruined my mental health: I'll admit it, I laughed.
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May 5, 2010 18:24
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Our execs delivered our corporate-set yearly performance objectives so late that we only have 5 months before the end-of-year evaluation. Sure hope you can achieve 12 months worth of improvement in 5, because the execs sure as hell aren't going to take the blame when everyone fails to meet the targets!
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Jan 30, 2011 07:00
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I suppose it's harder to see the funny side when so much of your time has been wasted, but as an outsider that seems like sweet comedy justice - he proposed something stupid, did something stupid and then got called out on doing something stupid. Hopefully he also got busted for wasting 4 months multiplied by however many manhours of company time on something stupid too.
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Mar 8, 2011 13:13
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Timo posted:What the loving gently caress (gently caress) is going on in her head? Repeat these three little words after me: hostile work environment.
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Mar 17, 2011 07:34
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Crowley posted:Work to live, don't live to work. This is exactly what I was going to post after reading Timo's latest update. If you live to work it needs to be because you love your job and it's beneficial to do so. If you're putting in hours of unpaid overtime for no foreseeable reward, if you're working to the point that you're killing yourself with stress, if you're neglecting your partner/family/friends/social life then you're doing it wrong. For most of us the healthy option is working to live.
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Mar 24, 2011 10:16
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legsarerequired posted:legsarerequired posted:the company forced everyone to attend an hour-long pep rally during our lunch hour. Also, the second shift employees (who work 1pm-10pm) were screwed over because their lunch hour was moved to the very beginning of their shift, rather than being in the middle (at 5 pm, or 6pm). The result was a bunch of really upset and hungry employees who didn't have time to do more than snack between calls during the rest of their their scheduled shift. Do you get paid for your lunch hour? If not I'm pretty sure this is illegal. Even if your lunch hour is paid this could still be illegal for the 2nd shift (depending on what state you're in I think?) as there are usually mandated breaks after x hours of working. Plus they at least have to give you time to eat. rolleyes fucked around with this message at 08:54 on Mar 27, 2011 |
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Mar 27, 2011 08:52
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Rodent Mortician posted:That depends entirely on where you work. Some states are "at-will" and they can fire you because they don't like the color of your shirt and there's zippo you can do about it. There's a difference between "at-will" and "can fire you for any reason" though. It would still be illegal to fire someone for reporting sexual harassment but, as you say, obviously the workaround is just to find some minor thing and go "welp, looks like it's not working out - sorry!". There'd still potentially be a case to be made there, but in most cases the person dismissed doesn't have the resources to lawyer up. The system works! 
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Mar 28, 2011 18:29
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Are you really trying to tell me that there's a jurisdiction in the US where it's legal to straight up say "I am firing you for reporting sexual harassment"?
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Mar 28, 2011 19:56
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Ghostnuke posted:Started my new job today. Everyone has Herman Miller Aerons. Curse you. I have something which even Office Depot would be to embarrassed to sell.
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Jun 17, 2011 10:37
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If I know corporate the prototype will then be put into production immediately, resulting in you visiting this SH/SC thread frequently.
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Jul 15, 2011 14:15
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4448. I use my inbox as the repository for 'stuff which wasn't automatically filtered elsewhere'. To put it in perspective about 7-10 emails a day end up in the inbox, the rest never even touch it. I work on several projects simultaneously and each project has its own folder and subfolders so I've got a whoooole lotta rules going on. The reason I have so many emails in my inbox is that I haven't deleted anything since I started here several years ago as I've yet to run out of space. Most of the stuff I receive is tiny and my total mailbox size is ~360MB.
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Aug 26, 2011 14:47
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^^^ and you too jesus. These people won't stop unless their (ex) employees hold them accountable.awesome-express posted:"I will be harsh to you since that helps productivity" - hostile working environment, illegal. "You drink too much water, stop walking to the water cooler every hour, that destroys the sense of urgency we got going here and we can't have that". - not strictly illegal but the HSE would definitely have something to say about it. "We don't do lunch, you've got 10 minutes to run down to the store" - very, very illegal. "You eat your food in front of your workstation" - illegal, your breaks are your time and the company can't impose any restrictions on where you go. "Write 100 placement emails to these linguists, you've got 10 minutes, you need to be like a robot" - not illegal but lovely. "Leaving at 5.30 is too early" - not illegal but could be dicey depending on what your contract said. Definitely lovely though. "You get frustrated easily, this position is not for you" - unfair dismissal and, in combination with the above, constructive dismissal. You should contact a solicitor and sort out a tribunal. During my training, I asked him a bunch of questions and he smacked a chair near me because "I had already explained this". - Hostile working environment again. Seriously, if this was even remotely recent you've got a good chance of getting a judgement against them. UK employment law is one of the best, especially compared to the States. rolleyes fucked around with this message at 12:25 on Sep 28, 2011 |
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Sep 28, 2011 12:20
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awesome-express posted:I got terminated 2 weeks ago. Should I really seek legal help from a solicitor? What is the possible outcome? Well, it would probably go to an employment tribunal assuming it's as clear cut as you say it is and then it's up to the tribunal to decided whether you deserve any damages and, if so, how much. The fact you were fired early on (1.5 months) suggests you were in a probationary period which would decrease the burden on the employer in terms of legitimate reasons for firing you but there's still a whole lot of bullshit going on according to your post. For example, there are very strict rules on both your lunch break (depends on your daily hours) and breaks from working with computer monitors (generally 5 mins for every hour, often combined into two 15 minute breaks by employers). That's ignoring all the abuse/threats as well. Really, you shouldn't rely on my advice though because as ever IANAL. If you're a union member, talk to your union. If you're not, find a solicitor who specialises in employment disputes and see if they'll give you a free consultation and go from there. Bonus points if you can back any of this up with physical evidence (emails, etc). Edit: Also, phone these guys: http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Dl1/Directories/DG_10010857 Edit2: This is also worth a quick read: http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Employment/ResolvingWorkplaceDisputes/DG_10027991 rolleyes fucked around with this message at 14:56 on Sep 28, 2011 |
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Sep 28, 2011 14:50
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I honestly can't imagine continuing to work in an environment like that anyway, so you're probably better off out of it. I know it can be tricky to explain being fired in an interview or on a CV, but in this case I honestly don't think you need to. You were only there for a month and a half and (I'm assuming) you wouldn't want to use them for anything other than a formal reference (i.e. not a character reference). Simply state the dates on your CV and when you're asked about it during an interview just explain your role. If they ask why you left, you can say that you weren't enjoying the job*. If they press you (or ask for a character reference from that job) you can explain that you didn't have a good relationship with your boss and so would prefer to provide an alternative. However tempting it is, don't bad-mouth your previous employer to a prospective employer - they're not interested in details of disagreements in your previous role and would worry that you might bad-mouth them at a later date. If they are really digging for details from you then you may have to provide a brief overview of what went wrong but try to keep it professional. *If the job is similar to the one you're currently interviewing for, this is a bit trickier and you will have to provide some details in order to show that while the work was what you wanted the people were not. rolleyes fucked around with this message at 15:40 on Sep 28, 2011 |
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Sep 28, 2011 15:38
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Cluricaun posted:"Right Sizing" I've heard this one before, and I'm struggling to think of a term which is more insulting.  Great news honey, I've been right-sized!
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Oct 20, 2011 15:12
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I think it's something of a universal truth that the larger the company the more spineless internal communication about 'bad stuff' becomes.
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Oct 20, 2011 23:06
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Necc0 posted:Assuming you're in the pharma industry, aren't they still setting record profits? As someone working in the pharma industry, I can tell you it's actually been really hard for smaller parmacos to do drat near anything since the start of 'the recession'. Developing any new drug requires absurd amounts of money in loans and no-one wants to do any lending, so many small pharmacos have folded or been bought out. Hell, even GSK gutted whole sectors of their workforce not long ago. People need to remember that for every Viagra there are tens if not hundreds of failed attempts, and each one of those attempts can last anywhere up to 6 years depending on how far advanced the trial is. Sure, Viagra earned Pfizer billions, but they lay out billions on a yearly basis most of which will never result in a profit. Basically being a profitable pharmaco is at least 50% blind luck and tends to rely on some institution being willing to lend you a few million dollars even after they've had that explained to them. rolleyes fucked around with this message at 23:58 on Oct 25, 2011 |
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Oct 25, 2011 23:56
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^^^ Goddamn, "Dear Penthouse". Sundae posted:Yeah fair enough, the short version of my point is mainly that research and clinical trials can run to hundreds of millions for a single drug with no guarantee of success. Some people have this notion that PharmaCos (big or small) are inherently evil because they patent their drugs and then use that to jack up prices, when what they're not understanding is that it's necessary to recoup not just the costs of the individual drug being developed (many drugs only turn a profit in the last couple of years of their 12 year patent) but also to fund future research and to offset losses from failed compounds and/or trials. On the other hand, I totally agree that we should stop dicking over poor nations especially with regard to Africa. At least things have improved a bit in that regard in the last decade or so.
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Oct 26, 2011 16:52
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I feel you. I'm involved in managing trials rather than research, but you wouldn't believe (well, actually, you probably would) some of the interdepartmental politicking which goes on in my company and our parent company. Sometimes I feel like sending an email to the all staff mailing list just to remind people that: a) We're on the same drat side b) We're supposed to be solving world problems, not infighting All large corps are the same, it would seem.
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Oct 26, 2011 18:56
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Blue_monday posted:People walk up 3 floors to ask me stupid stuff that could be either in an email or phoned. I get this but for technical information on a system I was involved in designing. Thankfully at the time I was able to persuade management that it'd be a good use of a couple of days of my time to write up a manual, so my response is always "Have you read the manual? No? Ok, here's where you can find it - get back to me if you can't find the information you need" and management will back me up on this as it would otherwise be a huge waste of my time. Nevertheless, the same people will ask inane questions (often the same inane questions they've asked before) over and over again, presumably out of some hope that I will eventually crack and do their job for them.
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Nov 19, 2011 14:45
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Pleads posted:Dear company: What's the loving point of pushing 25% sales growth if your customer satisfaction drops and your employees are quitting because they don't want to have to work 50 hour weeks so some douchebag in sales can make an extra few grand each year? This is how I've felt of late, because it's happening more and more. I hate being behind. Even if it's out of my hands. Even if it's entirely someone else's fault. Even when I've made everyone who needs to be aware, aware. Because damnit, it's my project I feel responsible for it and being put in a position where I'm forced to be late makes me very uncomfortable, which then turns into anger directed at my employer for doing that to me. Gah!
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Nov 22, 2011 22:02
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I like the over-emphasis on 'planned' too. No no, you see it's all fine - although our current situation is the result of a massive reorg due to panic, it's all planned so that's ok. Everyone be cool.
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Nov 23, 2011 14:36
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Iron Crowned posted:In other news, we have a new buzzword, that our parent company overlords have used to replace "downsizing," and that word is "resizing." We've had 'rightsizing' before. It really doesn't get any more insulting than that.
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Dec 1, 2011 18:50
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Sundae posted:Yes it does. (FYI: Anywhere with out-of-place capital letters in the rest of my post, that's your typical HR slogan.) You win. Do these idiots ever stop to think about the fact that real people have to hear this asinine 'conflict avoidance' language in a situation which can be life changing*? It's just utterly  *Answer: "no" edit: I think what riles me and others most about the term 'Rightsized' is that it's a positive term used to describe a (very) negative action, implying that you ought to somehow be grateful for being laid off. At least most of the other nonsense terms are still negative ones. rolleyes fucked around with this message at 14:45 on Dec 6, 2011 |
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Dec 6, 2011 14:28
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Cup of Hemlock posted:Our office just posted a company-wide flyer for the HR department. It tells how employees can check their payroll status online. Our place switched to something like this about 18 months ago and simultaneously stopped providing paper payslips. The result? Everyone now prints out their payslips from the website on company printers. Usually the colour lasers. That's some fiiiine budgeting work there Lou.
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Dec 10, 2011 17:15
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^^^ Sounds as though your place is more similar to my previous employer than my current one then. davebo posted:I work for a small family run company and the boss' daughter is in charge of organizing the holiday party. It was supposed to be last Sunday but most of us had to work late Saturday or on Sunday so she rescheduled it for mid-January. Two years ago I think it even got pushed back to February. I certainly don't envy the corporate environment but movies/tv always seem to paint a picture of wacky sexual/drunk hijinks at corporate xmas parties. Nothing fun like that happens with 5 nerds at their boss' house in February. Kind of depends on the size of the party and the sort of people working for the company, or those who want to go to the party at any rate. My current place books venues with a capacity of a couple hundred, tends to fill them, and the events are usually comedy gold for the reasons you mentioned (and I work with a great bunch of people). On the other hand, I've been to similar size corporate parties where everyone sat around awkwardly. A lot of it comes down to how 'management-like' your management wants to be at the event. At my current place they realise people need to blow off steam so really don't care so long as we don't trash the place or steal the fixtures. rolleyes fucked around with this message at 21:33 on Dec 12, 2011 |
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Dec 12, 2011 21:30
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Ah, ours are usually child-free which helps with the hijinks.
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Dec 12, 2011 22:13
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A mandatory party is not a party. I'm guessing you're in the US? Regardless, it takes real corporate skill to take an event which is supposed to be about socialising, legislate the fun out of it to such an extent that there's a worry people won't go, and then decide the solution to that is to force people to go. This year ours runs from 8pm til 3am, includes at least some free (alcoholic) drink, free food and has a casino. Nobody's getting fired unless they break the law or do something spectacularly stupid to a member of staff several levels above them, and even then it's kinda hard to argue gross misconduct (the requirement for immediate termination in the UK; just about everything else has to go through disciplinary processes) when you're not being paid to be there and therefore are not on company time. I guess I'm lucky that we're generally less straight-laced about that sort of thing over here and, while my job is often stressful and annoying, the people I work with are up for a laugh almost without exception - and that includes upper management. e: corrected late night predictive text fails rolleyes fucked around with this message at 13:46 on Dec 13, 2011 |
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Dec 12, 2011 23:59
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That seems like another ridiculous choice. I'm sure you'll 'network' (or whatever it is corporate hope people will do at christmas parties) brilliantly while sat in silence in a dark room for a couple of hours.
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Dec 13, 2011 23:02
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FogHelmut posted:it's going to take you 6 emails to get this cryptic information out of me because I communicate in non-committals and non-answers. I know a guy who does this but for different reasons - he doesn't want to avoid responsibility, he wants you to beg him for his awesome knowledge. He will reply to the bare minimum and ignore any implied or indirect questions, forcing you to ask again and again.
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Dec 14, 2011 18:24
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psydude posted:Back on the topic of holiday parties real quick: we just had a girl get fired because of the office party last Thursday. This is a great example of why to avoid holiday office parties, folks. Doesn't that rather depend on what she did? And surely then the real message is 'this is a great example of why to avoid holiday office parties if you're not capable of handling your alcohol or knowing the expected boundaries, folks".
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Dec 19, 2011 15:29
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As a heathen non-believer I really couldn't care less about receiving stuff with religious overtones - it's still a nice gesture. If someone wants to give me a Happy Diwali card next time it rolls around then fine, and some of our staff of Indian origins do bring in food to share and so on around that time. I think it's more of a touchy subject for you guys in the states though, hence 'holidays' rather than 'christmas'. The other stuff is dodgy though. We have very similar policies because it's incredibly easy to trip over an anti-bribery/corruption law by doing something seemingly innocuous.
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Dec 21, 2011 18:42
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Keetron posted:This week I had an interview where I was asked the priceless question: "What does your ex-wife consider your best quality?" What the gently caress. If ever there's an example of a good time to walk out, this is it.
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Dec 30, 2011 15:22
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Also worth considering: would you really want to work for a company which has just down itself willing to disregard employment law before you're even in the door.
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Jan 8, 2012 20:02
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^^^ Pretty much. legsarerequired posted:How is anyone supposed to answer a question like this? It doesn't seem like there could be any correct answer, besides continuing to work at a pre-existing job I suppose. Comedy answer: lie, and tell them what they want to hear. If they find out and call you out on it later, lawsuit/tribunal/investigation time. Obviously that's a terrible idea if you actually need a job, but if there are any millionaires out there who fancy giving us something back then calling out lovely hiring practices in that manner would be a hidden camera show that I'd watch.
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Jan 8, 2012 23:06
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dvision posted:back and forth with Finance Ah, finance. I was seconded to one of our offices in Asia for a couple of months last year and finance wanted me to send all my expense receipts back to my home office in the mail. Apart from the general insanity of this, bear in mind that our expenses don't get paid until finance have have the receipts and the country I was in is notorious for its unreliable/slow/corrupt postal system. I flat out said that if that was the case then I wasn't going, as I wasn't going to have my personal finances held hostage to a postal system where you may as well just flip a coin to achieve a similar delivery rate. It still took the involvement of the director of my overall department to get them to relent and accept scanned receipts by email, which was my original suggestion. Sure enough, despite accepting the scans and paying me, when I got back they kicked off again claiming they'd told us they wanted the hardcopies on my return (bullshit). Since they were on a dump a few thousand miles away I sent them a zip file with all of the scans in it and asked whether they could just print them. This once again led to the director getting involved to get them to accept it. I understand finance has policies for a reason but gently caress me, they need to be kept up to date with the nature of the business. And don't then make up some bullshit months after we reach an alternative agreement. rolleyes fucked around with this message at 10:17 on Jan 15, 2012 |
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Jan 15, 2012 10:15
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Ghostnuke posted:My boss emailed me asking for a bullet point list of my 2011 accomplishments. I'm having trouble coming up with anything beyond "Gave you hundreds of ideas that are 100% guaranteed to improve business, yet you refuse to implement". So ignore the fact that he did nothing with them. For the ones which weren't taken up but you think would still genuinely be relevant and effective, go with something like: "Identified and brought to the attention of management <whatever you suggested> which has the potential to save the business <x> / improve efficiency <y>% / bring in additional business through <z>." Corporate. It's all about playing the game by spinning your words.
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Jan 31, 2012 11:28
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Well, as the VP you could probably just fire him...  More seriously, if the politics are that bad you might just have to suck it up. I know it's the little things which can drive people mad but really, in the grand scheme of things, there are bigger problems than that.
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Feb 23, 2012 10:16
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