Corp Megathread: A box covered with the dust of years, labeled "EMPLOYEE SUGGESTIONS"

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Corp Megathread: A box covered with the dust of years, labeled "EMPLOYEE SUGGESTIONS"

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downout: Jul 6, 2009

Volmarias posted:

I've taken Mental Health days, where I'm sick (of this bullshit). They're my sick days, I'll take them.

Oh hell yes. I do this at least a few times or more every year. The way I see it they're either going to get my shittiest day or give me some time off.

# ¿ Jan 26, 2021 20:34

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# ¿ May 22, 2024 18:00

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Anyone have any suggestions how best to handle a very underqualified coworker with the same job title? I'm amazed my manager hasn't seemed noticed it; maybe they have. But I'm getting really frustrated with the level of hand-holding I'm having to do for rudimentary problem solving. Most recently it was hand-holding for an issue in this person's self-professed "strong suit" area (which is very much not mine but I solved it in minutes?). Is it possible my manager is just not seeing this? Should I more often discuss with my manager the level hand-holding I'm having to do?

# ¿ Feb 25, 2021 00:51

downout: Jul 6, 2009

priznat posted:

1) Push back on the hand holding to prevent your time from being sucked away. If being helpful turns into you are doing their work that�s a problem. People will usually take the path of least resistance and if they know you can help them solve all their problems, that�s who they will go to.

2) Document it: save emails, chat messages, write contemporaneous accounts of requests. Track the time you have spent helping them out. This is a CYA for if they can�t get stuff done and blame you because you weren�t helpful enough. Most likely and hopefully you�d never have to pull this out to show the boss but it is better to have than not have.

I haven't started pushing back because it's not too burdensome (yet). It's more alarming of how no one at this level (or one or two lower) should need help with this.

I have been documenting some, and will start to do that in more detail.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2021 01:12

downout: Jul 6, 2009

PhantomOfTheCopier posted:

Have you tried asking them what process they've followed to try to solve the problem? Don't just answer their question or do it for them; teach them to learn and help themselves.

I would do this in most instances, but not for these questions at this level. It's really bad, this isn't the level to learn the answers to this stuff. These are near 1st year questions some times.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2021 02:50

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Chaotic Flame posted:

Did they pivot careers or something?

Not that I know of, my understanding is they've been doing this for ~7 years.

# ¿ Feb 25, 2021 03:06

downout: Jul 6, 2009

mllaneza posted:

It didn't address the job description at all. Obviously not edited for this position in the slightest way. It was also "second job out of college" short.

I've had interviews in the last round where I outright asked someone to "tell me a troubleshooting story that makes you look good" and didn't get a story. It's baffling how some people expect to survive.

You cant softball it much easier than that.

- "tell me something that makes you look good"
*awkward silence ensues*

# ¿ Mar 4, 2021 20:21

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Banzai 3 posted:

Oh this looks quite nice! Never heard of it before. Absolutely would run afoul of our policies on use of unapproved third-party services though so I’m out of luck.

There are websites that track time. Is toggl a website? If so i dont consider that a 3rd party service. Are you also disallowed from using unapproved search engines?

# ¿ May 11, 2021 18:20

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Banzai 3 posted:

You and I being rational people, I�d agree and argue this isn�t an issue. My firm�s Acceptable Technology Use Policy would not agree. In theory, I could use this if I didn�t enter any client names, but then I need a reconciling list between how I use Toggl and what I�ve worked on, and that�s just more trouble than it�s worth when I have an Excel system that works well enough.

Well just make sure you include that additional time necessary to track that due to their policies. Wouldn't want to do anything outside of compliance.

# ¿ May 12, 2021 05:37

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Not Grover posted:

My company has also been in startup mode for about a decade. They�re a NZ company with offices in the UK and the US - I joined up 3 years ago when they opened an office in the US. I�m a manager in the implementation service line and the US office has about 80% of the implementation service line. About a year and a half ago, they bought a different (much, much smaller - 20ish people) company that we had a relationship with and within a year most had left, so I�m trying to plan for the outcome that has me pivoting to my next role elsewhere.

Related/unrelated bonus story:, I had a project running that was switching from our competitor to us, and when they found out the news they decided to pull the lug on the project because they hate the other company so much. Last minute cancellation like this (literally the Friday before my team was supposed to go on-site for the go live) might cost them about 90% of the project fees based on the contract.

This sounds hilarious, but who pulled the plug and is going to get hit with project fees?

# ¿ Jun 6, 2021 16:38

downout: Jul 6, 2009

theHUNGERian posted:

Literally my first interview after grad school was a two-day process with ~15 1-on-1 interviews at a mega corp. I got my rear end kicked so loving hard.

Holy poo poo, what is the point!? To hire someone at a steeply reduced salary compared to the rest of the devs. Let's waste a year+ of the new hire's salary in dev's revenue time!

# ¿ Jun 15, 2021 01:35

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Motronic posted:

It's CYA all the way to the bottom. If you as the hiring manager gets a consensus of people who've interviewed this person then surely it can't be YOUR fault if they don't work out.

We have a process like this (edit: the CYA part). Or at least it feels like this this. It's elaborate and uses a bunch of senior and staff engineers time. And what do you know, the last hire was the worst dev I've worked with in 10 years. Working as intended since no one wanted to take the step to fire their rear end.

# ¿ Jun 15, 2021 02:54

downout: Jul 6, 2009

PhantomOfTheCopier posted:

Supply chain, electricity, waste management, network engineering, heating and cooling,... Have we forgotten April 2020 when there was no toilet paper because there was plenty but the people were somewhere else? Or how my electric bill doubles or triples in the late summer and that's without the 10hr a day I'm at work benefiting from the more efficient, shared HVAC system? Or all the individual wireless connections and personal internet connections, vpn connections, and additional latencies and performance issues from remote audio/video attempts?

I have exactly the same amount of data (none) to make the claim, but there are considerable efficiency gains having people onsite. It's obviously more net efficiency with viable rapid transit, and poorly upkept cars spewing noxious fumes is not great, but then neither is 500 small delivery trucks dispersing one week of toilet paper to 1000 individuals.

ps Half or more of my team complained nonstop for the first two months because they didn't have twenty food trucks five minutes away and were going hungry.

pps I'm still waiting to hear about the ergonomic/health lawsuits.

Nah

# ¿ Jun 21, 2021 01:39

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Space Gopher posted:

Kaseya is IT remote management software that was hacked and used to mass-spread ransomware. It's created absolute nightmares for a lot of small-to-medium businesses, and the managed service providers that typically do outsourced IT for them.

In the infosec world, that kind of compromise - breaking into some software that's widely trusted, then using that to as a launchpad to break into a bunch of other targets - is called a "supply chain attack."

Wasn't solarwinds just hacked a year ago? Hah our techno-economy is such a house of cards.

# ¿ Jul 5, 2021 19:00

downout: Jul 6, 2009

This seems relevant given the previous thread title (WFH for HR, none for thee or something like that) https://www.businessinsider.com/google-exec-reportedly-working-remote-after-opposing-it-for-staff-2021-7

# ¿ Jul 10, 2021 02:27

downout: Jul 6, 2009

It's ok tho cuz he'll fly in to be in person in the california office often. See his commute is 30 hours and yours is only 2 you filthy whiners.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2021 02:54

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Why pay a medical bill? They'll just come back later and let you pay it off for half before collections?

# ¿ Jul 16, 2021 16:16

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Notification spam is annoying, but email rules are easy.

# ¿ Jul 25, 2021 04:33

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Eric the Mauve posted:

'k' and all variations on thumbs up smileys all translate to "I acknowledge receipt of your email/text but don't necessarily care about it and have probably already forgotten it entirely"

It's just an acknowledgement; I see it as nothing more or less.

Working remote now makes me think that often over-communication is better. In this way I see sending an acknowledgement response as a simple way to help people not feel as if they are just pitching messages into a black hole.

# ¿ Aug 9, 2021 15:06

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Eric the Mauve posted:

All of that is dwarfed by not having a commute and the associated costs of that in both money and time, IMO. Your point has some merit, but all of that is tax deductible as long as you have dedicated workspace in your home, at least.

I thought those tax deductions went away with the trump tax revisions. Am I misunderstanding?

# ¿ Aug 11, 2021 02:25

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Comstar posted:

Despite all my problems with the GLOBAL PANDEMIC, endless lockdowns and a huge increase in work load, I was able to complete the requirement of my PIP! I met the only measurable requirement and was quite happy going into my first follow up meeting.

Do you really need to guess what happened?.

Nothing I did mattered. Nothing matters. They just reiterated my failings. I was shocked to hear that once the lockdowns are over (you know when we say goodbye to COVID-19) we will all be working in the office and getting high productivity at home will not happen. And workload will only increase and get worse. Despite being the only people being expected to be in the office, we are still hot desking,.

Another workmate is quitting tomorrow (he gave 1 weeks notice on Monday).

So, whats the most hilarious or imaginative way to say "I quit"?

If working remote, don't give a notice and just find another job. See how long and how little you can do for them to keep paying you.

edit: but ya this is probably the right answer

Fil5000 posted:

The hilarious ways are the ones you keep in your head and don't actually do, lest you run into any of these people again. You just hand your boss a letter confirming you will leave on X date per the terms of your contract/whenever you like if you're in an at-will state/country.

# ¿ Aug 26, 2021 20:30

downout: Jul 6, 2009

I unofficially learned and did Jira admin for a couple years. A coworker and I agreed that our (small) company jira setup and usage was trash and started over. As part of that I learned all I could about jira configurations and customizations and worked with the other person to setup some workflows and unofficial policies of usage. No one else knew how to use jira or manage it, so that kind of worked.

CarForumPoster posted:

Inflated sense of self importance
Alcoholism
Kissassery up the org chart but relentless sense of infallibility when approached by anyone else

also a solid list

In the end this is what happened by a person who had no idea how to use it, manage it, configure it, nothing. But I was leaving so whatever.

# ¿ Sep 10, 2021 01:57

downout: Jul 6, 2009

So I always thought that the farther you make it up the chain the less work you have to do. People are telling me that is not the way it works. Is there a norm here?

# ¿ Dec 4, 2021 05:39

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Eric the Mauve posted:

An exercise anyone can do that would be humbling but also a little bit freeing for most people who work for A Big Company is "what happens at each level of management if I just ghost out of my job tomorrow and never come back?" For the average IC it's along the lines of

Your boss is somewhere on the spectrum between pissed and frantic.
Your grandboss is annoyed, and takes the time to make sure you're blackballed for life from the company. He'll discuss it with your boss in meetings occasionally until the position is filled.
Your great-grandboss hears about it, asks for an action plan to account for your job duties, skims said action plan for 30 seconds when she gets it, and never thinks about it again. This person probably doesn't know your name.
Your great-great-grandboss has never heard of you and will never hear about your disappearance.

A coworker did this at my previous company. We were working remote, and they just stopped responding. To everything - email, text, facebook, etc. I'm not sure what happened because they had a company laptop which seemed like a serious legal matter. As for the effect on the company, the coworker was the worst employee I've ever worked with, their work was so bad it made more work for us to fix the cock-ups after the fact, and they never should have been hired in the first place. So other than the missing laptop, probably a net positive for the company.

# ¿ Dec 23, 2021 14:39

downout: Jul 6, 2009

sticksy posted:

All of this org chart and reporting hierarchy chat reminds me of a few years ago when Zappo�s tried to go to a �holacracy� - a flat organization without titles or bosses, and it apparently was a disaster.

I knew 2 people there who took the buyout (to their credit, Zappo�s at least realized that this sort of shift wouldn�t work for a lot of people) since they could never figure out who they were supposed to go to for certain problems or to escalate things.

Here�s a write up on it from last year:
https://finance.yahoo.com/news/zappos-quietly-backed-away-holacracy-090102533.html

This part sounds like an excerpt from xguard86�s terrifying dystopian AI/blockchain poem with an added libertarian internal competition breeds a leaner, meaner company twist

Didn't sears' ceo try this and ran the company into the ground?

# ¿ Dec 26, 2021 01:38

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Dik Hz posted:

This is complete and utter bullshit. Don�t demote someone and �casually inform them as though it is banal news.�

If you do someone dirty at least acknowledge it or nobody that reports to you will ever respect your leadership again. And for good reason.

This is very true based on some current experiences. We're just completing ignoring our development methodologies and several best practices right now, and there is zero recognition or even basic acknowledgement it's being done. Ya sorry boss, I've kind of lost all respect for you. All those statements made over the last ~4 months have been exposed as meaningless noise.

# ¿ Feb 4, 2022 00:16

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

Confluence is pretty bad but it's better than many other things. It can of course be abused to do stupid poo poo like "I'm going to upload every single excel file I generate as an attachment" and "here's a list of keywords to gently caress every search anyone will ever do".

I think my "favourite" is "here's a page with a 1000 row table that we expect you all to fill out by tomorrow" leading to the worst game of multiplayer excel you've ever seen.

My biggest complaint so far is an inability to search for special chars.

# ¿ Feb 27, 2022 23:23

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Tomfoolery posted:

https://youtu.be/_AAQT6ifGys

It's dumb, and you'll be dumber for watching it

Those wacky youngsters with their crazy hats! They're laughing cuz they're having fun!

# ¿ Mar 12, 2022 14:51

downout: Jul 6, 2009

PhantomOfTheCopier posted:

You're being a bit vague so it's difficult to assess just how pointless their approach is, but in general you should:

1. Listen.
2. Determine which games you're currently willing to play.
3. Be aware of things you will not do, either for reasons of personal comfort, legal limitations, etcetera.

The only thing you ever "need" to explain is #1. You can keep the remainder to yourself, though it may not be ideal for your career.

You should be aware that management changes, the workforce changes, expectations change, and they will never, ever manage to achieve the ideal even in industries that permit it. Try to find ways to grow that achieve a combination of personal goals and what they're selling.

It's been on my mind a lot lately, having started a new job in January. I spent years learning to talk to people, but now I feel like everyone else is silent and I talk to much, which means I get in trouble because I'm the one speculating, thinking aloud, voicing dissent. Meanwhile I need my new team to trust me so I have to say something.

It's an annoying balancing act, friend, because most people aren't professional, even at work, so you can't hold a discussion without someone getting offended and deciding you are evil incarnate for not agreeing that fuzzy bunnies are the best choice for the March employee gathering and oh aren't you just terrible your mother must have hated you and you must be a dog person and the old secretary was so much nicer we should never have fired her (and who knows what the gently caress any of this has to do with making automobile engines but this is corporate).

# ¿ Mar 13, 2022 06:29

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Barudak posted:

Best evidence that Ohio is an unlivable hell realm is having roomates on 100k is preferable

I was curious, and 100k in ohio is almost 90th percentile.

# ¿ Mar 26, 2022 17:47

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Organization is a useful concept for everyone whether that is physical or virtual, and, I would say, has been for a long time and will continue into the future. Maybe search functions do make it obsolete, but I've not found that to be the case. Organizing my Outlook and file directories makes me able to recall information quickly which in turn makes my working hours less.

Not everyone has to do it, but it's an easy, positive habit to learn.

# ¿ Mar 30, 2022 15:22

downout: Jul 6, 2009

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

Who are these people . We're two years into remote work, surely everyone has figured out to default to mute on every meeting you join until it's time to say something.

I've started doing this even on personal phone calls, it's an improvement there.

10.0% of the people I've worked with through out my career are what I would consider "not a dumbass", so this isn't really surprising. Maybe everyone else works mostly awesome, amazing people, but :lol:

that is not my experience.

# ¿ May 11, 2022 17:37

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Che Delilas posted:

Don't overthink it, just ask. A functional organization shouldn't even blink at the cost of a laptop, but if they do you can always bring up how much of your time and therefore salary is wasted with your current one.

Ya, what are engineering costs for a company? 200/hr? A laptop is like 20 hours, which is pretty easy to justify.

# ¿ May 26, 2022 03:56

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Kudaros posted:

I'm looking for an offramp from the 9-5 and into my own thing. I've been at this job for four years out of university (PhD). I'm a data scientist working remotely for a large, established company while living in a LCOL area. I've paid off my house, my car, most outstanding debts, and my wife no longer has to work her job. We live mostly modestly, aside from recent household expenses.

We are anticipating our first and only child later this year, so expenses will obviously increase. I did a sample budget and we can still comfortably survive on half of my income. She herself can work pretty much as she pleases as little or as much. Her hourly income is about half mine. Taxes on the home are low.

My plan is to stay at least another year. I get 6 weeks of paternity leave 100% paid and gain an extra week's vacation next year. I might be able to get one of my ideas to a point where I know better whether or not they'll work while working this job.

But after that if I need/want more time I'm thinking

1) try to go part-time at this job (one other person my level in my business unit has done that within the last month)
2) quit and take a 3-6 month contract job elsewhere (never done this before)
3) Attempt a part-time job elsewhere (these even exist?)
4) Attempt freelance consulting (I feel like clients will be difficult to find, especially in volatile markets)
5) Work longer and save up for a bit of runway. I don't like this idea because I feel like time is just slipping away from me.

Anyone have any experience with this sort of thing? I was surprised when I heard my colleague was going part-time. It seems so rare.

I'm not sure what your career is but in dev/IT there are definitely remote jobs that only take part time to do. They're ostensibly full-time jobs but can easily be kept up in ~20 - 25 hours a week.

# ¿ May 27, 2022 20:53

downout: Jul 6, 2009

KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:

in an operational environment there are very clear things that everyone should be doing and a bad ops manager who won't do his job or fucks up delegation of work is the WORST

also like, loving lead from the front you dipshit

You should lead from the front by carry some poor sap in front of you, like this

# ¿ Sep 8, 2022 16:48

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Clear_Blue posted:

I'm looking for a good personal task managing program, any suggestions?

Currently I use Trello, I like the kanban layout and option for adding comments to cards. But I work outside of sprint cycles or team projects, so the whole 'shared board' is not necessary for me.

I tried To do, and I like the integration with Outlook; flagging mails as a task, seeing tasks in my Calender. But the layout is godafwul, and there is little room voor expanding/ combining tasks.

I use outlook for all this. Make tasks, write notes, copy greenshot images directly in there, whatever, and set a future time. Also, if people mention things to me in Teams that I don't want to deal with, I turn those into tasks with no timer, I'll get to it whenever. If a timer goes off, I take all of 5 secs to figure out if I give a poo poo and if not aggressively move that timer out - like days or a week. A few times a week when I get the energy I review the task list and actually knock a few things out.

I used to do some of this stuff in Trello, but it was just some other app to go into and didn't really help me. I generally haven't missed any big deal stuff, so it works well enough for me.

# ¿ Sep 21, 2022 22:54

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Jordan7hm posted:

https://archive.ph/2022.09.23-154809/https://www.businessinsider.com/amazon-promotion-raises-compensation-bug-2022-9

Yikes

Sucks to be a manager who needs to have that conversation

Recurring theme apparently https://www.kron4.com/news/national/honda-requests-cash-from-employees-after-overpaid-bonuses/

# ¿ Sep 27, 2022 23:30

downout: Jul 6, 2009

What is the term when you follow dumb rules exactly to the letter? Basically knowing the whole thing is going to face plant because it's stupid? Something compliance?

# ¿ Oct 20, 2022 00:22

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Trabant posted:

Malicious compliance.

My brain kept saying "subversive compliance", and that seemed a little much.

# ¿ Oct 20, 2022 14:48

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Tnuctip posted:

Q, you will have to pick one camp to align with, I’d pick the one more likely to be in power in 3 years. Non sociopath option is you become kickass good at your job and everyone respects you begrudgingly but genuinely. Like yes it’s hard, but I mean being good by being very smart not by working very hard (this is tough but not impossible).

Week of corporate drama for me. VP who I genuinely liked and respected was announced to be retiring but the announcement didn’t come from him (he was told to quit). Board is adding and swapping members. CEO wasn’t asked any questions in the big yearly meeting I wasn’t invited to, and old boss told me that the CEO complained publicly how people leave work at 5. He’s turbo hosed and projecting, not great for anyone.

On a personal note, have an internal promotion chat on Monday. Turned down a job for an industry group that had multiple people name me as a top tier person in my field. And I turned it down because I have a genuine serious pitch for IP to a multinational company that is being actively scheduled now. Will become serious enough to disclose per company rules right around the time promotion would kick in if Monday talks go well

Worst of all as a true corporate guy I have both a steak dinner and golf outing being hosed with because of a soft hiring freeze.

Tough life :buddy:

# ¿ Oct 22, 2022 15:36

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# ¿ May 22, 2024 18:00

downout: Jul 6, 2009

Isn't it worth at least leaving some anonymous reviews as an FYI for others?

"So and so is dishonest and takes illegal actions that create liability for clients and employees."

Seems like a simple statement that can be ignored or taken seriously. Those that take it seriously will dodge a mess. Those that don't might find themselves in a mess and think "geez I guess that is what that review meant".

# ¿ Oct 26, 2022 15:05

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Corp Megathread: A box covered with the dust of years, labeled "EMPLOYEE SUGGESTIONS"

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