Retail Thread: I'M A BALLET DANCER! I HOPE YOU ALL SHIT YOURSELVES TO DEATH!

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Retail Thread: I'M A BALLET DANCER! I HOPE YOU ALL SHIT YOURSELVES TO DEATH!

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Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Dear retail goons, how can I, as a consumer, be less of an rear end in a top hat as a customer? I know not to try to get into the store out of hours, break things, or generally behave like an entitled rear end, but what are the things I can do that will make your experience interacting with people like me less terrible, that I might not know about?

# ¿ Dec 11, 2017 20:08

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# ¿ May 22, 2024 15:32

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Boy, do I have a treat for you!

'tis the season!

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 06:55 on Dec 14, 2017

# ¿ Dec 14, 2017 06:52

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Dear parking lot shopping cart attendants:

I apologize for re-sorting and storing all the carts by size. I know it�s your job and that it�s super awkward when you come across me doing it. I just... I just really hate it when people don�t put their carts into the receiver thing by correct size, I hate how they look, I hate how they spill out into the lane and sometimes people just leave their cart out in the open. I hate it. At root, though, I feel guilty on their behalf for making you re-sort them. I�m sorry 😐 I�ll try to cut back on it.

# ¿ Jan 6, 2018 11:59

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

No one gets mad at me, it's just incredibly awkward.

:sigh:

"Sir, you don't need to do that, we can take care of it."

:v:

"-oh! oh, uh, I know, I just....sorry."

Also there are often carts left in the striped loading/unloading area adjacent to the handicapped parking spots. Is that people being nice and leaving a cart for someone who would struggle to get them, or people being lazy?

Not, uh, that I'm drawing flowcharts for how to more efficiently arrange the lot and cart organization process, or anything. I wouldn't do that.

# ¿ Jan 9, 2018 17:55

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

�God.�

�Sir.�

�Bojangles.�

�buddy.�

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 08:56 on Jan 23, 2018

# ¿ Jan 23, 2018 08:52

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Zenithe posted:

The only reason I can think of not to like the wrappers to that level is they have nutritional information on them which nobody reads (except me and HOLY gently caress they are bad for you).

Depending on how they're classified that's downright illegal.

edit: yeah a quick perusal of FDA regs and it's super unlikely that frozen, packaged muffins sent to your business from another location qualify for an exemption. Are you technically a restaurant?

# ¿ Feb 9, 2018 20:16

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Zenithe posted:

I live in Australia so the FDA doesn't matter, but no, it's a petrol station.

Sorry, I shouldn't have assumed, and my condolences. If I'm reading this slightly out-of-date guidance document correctly, it should still apply, but my god your government writes lousy food reg guidance.

edit: Yeah the relevant standard, which is much easier to parse than the guidance, makes that clear. Sorry, it's not like you should be calling the police or something, it's just annoying for the food law pedant in me. I hope none of them contain nuts!

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 00:39 on Feb 10, 2018

# ¿ Feb 10, 2018 00:35

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Once again I am confused. I can understand being vaguely put out if a place I want to shop at is closed earlier than listed. The idea of ever, ever expecting the employees to reopen the location, or to keep it open past hours, is completely bonkers to me.

# ¿ Feb 12, 2018 22:20

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

The Lord Bude posted:

Dentists have told me that the sweetened iced tea you buy in bottles at the supermarket are super acidic to the point that they are considerably worse for your teeth than drinking coke.

Sugar is the devil far, far more so than fat - and it�s worse for you guys in the US because everything is made with corn syrup which is worse for you than cane sugar.

If you want an energy hit just drink a cup of coffee or (real) tea. There�s nothing wrong with getting a latte made on 2% and skipping the sugar. Most adults don�t eat enough dairy anyway.

parachutes into thread

Corn syrup is not nutritively or chemically different from cane sugar. Studies on these subjects must be parsed closely and with a degree of cynicism, as there's been a proxy research war going on between cane and corn refiners on these subjects for at least 20 years now. Sugar and sweetener research is pretty much the single biggest cesspit in the sciences these days.

Most sugars you consume in your diet are about the same, unless you're getting into the really obscure stuff, like ~~*agave nectar*~~, and then the primary differences are glycemic impact.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2018 07:26

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Starbucks should totally sell their branded water. Imagine the profit margins on Starbucks water...also imagine the infusion of caffiene and sugar that would go into it.

I'll have a Grande Acqua whip with three shots please.

# ¿ Mar 9, 2018 20:48

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

I've always wondered why there wasn't a nozzle/tank interlock seal setup on commercial general use gas dispensers. It wouldn't even have to be very complex, though corrosion could be an issue.

# ¿ May 16, 2018 15:56

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

If the date range of the promotion was on the sign, the customer has notice. That's before we even get to any laws about error or honoring statements.

# ¿ May 25, 2018 16:02

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Best by and expiration dates aren't directly FDA or USDA regulated, so long as they're not dishonest. They're mostly for internal supply chain use. At the same time, customer perception means that depending on the company it'll sometimes be very conservative. Why deal with the customer complaints about off-tasting food when making the date earlier makes it the retail and supply chain people's problem? All the same, though, they're broadly a good rule of thumb for most products, because companies also have an interest in having a later date listed. The details of what goes into the decision are really messy and product and company-dependent.

The exception is infant formula. That's really tightly regulated, for predictable reasons.

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 16:14 on May 26, 2018

# ¿ May 26, 2018 16:11

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

MC Hawking posted:

As a tiny shop I frequently am the recipient of beer that's a week from expiration and the TABC will come down hard on stores that are selling expired product. It drives my salesguys crazy since they're ultimately the ones who know the date codes and all they can do is swap product. I feel ya.

oh poo poo, I should note I have no clue what regs are for alcoholic products, completely outside my area.

# ¿ May 26, 2018 20:23

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Kilonum posted:

Hey, for those of you in Massachusetts (which includes myself and probably at least one other person in this thread), the state legislature failed to act on the minimum wage bill in April, which means it will go to a referendum as part of the general election in November.

For those that don't know, the tl;dr of the bill is:

Minimum wage goes from $11/hr to $12/hr ($3.75 to $5.05 tipped) on January 1st, 2019

Goes to $13/hr ($6.35 tipped) on January 1st, 2020

Goes to $14/hr ($7.64 tipped) on January 1st, 2021

Goes to $15/hr ($9.00 tipped) on January 1st, 2022

Annually starting January 1st, 2023, minimum wage increases are based on the 12-month percentage increase in the Consumer Price Index

Gonna repost this in the restaurant industry thread.

# ¿ May 30, 2018 22:29

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

therobit posted:

Tipped minimum wage is such bullshit. I'm glad that my stake enforces regular minimum wage for all employees.

It's hard to overturn because of the casual tax fraud that tipping structures encourage, among any number of other issues.

# ¿ May 30, 2018 22:46

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

therobit posted:

In Oregon they still get tips anyway. Honest question: How does under-reporting of income keep tipped minimum wage alive?

People think it means tipping will end (partly because some places that implement individual living wage standards do things to discourage tipping). The people who underreport believe that "gravy train" will dry up compared to reported, taxed income. A lot of the culture around tipping revolves around really crappy internalized beliefs about worth and competition that don't bear out. In practice, raising the minimum wage, removing the tip exemption and pegging the rate to an economic indicator equation is one of the real low-hanging fruit in US policy, across the board.

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 01:17 on May 31, 2018

# ¿ May 31, 2018 01:14

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Leal posted:

Its June, I'm in California, its hot. Do they make Dickies in lighter materials? I've got some major swamp crotch going on at work, so far my solution has been to go into the fridge, unzip my pants and just wiggle my lower body to get the heat out of there. Its gonna be awkward when a coworker walks in on me doing that.

Av/post combo strong.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2018 04:43

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

OneTruePecos posted:

Autochat

Elmnt80 posted:

Are either of you female, or have you had female colleagues? I'm wondering if that would effect the nature of customer interactions.

# ¿ Jun 11, 2018 04:26

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

OneTruePecos posted:

The store manager was female, the commercial manager was female, the parts driver before me was female, some of the counter jockeys were female. Nobody cared. If anything the customers were more likely to be a little more polite with the women, but that was it.

Very interesting- now I want to compare where you and Elmnt80 worked. Retail Sociology Mysteries!

# ¿ Jun 11, 2018 20:18

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

mllaneza posted:

Did someone say forklift ?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCGgPuD6qFI

Arguably NWS and NMS.

Hooray, it's Klaus! :neckbeard:

I can't imagine anyone here hasn't enjoyed such a classic.

# ¿ Jun 14, 2018 06:21

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Zenithe posted:

Is having a really strong opinion on white vs raw sugar a thing?

Well, obviously it was to that one guy, but come on buddy.

That's an area I know well. Healthwise, for any "normal" kind of source or form, there's no difference. Taste and texture only. When you get into obscure stuff like Agave "nectar", you have to start worrying about glycemic index.

There are several potential sources for "raw" sugar, but the push for it a couple years back came from finding a use for a byproduct of normal sugar refining processes. So a lot of the "raw" stuff is literally a repurposed industrial byproduct with good marketing. Again, though, in terms of health it makes no difference.

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 17:12 on Jun 17, 2018

# ¿ Jun 17, 2018 16:22

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Crossposting from the comic strips thread.

# ¿ Jun 20, 2018 15:36

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Cowslips Warren posted:

I. What is that.

Someone's new avatar.

Leal posted:

A very luscious fox on a box of cherries. Lovingly created by a local business owner, no doubt as I cannot find anything of that company on google.

https://www.facebook.com/pg/Conrad-Adams-Fruit-LLC-524950870921012/posts/

tag yourself, I'm the watermark on the stolen basket image.

Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 22:07 on Jun 23, 2018

# ¿ Jun 23, 2018 22:00

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

I'm the garter belt disappearing behind the basket handle

edit: the shoes also are cut off, and the horrific eyelash thing is fixed in the final label.

# ¿ Jun 23, 2018 22:16

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Zenithe posted:

Other work-shitposting ideas much appreciated.

Offer them a position.

# ¿ Jun 24, 2018 04:43

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

They have some sort of reselling/stockpiling/coupon fraud scam going.

# ¿ Jul 4, 2018 06:25

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Congratulations on your engagement, NerdyMcNerdNerd!

# ¿ Jul 13, 2018 06:55

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Don't. It'd be a terrible way to go...and you'd need to do a few trentas.

# ¿ Jul 15, 2018 23:55

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Sir/madam, have you heard of bi-

damnit, my joke

# ¿ Jul 22, 2018 17:10

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

NerdyMcNerdNerd posted:

How does that hot garbage work anyways? Is it some bullshit where they send someone who's over 18 to buy the smokes, but then ding you if you don't card them? 'Cause man, our policy is "card anyone that looks under 30", and I'm making judgment calls and gently caress carding everyone.

I don't think it's FDA itself that does it, but the state health department. I could be wrong, but it's state stuff for alcohol at least.

# ¿ Aug 2, 2018 02:26

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Anora posted:

We got in a bunch of big animal heads for halloween, on a lark, I put on the cat head for an hour. It was like night and day how nice people were to a guy in a giant cat head. Plus they couldn't see me glare at them when they hosed up everything.

One little girl was super excited, it was hilarious. She just kept saying "Kitty, I want to see the kitty," when she couldn't see me.

Ask to make them part of the uniform.

# ¿ Aug 30, 2018 17:43

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

To their credit, fatal oopsie-daisy's post-avatar synergy game is strong.

# ¿ Sep 9, 2018 14:41

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

silvergoose posted:

As someone who works at TripAdvisor, stories like this are incredible amusing.

OK you can't just say that and not tell us more

# ¿ Oct 30, 2018 19:42

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

silvergoose posted:

Sure I can, this ain't the "hotel reviewers' hubris megathread".

please tell me that is a thing I desperately need it in my life now

# ¿ Oct 31, 2018 03:27

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Sankis posted:

People are still doing the cinnamon challenge? It's pretty easy to die from something like that.

Yeah don't...do that. Most spices, such as nutmeg, have unsettlingly low tox thresholds, and frequently involve multiple organ failure.

# ¿ Nov 27, 2018 07:15

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Zenithe posted:

I'm not saying that you should eat fistfulls of raw spices, but you'll probably just feel poo poo because you ate 5 dishes worth of cumin or whatever, not because you've poisoned yourself.

https://toxnet.nlm.nih.gov/cgi-bin/sis/search/a?dbs+hsdb:@term+@DOCNO+3516

# ¿ Nov 27, 2018 16:10

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

That article (and journal, generally) are not a good source. Myristicin causes organ damage and its other harmful effects in low doses, negative outcomes associated with it (and other spice overdoses) are massively underreported, and cinnamon also contains coumarin, which is toxic and leads to liver problems at relatively low doses (independent of the inhalation issue). Generally, chowing down on a heaping handful of a naturally occurring spice is a good way to put a massive workload on your liver/kidneys, at a minimum.

Sorry for the derail, y'all, I've wound up encountering these things because nutmeg, cinnamon, and a bunch of other spices are getting marketed as dietary supplement cure-alls these days, and it appears it's probably killing old people in a pattern that results in poor causal tracing. Grandma's heart gave out one night and no one realized that she'd started taking five of the turmeric pills she was keeping in her cabinet each morning. That sort of thing.

# ¿ Nov 27, 2018 21:57

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Yawgmoth posted:

not seeing a downside here

It spares them the embrace of comrade guillotine

also sometimes they give them to small kids

# ¿ Nov 27, 2018 23:11

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# ¿ May 22, 2024 15:32

Discendo Vox: Mar 21, 2013; We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

Yawgmoth posted:

If I show up to subway and they have already made my sandwich when I get in, that's a sign of something isn't it.

People tend to remember the quadruple footlong meatball and black forest sub, hold the bun guy.

# ¿ Jan 7, 2019 20:05

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Retail Thread: I'M A BALLET DANCER! I HOPE YOU ALL SHIT YOURSELVES TO DEATH!

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