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haitfais
Aug 7, 2005

I am offended by your ham, sir.
In late March of 2007, forums poster liquorhead created the Geeky Star Wars Questions Megathread, to ask a few simple questions about a popular film trilogy you may have heard of. To no one's surprise, the thread quickly spiralled out of control. Three years and two threads later, four hundred pages of posts by dozens of hopeless nerds have made this the ultimate repository of everything you were never going to ask about Star Wars.

The first thread, link courtesy of Arioch: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2393061 (Archives)

The second thread is here: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3195772&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1

What else do goons have to say about Star Wars?
I'm glad you asked! Here is a selection of other threads about Star Wars.

Courtesy of the mighty WampaLord, Let's Play of Knights of the Old Republic

Thrawn527 Studied the art of our world, and came up with a most effective tactic to destroy our love for the EU: Let Us Read Terrible Star Wars Books For You

This thread will continue where its predecessors began, answering a few pages of fresh new questions before spending the next two hundred or so talking about how much we hate George Lucas, Karen Traviss, and Starkiller.

Before asking your questions, take some time to read this post, which contains the answers to most of the questions and arguments that inevitably come up every five pages. For any questions not covered by the OP, an entire legion of hopeless nerds waits for a chance to prove that we haven't wasted our lives.

Before we discuss anything else, a note on the purpose of this thread. In the last ten years, it's become really easy to complain about Star Wars. Frankly, a lot of things have been added to the canon which many people here do not like. Every thread so far has eventually devolved into pages and pages of bitching, about George Lucas, about the EU, about the Prequels, about Starkiller. Clearly, there's lots to complain about.

Spending ten pages on a discussion of how much Star Wars sucks is the exact opposite of what this thread should be. Yes, there are reasons to complain, and there's no way this thread or any thread after it will be complaint free. But if complaining is all we can do, then there's no reason for this thread to exist at all.

Important events after the movies:
-The Rebel Alliance takes control of the galaxy and is rebranded as the New Republic
-Han and Leia get married and pop out three kids
-Thrawn, the last awesome bad guy in Star Wars, very nearly wins the galaxy back for the Empire around the time Leia’s first kids are born. Luke meets a kickass redhead, Mara Jade, who wants to kill him
-Luke eventually reforms the Jedi Order, establishing an academy on Yavin 4. All three of the Solo kids eventually join
-Luke marries the kickass redhead who wanted to kill him. Luke is a stone Jedi pimp.
-The Yuuzhan Vong, a creepy race from another galaxy, invade the galaxy and almost kick everyone’s asses because of a plot device that makes them “invisible” in the Force or something. In the process, they kill Chewbacca by dropping a moon on him. Defeated by Jedi Ex Machina. Anakin Solo dies.
-Some stupid poo poo happens involving space bug hives and the Chiss
-The New Republic signs a treaty with the Imperial Remnant, forming the Galactic Alliance
-Corellia decides to rebel against the Galactic Alliance, sparking the Second Galactic Civil War
-Jacen Solo is seduced to the Dark Side by “Darth” Lumiya, becoming Darth Caedus, takes over the Galactic Alliance. Caedus kills Mara Jade, Luke kills Lumiya, and Jaina Solo kills Jacen.
-Admiral Daala, one of the more prominent villains of the EU, becomes the head of state of the Galactic Alliance. Charges Luke with dereliction of duty for “allowing” Jacen to fall. Luke is exiled.
-Luke and his son Ben go on a quest to figure out why Jacen fell. At the same time, Jedi start randomly going insane. Daala, being the wonderful person she is, decides to freeze the crazed Jedi in carbonite. Han and Leia go looking for answers.

Timeline note: The current batch of EU novels takes place in the year 43 ABY, that is, after the Battle of Yavin in Star Wars: A New Hope. The plucky heroes you remember from the original movies are in their sixties, and still starring in these books for some reason.

Books in the EU: We tend to get a lot of questions from people new to the Expanded Universe who want to know what books they should read. Everyone has their own opinions about what’s good and what isn’t. About the only thing we can all agree on is that everyone should read the Thrawn Trilogy first. However, there are certain series that are particularly important to the EU, because of the events that occur within. Compiled here is a brief list of important series:
-X-Wing
-Thrawn Trilogy
-Jedi Academy Trilogy
-Hand of Thrawn
-New Jedi Order
-Dark Nest
-Legacy of the Force
-Fate of the Jedi (in progress)
PLEASE NOTE: The series in this list are important to the continuity of the EU. That does not mean that all, or even any of the books in a particular series are any good. The New Jedi Order series spans 27 books, written by numerous authors including the best and the worst Star Wars has to offer.

Apart from paying attention to the series’ above, it’s generally best to just look for books by the better authors. There are many authors writing for Star Wars, and not all of them are good. In fact, some of them are abysmally bad. There are a few diamonds in the rough though. The Goons’ list of good Star Wars authors is as follows:

Timothy Zahn – Responsible for the Thrawn trilogy (Heir to the Empire, Dark Force Rising, The Last Command), which is widely considered to be the gold standard of EU novels. Also responsible for the Hand of Thrawn duology and four standalone novels. Introduced a number of important characters to the EU, notably the Solo twins (as embryos/newborns), and Mara Jade. Very much a fan favorite.

Matthew Stover – Responsible for a handful of standalone novels, including the novelisation of Revenge of the Sith. Which was arguably better than the movie.

Michael A Stackpole – Wrote the Rogue Squadron books, which are generally considered to be fan favorites. Has eight EU novels to his name, most of which revolve around X-Wing pilots.

Drew Karpyshin – Novel writing credits include the Darth Bane novels. Also senior writer for the much loved video game, Knights of the Old Republic

Aaron Allston – Responsible for four books under the “X-Wing” header. One of three writers responsible for the Legacy of the Force series. The only good writer involved in the Legacy of the Force series.

Karen Traviss – For the Republic Commando books prior to Order 66 and NOTHING ELSE.

Michael Reaves - Responsible for the Coruscant Nights series, which gets some love around here.

As mentioned above, the EU has more than a few less than stellar authors among its contributors. Many are just mediocre to poor, but there are a few that are terrible enough to be worthy of special mention:

Kevin J. Anderson – Author of every Star Wars story in which the plot revolves around yet another superweapon.

Troy Denning – Responsible for the travesty known as Dark Nest. One third of the collective responsible for the mess known as Legacy of the Force.

Karen Traviss – For anything other than the Republic Commando books prior to Order 66. Also, for her irrational hatred of Jedi and willingness to alter continuity and horribly mangle established characters to prove her ill-conceived notion that the Jedi are jackbooted fascists. Hilariously insane. Bonus happy ending: no longer writes Star Wars books. See below for hilarious explanation.

:siren:WARNING:siren:
There is a creature on the internet. It calls itself "SuperShadow". It has a website, which I will not post here. It spends its time posting various pieces of "insider information" about Star Wars projects, be they upcoming, in-production, or completely mythical. This includes claiming to have scripts for Episodes 7, 8 and 9.

As should be obvious from the previous sentence, SuperShadow, also known as Mickey Suttle, is completely full of poo poo. Some people believe he is one of the most epic trolls on the internet. Some people believe that he is touched in the brain. It is more likely that he is just a socially warped fuckstain who gets off on posting bullshit and calling it fact, and claiming to be close, personal friends with George Lucas.

Do not believe anything attributed to him. Do not take a single word posted on his website as anything other than complete fabrication. In fact, just don't visit his site. Ever. That's why I'm not posting a link, I don't want to encourage it. We don't want to give him the traffic. He's just a twisted little attention whore with no grounding in reality, and needs to be forgotten so he can simply disappear from the internet.

FAQ
In the old threads, we had a number of questions and debates come up more than once, often many times. For those of us who followed the threads for three years, seeing the same questions or stupid arguments repeated every few pages became something of an aggravation. In an attempt to mitigate that occurring in this thead (even though it will anyway), I will provide the answers to those questions. This includes situations wherein it was not a question, but an argument, because for every argument we’ve had, the conclusion has been the same all hundred and seventeen times we’ve argued it.

With so many books, movies, games and cartoons, there are a lot of contradictions. How do I know what to consider canon?
Some would argue that, because it’s all fiction, you can consider whatever you like to be canon, and ignore as much of the terrible, terrible poo poo that’s been done with this universe as you see fit. For those who want a little more order in their Star Wars experience, Lucasarts has provided a handy guideline. The following levels of canon go from highest to lowest:

- G-Canon: George Lucas Canon. The six movies, novelisations of the six movies (unless they contradict the movies), and anything that George Lucas happened to say while drunk on expensive hooch.
- T-Canon: Television Canon. This pretty much just consists of the CGI Clone Wars series, including the movie that started it. Will also include the live action series that’s supposedly in the works.
- C-Canon: Continuity Canon. Anything made relatively recently that doesn’t fit into G or T Canon. Includes books, games, comics and non-theatrical films. C-Canon stuff sometimes gets put into movies, making it G-Canon (Example: Coruscant)
- S-Canon: Secondary Canon. Anything considered too “old” to be C-Canon. Consists mainly of materials produced in the early days of Star Wars books and comics, before a concerted effort was made to maintain continuity. Can be used or ignored as current and future creators see fit.
- N-Canon. Not Canon. What-if stories like the Infinities comics, as well as deleted scenes from movies and projects that were abandoned in development

Why all the Karen Traviss hate? The Republic Commando books are pretty good. Maybe she has a point about the Jedi, I’ve seen them act like space-fascists in the books a few times.
First of all, look at the covers to those books in which you saw the Jedi acting like that. Chances are you’ll see Karen Traviss’ name. The selfish, fanatical and borderline evil behavior of which Traviss accused the Jedi occurred only in books she wrote. She deliberately wrote established characters in ways that contradicted their prior appearances, up to and including Luke Skywalker, in order to “prove” her point. In her novelisation of The Clone Wars she wrote at least one scene in such a manner that it didn’t even resemble the scene in the movie on which it was based.

Not only is she willing to directly contradict established canon to make the Star Wars universe into what she thinks it is, she has openly stated that she has never read, and will never read any Star Wars novels. At all. She skims plot synopses if it’s necessary for something she’s writing. She doesn’t even pretend to care about established continuity, and throws a psychotic hissy fit if you call her out on it. Anyone who questioned her on the Star Wars forums were banned. She mused in a blog about tearing out the throats of those who criticised her. All of this, of course, has since been deleted, but several people, including veterans of the old threads (not me, unfortunately), have some of the choicest bits saved.

Fortunately, Lucasarts very recently called her out on some of her latest continuity-twisting. Apparently Traviss finds the notion of colouring inside the lines distasteful, because she has declared that she will no longer be writing Star Wars novels. Imperial Commando 2 was to be her last, until she decided to quit without writing it, which she announced on her blog before informing LucasArts. Karen Traviss is classy.

How long was Luke on Dagobah? It seems like he learned how to be a Jedi in a week or so.
It certainly does seem that way, and the pacing of The Empire Strikes Back has led pretty much everyone here to confusion on that topic at some point in our lives. In reality, Luke was on Dagobah for three or four months, which is the amount of time Han, Leia and Chewie spent running, hiding, and being prisoners on Bespin.

Is there really a Light and Dark Side to the Force? How can an energy field made by all living things be so black and white?
There are multiple theories within the Star Wars universe regarding the nature of the Force. There are, in fact, those who believe that the Force is neither light nor dark, it just is, and the people who use it colour it with their intentions. There are many of us out here in the real world who think that explanation makes sense. Unfortunately, Lucasarts has stated outright that the Force has a Light and Dark Side. It really is so black and white, because George Lucas said so.

How could Han make the Kessel run in “under 12 parsecs”? A parsec is a unit of distance, not time.
Kessel is situated extremely close to the Maw, an extremely dangerous cluster of black holes. The Kessel run is usually an 18 parsec trip, with extra distance taken to avoid the black holes. Han’s boast of making the run in 12 parsecs referred to the Falcon’s ability to fly closer to the cluster without being destroyed, thus taking a more direct route. It is assumed that Han attributed this feat to his ship’s speed, or at least the power of his engines.

How much time passed between the movies?
In chronological order:
-Attack of the Clones takes place approximately 10 years after The Phantom Menace
-Revenge of the Sith takes place approximately 3 years after Attack of the Clones
-A New Hope takes place 19 years after Revenge of the Sith
-The Empire Strikes Back takes place approximately 3 years after A New Hope
-Return of the Jedi takes place approximately 1 year after The Empire Strikes Back

What makes you so sure the Empire was evil? It looks to me like they were a legitimate government bringing order to a dangerous galaxy. The rebels were clearly just a bunch of terrorists and religious fanatics trying to take the galaxy from its rightful rulers :smug:
This doesn't come up much around here anymore. Really, only one Imperial sympathiser posts regularly (don't ever change, Mad Hamish). Still, the question gets asked, so here are some things the Empire and its founder did:

-Engineered a fake war in order to maneuver into power, costing billions of lives that never needed to be lost
-Murdered an entire order of peace-loving superheroes who just wanted the galaxy to be a nice place
-Blew up a populated planet that was known for its nonviolent, progressive society of nice people
-Considered non-human species to be second class citizens at best, farm animals at worse. This includes the enslavement of entire races, such as the Wookiees
-Blew up a planet
-Carried on a twenty-five year campaign of propaganda and misinformation designed to keep its populace ignorant of anything that was not in the Empire’s best interests
-Maintained a policy of rule by fear, as espoused by Grand Moff Tarkin, one of the highest ranking officers of the Empire until his death.
-Blew up a loving planet

Even if that list were much shorter, the movies depicted the Empire as cartoonishly evil. Given that the movies are the highest form of canon, if they depict the Empire as evil, then the Empire is evil. Anyone who pursues this argument is destined for disappointment.

How can you say the Jedi just wanted the galaxy to be a nice place? They were a bunch of goose-stepping, baby-stealing religious nutjobs who would wave a lightsaber in the face of anyone who disagreed them and gladly led a SLAVE ARMY to their deaths in a pointless war!
See above, re: Karen Traviss.

If lightsabers were so effective at blocking blaster bolts, why didn’t people start using slugthrowers, or multi-shot blasters, which couldn’t be so easily blocked?
Simple answer: Who expects to end up fighting a Jedi? Not so simple answer: Even if the Jedi can’t block a slug, or multiple blaster bolts at once or a flamethrower, they still have the prescience and the reflexes needed to get the gently caress out of the way. Blocking isn’t their only option.

In the movies, I can think of four distinct parties that successfully killed Jedi: Sith, droids, Jango Fett and clones. The Sith killed the Jedi with lightsabers, so that’s moot. Several Jedi fell to the droids on Geonosis in Episode 2, and the droids were using blasters. Same goes for the clones in Episode 3. Now, in both cases, the aggressors had the advantage of numbers, and the clones had the advantage of shooting the Jedi in the back. Jango Fett, on the other hand, killed a Jedi Master single-handedly, using blaster pistols.

Conclusion: If you’re good enough to kill a Jedi in single combat, then you can probably do it with a blaster.

Of course, HK-47 recommends using poisons and explosives, and he probably has a point. But that brings us back to the simple answer: Who expects to fight a Jedi?

What's the deal with stormtroopers? The clones were completely badass in in the prequels. How come they can't hit the broad side of a sandcrawler just twenty years later? And why does their armor suck?
First and foremost: the stormtroopers in the original trilogy are not clones. The clones had a shortened lifespan, making them all very dead by the time of Ep4. Stormtroopers are conscripts, recruited and trained from subject worlds.

As for their effectiveness, in most situations where we've seen stormtroopers fighting, they've been up against main characters, all of whom were wearing Plot Armor. This has been explained away in a couple of ways. In Ep4, the stormtroopers were likely ordered not to actually shoot the escaping rebels, just make them think they had escaped and not been released, so they could be tracked. Stormtrooper armor is entirely effective against conventional blasters. Unfortunately, escalation happens in a galaxy far, far away just as it does on Earth. Anyone expecting to be fighting stormtroopers packs a heavy blaster, designed to be deadly even in the face of body armor.

As for Endor, that battle suffers the problem of their enemies looking like teddy bears. The Ewoks had the home turf advantage, and were basically fighting a guerilla war. Even so, due to the Ewoks' inferior technology, the Imperials were winning until Chewie got into an AT-ST and blindsided them.

Where do you find all of this information?
The combined brainpower of numerous dorks pondering and answering these questions for more than two years. Also, Wookiepedia: http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Main_Page

If the children of Jedi are likely to be highly Force sensitive, why are Jedi celibate? Shouldn't they be encouraged to marry and breed to strengthen the Order in future generations?
Marriage is not necessarily required for breeding. To wit:

Trans-Angeles posted:

Hit it, and quit it. - Jedi Code

As before let me know if you think something should be added to the OP. It is still a lot of information to keep track of, and I still have ADD.

UPDATE

Superstar poster Jervas Dudley has kindly fulfilled the request for a complete list of the many generations of starwars.jpg:

1992:


The Lost City of the Jedi

1993:


Queen of the Empire

1995:


Darksaber



Assault at Selonia

1996:


Shadows of the Empire

2002



Enemy Lines II: Rebel Stand



The Envoy from Star Wars: Jedi vs. Sith

2010:


The Force Unleashed 2

haitfais fucked around with this message at 21:10 on Jan 16, 2011

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WampaLord
Jan 14, 2010

:neckbeard: Yay! New thread!

Maybe add something in there about prequel hate and more about who was responsible for the best parts of the original trilogy (hint, mostly everyone besides Jorge).

Cross-Section
Mar 18, 2009

For those who missed it in the last thread, here's the Return of the Jedi deleted scene shown at Celebration 5:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdJ0E7HbTKc

deadhoarse
Oct 18, 2004

WampaLord posted:

:neckbeard: Yay! New thread!

Maybe add something in there about prequel hate and more about who was responsible for the best parts of the original trilogy (hint, mostly everyone besides Jorge).

Ack, my celebration post got buried in the last thread... I'd come out to Grotto's tonight, but we're doing the last tour to Endor tonight (for those that don't know, they're retiring Star Tours and replacing it with a more PT-ey version.

WampaLord
Jan 14, 2010

deadhoarse posted:

Ack, my celebration post got buried in the last thread... I'd come out to Grotto's tonight, but we're doing the last tour to Endor tonight (for those that don't know, they're retiring Star Tours and replacing it with a more PT-ey version.

Yes, so sad to see it go. I need that "Thrawn shedding a tear over the Imperial flag" emote someone cooked up in the last thread.

Spiderjelly
Aug 22, 2006

Sign of evil.
What is the behind the scenes story on Yoda's grammar? I've heard that Lucas wanted it to resemble Latin, which it does. Was this his objective or did he have something else in mind?

Oh, and just a heads up to Star Wars fans in and around Kalamazoo Michigan: the valley museum has a traveling exhibit that contains, among other awesome things, Darth Vader's cloak and robe, Luke Skywalker's flight suit, and Obiwan's robe, all originals. Free admission.

sniper4625
Sep 26, 2009

Loyal to the hEnd
I dunno if you wanted to add a link to the Let's Read Bad Star Wars Books Thread, at least it would save Thrawn the trouble of posting it every so often:

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3296954

deadhoarse
Oct 18, 2004

WampaLord posted:

prequel

Clone Wars teaser shown too. Darth Maul has a brother. Looks just like him.

Big Mean Jerk
Jan 27, 2009

Well, of course I know him.
He's me.

deadhoarse posted:

Clone Wars teaser shown too. Darth Maul has a brother. Looks just like him.

:ughh:

elf pr0n
Oct 13, 2002

They fucking better have lemon cakes.
So if I was getting back into the entire Star Wars EU/Jedi Academy/whatever else what books should I read? The only Star Wars book I read was Shadows of the Empire (lol) and I really want to read me some Star Wars books!

Cross-Section
Mar 18, 2009

WampaLord posted:

Yes, so sad to see it go. I need that "Thrawn shedding a tear over the Imperial flag" emote someone cooked up in the last thread.

There's a new "commercial" out for Star Tours II; now, I'm not too worried about the prequelization of the ride, considering the three planets highlighted are Bespin, Endor, and Alderaan.

WampaLord
Jan 14, 2010

elf pr0n posted:

So if I was getting back into the entire Star Wars EU/Jedi Academy/whatever else what books should I read? The only Star Wars book I read was Shadows of the Empire (lol) and I really want to read me some Star Wars books!

First of all, I liked Shadows of the Empire! :colbert:

Secondly, anything by Timothy Zahn (I so want his autograph at Dragon*Con), but start with the Heir to the Empire trilogy (Heir to the Empire, Dark Force Rising, The Last Command).

The "Tales from..." books are pretty entertaining looks into secondary/minor characters. I enjoyed them all, but particularly Tales from Jabba's Palace.

I'm sure others have good recommendations, but I'll just throw in the Revenge of the Sith novelization as well.

sniper4625
Sep 26, 2009

Loyal to the hEnd

elf pr0n posted:

So if I was getting back into the entire Star Wars EU/Jedi Academy/whatever else what books should I read? The only Star Wars book I read was Shadows of the Empire (lol) and I really want to read me some Star Wars books!

Anything by Zahn.
X-Wing series from Stackpole and Allston.

Those should be a good start.

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here
Nap Ghost

Cross-Section posted:

For those who missed it in the last thread, here's the Return of the Jedi deleted scene shown at Celebration 5:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdJ0E7HbTKc

That seems like a pretty cool scene to have been deleted

omgLerkHat!
Dec 7, 2003

Supreme Allah posted:

That seems like a pretty cool scene to have been deleted

It was probably deleted because it was more meaningful to have the full 'reveal' of the new lightsaber's significance (and it's similarity to Obi-wan's) be done by Vader when Luke gets turned over to him. Doing a reveal of something twice is less effective.

Echo Chamber
Oct 16, 2008

best username/post combo
Alright, I'm going to mark this thread and attempt to follow it, even though the last one moved pretty quickly.

One question... why didn't the O.P. mention anything from Dark Horse's soon-to-be-gone for good "Star Wars: Legacy"? I personally found the poo poo Cade Skywalker was doing to be much more interesting than anything else the E.U. had going on. And I'm pretty annoyed that #50's the only issue left to be released, when the series just established an interested status quo, and could have easily went on to issue #100 without getting boring. I'm inclined to believe someone in Lucasarts' higher-ups didn't like that Dark Horse was writing the fate of the Star Wars galaxy, considering it isn't being cancelled for poor sales or bad reviews.

Big Mean Jerk
Jan 27, 2009

Well, of course I know him.
He's me.

Echo Chamber posted:

Alright, I'm going to mark this thread and attempt to follow it, even though the last one moved pretty quickly.

One question... why didn't the O.P. mention anything from Dark Horse's soon-to-be-gone for good "Star Wars: Legacy"? I personally found the poo poo Cade Skywalker was doing to be much more interesting than anything else the E.U. had going on. And I'm pretty annoyed that #50's the only issue left to be released, when the series just established an interested status quo, and could have easily went on to issue #100 without getting boring. I'm inclined to believe someone in Lucasarts' higher-ups didn't like that Dark Horse was writing the fate of the Star Wars galaxy, considering it isn't being cancelled for poor sales or bad reviews.
Actually, it's not ending. It will be continued in a new series titled Star Wars Legacy: War. It's only 6 issues for now but Ostrander has said that if interest and sales are high enough, Dark Horse might consider it for a full series.

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Star_Wars:_Legacy%E2%80%94War

Azzmo
Jul 2, 2007
STUPID MINORITIES ALWAYS MAKING ME FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE TO BE A WHITE MALE

Echo Chamber posted:

Alright, I'm going to mark this thread and attempt to follow it, even though the last one moved pretty quickly.

One question... why didn't the O.P. mention anything from Dark Horse's soon-to-be-gone for good "Star Wars: Legacy"? I personally found the poo poo Cade Skywalker was doing to be much more interesting than anything else the E.U. had going on. And I'm pretty annoyed that #50's the only issue left to be released, when the series just established an interested status quo, and could have easily went on to issue #100 without getting boring. I'm inclined to believe someone in Lucasarts' higher-ups didn't like that Dark Horse was writing the fate of the Star Wars galaxy, considering it isn't being cancelled for poor sales or bad reviews.

Perhaps part of the problem that Legacy wasn't going anywhere? I was pretty into it for the first 30ish issues and then it started to feel repetitive and it lost a lot of its luster. That probably reduced sales a bit.

Do you think it would be worth me reading the final 20? I almost don't want to get interested again only to run into a premature final issue.

edit: nevermind. Question answered above.

twice burned ice
Dec 29, 2008

My stove defies the laws of physics!
Star Wars. Lol.

Edit: Star Wars is the fodder of a relatively insane man whose crazy ideas became the obsession of millions of poopsocking nerds despite the fact that it is some ridiculous loving poo poo.

Edit2(For content): What is it that interests you lot? I mean, sure, Leia was hot back before internet porn was widely available, but what's the excuse now?

twice burned ice fucked around with this message at 01:35 on Aug 16, 2010

Mister_Eel
Jun 29, 2007

deadhoarse posted:

Clone Wars teaser shown too. Darth Maul has a brother. Looks just like him.

Please, for the love of God, tell me you are joking.

I'm barely hanging in here as a Star Wars fan.

Echo Chamber
Oct 16, 2008

best username/post combo

Big Mean Jerk posted:

Actually, it's not ending. It will be continued in a new series titled Star Wars Legacy: War. It's only 6 issues for now but Ostrander has said that if interest and sales are high enough, Dark Horse might consider it for a full series.

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Star_Wars:_Legacy%E2%80%94War

Oh sweet, never mind then. Actually, I was sort of annoyed at Krayt's return at the end of Legacy 49. I assumed reintroducing him as a threat was just a cheap way of giving the final issue an awesome climax. But if they have plans for the character... fine. This sort of undoes the whole point of the ill-conceived Vector storyline. But whatever.

There was some speculation that the "cancellation" was just a matter of keeping trade sales from dropping after the 10th volume with rebranding. I guess I'm glad it's sort of true.

Big Mean Jerk
Jan 27, 2009

Well, of course I know him.
He's me.

Echo Chamber posted:

This sort of undoes the whole point of the ill-conceived Vector storyline. But whatever.
Vector was terrible and every series suffered because of it. Why wouldn't you want to undo it?

i am tim!
Jan 5, 2005

God damn it, where are my ant keys?! I'm gonna miss my flight!

deadhoarse posted:

Clone Wars teaser shown too. Darth Maul has a brother. Looks just like him.

And here I was thinking they couldn't top The Darksaber.

Nckdictator
Sep 8, 2006
Just..someone

elf pr0n posted:

So if I was getting back into the entire Star Wars EU/Jedi Academy/whatever else what books should I read? The only Star Wars book I read was Shadows of the Empire (lol) and I really want to read me some Star Wars books!

Yoda: Dark Rendezvous was pretty good even if it's a prequel novel.

I was skeptical about a Yoda novel but it's done pretty well honestly. It makes Dooku pretty sympathetic.

cthulusnewzulubbq
Jan 26, 2009

I saw something
NASTY
in the woodshed.
Was there any sort of leap in technology that gave birth to the deathstar? It would seem that orbital mortars would be desirable to just about anyone in the galaxy and the only reason I can come up with as to why the Empire did it first was because it was such a massive money sink. That, and because it's cartoonishly evil.

Be gentle with me, I don't read that EU stuff.

Fellblade
Apr 28, 2009

deadhoarse posted:

Clone Wars teaser shown too. Darth Maul has a brother. Looks just like him.

Don't worry, it's Starkiller's Uncle in disguise.

forsakenfuture
Apr 13, 2010

Doesnt Lucas have to sign off on everything in the EU?

sniper4625
Sep 26, 2009

Loyal to the hEnd

cthulusnewzulubbq posted:

Was there any sort of leap in technology that gave birth to the deathstar? It would seem that orbital mortars would be desirable to just about anyone in the galaxy and the only reason I can come up with as to why the Empire did it first was because it was such a massive money sink. That, and because it's cartoonishly evil.

Be gentle with me, I don't read that EU stuff.

Tarkin posted:

Fear will keep the local systems in line. Fear of this battle station

Sure, a bunch of relatively smaller warships may make more sense logically, militarily and financially, but the whole point of the Empire's philosophy at the time wasn't to simply destroy planets, but to make them too afraid of being obliterated to act out.

Except for Alderaan, I guess, but they obviously had it coming.

Tumblr of scotch
Mar 13, 2006

Please, don't be my neighbor.
Another good book series that should be put in the OP is Coruscant Nights. Four books (only three published so far) with, for the most part, minimal appearances by the major canon characters, and even fewer by random background characters from the movies. Essentially film noir, as a book.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
Awesome, a new thread to complain about Starkiller in!

Spiderjelly
Aug 22, 2006

Sign of evil.
What's the deal with Starkiller?

tolerabletariff
Jul 3, 2009

Do you think I'm spooky?

Chaos Hippy posted:

:siren:WARNING:siren:
"SuperShadow"

I don't know much about Star Wars, but every time this thread comes up, there's the SuperShadow warning. So naturally, I Googled it. I won't post a link but it's the first one that comes up.

Holy poo poo. The first words on the page are, "The legendary, stunning and brilliant SuperShadow.com..." It is literally the most visually unappealing clusterfuck of a site on the Internet and I'm actually rather glad I found it. I believe it is a paragon of poor web design, although rather hilarious in its ludicrousness.

Clearly designed to maximize search engine hits, I find it hard to believe that anyone can possibly believe anything written on there. Seriously, what the gently caress is he thinking?

Big Mean Jerk
Jan 27, 2009

Well, of course I know him.
He's me.

Spiderjelly posted:

What's the deal with Starkiller?

Goons taking over the top gameplay as a slap in the face of the OT. :iiam:

SeanBeansShako
Nov 20, 2009

Now the Drums beat up again,
For all true Soldier Gentlemen.
You have to admire SuperShadow in a way, trolling people on TFN must be incredibly fun.

sniper4625
Sep 26, 2009

Loyal to the hEnd

Spiderjelly posted:

What's the deal with Starkiller?

We get him instead of new Kyle Katarn games. :colbert:

Nucleic Acids
Apr 10, 2007

modestduty posted:

I don't know much about Star Wars, but every time this thread comes up, there's the SuperShadow warning. So naturally, I Googled it. I won't post a link but it's the first one that comes up.

Holy poo poo. The first words on the page are, "The legendary, stunning and brilliant SuperShadow.com..." It is literally the most visually unappealing clusterfuck of a site on the Internet and I'm actually rather glad I found it. I believe it is a paragon of poor web design, although rather hilarious in its ludicrousness.

Clearly designed to maximize search engine hits, I find it hard to believe that anyone can possibly believe anything written on there. Seriously, what the gently caress is he thinking?

Wait, he's still going at it?

SeanBeansShako
Nov 20, 2009

Now the Drums beat up again,
For all true Soldier Gentlemen.
Starkiller is a lying wanker, we all know Tag and Bink chilled with Yoda first.

communism bitch
Apr 24, 2009

Spiderjelly posted:

What's the deal with Starkiller?
Imagine if a Dragonball Z character was injected into Star Wars.

Jenova Project
Aug 5, 2007

by Fistgrrl

Oberleutnant posted:

Imagine if a Dragonball Z character was injected into Star Wars.

He would be shot whilst powering up.

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feedmyleg
Dec 25, 2004
Is there any other information on the Blu-Ray release? Mostly I'm curious about the "never before seen" stuff. Does that mean we're actually going to get a handful of new deleted scenes, or is the new lightsabre scene all we get? I would cut off my own son's hand to get a good, clear look at the Wampa attack on the rebel base, a good copy of the Biggs ANH scenes, the sandstorm sequence, etc. I used to be a big deleted scenes junkie so anything new is amazing.

I haven't gotten excited about anything Star Wars related in ages but any new scenes are bound to get me pumped. The best thing about this scene is that we have the storyboard for it and a matte painting, but it was still a rumor as to whether it was shot at all. I, for one, was convinced that they hadn't.

feedmyleg fucked around with this message at 23:42 on Aug 14, 2010

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