Geeky Star Wars Loser Thread Episode VII: Attack of the bugnest orgies

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The Book Barn > Geeky Star Wars Loser Thread Episode VII: Attack of the bugnest orgies

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tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Slantedfloors posted:

Bossk is played by Kevin James.

The hook is he gets one or both his arms pulled out of their sockets by the Wookiee slaves he delivers every week. Also, it's funny because he's fat.

# ¿ Aug 16, 2010 20:04

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# ¿ May 6, 2024 16:45

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Holy Sithspawn! I thought Teh Roxxor was bad.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2010 18:26

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

NGL posted:

No, this is how you make a Star Wars name:

1. Take your character attribute and/or role in the story.
2. Spell it all alienny. (optional)
3. Add an o.

So, since I'm a tubby asshole who's currently obsessed with Doctor Who, my name would be something like Doc Tubbo. Or I could get creative and go be Whodoc Sholebby.

Going with this, I came up with Pimp Ladykiller.

...But we already have a Lando Calrissian in this universe.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2010 20:00

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Slantedfloors posted:

Yeah, I'm sorry. This looks absolutely awesome.

Except for maybe the fatty fatty fat Sith at the beginning.

It can't help that his sleeves/pauldrons prevent him from leaving the kitchen.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2010 22:37

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Slantedfloors posted:

Being trapped in the kitchen for excessive amounts of time has left him a master of the Lightfork.

Christ! Not too loud! Lucasarts/Bioware might be looking for ideas on unique drops.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2010 22:50

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Mister_Eel posted:

Dude. It's crap like this that made Star Wars stupid.

Agreed. We get shitheaps like this when they try to include martial arts in the SW universe: Ter�s K�si

# ¿ Aug 18, 2010 00:38

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Dave Syndrome posted:

I'm reading it at the moment, and while it's pretty good, some of the Sith names are just ridiculous. "Darth Krayt" I can live with, especially since he turns out to be a sort-of-Tusken from Tatooine, but Darths Maladi, Kruhl, Maleval, Havok, Rauder, Reave, Stryfe, and Ruyn?
I know they're among the lines of similarly crappy names like Plagueis and Nihilus, but it's literally like watching fifteen-year-olds arguing about what to name their first garage Death Metal band.

Where are Darth Baddthyngz, Darth Spottofbotha and Darth Slite'Inkonvenyenz?

To continue: Darth Stroyer, Darth Trocious, Darth Sploder, Darth Urderer, and Darth Ithead.

# ¿ Aug 19, 2010 21:45

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Throb Robinson posted:

Well he downloaded his mind into a capital ship computer that got covered in magma. The ship was preserved until an earthquake uncovered it. The player does some lovely missions to put him in a new body and gives him a droid army that you have to fight. Then you get the YT-2400 player ship.

lovely story but I love my YT-2400 in a gay way.

I was so disappointed in the video game as the Outrider did not transform the way the toy did. I was all set for it being a big gently caress-off version of the B-Wing.

# ¿ Aug 23, 2010 20:45

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Pththya-lyi posted:

Because on Naboo, government is traditionally run by kids between the ages of 12 and 20. Seriously. It's pretty much for the same reason that we have teen civics programs on Earth: to instill the values of good citizenship in young people.

And like teenagers on Earth, the whole Naboo-Gungan animosity was because the bored Queens of Naboo needed "frenemies".

# ¿ Aug 24, 2010 18:08

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Crowetron posted:

You gonna tell me that Steam Punk Tarkin isn't the classiest motherfucker you've ever seen? Look at that dude! He's approaching Lando levels of Pimp!

Gotta have the pimp cane:

(I don't know why he's just some guy with a tan though.)

# ¿ Aug 26, 2010 17:29

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Fox of Stone posted:

To be fair, it was in the awesome card game. The best part was playing a tusken raider deck back in '98 and trying to pronounce the different names.

Sticking peanut butter in your mouth and then howling a lot worked very well, at least with my friends.

# ¿ Sep 5, 2010 17:21

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

I always thought that the different configuration of the engines in the S-foils' attack position allowed for much greater maneuverability, akin to the Fury from Babylon 5.

# ¿ Sep 13, 2010 22:40

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Chairman Capone posted:

Is this it?

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/File:DarkEmpireFleet.jpg

Does Wookieepedia or the comics have any names and descriptions on those ships that aren't World Devastators or Star Destroyers?

# ¿ Oct 13, 2010 15:12

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

In regards to the shield generators, how come the Star Destroyers shield generators we exposed at almost all angles, but you can't find them easily on Mon Calamari ships? I remember them being noted as not as heavily armed, but being more shielded than their Imperial counterparts.

# ¿ Oct 19, 2010 16:48

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Fox of Stone posted:

Why is Jabba wearing a ring with a knife on it?

It's obviously a pull tab from the Pabzzt Blue Rodian can that he's currently enjoying.

# ¿ Oct 26, 2010 15:34

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

SeanBeansShako posted:

A planet destroying battle station shaped like force cthulhu.

Megamaid with a tentacled face?

# ¿ Oct 27, 2010 21:32

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Hemp Knight posted:

This was a plot point in one of the Marvel SW comics. The Imperial officers on a superweapon called the Tarkin (really) got tired of Vader choking them for making mistakes, so they decided to kill him.

Which of course led to this thing of beauty:

I can't remember who, but someone in the previous two threads dubbed this the Mofference

# ¿ Jan 12, 2011 15:31

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Fox of Stone posted:

Please tell me there's an official canon name for whatever style of fighting this dude uses.

I don't know, but I'm sure it'll translate to something along the lines of "Trying-not-to-slice-one's-balls-off technique"

# ¿ Jan 31, 2011 23:06

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

LLJKSiLk posted:

In Star Wars speak it is probably a saurdino.

You meant Ssi-Ruuvi. I could link the wookieepedia entry, but it's been a pretty good morning and I don't want to ruin anybody's day.

# ¿ May 22, 2011 16:55

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

fuf posted:

Here's a fun game called "identify items, characters and scenes from star wars as depicted in playdough from memory by my five year old nephew".

(please excuse the embarrassing table cloth)

One:

Two:

Three:

Four:

Five:

Six:
:

It's pretty abstract stuff.

Only proper way to respond to this... Showed them to my three-year-old nephew and found out what he thought-

1) Ankylosaurus (he started the dinosaur phase a little early)
2) "L'saber" (original answer was "a snake" but I told him it's from star wars. He made the appropriate 'fwoom fwoom' noises right after his corrected response)
3)"Def Star!!"
4) A leaf
5) Alligator
6) He just made a bunch of beeping and whooping noises. I'll be optimistic and say that he recognized R2-D2.

# ¿ Aug 15, 2012 13:55

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

fuf posted:

Sorry, this might harder than I thought. I guess they are pretty impossible. Hint: he has only seen A New Hope.

Only A New Hope? Then what the heck is 1? I had it pegged as Yoda.

EDIT- It's a Star Destroyer...right?

# ¿ Aug 15, 2012 13:59

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

EddieDean posted:

I'm pretty sure it's a completely unfounded rumour anyway, but yeah, Sith generally take a new name. I doubt she has one, as I really doubt that Lucasarts will go that route.

The new names that Sith take are almost always moronic. They're about the same level as parodies of them.

For example: Darth Stroyer, Darth Howl, Darth Urderer, Darth Iratus, Darth Trocious, Darth Sploder, Darth Kallous and Darth Ithead.

Pick which ones are parodies and which ones are technincally canon.

# ¿ Nov 13, 2012 23:43

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Casimir Radon posted:

But�it was so artistically done.

# ¿ Aug 8, 2014 00:59

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

jivjov posted:

It's a YT-1300 light freighter, not a corvette. A corellian corvette looks like this:

Wait, did they put the rectangular deflector dish that was on what ended up being the Tantive IV in place of the circular one lost on the Falcon in a behind-the-scenes reversal of this

BatteredFeltFedora posted:

that only nerds could appreciate? Abrams might just be as spergy as the rest of us.

# ¿ Nov 29, 2014 14:58

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

SeanBeansShako posted:

I can't wait for the next trailer to tease us with some in game footage!

*as played by real world players.

Stormtrooper looking up at sky runs sideways into a speeder, gets on, and explodes after it goes full throttle into the nearest rock. Repeat 4-5 more times, then we see said stormtroopper disappear as the player ragequits.

# ¿ Apr 19, 2015 16:33

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Chairman Capone posted:

I also think it's kind of funny that, according to the panel, the movie's main inspiration is Zero Dark Thirty... so they of course turned to a director who does giant monster movies. Not that I'm hating on him, I liked both of his movies and I'm looking forward to this one, but just struck me as a strange mental leap.

The same guy directing a movie about how a nigh unstoppable menace is terrorizing population centers with unparalleled destruction and plucky humans trying to stop it? Doesn't seem to be as a big of a leap.

# ¿ Apr 19, 2015 21:37

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

thrawn527 posted:

True, those did suck. And honestly I forgot they existed. Mostly I like running around, slicing up troopers with a light saber, throwing some Force lightning, dangling a trooper over a chasm with the Force and dropping him to his death...fun times.

And they did that so much better with Dark Forces: Jedi Knight. If we could just get one with modern physics and graphics so that the Gran don't look like they have diseased penises atop their heads...

# ¿ Jun 19, 2015 14:55

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Nitramster posted:

Take the entire dark forces series and update them to modern graphics, gameplay, and puzzles and we'd have at least 3 great Star Wars games for the next couple years.

But keep the hammy, over-acted cutscenes please!

# ¿ Jun 19, 2015 19:50

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Flagrant Abuse posted:

Here's your answer. He did inane things like playing with the doors to annoy the Emperor.

If you could get away with trolling the most powerful man in the galaxy, wouldn't you?

# ¿ Dec 1, 2015 23:48

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Chairman Capone posted:

I'm honestly surprised there was never a horse Jedi with a lightsaber unicorn horn at any point in the EU.

No Jedi, but getting there.

# ¿ Dec 18, 2015 02:33

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Casimir Radon posted:

Two days later she rams her bomb-rigged car into his house while muttering "Talifan" under her breath.

A shame she wouldn't know to shout out "Adm. Ackbar!!" to signal the death of infidels.

# ¿ Jan 30, 2016 21:04

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Cythereal posted:

The Empire is huge, and has an enormous demand for fighters. TIE fighters are affordable and can be manufactured in large enough numbers to meet the Empire's needs for strike craft. A-Wings are probably much more expensive, more time consuming to produce, can't be built in enough numbers, or some combination of the above.

That's always been the logic that the old EU uses, quantity vs quality- has there been anything in the NEU with the Empire using that same line of thought?

Arcsquad12 posted:

There's still some stuff in Rebels that baffles me as to why it was changed. Like making the A-Wing a product of Kuat Systems Engineering. It begs the question why the Empire never used the fighters.

I would love a couple of episodes where they just raid Old Republic boneyards to get some old mothballed Y-wings with mismatched outer casings.

# ¿ Feb 4, 2016 01:01

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Doctor Spaceman posted:

I assumed the similarity to "smoke" was a big part of the reason.

Yeah, I assumed the same thing. Hux being the charismatic face guy, and Kylo being the feared enforcer. He's not making the same mistake of being a nice juicy target like good old Palps was.

# ¿ Mar 24, 2016 16:09

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Chairman Capone posted:

Miraluka.

I contend this is still the worst demonym in the old EU.

# ¿ Apr 13, 2016 15:10

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Ensign_Ricky posted:

So um, these sculptures in the back...

Ysalamiri??

Not furry enough? I was thinking either Krayt or a call back to the Zillo beast.

# ¿ Jul 17, 2016 05:23

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

SeanBeansShako posted:

We honestly need something that is the opposite of Obi-Wan's sacrifice in terms of old Jedi on former Jedi fights.

Vader: "I have no time for you, old man." [starts force choking Chirrut]
Chirrut: [gasping] "Good, this will take but a moment." [triggers explosives on his belt and staff]

# ¿ Oct 17, 2016 19:42

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

ecureuilmatrix posted:

Yeah, I think it has a lot to do with first impressions. First time we see Thrawn, he dismantles an enemy fleet with guile and insight while being depicted as mysterious and wise; first time with Zsinj, he's told a kiss a Wookiee before his ship gets blown up while being made a buffoon. Thanks Aaron for making something out of that.

I'd say another thing is Zahn follows the films in having the situation get steadily more desperate until the very end. Thrawn's errors and miscues take a longer time to pay out. Meanwhile, Allston has the Wraiths pull a few big ones among Zsinj's successes.

But yes, WRAITH SQUADRON SHOW NOWPLZ

If they could take a bit of seriousness out of something like Space: Above amd Beyond without it becoming a Whedon- eries wannabe or really campy like the original BSG, that would be my ideal Wraiths tv show.

# ¿ Dec 4, 2016 21:08

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Tumblr of scotch posted:

Hopefully never, there would be no way for any movie to do it justice without being like 15 hours long.

20 hours if they do all the sidequests.

# ¿ Dec 21, 2016 04:13

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

Chairman Capone posted:

I actually liked this given, unless I'm misremembering, the girl's mother seems as pissed at Jyn as she is at the imperials and just snatches her kid back from Jyn.

Saw this yesterday, it seemed like she was just hysterical- with no directed anger.

# ¿ Dec 27, 2016 18:58

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# ¿ May 6, 2024 16:45

tribbledirigible: Jul 27, 2004; I finally beat the internet. The end boss was hard.

ImpAtom posted:

Here is the rule of Star Wars:

Did you see an alien do something onscreen? That means it is literally the gift of their entire species. They come from entire races of bounty hunters, or mechanics, or strategists.

But this would make Hera and her dad the black sheep of their family for not going into the exotic dance/catering and villainous majordomo business respectively.

# ¿ Dec 29, 2016 20:29

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The Book Barn > Geeky Star Wars Loser Thread Episode VII: Attack of the bugnest orgies

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