[UK] The Great British programme discussion: Piers Morgan Memorial Pier

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > TV IV > [UK] The Great British programme discussion: Piers Morgan Memorial Pier

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Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo"

Haha, this film is up there with The Room in terms of terrible.

# ¿ Jan 22, 2011 19:00

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# ¿ May 16, 2024 11:51

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Crackerman posted:

The only remotely enjoyable part of the prequels is Ian McDiarmid's performance in the third one where he throws all pretences of there being anything good about the films out of the window and hams it up to an amazing degree.

I saw all three of those bloody films in the cinema out of some sense of obligation, I'm never sitting through them again.

vvv The problem with a lot of CGI is it doesn't date in a "quaint" way like practical effects do, like models or puppets or whatever, it just looks flat and weird after a few years instead.

The problem with the noooooo is that you're expecting some kind of rage fueled scream, but he's screaming no like a prissy little bitch.

I dunno, i thought Ewan McGreggor's Obiwan was pretty damned fantastic. I would have said that was the only good thing to emerge from the prequels. The entire last fight was good up until how it ended. Obiwan won because he was standing a bit higher up on a slope :what:

It has put me in the mood for watching episode 4-6 though (or at the very least playing lego star wars again).

edit: Primevil is also terrible. How on earth do i get into TV so i can fix all of this bollocks? :colbert:

Kin fucked around with this message at 20:44 on Jan 22, 2011

# ¿ Jan 22, 2011 20:41

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

DaWolfey posted:

Mike McIntorycunt wins best male tv comedian.

(against harry hill and david mitchell)

edit: British Comedy Awards, CH4.

Death. Of. Comedy.

edit: I guess it really pays off if you turn up as an act with a gimmicky form of presentation regurgitating the same generalist jokes that everyone's heard before.

edit2: Would i lie to you is better than Have I got News For You? :suicide:

Kin fucked around with this message at 22:28 on Jan 22, 2011

# ¿ Jan 22, 2011 22:20

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Ding ding. Finally a decent winner. :dance:

edit: Fuckity bye

# ¿ Jan 22, 2011 22:46

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Did we all miss some kind of secret comedy show or something where Miranda proved that she was the funniest person in the UK?

Kin fucked around with this message at 00:14 on Jan 23, 2011

# ¿ Jan 23, 2011 00:06

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Metrication posted:

Yes but the BBC operates under the idea that if they cause any kind of offence to anybody (no matter how small) it will increase their chances of losing the license fee.

Well the news this morning was going on about a new scottish digital channel takig funds from the licence fee.

We don't need local stations because gently caress all ever happens here that's worth making any shows about.

# ¿ Jan 23, 2011 15:07

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Metrication posted:

I wonder how the collapse of the newspapers in the next couple of years will affect politician's decision making process. Will be interesting to see wether they will have the balls to do the right thing instead of backing down all the time.

Next couple of years? Newspaper rags will be around for a lot longer than that. Especially if 30% of the country is full of the type of ignorant cunts who do nothing but read The Sun and watch Sky News.

edit: Even moreso with the Tories in charge.

Kin fucked around with this message at 19:57 on Jan 23, 2011

# ¿ Jan 23, 2011 19:55

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Metrication posted:

Okay maybe I should have said ten years, but still their sales are dropping year on year. Their influence hopefully should have wayne somewhat within a decade.

For them to vanish, there needs to be an outright eradication of my parents' generation. My parents are in their 50's just now, so that's about another 20 years or so.

You're massively overestimating the reach/influence of non-printed news saturation throughout the UK. Granted, from our generation onwards there's obviously going to be a steady decline, but there are a lot of older people in the country who will still buy newspapers until they day they die.

Newspapers and tabloids will still be here well after 10 years from now and even if they arent, their replacements in the form of TV news/stations/networks will still be preaching the same bollocks for decades to come.

# ¿ Jan 24, 2011 00:12

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Akuma posted:

Did you miss the BBC guy (I forget who he was, someone at the top) pushing for them to be allowed to be biased? And that Fox News was good? Yeah.

Not to mention that if you pay attention to the news you can actually see the biased subtext.

Nick whatshisface from the BBC, for example, is a die hard Tory supporter and it shows immensely in his "non biased" ploitical reports. Same thing with Sky news.

On top of that, it only takes one 20 minute scan of the news headlines online to see the things the news stations here aren't reporting on which, in turn, shows a higher level of bias because for a lot of people finding out news from tabloids/TV is the only way they care to.

# ¿ Jan 24, 2011 11:52

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Someone tell me what's wrong with Outcasts. I refuse to belive that a sci-fi show on BBC will be good in any way shape or form.

# ¿ Jan 24, 2011 22:07

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

bobkatt013 posted:

Doctor Who is an awesome show and its on BBC

sebzilla posted:

Let me rephrase. Sci-fi drama. An no, new Doctor Who is a terrible, terrible loving show.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2011 00:23

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

goatface posted:

He's saying that it will be cheaper to build a standalone music/radio player than to integrate with iplayer. I'm not sure how that's meant to work, but it probably comes down to budget shuffling rather than actual savings.

I really don't get what they're thinking though. Nobody wants to have a multitude of different things installed to play different things. Iplayer is great because it has all of their media content on one site.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2011 16:36

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Well this seems like bollocks. It appears that up here in scotland BBC2 is, at 10pm, showing "The World According to Robert Burns".

gently caress you BBC, we already know about Robert loving Burns, we need more Charlie Brooker.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2011 22:22

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Rarity posted:

This is what iPlayer was made for.

Unless that is locked onto the Scottish version too?

Nah, picking it up on iplayer should be fine. But it's still a pain in the arse.

I mean poo poo, it's not like we've loving forgot who Robert Burns is and anyone up at this age is old enough to know and subsequently not give a gently caress about the damned night.

Stick this poo poo on BBC Alba or whatever Highland Gaelic channel there is not the whole of Scotland.

DaWolfey posted:

drat, Konnie really changed the look of his front room.

gently caress you too. This is not happening lalalalalalalalalalala

# ¿ Jan 25, 2011 23:08

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

TheVertigoOfBliss posted:

You are just a loving idiot.

What does Burns have to do with;

a] Gaelic?
b]The highlands?

And you're a moron?

I bet if you were to take a survey, you'd find that the highland/gaelic areas are a hell of a lot more traditional than almost all the other parts of the country.

Of course you could just pull your touchy little head out from your tightly squeezing arse cheeks and realise i was being facetious. :rolleyes:

Christ, you're like that guy in the Scotland LAN thread who had a stick up his arse because he didn't like people calling Dundee the shithole that it is.

# ¿ Jan 26, 2011 00:05

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Tuned into it on iplayer this morning. As far as i'm concerned it's just screenwipe with a different branding.

# ¿ Jan 26, 2011 12:45

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

In Question Time, who was that wildly ignorant oval office, wearing the 80's shoulders and the smug look of dim witted superiority, on the far right of the panel? Every time she spoke or was in shot of the camera I really just wanted to punch her face in, and that's not sexist because i'm going by her rules so she's loving earned it.

# ¿ Jan 28, 2011 01:25

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Irisi posted:

It's baffling. I don't understand why or how they live with these problems for years. Especially the bloke walking about with a hernia the size of a newborn baby hanging off his abdomen Surely the first time you saw it poking out and wobbling gently you would be like "Welp, time to see a surgeon"

Sometimes these hings grow from nothing over a period of time at which point the individual has grow accustom to it being there and accepts that it's a part of them so don't think it's something that needs to be sorted.

# ¿ Jan 28, 2011 22:36

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

DougieFFC posted:

So Channel One (formerly Virgin 1) is being closed tonight. A bit of trivia is that this is the larges channel ever to close down on British TV (Bravo holds the record as far as market share goes).

That's cool, i'll just be watching Dave, C4 and more 4 anyway.

# ¿ Jan 31, 2011 18:04

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Pablo Bluth posted:

Dave might not be around for much longer. They lost a trademark battle, and if they can't win on appeal, they'll have to rename

Trademark? With who? I can't think of any recognisable brand off the top of my head that's called Dave.

No-one gives a crap about the name anyway, it's got a reputation of showing the best funny bits of the BBC so calling it somethign else probably wouldn't make that much of a difference.

# ¿ Jan 31, 2011 22:44

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

cloudchamber posted:

Apparently there's a brand consultancy company called Dave who've been fighting them in a trademark battle since the channel rebranded.

Ahahah, most ironic thing of the month.

# ¿ Jan 31, 2011 23:18

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Brown Moses posted:

Charlie Brooker thing on at 10pm BBC 2.

For some reason the digital signal in my area has been utter bollocks the last few days and i can only presume that it's dow to the weather.

So unless it clears up it looks like this is week 2 where i can't watch the show on the night. :smith:

# ¿ Feb 1, 2011 22:48

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

cloudchamber posted:

Stream it live on iPlayer:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/tv/bbc_two_england/watchlive

I did not know about the live viewing! :dance:

Which is awesome because inbetween the gorss pixellation i can see that BBC2 is once again showing more "The world according to Robert Burns" :suicide:

# ¿ Feb 1, 2011 23:05

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Charlie Brooker posted:

You could use a picture of Mickey Rourke to scare a child away from a plate of cookies

Amazing.

Kin fucked around with this message at 23:31 on Feb 1, 2011

# ¿ Feb 1, 2011 23:23

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Metrication posted:

I dunno, it seems to get better every week. I actually laughed during this weeks episode which is something I guess.

The problem with LeBlanc is that he appears to just be playing a more sweary, less retarded, slightly antagonistic Joey.

It's bad because he's either typecasting himself further or it shows that he's a very bad actor if he was more or less acting a nice version of himself in Friends and Joey.

Either way, when i'm watching it, i feel that i'm watching Joey "Real life edition" which is odd.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2011 00:44

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Hoops posted:

Of course he reminds you of Joey, because you've seen Friends a thousand times and he shares the same face and vocal chords. He's playing a smart alec, arrogant, depressed, manipulative, hollywood big shot with a huge ego. I don't see how any of that is like Joey.

It goes beyond face and vocal cords. There are loads of little mannerisms that are either forcably being put into the performance or are actually him.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2011 02:19

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Metrication posted:

Sounds like I'm not missing anything then. Is there ever any dubstep in the charts? I'm partial to some of that.

Dunno if this is what you're looking for but one of my mates does dubstep stuff and he just sent me this facebook group invite (literally 45 minutes ago) about some podcast thing he's doing with a lot of different dubstep artists and whatnot.

http://www.facebook.com/!/home.php?sk=group_183171788371293&ap=1

I've got sweet gently caress all idea about how facebook, groups and podcasts work (well i know how podcasts work, but i don't know how it all synchs up with that facebook group thing), but he's not just some dude who kickss about in his garage as he's done some DJing stuff and has his tracks played on XFM? or something.

edit: actually, i'm retarded and the link is somwhere down the bottom of the messages;

Dubstep ahoy - http://insight.dfrnt.co.uk/

# ¿ Feb 2, 2011 18:17

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

goatface posted:

My local HMV doesn't even sell CD singles any more. Makes it irritating when you actually want one.

What kind of primitive still uses a CD player? Guffaw i say to you, guffaw!

In all seriousness though, i think it's high time shops adopted a digital distribution system where you can pop in and buy an MP3 right there in the store and have it transfered to whatever device you've got on you (or a link emailed to you at home where you can then click and download it or something along those lines).

# ¿ Feb 2, 2011 18:29

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Am i the only one somewhat repulsed by Michel Roux's Service?

I've worked in hospitality before and it really is a lovely, thankless, overy stressful, underpaid line of work and to see it glorified as some kind of wonderjob for these people to aspire to is heartbreaking.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2011 21:16

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Sion posted:

Did you work at a Nanodo's or somewhere nice?

Old Course Hotel in St. Andrews.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2011 21:48

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Hoops posted:

I know what you mean. I've been quite enjoying the series but I feel awful for the kids in it that the prize is to be a loving waiter. I have no idea what the tips are like in high-end service but there's no way it can be enough to justify them devoting their entire career to it when they're about 17.

While the place i worked was hoity toity (5 red stars whatever that means) i don't know how it would comepare to some of the places that these guys would be going into. Plus my place fit into the golfing demograph so may have different characteristics and expectations and whatnot.

Either way, tips were ok, but depended wildly on the customers. I think my higest sum was about �100, but i can't recall if that was for a weeks or two weeks work cumulative work over the busiest period of the year.

Either way, it's not a good way to live your life, i.e. hoping that the value of tips you get that week will be enough to help you pay your bills.

Hah, but what am i saying, they won't have high bills because they'll be too busy pulling triple shifts, skirting the very rims of legality, as their management try to milk them for all the worth they can get.

Akuma posted:

Why? Why would shops need to do this, especially if you had to download the song at home anyway where you could just use iTunes/Amazon/whatever anyway? Shops don't need to be connected to digital distribution at all, that's the whole point of it...

That's not the whole point of digital distribution. The point of it is ease of access, so you can buy your music from home in a versatile format, not that you need to.

As Flatscan said, shops don't need to, but it's downright closeminded and self destructive to not attempt it. CD sales are decreasing, digital sales are increasing, but people are still going into towns and shops though.

So what do you do? Turn your stores into digital distribution hubs. That way the millions of people floating about town with their portable music players can go into the shop, see/hear marketing for new albums of whatever and then purchase them right then and there in the format they prefer instead of traipsing back home to remember to buy it from their computer.

On top of that is the lower costs in terms of distribution/stock/store shelf space, etc and if HMV or whatever were to shift to launch individual digital distribution online stores you've got increased competition in the MP3 marketplace (HMV have actually launched an online MP3 service by the way) resulting in greater competitive pricing.

MP3's aren't some kind of magical computer access only item. They're a product and right now places like HMV and whatever other stores aren't stocking them on their shelves despite there being a massive demand for them.

The system for downloading at home would be for if you're in the shop anyway, see somethign you like but don't have your device on you. You can purchase a code (while you're there) and when you get home, punch it into your online HMV DD account and download your purchase.

I think someone in one of the games threads mentioned that China already do something along these lines.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2011 13:49

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

bitterandtwisted posted:

I once worked for waterstones and we could turn off our own lights, but that was about the limit of our freedom. Everything was decided centrally: what everything cost, the special offers, what the displays looked like, what the staff wore (my shop was previously an independent one with no polyester jumper uniforms) and what every level of employee got paid. We had a little bit of freedom in what we stocked, but that was mostly limited to local interest stuff. We couldn't refuse to have three display stands of celebrity autobiographies if the regional office wanted us to.

I was always under the impression that every Waterstones had a front of house and a back of house.

The front contained all of the up to date new releases, the charts and all that other stuff you're likely to find in Tesco, but the back contained large categories of all topics (and maybe a costa coffee). What's strange is that when i've gone into the one in Dundee over the last few years it's been a barren wasteland through the back with empty shelves and paltry offerings for some categories.

Are things like Amazon and Tesco really crushing book stores?

# ¿ Feb 3, 2011 19:56

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Flatscan posted:

People in Dundee can read?

Well it is full of students from all over for 9 months of the year.

The other 3 months... not so much. :smith:

# ¿ Feb 3, 2011 20:51

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Metrication posted:

There was a costa in my local waterstones a couple of years back. A friend of mine would buy a coffee and read an entire book and then leave.

I'm sure the intent was to encourage people to sit down with a book and perhaps read a little of it, then being thoroughly hooked, they'd proceed to buy it. Though some people read really fast and some people are just moochers who would come back every day and read another chapter i suppose. :/

I like the idea of coffee shops inside bookshops though. While i don't consider myself a twonky snob, there's something that's relaxing about that kind of thing and it's an odd sensation to have in a place that's often smack bang in the middle of a city centre or wherever.

A coffee shop will typically have a loud chatty "cafe" atmosphere, bookshops alone (like WH smith) are full of people just prattling away too and it feels like a newsagent's, but the combination of the two seems to induce this slightly hushed area of comteplation where you can sit and relax in an otherwise heavilly busy place.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2011 21:09

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Daedo posted:

The Waterstones store where I live (Falkirk) is tiny and yet filled with nothing but shite books. They've cut down on other sections to make a whole section with the heading 'Dark Romance' I poo poo you not. Thanks Twilight/True Blood for making hundreds of crappy imitations...

I havent even bothered to go in there since i've been back, the entire highstreet is just depressing because it's so run down.

There used to be this awesome little bookshop down by Greigs near Asda. It was one of those non chain ones, but it had a bit of everything including some really cool art supplies. It closed down well over a decade ago though. :smith:

What Waterstones needs to do is move out from the highstreet and go somewhere like the Retail park where it could get a much bigger shop and a lot more people would have access to it. The highstreet is just too awkward to get into these days and all the other high traffic stores are out there too.

# ¿ Feb 3, 2011 23:59

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Lady Galaga posted:

Like the Dundee Borders was?

The Dundee Borders closed because Borders went into administration and closed all 45 of their stores.

On top of that the Dundee Borders was in a small retail park that contained a Matalan, a JJB gym and some mothercare type store i think. It was located in what was typically known as the lovely end of town next to the docks where there are also no shops of high interest. It's also not that easy to get into and involves navigating a retarded series of roundabouts and traffic lights.

The retail park in Falkirk is quite large; is located just outside the town centre on one of the main roads leading into the town centre; contains the Tesco superstore, Halfords, Homebase, Next, JJB, Argos, Mc Donalds, Pizza Hut, Curry's/Comet The Early Learning Centre, Maplins, the multiscreen Cineworld and many more shops that were typically found on the highstreet in years gone by. It's also directly across the road from the train station and is free to park there.

So yes, a Waterstones there would be a much better idea than being stuck on a run down highstreet that's hard to gain quick access to.

# ¿ Feb 4, 2011 00:28

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

goatface posted:

Retail parks are evil.

The thing is, well designed and populated retail parks are actually improved versions of high streets.

Old towns like Falkirk have a bad habit of having a centre not designed with modern forms of transport in mind. As such they end up as a mishmash of roads, single one way systems, junctions and oddly shaped shopping centres in order to give people easier forms of access.

Along comes a retail park with a huge number of parking spaces with two or more easy routes of access and all the big chain stores flock to it because it will naturally have a higher footfall.

edit: Just finished watching 10 live on 4+1 and i think if there's another series they can film it in front of a live audience if they like, but it needn't be shot "live" live. That would help with all the pacing issues.

Kin fucked around with this message at 01:04 on Feb 4, 2011

# ¿ Feb 4, 2011 01:01

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Dr Snofeld posted:

I miss that Borders. The fact that the building is still there, and nobody's done anything with it, is kinda depressing. It's just sitting there, empty. Like a literary Pripyat.

Somewhat poetically, the Reading Rooms should buy it.

# ¿ Feb 4, 2011 03:33

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Rapey Joe Stalin posted:

It's hilarious that the Top Gear viewers in the thread on here don't get Lee, and can't see what is wrong with the Mexican comments. It is like they are stereotypes of Top Gear viewers.

It's also hilarious watching the morons in there kick off with knee jerk reactions that anyone who disagrees with them is a flat out racist, racist, RACIST, RAAAAAACIIIIIST.

This is why shows like Episodes are thing that actually happen.

# ¿ Feb 6, 2011 19:11

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# ¿ May 16, 2024 11:51

Kin: Nov 4, 2003; Sometimes, in a city this dirty, you need a real hero.

Rapey Joe Stalin posted:

It never fails to amaze me how much you always miss the point in things Rapey.

# ¿ Feb 6, 2011 21:52

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > TV IV > [UK] The Great British programme discussion: Piers Morgan Memorial Pier

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