|
Sporadic posted:This would be the next scene. The idea is that the shot would open on a closeup of Maggie (first time she is introduced) and stay there until it is revealed that Katherine is sitting across from her. As far as I can tell, what you have written suitably implies what you want without "directing" the scene yourself. I would suggest, however, revising that line to make it active voice; something like "Katherine sits across from her, mortified, in an identical uniform." Sporadic posted:Also, should I remove the (CONT'D) from behind each MAGGIE? Final Draft automatically added them but I don't think it is right (isn't it suppose to be used for when dialog goes from one page to another?) I think it's justified in this case, since it's essentially a monologue broken up by small actions.
|
#
¿
May 29, 2011 12:51
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 5, 2024 23:41 |
|
|
The_Doctor posted:I'd argue for (O.S.) myself. Voice-over just reads as narration stuff to me. And you're right, you don't need to keep putting it every time. What book is that? It seems slightly outdated. Yeah, I feel like (V.O.) implies a detachment from the scene, whereas (O.S.) can really apply to anything that is off-screen but diegetic.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 20, 2011 20:01
|
|
|
Magic Hate Ball posted:I do that with every film that features witty zingers because I'm terrible at witty zingers. Same here, and it's one of the reasons I'm trying to get out of the habit of writing witty zingers. The other reason is that when I write "witty zingers", it clutters up my pages to the point where 2 pages of dialogue only cover about 30 seconds of dialogue--although that's probably more indicative of me writing too much dialogue. Any tips for someone trying to write (for lack of a better term) "visually" and overcome his dependence on dialogue?
|
|
#
¿
Sep 20, 2011 03:18
|
|
|
In retrospect, I think the problem is that I rely too much on dialogue in general; characters tend to just stand around and talk (sometimes walk and talk, which isn't much better), and I can't think of things for them to actually do.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 21, 2011 02:02
|
|
|
Jaydebob posted:Any of you have any experience writing musicals? Or am I in the completely wrong place? I'm actually working on one right now, so you're not totally alone.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 28, 2011 23:37
|
|
|
Magic Hate Ball posted:How's that going? There are probably dozens of books you guys could read on the subject but Sondheim's Finishing The Hat is nearly priceless (as, I expect, will be part 2, which is due out in a couple months), and it's always, always worth it to read Jeffrey Hatcher's The Art And Craft Of Playwriting. Bookwriters are under-appreciated, remember that in any good musical the songs should come from the book, sometimes directly, in which part of a scene is replaced by a song. For example, "Franklin Shepard, Inc.", from Merrily We Roll Along, was originally a five-minute interview scene that without the crazed figures and patters of the song doesn't have much impact. What kinda projects are these? Interestingly, the musical aspect of it has been the easiest part (probably because this isn't my first musical--although it is my first musical screenplay). The songs come from the book, but they're not "book songs"; think Cabaret, where the songs are diegetic but also serve as commentary on the main action. My problem has been the "book" part of it--nailing down the plot--although I think I'm finally getting somewhere. I'm definitely with you on Finishing the Hat, by the way. Part 2 can't get here soon enough.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 29, 2011 03:37
|
|
|
Magic Hate Ball posted:What trouble are you having with the plot? And yeah, Look I Made A Hat is pretty much a day-one buy for me. I think I've read the first one like six times. Well, initially, I had characters but basically no story. I'm at the point now where I've pretty much got a central plot line (three-act structure and all), but I'm not totally certain on some of the smaller events/scenes.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 29, 2011 04:01
|
|
|
Griff M. posted:Story Structure is legitimately my favorite thing in the entire world. It's baffling how many writers don't seem to understand it. It's so awesome. With some writers, I don't think it's so much that they don't understand structure as it is that they refuse to understand it because they think it'll make their screenplays "formulaic." Which is a crock of poo poo.
|
|
#
¿
Nov 5, 2011 13:50
|
|
|
DivisionPost posted:Deep down, I think they already do, but they can't be bothered to learn the rules that they're breaking, so they put up this arrogant facade and write these meandering pieces of poo poo under the guise of being a fresh, different voice. They're not just rebels without a cause, they're rebels who pretend to have a cause. And it's really a shame, because the whole reason you learn the rules is so that you can break them. I wonder how many of those writers are literally the stereotype, just sitting around in Starbucks all day, desperately trying to write the next Pulp Fiction.
|
|
#
¿
Nov 5, 2011 22:27
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 5, 2024 23:41 |
|
|
Maxwell Lord posted:What do you do when a screenplay's too short? I'm still in progress on one so this may not be a problem, but it's a concern with how spare it is- it's a horror/thriller kind of thing so I'd worry about adding too much (I arguably spend too long setting up the characters already). And it's already too long for a short film so it's sort of a Dark Star situation. This is a common problem for me as well. I've noticed that (at least for me) a too short screenplay typically suggests structural issues. And while over dependence on structure is (rightly) frowned upon, doing some sort of structural analysis can help identify trouble spots. My system involves dividing 90-100 (the number of pages I typically shoot for) by the number of acts in the script. This will be the average length of each act*. Go through your script and count the number of pages in each of your acts.** You'll find that some acts go above the average, and others fall short. It's the latter you will want to focus on beefing up. *The acts need not (and probably should not) be equal in length. **The added bonus is that this exercise can also help you figure out where your act breaks are. Again, it's not a cure-all, but I have seen improvements this way.
|
|
#
¿
Jul 29, 2013 18:40
|
|