- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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A lot of people in here are regulars or visitors on other soccer forums, or maybe read something insane in a comments section somehwere, but wherever you find your terrible posts about soccer please bring them back here for all of us to laugh at. If you don't want to be grassed up you can paste them unsourced, or if you want to bring attention to somewhere terrible you can do that too. I just ask that this thread remain for bad posts we can all laugh at. IT IS NOT FOR ARGUING ABOUT THE CONTENT. If the content doesn't seem insane enough to be funny to everyone in here, it's not funny enough to post. If it's sort of borderline it's just going to cause annoying slapfights when someone starts the "Well this post isn't that insane if you look at it in the context ofaaaaaaaaaaaa" who cares gently caress you.
In summation:
find really really really bad/crazy/funny posts
post them here
keep your replies light and lmao heavy
an occasional emptyquote is fine
if it's not really out there or you feel like debating a pasted post, turn 360 degrees and walk away from this thread
ok go
Somebody fucked around with this message at 18:49 on Oct 31, 2014
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Nov 26, 2010 05:59
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Apr 29, 2024 07:46
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Iggy Pop Barker posted:
are off-topic posts from other football forums kosher because loving hell
Let's steer clear of anything non-football, it will make the thread weird and stupid really fast
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Nov 26, 2010 06:30
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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lol
quote:First off let me tell you that Construction workers are nothing like enslaved, specially in Qatar. I know this because I'm a journalist and I went to Qatar recently especially to report on a similar story.
What happens is that the construction company orders construction workers from a recruiting company. They specify that the workers must know the safety procedures, including using equipment and so on. However the recruitment companies find it cheaper to actually forge that certificate. So workers go there unfortunately no nothing at all about safety and one accident after another ensue.
So the government need to work on that, is it slavery? hardly. It's less severe than Mexican workers who go to the US (illegal immigration).
But workers work for 9 hours including an hour lunch break (that is the law in Qatar). They are provided with housing and transportation (although housing thy get is in ghetto areas).
But they make much more money than had they worked any where else in the world.
And it is a fact that they make more money than teachers in Egypt.
It could be different in other Gulf countries, but I'm positive about Qatar because I reported from their.
Arab "states" did not exist until the 20th century, slavery ended in their with th arrival of Islam. Mohammed banished slavery and adopted a former slave as his own and assigned another as "imam" responsible for calling people to prayer.
Even in the modern world, England crimes far exceed that of Qatar. World Wars, going into Afghanistan and Iraq and killing innocent soldiers and innocent local families for unfounded reasons (there are documents that prove its about oil and I'm more than happy to PM you those documents).
You have Ex pats from England who go work in Qatar, do you have it the other way around?
English Ex pats, just like from any other country, come to Qatar because it provide them with a standard of living their countries cannot deal with. Isn't that a crime against humanity? Isn't raising tuition fees and forbidding a large sector from getting higher education and practically destroying their future a crime against humanity?
May be that's why England got two votes.
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Dec 2, 2010 19:55
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Chuggo posted:
bob from britain i'm almost certain is my big bro trolling :3
The Diana line was way too unsubtle imho
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Dec 3, 2010 16:04
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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quote:
Too much shite is posted on here. We need to sort this out, once and for all.
I think Rafa is a better attacking coach than Roy.
He is also a better defensive coach.
When it comes to fitness, I think Roy slightly edges it.
But Roy is shite at coaching goalkeepers.
I suppose they’re equally as good at man management.
Rafa is well more mental than Roy.
And Rafa would definitely outshine him tactically.
Technically, I think Roy is slightly better, but only by a bit.
I always get the feeling that Roy adapts well to situations, he is perfect.
But when it comes to determination, Rafa is the man. He’s very determined.
When it comes to judging a player’s ability, Roy is probably better.
But when trying to judge potential ability, Rafa is better.
Rafa also has a better level of discipline.
But Roy is better at motivating the team.
Roy is shite at physiotherapy, he may as well not bother.
But his tactical knowledge is better than Rafa’s.
Both managers prefer a 4-3-3 formation.
Rafa tells his players to close down, but Hodgson can’t make his mind up.
Rafa has a defensive coaching style, but Hodgson has a more general mindset.
Rafa likes direct football, but Roy prefers to pass the ball about a bit.
I would say that Rafa has balanced approach, but Roy is more adventurous.
Rafa sets his team with zonal marking, but Roy likes to mix it.
Hmmm, I think Rafa has excellent knowledge of the Spanish and English transfer markets and good knowledge of the rest, especially in South America.
Roy is poo poo hot on the English market, but there’s not many who know the Finnish transfer market better than him. But he’s not that good in other countries.
My conclusion:
Rafa is a better manager than Roy. He’s about 5.6% better than him. Shame that he’s loving Spanish.
(Please click on the graphics below for proof).
It's a wind-up but it's hooked quite a few
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Dec 22, 2010 17:48
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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look at this
quote:
After tonight's debacle I decided to sit down and do some research on the man currently called Royston Vontavius Hodgson XVII. Delving deeper than the usual "35 years" I found some information out about the man that I thought most people might not know about. Something to give us all a bit of perspective in this tumultuous time for our club.
Roy began his life, believe it or not, as a great leader of men.
Isildur Roy Hodgson deciding not to destroy the ring of Sauron.
Isildur Roy Hodgson
Picture the scene: You are battling against an army of unimaginable proportion and strength. The leader of that army, a loving massive guy made a sharp black metal, has a ring that he can use to beat you, no matter what you do. Pretty hopeless? Well not according Elendil Hodgson, Roy's father. Being full of hardy English mettle, this old man walked right up to his opponent and cut the weapon out of his hand. He died doing it, but more importantly, he killed his opponent as well.
Now Roy was left with a choice. The weapon was given to him, as his father's heir. Should he destroy it or keep it? Destroying it would mean that his enemy was utterly vanquished forever. Keeping it meant there was a risk of him coming back one day. A no brainer. But Roy being Roy, he decided to keep it. If that wasn't enough, he wore it around his neck on a chain, like a loving bullseye to all his enemies. When his generals warned him against it he just mumbled incoherently and told them he had "35 years experience" of wearing magic rings around his neck. Only problem with that was the rings he'd been wearing around his neck were of paltry magic. Some of them could turn off milk good again. Others created a force field around you to protect you from bad breath.
So what happens? You guessed it, Roy was slain by his enemies, dying with a "Wibble" and the ring was lost for thousands of years. During those years his enemy secretly rebuilt his power, eventually seeking out his lost ring.
Denethor Roy Hodgson
Denethor Roy Hodgson enjoying a frappuccino.
Now by the time the enemy had rebuilt his power, he had a most formidable opponent in the land of Gondor who went by the name of Denethor Roy Hodgson. He was a direct descendant of Isildur, but on the stupid side of the family.
Hearing of the recovery of the ring that Isildur had so spectacularly failed to destroy all those years ago, the old fool rubbed his hands together with glee (also his favourite tv show), and requested that his son Boromir Poulsen Hodgson retreive it for him. Unfortunately the documents I uncovered do not go into detail about what happened to Boromir, but they do say he died. There are suggestions that he was slain by numerous arrows to the chest, being totally incapable of defending himself, and really slow at attacking. But those are spurious rumours.
A publicity shot of Boromir Poulsen Hodgson taken before his fateful trip in search of the Ring.
Now that the ring was lost to him, he blamed his younger son Faramir Paul loving Konchesky Hodgson. Roy was genuinely shocked when Faramir came back from an important stronghold which he had allowed to fall into enemy hands. Why this was a surprise to him was anyone's guess. The popular left-leaning newspaper The Gondorian, in particular, pointed to a long history of defensive lapses made by Faramir in battle, but Roy seemed oblivious, simply rubbing his face when asked for comment.
Faramir Paul loving Konchesky Hodgson posing for a photo with a crowd of fans.
Eventually, with his city surrounded by enemies, Roy decided that the best form of attack was to set himself alight and dive off the top level of the seven-levelled city. Again, this tactic was atrocious, but it worked better than any of his previous tactics, in that some of his enemies fell to the floor laughing and ended up choking to death on vomit. He later described this as a "famous victory" despite his city lying in ruins and actually being dead.
Pontius Roy Hodgson
Pontius Roy Hodgson being requested to save Bwian from crucifixion by his subjects. This real life speech impediment would later inspire Michael Palin's portrayal of him in The Passion of The Christ
Now we enter the footballing era of Roy's historical legacy. His first job as manager saw him take charge of the Roman Empire. It was during this time that he oversaw the decline of the Roman first team. His mistakes are too numerous to recount here so I will concentrate one the one which has gone down as his biggest.
You may be familiar with the name Jesus Christ?
Of course we all know he was the left winger who went on to be one of the biggest stars in world football for almost two thousand years. But back then he was just a promising young talent. After a few appearances for the first team, Roy was starting to grow impatient with the tricky speedster, who had been singled out as one of the team's most inconsistent performers. In six appearances Jesus had set up no goals and hadn't even hit a shot on target. There was some controversy when Roy was recorded as saying that Jesus "Couldn't hit a cross if he was nailed to one." This sparked a feud between the two which culminated in Roy actually having Jesus nailed to a cross for three days and nights in an attempt to "familiawise him" to crosses. This method was contrary to the "arm around the shoulder" method that Roy had, somehow, become synonymous with during his short spell in Rome.
Jesus Christ playing for Barcelona in 2009 amid rumours of an imminent retirement.
Rome's misfortunes mounted after this, with several loses to rivals Carthage, managed by future Barcelona manager Hannibal, Roy saw his popularity hit an all time low and the board were forced to sack him in the face of a peasant revolt. He was replaced with Caligula. Roy himself used what was left of his reputation to secure the Bordeaux job.
Napoleon Roy Hodgson
There is a huge gap in the record after his time in Rome and he doesn't resurface until the late 18th century in France. Eyebrows were raised when Napoleon Roy Hodgson was given the France job. His predecessor was so unpopular that he had literally been guillotined. Roy knew from the off that he needed big results to appease the demanding fans of Les Bleus. To be fair to him, his early results were more than anyone expected after the previous regime's mismanagment. He unified the players and the fans under the same banner and went on a march throughout Europe that no one saw coming, winning three consecutive European Championships and a World Cup (although participation in the World Cup was much less at this point, it was still seen as a more difficult cup to win).
Napoleon Roy Hodgson posing for a Panini sticker album for the 1810 European Championships
Things seemed to be going incredibly well for Roy, until a poor Qualifying campaign for the 1814 European Championships, saw a French squad wracked by injuries, travel to Russia in a win or bust match. Roy, as he had become accustomed to in his time in France, set his team to attack from the off. For the first 60 minutes his France were all over Alexander's Russia, pressing high up the pitch and playing fast, offensive football that was a joy to behold. However, his poor grasp of sports science and tendancy not to listen to his physios, saw his players run out of gas with half an hour left and only a two goal lead. The Russians, accustomed to the intense cold, still had a lot left in their tanks and ended up running out 4-2 winners.
In a decision which shocked the footballing world, Roy was sacked the next morning and blacklisted from all the top leagues in Europe. It was here that Roy's attacking philosphy died. He would never go out to win from the start of a match ever again.
He took the only job that he could get and sank into obscurity managing the semi-professional island nation of St. Helena.
And that is where the record ends. While his exploits across the millennia must be wide-ranging, it appears that most of his troubled past is lost to the annals of time, perhaps to be rediscovered one day by a time-faring space adventurer. Until then, this is all we have of the life, the times, of Royston Vontavius Hodgson XVII
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Jan 6, 2011 16:11
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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quote:
Neither of them will sign - reason, we have Yanks in charge. Thanks so much John and Tom, for making the effort - Not
lol - Not
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Jan 26, 2011 18:52
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Mickolution posted:
Haha, where's that from?
Suarez discussion thread in RAWK's transfer forum
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Jan 26, 2011 19:21
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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if the stories are correct and Torres wants out then the clear villian must be Christian Purslow, of course. Let's open the floor up for comments:
quote:
Cant fuckin believe this will happen..Surely to gently caress Henry n Werner cant let Torres leave,No loving way,,
,,,PURSLOW, YOU FUCKIN LOW LIFE, SOUL DESTROYING ,MEGALOMANIAC
Ahh cheers
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Jan 28, 2011 22:43
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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luvd posted:
lol
didn't some guy on rawk burn his torres shirt? or was it his brother lmao
That was Gerrard, no one is burning any Torres shirts yet
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Jan 28, 2011 22:46
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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quote:
I have a pretty stupid question, how can you fail a medical ? One thing would be drugs, but is there any other
loving idiots
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Jan 30, 2011 23:37
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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lol what
quote:
I am a person who is so depressed in my life that i want to kill myself
But only watching Liverpool game let me feel i belong to this world
And 4th win in a row and beating chelsea at their ground just make me want to live to see how the king going to make liverpool the crown again
Live to see another day... LONGLIVE KING KENNY
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Feb 7, 2011 05:39
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Iggy Pop Barker posted:
don't quote your own posts
you
mother
fuckre
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Feb 7, 2011 06:39
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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There's a thread on RAWK discussing Andy Carroll being back in training, etc. and someone posted some concerns:
quote:I am a bit worried after reading reports that he likes a drink or two and him saying he won't change that.It can hamper his performance and also indicates a slightly bad attitude IMO.Giving up drinking is a minor sacrifice for the lifestyle and wages pros get to enjoy.
I mean a drink once or twice a year(after winning a trophy) is alright in my book but no professional sportsperson should imbibe alcohol regularly if they are "hungry and ambitious".
and this is the completely unironic reply
quote:Never did Gazza any harm - that's the way they breed em up there 8)
amazing
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Feb 14, 2011 14:46
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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ahaha, dude starts a thread about how some teams do the whole pre-match huddle thing, he wants Liverpool to do it, and he wants to share this idea with the players:
quote:I want us to start doing this, like I said it shows a great sign of solidarity and good team spirit within the squad, is there anyway this can be done, like a suggestion made to the team??
I just wish someone would have wound him up with a Liverpool FC Suggestions Line phone number or something
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Feb 16, 2011 18:50
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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ICA posted:
tbf last time Liverpool won something (European Cup!!) they did the huddle.
It's not so much wanting to see the huddle it's that he thinks he can suggest it to the team
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Feb 17, 2011 16:31
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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That guy is really loving stupid
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Feb 27, 2011 17:37
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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quote:
Does anyone else think that when they see Andy Carroll running,he kinda looks like an elegant Centaur
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Mar 29, 2011 20:57
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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If i could put the entire LeBron James thread from RAWK here I would. loving hell.
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Apr 7, 2011 20:10
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Robert Patrick posted:
it's almost like no-one outside of America cares about American sports
It's much worse than that, that is the least eye rolling thing about the thread.
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Apr 7, 2011 20:56
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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I hate all rugby just to be safe also stop talking about it itt, cheers
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Apr 8, 2011 21:41
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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argh get murdered, shut up!!!!
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Apr 10, 2011 00:45
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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quote:
Hi all
I woulds like the views of everyone concerning whether pepe reina will
stay if we fale to get europeopn football
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Apr 13, 2011 06:47
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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quote:this is weird, don't know if it's genuine but i've just noticed the purple aki on twitter @The_Purple_Aki
do you really think its genuine
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Apr 14, 2011 18:34
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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c0burn posted:
WHEN I GO TOUCHING BICEPS TO EARN AN HONEST BOB, SOMETIMES I'M LUCKY AND THEY'LL RUB THEM ON MY NOB. OH IF YOU COULD SEE WHAT I COULD SEE..
lmao
Some of the posters on RAWK, it's amazing
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Apr 14, 2011 19:56
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Some great terrible posts from Manchester United supporters but please put them in quotes, it makes reading them confusing. thanks!
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Apr 19, 2011 13:31
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Remember when we posted bad posts from other football forums in this thread and that's all we posted or I put people on month long probations. Good times.
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May 10, 2011 21:54
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Transatlantic Gulp posted:
How good would a Lucas-Yaya Toure partnership be?
Best signing City have made in a while.
We're getting way off the point of this thread. Did you see the post I quoted where a dude compared Andy Carroll to a centaur? Everyone needs to get back on point in this thread. Also this is not an invitation to discussion, just paste terrible posts as you come across them on various football forums. THANK YOU>
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May 15, 2011 17:09
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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BunnyX posted:
haha stupid foreigners who don't know how to spell things
quote:
Here's a question regarding Transfers - Maybe a decent ITK or "agent" wannabe can answer. What is the full process in a club (any Club) purchasing a player. I'm talking about the Negogiations with Agents and Club, Contract agreements, salary and bonus demands, time scales from start to finish etc. It can't be a simple as finding a player and signing him? Can it??
Just always wondered what actually went on behind closed doors?
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May 17, 2011 19:29
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Iggy Pop Barker posted:
he's right greg. fans from all over the world tune in to watch the larger than life superstars of the WWE.
Hmm let's see what else I have in here...
*reaches into bag marked Absolute Shite*
(this is all in the Pics thread, best for last.)
quote:
Eh, there is 2x colored really tall persons and i assume hes talking about the one with the wide nose that looks tallest = Sama? =P
quote:What on earth is a colored person ?
quote:MTE. They're black, its not offensive to say so,definitely much better than using the awful term "coloured".
quote:Depends where you're from, in some parts of the world 'coloured' is the accepted term whilst 'black isn't really considered correct. I wouldn't be too harsh on him.
quote:I thought coloured was the correct term now? It seems to get changed to much to keep track with though.
Either way, he's still a lad and a decent prospect aswell, no matter what the colour of his skin is.
quote:Like I say, depends on where you're from. Words have different connotations in different environments.
quote:We say can't say either in Sweden, then someone comes and smack the fingers.
We have to say "African background, Asian background" etc..... fml.
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May 20, 2011 19:30
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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quote:
is anyone else worried that if charlie adam is announced as our first signing, it doesn't look like a statement of intent that would make Reina stay, and give our top transfer targets something to think about?
It is REALLY annoying that I can't just reply with "gently caress you" on other forums. Don't they know I'm an admin on SA? Come on, please please please
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May 29, 2011 01:50
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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He basically calls Ashley Young's fiance a friend of the family lover in so many words
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Jun 10, 2011 19:56
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Jova - boswell
Riera - paid 8m, sold ~5m
Leto - paid <2m sold for 5m
Gonzalez - 2m
Zenden - boswell
it is easy to see the problem.... :o
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Jul 14, 2011 14:44
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 29, 2024 07:46
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- The Finn
- Aug 27, 2004
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إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم
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Martin Jol could play himself tbh, Vinnie Jones as Cock Jol
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Jul 30, 2011 04:57
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Nov 26, 2010 05:59
