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Doll House Ghost posted:Quoting myself: Had the ultrasound, everything's ok. Couldn't stop thinking "there's a tiny skull growing inside of me" during the ultrasound, which feels absolutely mad. Nice! I remember when my wife had her ultrasounds it made me feel a bit better about everything. It's weird how much variability there can be in pregnancy checkups. My wife's obstetrician has a first appointment where they do an ultrasound and say "yup you're pregnant, come back in 2 weeks", then do another one on the second visit. So she had one at 7 weeks and one at 9 weeks, which are both pretty early. I've got a copy of them and the 7 weeks one looks hilarious, little dude looks like a gummy bear with a giant elongated head.
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# ¿ Aug 21, 2022 17:03 |
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# ¿ May 5, 2024 16:22 |
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boquiabierta posted:I was a little disappointed in myself for how I coped with the epidural placement -- I know how important it is not to move a muscle, and I couldn't help but jump a little bit at the introduction of the local anesthetic and at some other point. But no harm done. Congratulations! And thanks for the exposition. I just hope my wife (29 weeks pregnant) can do an epidural if she chooses. She has a light case of cerebral palsy and is very easily startled and sometimes twitchy. The obstetricians didn’t seem too concerned about delivery at all, since she mostly just has muscle stiffness in her legs and has an awkward gate. But still I hope the anesthesiologist can work with her condition. Probably they’ve done it on plenty of twitchy women before so I shouldn’t worry too much but still.
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# ¿ Nov 28, 2022 16:30 |
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Yeah my wife had luck with the more frequent snacks and sparkling water. I got her a bunch of lemon spindrift that she liked. The other help for her was moving her prenatal vitamin to the evening rather than the morning. Unfortunately for her it persisted well into her second trimester but it did taper off eventually.
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# ¿ Dec 3, 2022 16:10 |
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My wife's due in Feb. so we're not too far off from you two. For baby monitors, my wife just got a dumb baby monitor (vtech). So no video, just audio and it's a radio signal so no internet snooping. I'm not clear on how secure it actually is if someone parked outside and looked for the signal. They claim it's encrypted but who really knows.
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# ¿ Dec 29, 2022 06:16 |
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I didn't know that about hummus, I guess I shouldn't have made my wife several hummus wraps a couple weeks ago. Although she didn't get sick so no harm done.froglet posted:We told a bunch of our social circle after getting the 12 week scan recently. Most of our friends have no interest in children, so I was fine with a basic "oh, congrats" and the conversation moving on, but I was not not prepared for so many to immediately ask if it was planned. While I get that it's coz people are surprised... Yikes. I don't think anyone asked us if it was planned, but my father in law immediately asked us if we were going to have a second child after this first one.
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# ¿ Jan 2, 2023 18:50 |
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meanolmrcloud posted:The nurses were chatting with us and said one doctor doesnt offer any pain relief, no epidural no nothing and the procedure always fails with them. We go a large hospital and they said they only do 3 or 4 a month, so they seem pretty uncommon, maybe there just isn’t a standardized procedure? My wife recently gave birth and I feel like a lot of stuff isn’t super standardized. Like you’d ask a different doctor or different nurse and you’d get a different answer. For example, nobody agreed on what size nipple shield my wife should use for the pump. One nurse would say “those look too small try the bigger ones”, then the next nurse is like “yo those look too big try the smaller ones”
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# ¿ Feb 3, 2023 01:52 |
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poo poo must be going around or something drat. My wife got pre-eclampsia as well. She had it “without severe symptoms” at first but it developed to severe and the start of HELLP syndrome after like 5 days. When we came to the hospital the 3rd time they were talking about inducing her immediately, but the OB did an ultrasound and it turned out our boy was breech, so straight to emergency c-section! She’s also had post-partum hypertension for like a month too, so she’s drawn a really bad hand with her pregnancy. Wishing the best for you and your kid too! I know it’s tough, but I’m sure you and the kid will do well. Eeyo fucked around with this message at 21:12 on Feb 7, 2023 |
# ¿ Feb 7, 2023 21:07 |
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For us it was "buy more burp cloths". We had a pack of like 8 or something when our dude finally came back from the hospital, and then we were like "wow that was no where near enough". We never used socks and probably 2/3 the clothes we were gifted, since he was born in a cold month. It was just easier to use the all-in-one long clothes since it was cold. In the NICU they taught us to do a swaddle bath. So basically you get your kid naked and swaddle them up in a flannel swaddle, then put them swaddle and all into the bath. Then you just take one limb out at a time to wash. It reduces crying by a lot, so buy a few flannel hospital-style swaddles so you can do it that way. Seconding the mental health issues, I went through those big time. Like all-day 9/10 anxiety and eventually depression for me. I eventually had to go to a part-day program because it was getting to be too much and I couldn't figure out how to cope. Thankfully I was able to get back on my feet and I'm way better at coping with this now, but it can be real. For most parents it's fine. But still, IMO if you don't have a therapist yet (either of you), it may be a good idea to find one beforehand and work on some basic coping strategies ahead of time.
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# ¿ May 4, 2023 15:26 |
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Oh and if you end up bottle feeding, get a cheap pillow + waterproof pillow liner + cheap pillow case. It'll help you position the baby for feeding. Our NICU did inclined side-lying feeding and it's way easier when you have a pillow. Bonus points for a rocking chair.
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# ¿ May 4, 2023 17:44 |
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At our NICU they stuck a pacifier in my boy's mouth almost immediately. I accompanied him to the NICU and then went to see my wife in recovery, I think the next time I was up there he had a paci in. The speech therapist we've been working with for his bottle feeding also seemed to think it was nothing to be concerned about, but that may just be a bottle thing idk.
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# ¿ May 8, 2023 02:21 |
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For boys they make little hats that go on the tip of their penis (or as I like to call them, "piss hats"). They're called pee pee teepees for some goddamn reason. When my boy was newborn they worked ok, maybe caught half of his pee-during-changes. Now that he's a few months older it's not a big deal, he almost never pees during a diaper change now.
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# ¿ May 16, 2023 18:00 |
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It's funny how varied the opinions can be, so of course I have to weigh in too. We use the sleepers with feet 95% of the time, just found them way easier. Easier to undress for diapers, just about right amount of clothing for the temperature, and easier to wash. Bonus points for a zipper on both ends, that makes checking diapers easier. And for bottles, if you end up bottle feeding and using powdered formula then I recommend getting a little 0.1g scale (like one of those drug scales off of amazon) and weighing out the powder. I think we saved easily hundreds of dollars at this point. At least for similac they made the scoops too big so you waste more. Like for our boy he's been between 1 scoop and 2 scoop for a while. But we can mix up any size bottle by just putting in the water and weighing out the powder.
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# ¿ Jun 29, 2023 03:11 |
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With respect to sleep deprivation, I’d recommend starting to work with a therapist before your wife gives birth (if you already haven’t). For me it was pretty rough after my wife gave birth, and it would have been way better if I was working with someone beforehand. The sleep loss is both painful, and puts you in a state where your emotional regulation is way worse. And you know it may be you never need it and you’ll get more sleep than you think!
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# ¿ Jun 29, 2023 17:59 |
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The stroller we have (chicco bravo maybe? Idk) can adjust the handlebars some. My wife’s height discrepancy isn’t as much as yours, we’re 5’9 and 5’1 but she is fine with the stroller at the same height I use so it may not be so bad.
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# ¿ Jun 30, 2023 02:12 |
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Super Librarian posted:We used emery boards on our little guy's nails for the first month or two, because we were way too nervous about clipping them lol Hell I still do that with my 6-month-old. His nails just kinda disintegrate anyway, a couple swipes of the board and they kinda just break off somehow.
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# ¿ Jul 26, 2023 16:11 |
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For bottle washing we got one of the nuby silicone bottle brushes (the nicu told us we should use a silicone one since it's easier to clean out and you can sanitize it), plus a munchkin keyring with several different brush styles. You need the bottle brush to get inside the bottle. We used the Dr. Brown's bottles so you need the keyring brushes to get into the little parts. The munchkin one is nice since we can use the tiny brush to go through the nipple (be careful with very tiny nipples like a preemie flow or something). If you get the Dr. Browns do not shove their little blue brush through the nipple, it's a nipple destroyer. The munchkin one has a very tiny tip so it won't wreck the nipples. IMO you should also get a dedicated tub to fill with soapy water and a drying rack that can be cleaned through the dishwasher. With bottle cleaning, you should either just hand wash the bottles immediately after use, or buy enough bottles that you can run it through the dishwasher with a sanitize setting or through whatever device you choose. If the bottle isn't washed within an hour you'll need to sterilize it, otherwise a routine cleaning is fine (with sterilization every day until they're old enough that it doesn't matter). Cleaning out the Dr. Brown's bottles takes probably twice as long as a regular bottle. All the parts are finnicky and need the detailed cleaning tools. But even then it's not that long, maybe like 5 minutes after a feeding.
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# ¿ Sep 29, 2023 15:27 |
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But yeah playing it by ear at the start is good. My wife intended on breastfeeding, but she never produced much milk at all (seriously like 5ml every pump for weeks, with a hospital-grade pump) so she had to give up and we went full formula. If you do go formula though buy a little 0.1g scale so you can weigh out the formula powder. It will save you tons of money since you don't have to go by the scoops.
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# ¿ Sep 29, 2023 15:44 |
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Hadlock posted:Pre-mix formula and disposable nipples for one baby cost us about $1200 including shipping and tax over a year. drat I think my formula budget would be over twice that and I use dry powder! Maybe I should have bought a palette of the powder or something. If you do want to do that though just wait a bit and make sure your kid does well on whatever formula.
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# ¿ Sep 30, 2023 04:14 |
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And at 3 days old there's no reason to think it'll continue like that. Once your baby gets into a better rhythm (they're born with a hosed up rhythm because in-utero they like to be active when the mom is resting and rest when the mom is moving) it could very easily get better. That and getting back from the hospital into a more calm environment where they can get some good sleep in the dark and don't have lights, beeps, and nurses everywhere. Not that it's guaranteed he won't keep pulling that poo poo in a week's time, but from my memory a lot of bullshit my dude would pull just kinda got better over time. And then some other things might get worse but y'know that's just babies. In the meantime, a few other things to think about: is he being swaddled? Maybe swaddling, rocking, and shushing a bit after diaper change until he calms down a little then try feeding? Have you tried feeding right from sleep? The sucking and swallowing is basically a reflex so he might just go for it a little bit. IDK if that's discouraged or not though. You could try feeding a bit, then change, then finish or some variation like that maybe?
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# ¿ Nov 19, 2023 01:45 |
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Congrats, and I hope the best for you! I know they can be terrifyingly tiny in the nicu. My boy was only 4 weeks premature, and he was very tiny. My wife was born at like 2 lbs and change or something like that. I saw some old photos and she was even tinier.
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# ¿ Dec 25, 2023 15:13 |
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You never know, the lil dude could just decide to flip himself! But also probably not. I remember during my wife's c-section I was watching them pull the guy out and the anesthesiologist was saying "Hey look they're pulling him out by the feet! Usually it doesn't go like that" and I was thinking "Ok yeah great thanks for that, I think I figured that part out already"
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# ¿ Jan 25, 2024 16:53 |
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I was also the non-birthing parent, but I got way, way worse mental health outcomes than my wife. Like I had to go to an intensive outpatient program (several hours of group therapy every weekday) for like a month and change plus medication to be able to manage my mental state healthily. Plus my Mom had to come and help out for most of that time too. take me to the beaver is absolutely right though, it does get better. I'd say I'm better now mentally than I was before the baby arrived. Don't judge yourself at all if you happen to also have lots of emotions and are finding it difficult. We're all human and it's totally ok to feel that way. Like I was also surprised (and ashamed) of how much it hit me, but it's just who I am y'know. Eeyo fucked around with this message at 21:00 on Jan 26, 2024 |
# ¿ Jan 26, 2024 20:56 |
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Is it kicking yet? That was super weird for me to feel as the dad.
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# ¿ Feb 15, 2024 21:51 |
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I gave my wife a card with an outline of my son's hand that I did in pen. And then she showed me up and stamped his hand onto a card with an ink stamp for fathers day.
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# ¿ Apr 23, 2024 01:22 |
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# ¿ May 5, 2024 16:22 |
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You said she'd fall asleep in your arms. Have you tried to get her in the crib before that point? Like get her fed and burped then just lay her down when she's primed. And what's the light like in her room? We've always kept our boy's room as sleep and diaper change only so it's blackout curtains all day. We would feed him in the living room where it's lighter and then the transition to darkness helps him get ready for sleep. And you may not want to hear this but it may just be a phase. At 3 months they're still basically larva and just kinda bumble through the world. She may just need to work through it and get back on a better schedule, then she'll be able to sleep better since she's getting better sleep.
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# ¿ Apr 30, 2024 03:22 |