Still Just a Rat in a Cage - Laboratory Chat!

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Still Just a Rat in a Cage - Laboratory Chat!

Eunabomber: Dec 30, 2002

seacat posted:

If you are completely invisible... My crystal ball tells me your first job will be doing micro in a QC lab for a food/cosmetics/drinks manufacturer. You might get into small/medium pharma if you're lucky (same poo poo, better pay). It also tells me you might even be a chemist in a QC lab because there are apparently too few chemistry majors and too many bio majors; if you get into this boat you will be doing absolutely nothing related to microbiology/molecular biology and you will probably hate your job.

QC lab work for BS or even MS-level scientists is like fast food for teenagers/high school graduates. Nobody wants to do it and nobody is interested in it, it's just where everyone starts out cuz that's where the entry-level jobs are.

If you really are invisible (having no luck), and nepotism has gotten you nowhere, and a new grad, your best bet is to go to a scientific staffing agency (I recommend Scientific Careers or the Lab Support division of On Assignment). They will call you in for an "interview" to talk with the recruiter about possible opportunities. They will give you a background check and drug screen to make sure you don't steal TVs or shoot skag. It's cool to tell them you are a new grad just looking for a place to start out. The recruiter will then try to find you an entry-level job, typically on a temp or temp-to-hire basis with a company in your area. You will be working for the temp agency technically until the company hires you or ges rid of you. For some lovely companies (I'm looking at you, Alcon, Pepsi, Coca-Cola) you will temp for up to 2 years with low pay, no health insurance, and no chance of actually getting hired.

Sounds lovely? Well, it is, although not that bad in this economy. However, the pot of gold at the end of the poo poo rainbow is that even just a year of professional QC lab work will qualify you for the better, more interesting positions like the ones you imagined while your university fed you bullshit about what a special snowflake you are. QC work is tedious, repetitive, and can drive you insane depending on the company. Stick it out. If you can prove that you can stick it out for a couple of years your options will open since you are now an experienced scientist, not a worthless new grad.

As someone who was in this position after finishing my BS, let me reiterate how valuable and important connections/"nepotism" can be to get your foot in the door of a non-QC lab. Network like crazy every opportunity you have.

# ¿ May 9, 2011 20:49

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# ¿ May 3, 2024 01:47

Eunabomber: Dec 30, 2002

Sundae posted:

Oh man... I've got a great one. Holy poo poo, the fun never stops here.

In a PM to polyfractal, I talked a bit about how my company loves to develop software in-house for "security" reasons. Of course, this backfires an awful lot because we aren't exactly software developers, but we're also not exactly known for thinking things through either. There is one piece of software which we DID contract from someone else. Our electronic lab notebooks are through a very major server / database company.

We're supposed to have support for unlimited lab notebook IDs, and they all had to be able to support up to a certain number (let's call it 10,000) experiments before it called a notebook "full" and assigned the scientist a new notebook. So, you might have notebook 102530-9024, meaning experiment 9024 in notebook 102530. Makes sense, right? This way, we could scale to the millions and millions of experiments that will end up in here over the next decade or so before something better comes along / makes its way through our bureaucracy.

There's a bug. The max experiment count (10K) was assigned as the global maximum experimental count. After the 10,000th experiment was added to the system, the entire thing seized up and refused to accept any more entries. Nobody in the entire company can document experiments in the electronic system until the company fixes their code.

Those old paper notebooks we just had confiscated to make sure we complied with the new electronic system would be really helpful right around now. I've got a lot of napkin scribbles to transcribe.

Where do you work, Veridian Dynamics?

# ¿ May 27, 2011 00:10

Eunabomber: Dec 30, 2002

Sundae posted:

This is one area where the big pharma companies actually are kinda awesome. We pay our interns anywhere from $17 to $25 an hour right now (even more if you're working on your PhD -- my last PhD-track intern got $37 an hour), and we seem to have plenty of them even now that we're imploding. More interns than regular workers, sometimes. I highly recommend, if you have any interest in pharmaceuticals at all, applying for internships at the big guys. Just don't apply there for real work later.

How does anyone in a PhD program have time for an internship?

Sundae posted:

Not quite. PFE. The concept is the same, though.

Oh, you poor bastard. http://pipeline.corante.com/archives/2011/05/26/pfizers_brave_new_medchem_world.php

# ¿ May 27, 2011 21:14

Eunabomber: Dec 30, 2002

Appachai posted:

Hey thread, I'm a postdoc at a big pharma company. My project is crystallizing membrane proteins. You didn't think this thread was going to get less depressing, did you?

High five, fellow membrane protein attempted crystallographer!

# ¿ Jul 18, 2011 03:24

Eunabomber: Dec 30, 2002

Appachai posted:

Hey, want to go tp ray stevens' house later?

Pfft, GPCR'S? Transporters/ion channels are where it' at yo.

# ¿ Jul 18, 2011 05:51

Eunabomber: Dec 30, 2002

Appachai posted:

I think ion channels are the coolest, but since this is bfc I'll just say that GPCRs are considered a lot more important by pharma

I know:( Guess what I have the least amount of experience with...

A little shop talk, have you tried any Cell Free expression systems? It appears from the literature that people have had more success using CF systems to express GPCR's now. Not in mg quantities, but still pretty promising.

# ¿ Jul 18, 2011 18:57

Eunabomber: Dec 30, 2002

Solkanar512 posted:

Holy poo poo.

Time to shut this fucker down if you ask me. Who would I go to outside of the local papers?

Short answer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrTsuvykUZk

Seriously, report these people immediately. Hell, PM me this labs info and I can ask my institutions IACUC how to contact the proper authorities/who best to squeal to.

Allowing something like this to go on makes legitimate use of animals in a laboratory setting look bad, and additionally sounds awful for the animals involved.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2011 07:51

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# ¿ May 3, 2024 01:47

Eunabomber: Dec 30, 2002

That Works posted:

Nothing like getting into lab at 6am on a holiday to find out your coworkers used up the last of your Gibson mastermixes and cashed out the enzymes for them so you can't make any more until your institute opens for ordering next week. The frantic emails from your PI asking if the clones made for the grant submission are done yet don't help any either. Hooray for lab mates.

Happy New Year everyone!

Wait, are you purifying your own enzymes for Gibson assembly? (If so, protocol link...)

# ¿ Jan 4, 2015 18:49

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