Grand Theft Auto Megathread

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Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

I can't wait to find out what criminal stereotype the main character of GTA5 will be.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2011 20:29

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 05:44

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

I just want them to remake GTA2. Lightning guns and soylent hotdogs and the globe-spanning Zaibatsu, as well as the coolest loving mission in any GTA game. Commit crimes to get taken to federal prison island to steal a car to help a high up in the Redneck gang escape by ramping yourself from an island onto the mainland only to have a high speed car chase through a trailer park.

God GTA2 was a good game.

e: I'm pretty sure I've posted this exact post in the leadup threads for both GTA4 and San Andreas :negative:

# ¿ Apr 7, 2011 20:03

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Rookersh posted:

I'd love to see a GTA Twin Cities.

You're drat right it'll never happen. Nobody anywhere gives a poo poo about anything that happens in Minnesota, not even most people in Minnesota. A girl I used to work with was from Minneapolis; she called the state "the great frozen beige."

Why would you want to inflict Minnesota on anyone? Why do you hate everyone?

# ¿ Apr 8, 2011 12:03

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

kri kri posted:

They really should do Hong Kong or Tokyo, but it will probably be Miami or LA again

Tokyo would work in the same way that London 1969 worked; there's honestly not that many iconic cities in the world that you could parody and still have it be obvious where you're parodying. Like how Vice City was obviously Miami, San Andreas was obviously LA, GTA4 was obviously New York. People who have never been to these places can tell what they're based on from pop culture. Honestly, the only other "iconic" places I can think of that they haven't done are Tokyo and a generic "Europe" which would have a Sicilian/Grecian coastal town, a Venice knockoff, a bunch of weed cafes, an Eiffel Tower parody and a whole lot of assholes who think they're better than you because over half their pay gets taken in taxes.

# ¿ Apr 8, 2011 15:21

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Latis posted:

You can't make fun of America well in those cities.

Europe's been making fun of America just fine for a long while now. Besides, National Lampoon's European Vacation made pretty good fun of America despite being entirely not set in America. I'd rather it get set in a parody of

Himuro posted:

What about Washington DC?

but it's not like it would be impossible to set it in Europe.

DC would be pretty cool, so long as you accurately depicted how loving confusing the Metro system is the first time you use it. Also all the political monuments and locations would be fantastic to steal a motorbike and ride it over. If they set one in DC I would really want an accurate depiction of Dupont Circle because I'm awesome with learning roads and streets and when I was there a couple years ago it was so confusing. Triangle-shaped city blocks mess with my head.

# ¿ Apr 8, 2011 15:33

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

KFCB posted:

Really? Of all the subway systems I have used, the DC Metro has been by far the easiest to understand. Is it that they charge your fare based on distance traveled that you think is confusing for first timers?

It was my first subway and the sheer number of bridges and platforms facing all different directions, combined with having to pre-purchase tickets for distances that I had no idea I'd be travelling sent me into sensory overload :ohdear:

I even came from a city that had totally bangin' public transport!

# ¿ Apr 8, 2011 16:22

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Car Stranger posted:

Funnily enough, this is one of the reasons why (educated) Europeans make fun of (uneducated) Americans.

But yeah thanks for displaying your amazing ignorance of the rest of the world. I think a GTA set outside of America would be pretty fun so long as it didn't degenerate into taking advantage of stereotypes (which it couldn't, because an entire game with humour based on that would be boring as hell).

I'm not an American~

Also every GTA game takes every opportunity it can to take advantage of stereotypes and expand upon them what are you talking about

# ¿ Apr 9, 2011 02:10

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

GyverMac posted:

Its not GTA, but its close enough: True Crime: Streets of LA, is it any good? I saw it in a bargain bin for the PC (i think) the other day. But is it worth my time? The reviews i've seen are really mixed. Any goons played this?

The first time you get into a big cinematic gunfight you'll think "actually this game RULES." Then everything will come crashing down around you and you'll wonder how the hell people actually managed to finish the game.

# ¿ Apr 10, 2011 20:46

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Cojawfee posted:

The challenges only worked because its in a setting where you can go out to the middle of nowhere and hunt animals. If GTAV has challenges, they need to fit into the setting, not just "kill seven million pigeons." The worst part is that you HAVE to use a map guide to find all the pigeons. You can complete every challenge in RDR just by using the resources in the game.

There's a static in-game map of all the pigeons on the in-game internet. It's literally the worst design choice in the entire game series.

# ¿ Apr 13, 2011 02:53

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Doctor Butts posted:

What? No. The controls suck just as much. Try getting into a melee situation with a bunch of zombies in RDR and you'll see its still poo poo.

Try walking or getting into a fistfight with anything and you'll see it's still poo poo.

# ¿ Apr 13, 2011 15:51

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

I don't want the game to have anything to do with loving San Andreas. I want them to pick an American region they haven't done yet and build a spiritual homage to GTA2 in that region. I don't want that region to be goddamn Texas.

# ¿ Apr 15, 2011 11:54

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

blue squares posted:

I think Washington DC would definitely provide the best opportunity for social commentary. Some of GTA's best and funniest characters have been dirty politicians. In this game, most of your bosses could be politicians, lobbyists, big-wigs from the pentagon, and the CIA. Plus, Rockstar would be almost obligated to include a mission in which you assault the White House on behalf of the VP or the Speaker of the House or something. The Fox News coverage of it would be amazing.

I want a game like GTA set in a fake Washington, where the last mission finishes with your character becoming President. Also you still get to go on car stealing bitch ramping pedestrian slaughtering mayhem.

# ¿ Apr 15, 2011 13:08

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Doctor Butts posted:

It's just not as cool or relevant to do modern pop-culture references, because we don't know if its just a 'in the moment' thing, or something that's gonna stick with a generation.

It's awesome though to set things in the near future and troll people by having pop idol and nobel peace prize winner Rebecca White finally bring the music industry into a new generation with her song Saturday.

# ¿ Apr 15, 2011 15:06

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Well yeah, that's all well and good but here's my counter argument to that kind of future I hope you'll find it compelling as heck

# ¿ Apr 15, 2011 16:22

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

All in all I don't give a poo poo where or when it's set, I just like to talk about GTA2 whenever I can.

What I blindly hope is that Rockstar have taken serious lessons from both Red Dead Redemption and Saints Row 2 and combine all the things that are excellent about each into one game.

# ¿ Apr 15, 2011 16:51

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Zigmidge posted:

*Or whatever pure cheese works for you. Most people do themselves a sad disservice by putting in their regular playlists. I have a feeling these same people argued with me about GTA 4's driving

Millionaires is the best band for inciting pure GTA-style rage.

Millionaires is the best band for inciting pure GTA-style rage.

# ¿ Apr 17, 2011 00:10

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

IM_DA_DECIDER posted:

I can't get over how poo poo the GTAIV music selection is, especially after the absolute brilliance of SA.

Are you kidding me. It's the only game I've ever played with a decent selection of good hardcore, the hipster station kicked rear end, the russian station was incredible and the other stations were just really really great. It's the only GTA game I've played where I haven't gotten sick of the music at any point playing the game.

The only other open world game I've played with a really good diverse soundtrack was Saint's Row 2.

# ¿ Apr 24, 2011 18:56

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

The Lost And The Damned ruined Liberty City Hardcore in my opinion. Pre-LATD, you'd hear Cro-Mags and Bad Brains and Murphy's Law and post-LATD all I heard was loving Cannibal Corpse and Sepultura and ugh, Bathory :mad:

Radio Broker, on the other hand, got turned from "pretty loving awesome radical" to "i never change the station." Hearing Magic Dirt start playing made this huge loving grin break out on my face and Japanther were my favorite band at the time of the DLC's release.

Dammit, I want to go and get GTA4 again now :mad:

# ¿ Apr 25, 2011 02:28

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

precision posted:

That's realistic. People, in general, and especially in NYC, are loving rear end in a top hat drivers.

edit: It would be even better if this happens when a cabbie is behind you and he leans out and yells "COME ON! YOU COULD HAVE MADE THAT!"

I don't know why GTA4 didn't have bicycle couriers everywhere.

# ¿ Apr 25, 2011 19:54

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Himuro posted:

Things I want GTA5 to take from Saints Row 1/2:

- Cruise control
- The garage. You can you save any vehicle in your garage for later use and add to your growing collection. Garages are universal, so no matter what hideout, so long as your car is saved you can use it. If your car is destroyed you can pay a fee to get it back.

- Planes

- Gang stars, rival gangs get stars as well as police. Piss off a gang too much and you'll go on all out gang war mode.
- Hostages. Get in a car with someone in the passenger seat? Take them for hostage and start a side mission! How long can you outrun the police?
- Co-op.
- Cancel mission mid-mission.
- drug wars (basically stolen straight out of Chinatown Wars)

- Customize yourself: your personality, your movements, your walk, everything about yourself.
- The ability to buy vehicles.

- Fail a mission? Display a result screen that shows how much you suck and opt to return to checkpoint, beginning of mission, or cancel the mission. ONLY allow BUSTED and WASTED when not on a mission.
- Cell phone with actual use. Still have the ability to call friends but make it for useful calls only. Like, sending me a ride when I'm in the middle of nowhere.

I want all these things to be in GTA5. I am glad the Saint's Row franchise doesn't suck and I'm glad there is a noticable difference between the two games, but all of these things are reasonable in a GTA game without it starting to go Saint's Row/early GTA levels of wacky.

# ¿ Apr 26, 2011 18:25

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

You know what would be more awesome than horses in a GTA game? Not having horses in a GTA game. Including horses means there's going to be at least one horse chase mission in the storyline and I don't know, that just strikes me as being silly.

Also, I would feel really squeamish accidentally killing a horse in a modern day setting. RDR had animals that you could kill without feeling awkward because it was set in a location and a time period where animals run free and wild across the land. In GTA, no animals would exist that aren't someone's pet. I don't like the idea of killing someone's pet, even if it's in a videogame. Nobody should like the idea of killing someone's pet.

# ¿ Apr 29, 2011 13:49

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Test Pilot Monkey posted:

Like you never kicked the dogs in Bully.

I didn't even know you could. Nobody should ever kick a dog

# ¿ Apr 29, 2011 14:23

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

Timeless Appeal posted:

I wouldn't mind having birds. It would've added something to have some pigeons fly out of your way during a car chase.

Yeah but birds aren't animals, they're just flying rear end in a top hat jerks.

# ¿ Apr 30, 2011 13:29

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

I just realized why I wasn't as much of a fan of GTA4 or SA's story; the protagonists aren't active in their plot. In Vice City, Tommy Vercetti is open about wanting to run the city and all his actions are taken to move him closer to that goal. In GTA3, Claude Speed was working towards his goal of getting revenge on Catalina. In GTA2, Claude was I don't know, trying to steal all the things. In San Andreas, things just kept happening to CJ. In GTA4, things just kept happening to Nico.

SA is more at fault than GTA4; at least in 4, Nico planned on getting revenge, even though it was basically only mentioned as a reminder to tie the various plots together. In SA, CJ just showed up and a half dozen people instantly started telling him that he's got some chores to do before he can sit down and watch the TV.

I want the protagonist of GTA5 to have a clear goal or at the very least not act like they're being led around by the loving nose all the time.

# ¿ May 4, 2011 16:55

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

That's why I think Saint's Row 2 has a better plot than any recent Rockstar game; sure, there were people who wanted your help, but they were largely ambient activities. The main plot had the player being active and going out of their way to make poo poo happen. I liked that.

RDR had a terrible case of folks needing poo poo out of John Marston. Every single person you had to do half a dozen favors for before they'd just say "yeah I'll help you at an indeterminate point in the future" and at least half the time, you didn't even need to do anything in those favors except show up and not get shot. I played through seeing how many missions you could let other AI characters complete for you. If you're patient, a lot.

# ¿ May 4, 2011 17:11

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

DrVenkman posted:

It's reasons like this that I wish I had a PC.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BSNDGLNqe3U

It's San Andreas recreated in GTA IV...and it looks really good.

I want to have the time to do this with GTA2's cities :allears:

# ¿ Jun 20, 2011 17:05

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 05:44

Wungus: Mar 5, 2004

machinegunmessiah posted:

Although he mentions in one mission that he was fighting against Bosnians, so, Serbian it is, I guess. Nevermind...

In the GTA universe, the US and Australia were in a war against each other. Serbia might not even exist.

# ¿ Jul 20, 2012 22:52

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