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Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



You can't find Rittenhouse Bonded anywhere right now. I've checked my two local specialty liquor stores several times in the last couple months and they're always out. Supply hasn't caught up with the huge spike in demand around 2005/2006, since unless I'm mistaken their bonded rye spends 6 years in barrels. Everybody keeps saying "Oh we should get some in the next couple weeks" and that is never true.

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Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Klauser posted:

As far as glassware goes, I would rank them like this:

Coupe
Highball/Chimney
Rocks
Cocktail/Martini

You should know what volumes you're looking for when you buy glasses. Coupe and cocktail glasses should be between 4 and 5 ounces, rocks glasses are usually 4.5, double rocks are often as much as 12. A highball or Collins glass is around 10 ounces, a fizz or sours glass will be between 6 and 8. A zombie/cooler glass will be 16 ounces.

My current glassware collection includes two cocktail glasses, two one coupe glass, two rocks glasses, two double rocks, two red wine glasses, four liqueur/dessert wine glasses, four sours glasses, and four zombie glasses. I find myself using the coupes the most, followed by the cocktail glasses, then the double rocks. I mostly use the zombie glasses for big single-serving punches, and the single rocks glasses for neat spirits. I only use cocktail glasses when I'm making something that simply cannot be served in any other style of glass (Manhattan/Martini/Martinez) or because I'm already using my coupes. I hate cocktail glasses.

Goddamn it's hard to find good coupe glasses. The Daiso store in San Francisco's Japantown had wonderful coupe glasses like 9 months ago and I bought two. They were just the right size, like 4.5 ounces, and had elegant lines. I went back a couple weeks ago and all they had were some lovely ugly glasses, which is all the more devastating since I broke one of the ones I had bought earlier. You can find really nice stuff by like Reidel or Spiegelau, but if I had $100 I'd spend it on liquor, rather than glassware. Also most glasses are over-sized for cocktail use.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



BevMo has been carrying St. Elizabeth pimento dram, so you can totally find it out there. OR you could infuse your own!

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



That is an insane looking cocktail. It's also almost hilariously trendy. Cool to see a cocktail mixed with an aggressive Islay malt though.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Above like 22% ABV it won't go bad, per se, but the flavor can go kaput. If it hasn't been open there should be any problem though.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Uh, that's not cocaine you were tasting. That's just sugar.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Dirnok posted:

So, I wanted to ask before posting and being laughed out of the thread.

I work in a typical college bar. My access to good ingredients is very limited. My customers are not the type that appreciate the finer cocktails like this thread offers. But I'm often asked to "Make something good, for a girl!" and I do what I can with what I have. As an example:


1/2 oz. Red Maui
1/4 oz. Peach Schnapps
1/4 oz. Southern Comfort
1/4 oz. Amaretto

Fill with cranberry juice, splash of grenadine.


Are these types of drinks something that you guys feel belong in this thread?

I mean it's not the sort of thing I would drink myself, but feel free to post it since tastes vary. Fielding requests for "A drink for a girl where you can't taste the alcohol. Something sweet!" is the bane of my existence when wielding the shaker for parties. I typically resort to long drinks like G&Ts, Cuba Libres, and Dark and Stormies, since they're pretty palatable without being over-the-top sugar bombs.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



What kind of rum?

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



What? No. Lillet is an easily available quinquina that any specialty liquor store should carry, or failing that a decent wine merchant.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



The Last Word goes in and out of being my favorite cocktail. I think right now it's out, but that doesn't mean I'm any less keen to drink one if it should present itself.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



^^ :( ^^

I like turtles posted:

So for my Halloween punch I'm gonna do white rum, midori, blue curacao, possibly some amaretto, and soda of some sort, either soda water or sprite or something. Maybe get some sort of juice in there.
v:shobon:v It should be pretty and not taste too bad... I'm just concerned about going over-sweet.

Nooooo there are so many horribly clashing flavors in there. The only things to recommend it will be the sugar and the drunk. Punch isn't just a random assortment of booze that happens to be served in a bowl. Punch should be light enough to be quaffable (somewhere between 10% and 16% ABV), sweet enough to be appetizing, sour enough to be refreshing, and strong enough to be fun. The most basic stripped-down punch recipe will contain sugar, water, booze, and lemon juice.

Here, make this instead:

2 bottles VS cognac (i.e. from France)
18 oz. oloroso sherry
2 1/3 cups sugar (some sort of raw/unrefined sugar is best)
18 oz. lemon juice
4 oz. lime juice
1 1/2 qt. + 1 cup water

Dissolve the sugar in the cup of water, which should be boiling. A better way might be to make a syrup of it on the stove and then let it cool. In any case, to your sugar/water mixture, add the brandy, the sherry, and the citrus juice. Stir well, then at the moment of service pour in the water. Pour slowly and taste – you don't want it to get too dilute, but you should probably end up using all of it. Slip in a block of ice and grate fresh (fresh!) nutmeg over the top.

You can prepare a block of ice by filling a 1 or 1 1/2 qt. metal or plastic bowl with water and letting it freeze overnight. Run hot water over the bottom of the bowl to remove the block.

This is called Admiral Russel's Punch, and is, for my money, one of the most perfectly balanced punches I've made/tasted (and in the last year I've made 15-20 different punches, for a total volume of more than 100 gallons). This really hits its stride after it's been on ice for about 20 minutes.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Vegetable Melange posted:

Kenning, you're right in that there is a rich vein of punches going back hundreds of years that are deliciously balanced, but brother, recommending a cognac and sherry punch to someone who suggested blue curacao is a bit wide of the mark. Walk before you run and all.

Captain Stinkybutt posted:

You can frown all you want but that punch bowl got drained, son. Drunk people aren't going to notice the nuances of your Classy Punch.

I've served this punch to a party full of girls who ask me for cocktails "that are sweet where you can't taste the alcohol." People have taste, man, everybody has taste.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



DasNeonLicht posted:

Though I read they drink brandy old fashioneds in the Midwest...? :psyduck:

A brandy old fashioned is a delightful thing. If you make it with a VSOP cognac it's incomparably smooth. And if you add in a little dollop of Cointreau or Gran Marnier, stir, serve up in a glass with a lemon peel-rubbed rim, and finish it with a snap of champagne you have a Chicago cocktail, which is one of the most dangerous potations I've ever tasted.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Evan Williams is definitely bourbon. Jack Daniels is Tennessee whiskey, which is distinguished primarily for its charcoal filtration.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



You'd be better off buying some Famous Grouse, infusing it with some poo poo, and sweetening it with honey. I did not care for the sample bottle I bought of American Honey (I wanted to see if that + bourbon would make a decent Rusty Nail analog that I could call a Golden Spike).

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Gautier is a relatively inexpensive VSOP cognac. I prefer Martell, but the place where I used to buy it raised the price from $27.99 to $38.99 in six months. Blows.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Applejack has a spicier, more assertive taste compared the more polished and mellow taste of Calvados. Ted Haigh says that you can always go Calvados -> applejack, and just have a slightly more feisty drink, but applejack -> Calvados can sometimes yield a drink that lacks fire. In the case of the drink Klauser posted I think Calvados would work fine, since the rye is going to give it plenty of spice.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Trinidad Sours are off the hook. They are hella awesome.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



I have that tray and those cubes are loving boss. They're also good for frothing the living gently caress out of a Ramos Gin Fizz.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



I've done Aviations at 2 : .75 : 1 with Luxardo and they are awesome, but I'm a maraschino fiend.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



betamax posted:

Actually, just tried the aviation with the same ratios and beefeater and enjoyed it a lot more (had used tanq 10 and sapphire before). Just curious, what is your gin of preference for this cocktail?

Tanq 10 and Bombay Sapphire are pussy gins, frankly. They were designed with non-gin drinkers in mind, so they mute the juniper and use more delicate botanicals which can be nice on the rocks I guess but which get muscled out by strong flavors like maraschino (god I love maraschino). I'm not a Tanqueray fan in general, honestly, but Bombay Original has good, robust flavor and excellent price mark that makes it my workhorse gin. Beefeater is totally workable, a bit more citrusy than Bombay. I also like Boodles, again for a citrusy gin, and Broker's, which is more similar to Bombay. Citadelle is also a good one, but not one of my standards. Finally, if you wanna make some excellent martinis, Anchor Junipero has a lush juniper flavor that is off the hook.

I like gin a lot.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



bunnielab posted:

Bombay London Dry.

:hfive:

Bombay really rocks. Actually, a Bombay rocks with an olive – almond stuffed – and the tiniest (like a single drop or two) of brine is incredibly refreshing and tasty. Highly recommended.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Wompa164 posted:

How do you like the Ransom? I'm kind of regretting not grabbing it but I can't justify having 4 different gins right now.

Also, I just picked up a bottle of Neisson Rhum Agricole and holy poo poo, holy poo poo. This r(h)um will make anyone rethink rum.

If you want to rethink rum you need to get your hands on some Smith and Cross. If I could only drink one spirit for the rest of my life, that would be it.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Yeah, it's a beast neat but with a little turbinado or demerara syrup, a dash or two of Angostura, and some ice it goes down niiiiiice and smooth. My roommate described that drink like, "You take a sip and then kerbloooooooshkhss...flavor explosion."

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



First of all, the glass is probably too big. It shouldn't be any more than 4.5 ounces (as I mentioned earlier in this thread). Secondly, it shouldn't be made with vodka. Third, the vermouth should be fresh. Fourth, it should actually be stirred with ice, rather than just lazily sloshed in the mixing glass. Fifth, there is such a thing as too dry – if your gin : vermouth ratio is exceeding 6 : 1 you should just call a spade a spade and say you're drinking gin up. Finally, a couple dashes of orange bitters and a lemon twist makes it all sing.

The reason that no one actually likes Martinis is that few places actually serve martinis. They serve vaguely cool gin/vodka faintly tainted with sour vermouth. And that's terrible.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



It's easier to chill glasses by just sticking them in the freezer.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Anchor's Genevieve is really good.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



TapTheForwardAssist posted:



Oh yeah, a nice Rack punch is damned tasty. You ought to pick up Wondrich's Punch! if you want some excellent ideas for your arrack. Also you should make some Swedish Punsch with it.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



It's got that funk. That deep, intoxicating, somewhat sulfurous twang is not for everyone.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Dude those are everywhere. BevMo has them, Bed, Bath, and Beyond has them, Amazon has them. It makes a big difference too. The amount of juice compared to one of those terrible countertop reamers is not even comparable.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Ethanol is, largely, ethanol. Oh some spirits have more congeners and fusel oils than others, and some claim that those cause a stronger hangover but if it's true it's a minor difference. You get hangovers when you drink too much, period. There's a lot of myth and bullshit about liquor, which is fine for shooting the poo poo, but useless if you're trying to really get to know your spirits.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



If it were me I'd just toss out the idea of cocktails and have a punch party. I know I talk about it a lot, but Wondrich's Punch! basically changed my life. A big vat of Limmer's Club or Admiral Russel's or USS Richmond punch is amazing for a party. I can provide recipes for my favorite punches if you want. BUT if you're sure you want to run this party on cocktails, keep in mind that Sidecars, like other sours, are meant to be shaken. The aeration gives the drink a lightness which is much to its advantage. Also stuff is gonna settle out of the lemon juice if you just leave it sitting. You can shake it up a little though, should be fine.

In terms of brandy for your Sidecars, a VS cognac from any of the major houses will be fine. I wouldn't recommend most Californian brandies, since while a few are very good they're damned hard to find. Stuff like Raynal could work in a pinch, depending on your budget, but the couple times I've used Raynal for punches it felt pretty flat.

For real though, consider punch. Punch parties are always great.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Yeah I would def. come to that party.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



The shaking is to introduce air into the sour before drinking. It'll stay in there for a few minutes, but not for the whole party. Maybe give them a little seal-able container to shake their sidecar in before they pour it?

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Oh I got your back. Although the fifth ingredient is generally held to be "spice," not tea. Tea takes the place of water, when used.

I know I've been talking a lot of punch in this thread lately, but I seriously cannot recommend Wondrich's Punch! enough. I am saying this with total honesty and no exaggeration: it changed my life.

Okay so I haven't made United Service Punch before myself, but I have made many dozens of gallons of punch in the last year and I reckon I can read a punch fairly well on the page.

The recipe as written as as follows:

2.5 cups Batavia
12 ounces raw sugar
5 cups black tea (made with 5 tsp loose tea or 5 bags)
the peels of 4 lemons
the juice of 8
optional fresh nutmeg

Muddle the lemon peels with the sugar in a large-ish bowl and allow to sit for a half hour to an hour. Muddle again to recombine everything once a bunch of oil has come out. Make up the tea, strain, and allow to cool completely. Add all liquid ingredients (strain your lemon juice!) Stir to combine, and fish out your peels with a slotted spoon or somesuch. Serve on a big block of ice.

The yield as written is a little over 18 standard drinks (i.e. 0.6 ounces ethanol per drink), somewhere around 2.5-3 quarts of liquid, and is between 15% and 16% ABV. Depending on how grown-up your coworkers' palates are, some might find it a little dry, though it looks well-balanced to me.

The main problem I see is that that leaves you with about half a cup of batavia left over, which seems a shame. If it were me, I'd pitch in the whole bottle, measure the lemon juice in ounces rather than lemons (and use about 14 ounces perhaps), add one more cup of tea, and use a pound of sugar, leaving you with the following recipe:

1 bottle batavia
16 ounces raw sugar
6 cups black tea
14 ounces strained lemon juice
the peel of 4 or 5 lemons
optional fresh nutmeg

Remember, if you're not grating your nutmeg fresh it's better to just omit. Also, if you're going to be constructing this punch immediately before service (like, at the party) it's wise to bring along a little bottle of sugar syrup and a bit of extra lemon juice so you can adjust it right in the bowl if needs be.

Happy punching.

Kenning fucked around with this message at 20:56 on Dec 5, 2011

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Glad you like it! As to your questions, you can indeed use jaggery, but for most of my punches I just use demerara/turbinado. With jaggery you really need to render it into a syrup beforehand, and you can't do the whole bit about muddling the peels for the oil as easily. Jaggery and other super unrefined evaporated cane juice sugars will add a funky earthiness that is not unwelcome, and there are certain punches which drat near require it. This one could go either way.

As for the citrus, strictly speaking lime is a more traditional choice for 'rack punches. This one calls for lemon because in 19th century England, when it was developed, limes were considered unwholesome. I haven't yet made a punch soured with grapefruit, so I can't give much guidance there. I imagine you'd have to take care that it didn't get too pithy-tasting, which can be a problem with grapefruit, since then it would be bitter. Also I feel like grapefruit might work better with brandy or Jamaican rum.

Finally, I am not a tea buff, so I typically just use some Assam or Ceylon loose-leaf from my local grocery. It might be fun to do something fancy with some of the tea, but I would do like you said and use just a bit. You want your punch to be integrated in flavor, and not have the tea stand out too much.

Best of luck! And really, don't worry too much about your punch. Just taste as you go along and it's pretty unlikely it'll come out bad.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Not easy at all.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Infuse your own spirits.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



You typically don't start your infusion and your cocktail at the same time.

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Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Cool, that sounds pretty good over all. I typically just grate the nutmeg directly on at the party and let people just drink it, since it mostly settles to the bottom of the bowl anyway. Sounds like you've got a good sense for balancing this sort of thing up. The instructions meant 8 oz. per cup, but what you did should be fine.

Hope it's well-received!

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