- WINNERSH TRIANGLE
- Aug 17, 2011
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President Unerlion posted:
So here's my next story from my 3.5 group. It's short but funny, maybe in a "you had to be there" way but. Just bare with me.
So we had just been cornered by a pair of Dire Wolves and their Orc handler. Who was carrying a giant club. Which was actually just a tree. I was trying to climb up the chimney, leaving my partners to face the fight without me.
So everyone is getting their poo poo ready, and we're just waiting on the DM to start the encounter. Finally he has the Orc speak
 Hey, you guys took care of those snakes. Thanks.
Everyone: 
Well, lets go back to the nice part of the castle, there's probably more around over here.
So turns out that we just happened to (well not really) find a 2000 year old Orc Wizard. He's not interested in fighting, and was just checking out what the commotion was in his house.
So we're talking to the Orc about the artifact we were given, the Vorpal blade that the Merchant was making, various world building things, when the pirate decides to ask if the Orc had any weed, because his character is a stoner.
Well, DM rolls some dice and has the Orc grab "a dusty old leather sack" and toss it to the pirate. Turns out to be some of the Orc's father's stash.
DM: Roll a constitution check
Pirate: 18
Dm: Nope, you take one huff and start tilting backwards, hitting the ground with a nice dull thud and releasing a cloud of smoke as you hit.
The funny bit was what happened right as our DM said that. See Davy, the pirate, skypes in to our group and we have him on a big screen with a web cam so we can see him. Right as our DM said he had passed out from the weed Davy's webcam and skype decided to poo poo themselves.
Pirate: Oh well that SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKVBVBVBVBVBVBBVBVBVVBVBVBVBVVBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz
So our now passed out pirate is up on a big 40" HDTV turning into a human Skrillex performance as the video feed starts to de-interlace and slowly split appart, finally just cutting to a weird rainbowy static a minute later.
We pretty much called it for the night there since 1) we couldn't stop laughing for a good 10 minutes and 2) Our pirate couldn't really play anymore. Also our DM wanted to make sure it wasn't his computer that hosed up.
'Hey hero,' the Orc Wizard says. 'Wanna try some Snow Crash?'
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Feb 22, 2012 10:58
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- WINNERSH TRIANGLE
- Aug 17, 2011
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Randalor posted:
As we are allowed to post second-hand stories, I can tell about the second game session that was banned from being mentioned at the club. Now, the reason why the previous story and the following one were banned wasn't because of what happened in them, but that because whenever they were mentioned,  would start arguing about alignments and how children are always lawful good angel who have done no wrong and would end up giving everyone who didn't agree with him 100% a headache. I have not actually played in the following session, but I verified it with 5 of the people involved, and clarified a few of the points with one of the players again tonite.
Always doesn't mean Always!
The group in question was 6 players, of varying alignments. They had been travelling when they found a black dragon and its lair in the wilderness, near some villages. As this would be a problem for the villages at some point, they attacked and killed the dragon. After a short fight, they kill the dragon and enter the lair for the dragon's loot, where they find, in amongst the treasure, three newly-hatched black dragons, hatched literally that day. 4 of the party members agreed that the dragons had to die, as they were evil. One disagreed, as his character had dragonblood, and a dragon familiar, and was sympathetic to them. , on the other hand, disagreed for all the wrong reasons.
: They were just born! They hadn't done anything evil yet and shouldn't die!
 : But... they're black dragons. They're always evil. Always. Okay, going OOC for a minute here, but in the monster manual, it even says "ALWAYS evil". Always, 100% of the time. The only thing the monster manual says about how they act is that they're evil assholes.
: But, the drow are always evil, and look at Drizzt! He's lawful good! If I could, I would wish the dragons good!
This went on for several minutes, until finally the GM said "Okay, fine, there's a ring of three wishes in the loot"
: I wish the three black dragons are good! That's only one wish, right?
 : Yeah, sure, fine. Whatever.
: So you're now fully evil, right? I mean, that's what forcibly changing someone's alignment is.
: No, I did it in the name of good! It can't be an evil act if I did it in the name of good!
: I understand your logic, mein Fuehrer (said in a bad german accent). And if we don't agree with you, will you forcibly change our alignments as well and brainwash us?
: If I have to, I will.
was dead serious on that last note. honestly did not see what amounted to brainwashing creatures as evil, as long as he could justify it.
I don't know, while the D&D alignment system is genuinely awful, I'm not sure that using magic to change someone's mind about something is unarguably worse than killing them outright. At least something gets to survive and thrive otherwise; plus, the exterminate all the inherently evil brutes is pretty definitely an evil point of view to advocate.
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Apr 5, 2012 09:05
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Feb 22, 2012 10:58
