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Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

Vegetable Melange posted:

I just made my first mustard, and I think I did it wrong. Ground organic yellow mustard, salt, whole wheat flour, belgan blonde wheat ale to incorporate. It tastes a little floury, so I popped in some smoked paprika to balance it out. Dijon it's not, but it's mustard. Tips?

I'd skip the flour altogether and use mustard powder instead. It may be "cheating", but it won't taste floury. I'd also suggest an acid of some kind. Sherry vinegar perhaps.

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Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

Vegetable Melange posted:

Acidulate. Added a little lemon, tastes right up until the end. Maybe heat it a little to cook the flour?

You'd need a solid 15-20 minutes to cook out that raw flour taste. How much did you make? Can you scrap and start w/o the flour?

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
That looks like a very comfy couch. I hate my couch, but don't want to invest in a new one right now. I'm muave with jealousy.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Where's the IRC these days?

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Not cooking related either, but I was on an oil rig when we hit a pocket of natural gas. One of the gaskets on the well head failed, so we had natural gas seeping into the air. For those of you who don't know, natural gas is odorless. The sulfur smell is added by your utility company so you can detect it if it leaks in your house.

One spark from the engine on the rig and there was a huge explosion. One dead, three injured. Skin grafts hurt like a bitch!

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Fantastic:
http://bites.today.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/03/29/10924885-marilyn-hagerty-in-talks-with-anthony-bourdain-for-book-deal

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Is there a GWS google + hangout? If not, is there any interest in one?

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Where's the IRC?

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
My wife took me out for my annual sushi dinner last night for my birthday. Fantastic stuff. I had a couple of questions that the folks at the restaurant couldn't really answer for me though. So of course I turn to internet strangers.

My kids got a grilled chicken and vegetable dish. It was garnished with chips of some thinly sliced, deep fried vegetable that I couldn't identify. Circular in shape with symmetrical holes in it. They looked like 1-2" diameter lace doilies.

They comped me an ice cream dessert, and it was delicious, but the ice cream was wrapped in a gelatinous shell. I've never encountered it before. It was sticky and chewy and delicious. Anyone know what I'm talking about here?

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

pnumoman posted:

Lotus root and mochi ice cream.

drat, that was fast. Thanks!

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
A cookbook from sometime in the 14th century was recently discovered in a British library. One of the recipes is for roasted unicorne.

http://www.booktryst.com/2012/04/unicorn-recipre-discovered-in-lost.html

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

Why do you have to go and ruin all my fun things!?!?!

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

Drink and Fight posted:

You only get sushi once a year?! That's horrible!

I get supermarket sushi from time to time, and if one of my vendors offers lunch, I will pick a sushi joing 5 times out of 7. But the tradition is that my b-day dinner is sushi at a nice restaurant. I am fond of this tradition.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Whoopie pies are actually a Pennsylvania Dutch concoction. I inhereted my mom's cookbook when she died which has her hand written recipe in it. If you like I'll dig it out this weekend.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
If I had the time, I'd make all of these and post a thread about Going Deutch. However, I'm lazy/busy. Here are the requested Whoopie Pie and Shoofly Pie recipes straight from Ma's handwritten cookbook. Use your powers for good and not evil, my friends.

Now, please keep in mind that the Pennsylvania Dutch are very communal. You don't cook dinner for 2 people or for 4 people. You cook for an entire neighborhood. As such, the final yield on these recipes can be pretty large. Also, these recipes are transcribed directly from Mom's book, and there's not a lot of technique in these. I'll do my best to answer any questions, but its been quite a while since I've watched these being made. Any of my notes will be in italics

Whoopie Pies
For the filling:
2 egg whites, beaten stiff
2 T milk or cream
1 t vanilla
1 lb powdered sugar
1 1/2 c Crisco or butter
pinch of salt

For the cake:
2 c sugar 384 g
1 c lard 110 g
2 eggs
2 t vanilla
1/2 t salt
1 c thick sour milk
4 c flour 480g
2 t soda
1 c cocoa 80g
1 c boiling water

Cream together sugar, salt, lard, vanilla and eggs. Add flour alternately with sour milk. Add slightly more flour if not thick. Put soda and cocoa on top of dough. Pour boiling water over top and mix well. Drop by teaspoonfulls and bake at 400 degrees Bake for 7-9 minutes. Allow to cool completely and then spread filling between cakes.


Shoofly Pie
For the syrup
3 c molasses
1 1/2 c brown sugar
6 eggs
3 c boiling water
2 tsp soda

For the crumbs
6 c flour
2 1/4 c brown sugar
3/4 c lard

Mix and put half the crumbs in syrup mixture. Pour into pie shells and add remaining crumbs to top. Bake at 400 degrees for 10 minutes, then reduce to 350 degrees for 1 hour. Makes 6 pies.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Bonus PA Dutch recipe: Hamloaf

1 1/4 lbs ground ham
3/4 lb ground pork
2 eggs
3/4 c milk
2 c bread crumbs

For the topping:
1 1/2 c brown sugar
1 T mustard Yellow mustard
1/2 c vinegar Cider vinegar
1/2 c water

Mix the meats, eggs, milk and bread well. Press into loaf pan. Add half of topping. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour, adding new topping 3 or 4 times during baking.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
I liked the FN FAL .308 when I still lived in a state where I could go shoot.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

Thanks! Any idea what the point of the boiling water and (i assume baking) soda part at the end is for?

Also, any insight on the filling process would be appreciated. Maybe creme everything but the whites together, then add the whites like you would to a mousse (in thirds)?

I think the boiling water is meant to dissolve the cocoa powder and to partially melt the fats. Why the baking soda is incorporated at the end, I have no idea.
Two possibilities I can think of. 1) That's the way it was always done. 2) by pouring it on top and then adding the boiling water, you're starting the leavening process at the last minute, and achieving a specific texture that way.

As far as the filling goes, I don't think you need to be that careful with them. My recollection of the filling is not that it is light and airy, but more dense. The egg whites are there more to dry things out than add airiness I think.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
You can buy pasteurized egg whites at the grocery store. My wife uses them in her icings. Look for egg beaters 100% whites. Read the label, as they have one that is 99% whites and 1% garlic powder.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
While the Danish word for 'safe' might be unsafe, imagine how we all feel over here. We didn't have a word for Danish (the pastry) until you guys came along!

I once had to have a chat with HR for a similar loss of manners. We were going through our annual 'sexual harassment' avoidance seminar and the "woman" who was presenting the course started out with something like, "Every 30 seconds in the US a woman is raped in the workplace." Apparently my suggestion of "Perhaps she should ask for a shift change" was the incorrect response.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
HappyHat, please tell me all Danish television is as good as this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUZ-e2SkeMI

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Point/Counterpoint if you will. This is my first attempt at a smoked pork shoulder. It took me somewhat less than 22 hours.



Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

scuz posted:

Did you just smoke that on a regular ol' Webber? I wanna smoke meat real bad.

I smoked it on a Weber with a Smokenator 1000 attachment.

https://www.smokenator.com

Edit: Like this

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

scuz posted:

Thanks, sir! Does that thing work pretty well? It sure LOOKS like it does from your pics, but the site says it only holds enough fuel for 6 hours so I'm wondering how big of a pain it is to re-load mid-smoke (if that's necessary).

I have the hinged grate on mine, so at any time when I need more fuel, I can lift the hinge and drop briquettes and/or hardwood chunks in the holes on either side of the water pan. The water pan needs to be refilled every 60-90 minutes, so it's not a complete 'set and forget' situation, but it works very much as advertised despite the stupid name.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

If you want to get on your soapbox, just loving do it and quit being coy.

Those poor soap boxes. Are you completely clueless about how they are built, or do you just not give a poo poo?

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

Delicious Sci Fi posted:

I am against all forms animal cruelty that affects the tenderness or flavor of the meat.

http://now.msn.com/now/0426-german-students-kill-lamb.aspx

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
I'm broke 90% of the time and if I have a choice between $0.77/lb chicken and $2.99/lb free range organic happychicken, I'm gonna pay the $0.77.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

sweat poteto posted:

The economics of meat production is why I'm still a vegetarian after 30something years. If you're so broke that $2.22 makes a significant difference, fine do what you gotta do. But it's still bad news.

That's $2.22/lb, so for a single 3-4 lb bird, that's a $6.66 - $8.88 difference. $7 or $8 is an extra meal for the week.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Dear E/N

After 11 years of no new issues, my son started complaining of headaches this weekend, had a CT scan at the local ER, they found a 'mass' in a completely different area of his brain than previous issues, and now he's on his way to a children's hospital for an MRI.

Here's hoping that it was just a bad scan/read by the local ER.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

bartolimu posted:

If you're Wrong often enough, they might even make you a mod.

pi = 3

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
^^^^^ Any time marinating will be better than no time marinating. With a skirt steak, if the acid content of the marinade is high, the recipe might be advising the 24 hr marinade for the acids to start breaking down some of the tougher fibers in the meat. While there's not much that can be done to speed that up (unless you have a pressure cooker), you can minimize the chewiness by cutting the meat against the grain after cooking to shorten the muscle fibers.


The oncologist has told us that the MRI done this morning confirms the CT from last night and there is 'something' there. Based on the headaches, he is leaning towards immediate surgery. Still waiting for the neurosurgeon consult.

Phummus fucked around with this message at 16:51 on May 1, 2012

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.

Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

By the way Phummus, I went allrecipes on your whoopie pie recipe. Turns out my wife had cleaned out the cabinets and thrown out the baking soda, so I used a boxed brownie mix for the cookie part. I then made the filling per your recipe, but used crisco (and a little butter because I ran out of crisco) instead of lard, and powdered egg whites instead of fresh. These things are decadent as hell.



Edit: I'm definitely making the brownies in the whoopie pie pan again, they came out with a good combination of crispy and chewy.

Those look really fantastic!

In E/N or LJ news, I just spoke to the neurosurgeon and despite Mr. Schwarzenegger's insistence, it is indeed a tumor, and surgery will happen tomorrow or friday.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Thanks for the good vibes everyone. Surgery is scheduled for "some time" on friday, but don't have exact times yet.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Thanks for ignoring, Wrought!

No big updates. Surgery is scheduled for 7:45 tomorrow morning.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Morning, kids. Here's the latest.

My son went into surgery yesterday at 7:45am. About 10 minutes after they took him back in, the neurosurgeon came out and told me that the preop MRI showed growth from the baseline MRI 3 days prior. This indicated that it was in all likelihood not a tumor, but an abscess. So they opened him up, cut a section of his skull out and drained the abscess. They put his skull back together and stitched his scalp. Then they put in a central line...kind of like a super IV that goes almost, but not quite, to his heart.

He was awake and talking 3 hours after they took him in.

He will now be getting ridiculous doses of 3 broad spectrum antibiotics for the next few days while they culture the abscess fluids. Once they identify what bacteria they're fighting, the antibiotics may change.

The unanswered question is how he got a loving bacterial infection in his brain. According to the infectious disease doc, it was most likely a sinus infection that migrated to his brain, or some other infection in his blood stream that managed to traverse the blood/brain barrier.

Regardless f the source, he will be on the IV antibiotics for 6-8 weeks with biweekly MRIs to monitor the progress.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
We're leaving the ICU today, and he can start soft foods tonight. We are looking at tomorrow or Monday for discharge, then 6 weeks of visiting nurse visits.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
You know that 'trick' where you wave your hand up and down in front of your face, switching from a smile to a frown? That's me.

I spoke with the infectious disease doctor last night. The cultures that grew were bacteria found in the mouth. Sickson had a dental cleaning in March, so there's a new theory.

The theory is that the blood and bacteria mixed during his dental cleaning, and that the bacteria somehow traversed from the 'dirty' side of his circulatory system to the clean side without going through all the filters. The most likely way this could happen is if he has a prolapsed valve in his heart. So today is Echo Cardiogram and/or Sono of his heart to see if they can find any evidence of such. If so, it will require surgical intervention, but I am not sure to what extent. Only if they get a positive on the tests will I get to speak to a cardiologis.

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
Wow. Blue stars are hopping around like crazy. Are Bart and Adobo playing pong?

Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
I made peppermint frozen custard with chocolate chunks last night. 'Tis the season. I have more mint than I know what to do with.

Can I soak it in vodka and make extract? Freeze it?

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Phummus
Aug 4, 2006

If I get ten spare bucks, it's going for a 30-pack of Schlitz.
mindphlux, I work in a radiology group, and we had a patient refuse to drink the contrast barium because it didn't say 'gluten free' on the label. Please make sure you ask the tech if your Mag is gluten free when you go in for your test. Please.

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